by Hughes, Maya
Inside, she took off her hat and shook out her hair, stomping her boots by the door.
I toed off my sneakers and hung up my coat beside hers.
She blew into her hands and took mine, cupping them and blowing her warm breath on them.
“I may have gotten a little carried away out there. Whenever the first snow hit, my dad would take me outside and we’d run around and play for hours and make a snowman, even if it was only three inches tall. So I always love the first snow. It reminds me of him and being a kid, back when everything was easy.”
She looked up at me, still trying to warm my hands.
Things had never been easy for me as a kid. Now I was bigger and stronger, and I didn’t have anyone telling me I’d be shuttled off from one place to another. I couldn’t steal the joy of this moment and her connection to her dad from her.
“I’ve always loved the snow too.” I tucked some of her hair behind her ear. “You ready for some breakfast?”
She nuzzled her cold cheeks against my newly-warmed hands. “I’m ready to ogle.” With a smack to my ass, she pulled me into the kitchen.
My cooking skills weren’t on par with Jules’s, but I tried my best.
“These eggs are phenomenal.” She scooped up another hearty forkful and I wasn’t sure if she was humoring me or not. “And I love the pancake shapes. Is this a mouse?”
It was supposed to be a heart. “Yeah, it’s a mouse.”
“The best mouse pancake I’ve ever had. The bacon is also delicious.”
“It’s hard to go wrong with bacon. Although, you haven’t seen Marisa cook.”
“I’ve heard the stories. How did she make you all sick from pasta with canned sauce?”
My stomach clenched at the memory. “I don’t know and none of us want to find out. I don’t know how she’s survived this long. She’s built up an immunity or something. A bionic stomach that could withstand even nuclear testing.”
“Poor LJ.”
Our lazy morning watching the snow and drinking hot chocolate with mini marshmallows was ended with a text—from Alexis.
“What’s wrong?” Jules raised her head, looking over at my phone.
“It’s Alexis. She went out last night with a friend and now she’s trapped in the snow and needs me to come get her. I’ve got to go.” I braced for Jules to be annoyed at the intrusion on our time—a common thing that had come up in past relationships when Alexis needed me.
“Why don’t I come with you? I’ve got some extra warm clothes we could bring her.”
“You’d do that?”
She stared at me with a puzzled look on her face. “Of course I would. She’s your sister. Let me help.”
Driving over to Alexis didn’t feel half as bad as it normally did, with Jules manning the radio in the seat beside me. I ran my hand up and down her thigh even though the heat was cranked up. We slid on the ice a couple times, but the spare tire I still had on the car managed to get us to her.
I sent her a text and she came running out in a pair of heels and skirt barely covering her ass.
“That’s a pretty dress.”
“Not in a blizzard.” She’d have frostbite on her kneecaps by the time she got to the car.
I got out and opened the back door.
“Berk, you’re here.” She hugged me. “Why are you opening the back?”
“Because Jules is sitting in the front.”
Alexis smile dropped and she peered inside. “You brought her?”
“She offered to come along, and she’s got some weather appropriate clothes for you.”
With a grim look, she slid into the backseat of the car and I closed the door.
We were back on the road and the wipers could barely keep up with the snowfall, which had turned from winter wonderland to a white out snowman massacre in the hour-long car ride here.
The spot my car had been parked in earlier was already snowed in. Throwing on the hazards, I got out to get a shovel.
“You two go inside, I’ll park and meet you in a few.” At least most people weren’t stupid enough to go out, so the spot was still there, just a bit more snow-covered than when I’d left.
“I can get a shovel and help.” Jules leaned over the center console.
“Get Alexis inside and I’ll handle the heavy lifting.” I winked at her and closed the door.
The two of them got out, Alexis wearing the extra coat Jules had brought with her hands hidden in the sleeves, looking like she was twelve again.
They disappeared and Jules came back out a few minutes later.
My sweat froze on my exposed skin and my coat felt heavier by the minute as the snow kept falling.
“What are you doing out here?”
“I was going to run home and get some provisions. Hot chocolate. Some stuff from the freezer. I figured it would make the snow day more fun.”
I let go of the shovel with one hand and wrapped my arm around her, tugging her close against me. “That’s a killer idea. Save a mug for me.” Our lips were icy hot and steam rose between us.
“Of course.” Her words were breathless, just the way I liked.
With her arms out like she was on a balance beam, Jules skidded across the street. Her front door opened and closed behind her. Three-quarters of a cleared parking space later, she came back out with her arms loaded up with containers stacked on top of containers.
Sweating my ass off and freezing at the same time, I barely cleared the space in time to help her up the steps.
“That was fast.” Her winter-chapped reddened cheeks glowed. This was what she loved to do. Feed other people and make them comfortable and happy. She sure as hell made me happy.
Inside the house, you’d have thought she’d shown up with water to a group wandering through the desert.
“Jules, you’re the best.”
“If I’m ever snowed in anywhere, I want to be snowed in with you.”
“These are so good, I hope we never have to leave this house.”
