by Marina Epley
“That’s a good question,” Wreck grins. “You see, it’s a bit of a mystery. Nobody ever saw Jin being pregnant. And she was a little too old for having kids when Maxie was born. So some folks back in the village seriously doubt Maxie is actually her daughter.”
“What do you think?” I ask, sitting down in a chair.
“I don’t care and neither does Maxie. Jin raised her and took care of her. So as far as we’re concerned, she’s her mother.”
“Jin also adopted you, didn’t she?”
“Well, kind of. She’s my mentor.”
“What? You mean… She taught you how to fight?”
“Yep. I practiced with Maxie, but Jin was our instructor.”
I close my eyes for a moment, collecting my thoughts. I still can’t believe it.
“Kris,” I utter in a hollow voice. “Tell me the truth. Is Jin… Jingfay?”
He nods.
“Oh my!” I breathe out. “I really found her. It just… it all seems so surreal. Is she the last Amazon?”
“I told you she’s not the last one. Jin trained Maxie so it means my sister is actually an Amazon too. And so am I.”
I stare at him. “Wreck, you can’t be an Amazon.”
“Why the heck not?”
“You’re a guy.”
“So?” He frowns. “I’m an excellent fighter and healer. I was trained by two Amazons and follow all their traditions.”
“Wreck!” I exclaim, laughing. “If a cat adopts a puppy and teaches it how to catch mice, it won’t turn the dog into a cat. The puppy will become a dog.”
“True that,” Wreck nods. “But as you can see, I’m not a puppy.”
“Oh all right. You can be whoever you choose.”
“That’s right. I’ll be who I want, and don’t give a damn what other people might think about it. Let’s go outside. Jin and Maxie should be returning soon.”
Outside, we sit side by side on the steps of the front porch. I squint, smiling into the warm sunshine. An image of Amy walking along the beach floats through my mind. I miss her terribly.
“Why does Jingfay live out here?” I ask. “She’s the true leader of the rangers, isn’t she?”
“Nah, not anymore.” He looks away, seemingly bummed out. “Jin is no longer Jingfay.”
“What do you mean?”
“Jingfay is dead, Kora. They killed that part of her. She’s just old Jin now, that’s all.”
My throat tightens and I experience a wave of dizziness. “Please tell me what happened. I need to know.”
Wreck thinks for a few moments, gazing into the distance. “It’s a dark story. You see, Jin did free many of the servants and founded the village about fifty years ago. She used to be the leader of the rangers and planned to build an army to liberate all the servants in our land. But she once went hunting in the woods and was attacked by six guys wearing masks. They stabbed her in the stomach with knives, and left her there to bleed out and die without any chance for help. But Jin didn’t die. She managed to crawl back to the village.” He pauses, his eyes sparking angrily. “I really have no idea what all she suffered through. Can you imagine crawling a mile after being stabbed twenty times? Well, me neither. It took her a full four months to heal. She never fully recovered and wasn’t the leader any longer. The villagers killed the guy who took over because everybody thought he had sent those killers to attack Jin. That’s when Tartis took over leadership… He hates Jin but can’t do anything against her, because she’s the only true healer in the village, excluding Maxie and I. That’s it. The end of the story.”
I remain silent for a few moments, tears filling my eyes.
“That’s horrible,” I mutter.
“You’re damn right,” Wreck sighs.
“Why doesn’t Jin take back leadership? You’d help her, wouldn’t you?”
“I sure would, but half of the rangers are on Tartis’s side. It would cause a bloody massacre. Jin doesn’t want that. And as I told you, she’s not the legendary Jingfay anymore. Her spirit is broken. Part of her died back in those woods.”
“So everything I believed in has been destroyed? Jingfay doesn’t exist?”
“Kora…”
“They always kill the strongest, bravest, most beautiful people!” I blurt out, crying. “They killed my mother and Amy, and now they managed to kill Jingfay!”
I cover my face, sobbing.
Wreck brings me water, patiently waiting for me to calm down. He doesn’t ask me to stop crying nor does he try to hug me or hold my hand. I truly appreciate that.
After regaining control of myself, I ask, “Wreck, could you please tell me… who changed my clothes while I was unconscious?”
He begins chuckling. “Jin and Maxie of course. What? You were hoping it was me, weren’t you? Is that what you were secretly dreaming about?” He winks, raising his head proudly. “I knew you had a crush on me. You just don’t want to admit it.”
“Stop it,” I groan, but can’t help from grinning. He’s funny sometimes.
He stops laughing. “Well, seriously, I could do that for you. It’s no big deal. I’ve already told you how I’ve been assisting Jin for a really long time. One year we had a nasty storm, and lots of folks in the village were injured. I had to help Jin with plenty of patients, both male and female. You know… treat their wounds and wash them.” He shrugs. “You do what you have to.”
I offer no comment, really grateful that it was Jin and Maxie who took care of me.
“Well I swear!” Wreck exclaims. “Supper is coming!”
Jin and Maxine walk toward us from the woods, carrying two hunting rifles and three rabbits, a beaming Tanya in tow. I spring to my feet. The little girl runs toward me and tightly wraps her arms around my waist.
“Tanya! I was missing you!” I blurt out. “What are you doing here?”
“I live here with Jin and Maxie now. Look what they gave me!”
She shows me a large hunting knife.
“Kora,” Jin says softly. “How are you feeling, sweetie?”
“I’m fine,” I answer, looking her over carefully, still not fully believing I’ve met a living legend. She’s dressed in a black t-shirt and camo hunting pants.
“Kris,” she says. “Could you please help Maxine with dinner, while Kora and I have a little talk?”
Wreck nods, quickly following Maxine back inside the house. Tanya joins them. Jin leads me into the living room, and we sit in two wooden chairs across from each other. I look at her, my hands shaking slightly.
“Jin… You’re Jingfay, aren’t you?” I ask, and she nods. “I’ve been looking for you. I wanted to meet you so badly. I hoped you could tell me what to do. I’m so lost. I no longer know who I really am.”
I tell her my story, reliving everything once again. I wind up crying, hating myself for being such a wimp but unable to hold back my tears. I can still see Amy crouching like a caged animal behind metal bars, her face bloody and frightened. I can still feel the touch of my mother as she was soothing me.
“I don’t know what to do,” I gasp, sniffling. “Where should I go? I know nothing about Bastion. Nothing waits for me there anyway. I left all my friends back in Central Settlement, but they’ll all be soon killed during the Terror Race. And I can’t do anything to help save them.”
Jingfay gently touches my hand.
“I think you already have all the answers,” she says.
“No, I don’t,” I say, shaking my head. “I have no idea what I want or need to do. I don’t know who I am. Please, tell me what I should do.”
“I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I can’t. It’s your life, sweetie. You’re the only one who can decide what you should do.”
“But I just don’t know.”
“Of course you do.”
I become silent, thinking. What do I really want? I ask myself. Who am I? Just a desperate girl who is used to following orders, one who needs somebody to make all her decisions for her. Weak, overemotional, and f
illed with self-pity. And then an image of Samuel holding the lit match crosses my mind. I feel a rush of anger.
“I can’t do what I really want,” I say. “I’m not strong enough.”
“You’re stronger than you think,” Jingfay smiles. “You want to help your friends and take revenge for your mother, don’t you?”
“I don’t know how I can do all that. How did you free the servants? How did you find so much courage and strength?”
Jingfay shrugs. “I don’t know. I admit I was scared. But there was nobody else who could help those people. I just did what had to be done.”
I take a deep breath, my eyes lowered. I still have no clue what to do.
***
After supper Wreck approaches and says, “Kora, we only have three beds in this house. Jin will sleep in one, Maxie and Tanya will share another, and you’ll have to share the third bed with me.” He grins broadly. “Sorry, but we have no choice.”
“Shut up,” Maxine groans. “Kora will sleep with me, and you’re gonna sleep on the floor, Kris. Tanya will take your bed.”