They laid it on thick, trying to keep the chocolate, vanilla, and sugar goodies coming.
“Alexis, go upstairs.” I’d noticed her sulking in the corner, having removed Jules’ warm jacket. “There’s some sweatpants and a thermal up there. You know where they are.”
Her frown deepened. I shrugged. “Fine, freeze your ass off if you’d like, but don’t expect me to bring you any chicken noodle soup when you’ve got the flu.”
“I’d hate to take that dress off, too, if I were you. It’s really pretty,” Jules chimed in.
I tucked her under my arm.
Alexis’s gaze bounced from me to Jules and she stormed across the room. “Fine, I’ll put on your clothes. Thanks, Berk.”
She disappeared upstairs and Jules turned to me, nibbling her bottom lip.
“I don’t think she likes me very much.”
I rubbed her nose with mine, the deep freeze from outside finally thawing. “She has a hard time with new people sometimes. How could anyone not like you? And you brought cookies. That’s a guaranteed friend-maker. Don’t worry. She’ll warm up to you.”
Her smile told me she wasn’t really buying it. I’d have to talk to Alexis about how I felt about Jules and make sure Alexis didn’t give her a hard time. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d gone all protective on me with a girl I was interested in.
Jules wasn’t some football groupie or someone trying to hitch a ride on my pro career. My going pro was probably the only way I’d even be good enough for Jules. She was used to living life a certain way, and without that draft pay check, I wasn’t going to cut it with only a business degree. Not that she ever made me feel like I was a kid from the wrong side of the tracks, which made me want to give her the moon and stars. She deserved them. Every single one.
30
Jules
Berk, LJ, and Keyton were in the basement, checking all the water valves after a message from their landlord. My landlord would most likely send me an inflatable r
aft if I told him there was a leak in the basement.
Marisa was on drink duty. And I was in the living room with Alexis.
She’d trudged down the steps wearing rolled-up sweatpants and a thermal, choosing those over what Marisa and I had offered to her. With her feet tucked up under her, she’d been engrossed in her phone since the guys left.
Taking a deep breath, I grabbed some cookies and made my way over to Alexis, who hadn’t even acknowledged the letter I’d written her or me for that matter. So, she hated me. I wished that was something new I was dealing with. But this time I didn’t want to let things lie. She was important to Berk and I wanted to find out more about her, maybe even be at least friendly if friends was pushing it too far for her.
“Did you want to try one of my salted caramel cookies?” I held out the container in front of me and stood in front of her.
“No.” She didn’t look up from her phone, swiping her finger over the colorful candy on her screen.
“If you’re not a fan of those, I brought a few other kinds over.”
Looking up like I’d just offered her a roach sandwich, she crossed her arms over her chest.
“I don’t want any of your baking.”
Being Brave Jules, I set down the container and sat on the coffee table across from her. “You don’t seem to like me, and I’d like to find out what I did.”
Her lips twisted and she continued to stare.
“Did you read my note? I’d really like for us to be friends.”
“Why?”
“Because I care about your brother and he cares about me too.”
Alexis’s head snapped back like she hadn’t thought I’d call her out or hadn’t noticed the eye-daggers she’d been shooting my way since she’d slipped into the back of the car. She stood up, appearing a lot taller than her five-one stature. “I have all the friends I need. And I don’t need another fake friend who only tolerates me because she’s trying to bone Berk.”
“I’m not. I mean—” My cheeks heated and I’m sure my neck was a nice deep crimson.
“That’s not why I’d like us to be friends.”
“Really?” She tilted her head to the side. “If Berk weren’t in the picture, you’d still want to be friends with me?”
“If our paths crossed, sure, why not?” I shrugged.
“I liked the letter chick better. At least I didn’t have to pretend to like her.”
“The letter chick. Was she his ex?” I wasn’t above a fishing expedition.
“The one he’s head over heels for. The one he talked my ear off about for months solid before you showed up. I’m pretty sure he’s still hung up on her. She was everything he wanted in a woman, according to him.” She said that last bit like she was chewing on broken glass.
My heart did a little flip. And then the guilt hit came. I needed to tell him. If he cared that much and thought she’d abandoned him, that had to hurt. He deserved to know.
“Excuse me for not thinking this thing you’ve got going on with him is going to last. It never does.”
And that was what I was afraid of most. How would he react when he found out I’d been lying? Which was worse, me lying as TLG or me lying as me?
“I get that you want to be a good sister and protect him and we’ll last however long we do, but I’d still like to get along with you. I don’t want you to think I’m trying to push you out.”
She sneered. “He’d never let that happen.”
“Exactly, so you shouldn’t feel threatened.”
“I don’t,” she snapped.
“Then there’s no reason for us not to get along.”
“Maybe I just don’t like you. Why do we have to get along? Are you one of those people who has to be liked by everyone? Is that why you show up with the big smile and the tractor trailer of baked goods? Because you can’t stand the idea of someone not liking you so you bribe them into it?”
I took a step back.
Hostility radiated off her and she was hitting that nail head on. Who could dislike someone who showed up with cupcakes and cookies? I’d been using that since middle school to get people to like me—or give me a chance. Or at least get people to not let their friends be shitty to me in case they didn’t get whatever I decided to bake and bring into school that day. Not that I’d had a chance to do much of it with my mom around watching everything I put into my mouth like a hawk.
And I’d carried that over into college. New student orientation, here’s some no-bake peanut butter balls for everyone. Once I’d gotten a kitchen, there was no stopping me.
“I don’t want any hostility between us to affect either of our relationships with Berk.”
She smirked. “Oh, it won’t. He’s always been there when I need him and there’s no one out there who can stop him.”
“I’d never want to.”
“You’d be the first.” She eyed me suspiciously. Who had Berk dated before me to make her so wary of anyone new in his life? What kind of women had he been with that made Alexis so distrustful?
“I’m willing to prove it to you.”
“Maybe you can. In your letter you talked about doing something special for him this semester.” She rubbed her chin. “His birthday is coming up soon.”
I leaned in. “His birthday? He didn’t mention it.”
“He doesn’t like to make a big deal out of it, but maybe you’d like to do something for him.” She looked at me out of the corner of her eye. “A surprise party?”
“That’s a great idea. I’d love to do something for him. Would you be up for helping?”
The corner of her mouth lifted. “Totally. That would be a good chance for us to get to know each other better. What did you have in mind?” She leaned in close and I went through a few things off the top of my head.
Direct Jules for the win! I’d been upfront with Alexis. Talked to her and look at us now, practically best friends planning a surprise for Berk’s birthday. Well, maybe not best friends, but at least she wasn’t staring at me like she was auditioning for a Mean Girls remake.
31
Berk
“We can store the booze out on the deck to keep it cold.” LJ took the lead up the steps.
“We’ve got a game in two days; this is not the time to get blitzed.”
He turned at the top of the steps and spread his arms out wide. “Not like I’ll be in for more than a play. What does it matter?”
“If you don’t ask Marisa to talk to her dad, you’re never going to get enough time on the field.”
“I’m not going to put that on her. She’s been at my side through some screwed up shit. I can do the same for her.”
“At the expense of your future?”
“What’s at the expense of your future?” Marisa walked out of the kitchen with a pitcher filled with brightly-colored booze.
Keyton shook his head. “Is no one else going to say it? Really? Fine, LJ’s been sidelined by your dad for ninety percent of our games… because of you.” Keyton threw it out there and it landed on the floor like an undetonated grenade.
“I told you to shut the hell up.” LJ lunged at Keyton. I grabbed him, my arm coming up around his neck as he went for Keyton’s.
“Because of me.” Marisa’s gaze ricocheted between Keyton and LJ.
LJ stopped his struggle and spun around. “It’s not because of you. It’s because he’s being an unreasonable asshole.”
“Because of me.” She stared at him with hurt brimming in her eyes. “Because I’m making you come to his dinners.”
He stepped forward reaching for her arm. “It’s not a big deal.”
“It’s a big deal if it’s keeping you from playing.” She jerked back, crossing her arms over her chest.
“And you’ve done way more than that for me.” He let his hand drop, but moved closer.
“This is your future we’re talking about. This is all you’ve ever talked about. What you’ve wanted since we were ten years old.” Flinging her a
rms out to her side, she shook her head like none of this made sense. I’d learned that a hell of a long time ago.
“And it’ll happen.”
“Not if you’re not playing most of the games. You said it was because you’d slacked off in the pre-season, but he’s stopping you from starting this season because I’ve dragged you to his house every week.”
“So what? The time I’m on the field, I make it count. It’s my turn to be there for you. After everything you’ve done for me and for my family, of course I’d do that for you.”
“How many times have I told you, you don’t owe me anything? There’s nothing left for you to repay. There’s no ledger with your debts tallied up.”
“I don’t give a shit. My dad wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for you. I’ll freaking follow you wherever you want me to go.”
His dad wouldn’t be alive? We all knew their relationship went beyond friends, but it looked like there were way more serious things they’d been keeping quiet.
“I’m not… I don’t want you following me around doing whatever I want because you feel indebted to me. We’re supposed to be friends—I don’t want you feeling like I’m lording something over you that I’d have done no matter what to help Charlie.”
She shoved the pitcher at me, the contents sloshing over the side and pouring down my chest.
Her footsteps shook the house as she charged upstairs and slammed her door.
“What the fuck?” LJ stared at the empty steps. “What did I say wrong?”
We all stared at each other in stunned silence, and at him with questions.
He sunk his fingers into his hair and yanked at the roots. “She was a bone marrow donor to my dad. Our senior year of high school. He had cancer and a rare bone marrow type. My family was tested and none of us were a match. Marisa helped me put together a big drive and she got tested. She was a match. Missed walking at graduation to do it. He literally wouldn’t be alive without her.”
“Maybe she’s afraid that’s the only reason you’re still hanging around. Or like she’s an insurance policy in case your dad gets sick again.” I held onto his shoulder.