“That’s just not fair! I hate you, Maxie.”
“I hate you too, Kris,” Maxine smiles sweetly, taking my hand. “Come with me. Don’t worry about that goofball.”
She leads me away, leaving her disappointed brother behind.
Once we’re alone in her bedroom, I ask carefully, “Maxine, is there something wrong with Kris? Is he… sick?”
“Oh,” she sighs. “Did my brother have one of his loony episodes?”
I nod.
“Well,” she says. “I told you how he is a big mess. Something really terrible happened to Kris before mom found him in the woods. He was only about eleven or twelve. He didn’t speak for a few weeks. We even thought at first he was mute. After mom brought him home, we fed him and put him to bed, and the following morning we found him in the kitchen. He’d slit his wrist.” She pauses, her expression sad. “Kris stayed with us for five years before joining the rangers. He’d never so much as visited the village before. His first few months here, he refused going outside, staying inside all the time. Mom and I were the only people he spoke with.” She smiles. “But he seems to be doing much better now, doesn’t he?”
“I guess so,” I answer, deep in thought.
What happened to Wreck? What is he hiding from me? I need to know. I don’t fully understand why it has become so important to me, but I must learn the truth about this strange guy.
Lying in bed, I close my eyes and will myself to stop thinking about him. I have more important things to worry about. Tomorrow is my initiation day. And I still haven’t decided whether I should allow Wreck to drug me or not.
CHAPTER 34
In the morning, Wreck and I walk back through the woods toward the village, which is not far from Jin’s. We should make it back before noon. I can’t stop thinking of what Maxine told me about her step-brother.
“These fits you have,” I say carefully. “What are they?”
“Must be some sorta PTSD,” he mutters.
“What?”
“Oh, never mind. It’s nothing too serious. Doesn’t happen often, maybe once or twice a month.” He looks away. “I’m really sorry you had to witness that.”
“It’s okay,” I shrug, feeling sympathetic. “What do you do when you’re alone and there’s nobody around to comfort you?”
“Try to survive till morning,” he answers flatly.
“Isn’t there anything that might help? Like some herbs or something?”
“I told you I can’t take that stuff, not with my current lifestyle. They make you real drowsy, and you have to take them regularly to achieve any noticeable difference.”
I want to ask what caused his loony episodes, but already know he wouldn’t say. Instead I ask, “Have you ever… hurt anybody during a fit?”
“Yeah, only once though. I almost killed a guy.”
“Who was he?”
Wreck pulls up the sleeve of his hoodie, showing me a scar on his wrist. I offer no comment.
“Anyway, today is your initiation day,” he changes the subject. “Ready for some fun?”
I remain quiet.
“Kora,” he says. “We’re getting really close to the village. You’d better make up your mind.”
“Do I really have a choice?” I sigh. “Tartis would order Tanya and I killed, should I refuse to go through with the initiation.”
“We could just run off somewhere, you know,” he offers. “I told you that you don’t have to go through this ritual if you don’t want to. We’ll do whatever you want, all right? I’m not joking. I really mean it.”
I glance at him. Is he really willing to leave everything behind and run away with me? Why would he offer that? He’s only known me for what… five, six days?
I will myself to stop thinking about Wreck and focus on my initiation. Should I even do it? I don’t know. I doubt it. But even the tiniest possibility of learning my destiny is so tempting.
“I’m going to take Deathfall root,” I say after a few minutes of silence. “I have to try to find out who I really am.”
***
Back at his shack, Wreck hands me a few fresh leaves. “This will prepare your body for taking the Deathfall and lessen your anxiety. Sorry, but you can’t eat anything else today.”
I obediently take the leaves from his hand and place them into my mouth, without even asking what effect they may have. Left alone, I lie down on a blanket, my head suddenly becoming cloudy. I fall asleep. When I next come to, it’s already evening.
Wreck enters the room, carrying a black rooster. Tonight he’s wearing face paint again and a wolf’s skin on top of his ranger clothing which gives him a close resemblance to a real shaman. He leads me outside and we walk toward the edge of the village. The cool night air helps to clear my mind, although I’m still a little groggy after sleeping. A crowd of rangers stand around in a solemn silence, all eyes directed toward me.
“The initiation is sacred,” Wreck whispers. “Everything that happens tonight is done for you. So you’ve got nothing to worry about while you’re unconscious, all right? If Ace and his friends show up and try anything, the other rangers will kill them.”
We walk through the crowd and arrive at the entrance of a small cavern. Inside, the underground air smells of smoke and water. There are weird symbols drawn with red paint on the stone floor and walls. Five fires burn along the corners of the walls, illuminating everything in an eerie glow. Wreck directs me to sit down in the middle of a large pentagram drawn on the ground. He plops down in front of me, still holding the rooster in one hand and a knife in the other. Placed beside him are flasks, an empty bucket and some long thick roots.
“Remember the purpose of your journey,” he says solemnly. “You must find your spiritual guardian. Don’t let demons intimidate or confuse you. That’s your journey. You have all the control.”
Anxious, I listen to the sound of his voice, my teeth chattering.
“I’ll be here to remind you of which world you belong,” he continues. “I’ll lead you back to reality. Do you trust me?”
I hesitate to answer. How can you trust someone who once held a knife at your throat? One who hallucinates at night and is so unpredictable.
“I trust you,” I lie.
“Here’s the Deathfall,” he motions toward the roots. “Once it enters your bloodstream, we won’t be able to stop the ritual. The effects will last for hours. I need you to understand that.”
I take a deep breath. “Let’s do it.”
“Fine. Remove your jacket and t-shirt.”
I do as he requests, now having on only a sports bra and pants. Wreck lays the rooster on the ground and chops off its head. The headless body jumps up, frantically flapping its wings and running around in crazy circles. I watch its agony, feeling detached and numb. Once the rooster finally falls, Wreck picks it up and sits back down in front of me. Whispering something incoherent, he uses the rooster�
�s blood to paint odd symbols on my arms, stomach and face. It’s creepy.
Then he cuts a small piece of a root and places it on his palm. “According to our tradition you must take the Deathfall from my hand. It symbolizes how the responsibility of providing you with the correct dosage of the root lies solely on me.”
I lean in, snatching the piece of the root with my mouth. I grimace from the bitter taste.
“I know, it tastes like crap,” Wreck says sympathetically. “Just try to swallow it without too much chewing.”
Nauseated, I force myself to swallow the root. My stomach lurches. I clamp a hand to my mouth, suppressing a gag reflex. Wreck takes a piece of Deathfall himself, his eyes becoming instantly glazed over. He stretches out his hand, urging me to take another piece. I take a gulp of air, steadying myself, and eat more. The sound of drums and a wolf’s howling come from outside. I feel hot and dizzy, beads of sweat rolling down my face and neck. The cavern spins in front of my eyes. The flames and symbols on the walls begin mixing together. I lean forward, gagging and shuddering. Wreck places the empty bucket in front of me and I throw up.
“That’s a normal reaction,” he says calmly. “Here, wash out your mouth.”
He gives me a flask and I take a few sips of water, then close my eyes. I don’t want to do this, I think desperately. Gosh, I can’t eat any more of that stuff. But I have to.
I swallow another slice of Deathfall root, again throwing up in the bucket, then wash out my mouth. Rinse and repeat.
I wind up lying on my side, my stomach aching and head dizzy. I feel sick… so terribly sick that I realize I’m dying. Wreck raises my head, putting more of the root to my lips.
“Just a little more,” he whispers. “You’re doing real good.”
I shake my head no, pressing my teeth together, tears flowing down my cheeks.
“Kora.” Wreck gazes at me, his eyes now pitch-black from the drug. “Remember why we’re doing this.”
My destiny. I must meet my spiritual guardian and learn my destiny. I open my mouth, letting him feed me more of the Deathfall.