by Brook Wilder
“I was coming to tell you,” said Hector as he let me go. “That Carlos is out. He’s lucky he was arrested, or he’d been shot in the park.”
I eyed the top of the fence. It looked considerably higher than earlier.
I braced my hands on my good leg. The aching wound in my thigh cleared the anger out of my mind as the pain swelled through me. I hated Maria, and she should’ve thanked Jane for being there or I’d have lashed out. Once again, Jane saved my life. And Maybe Maria’s face.
“How bad is his leg?” Hector asked Jane.
“He shouldn’t be on it. But he won’t listen.”
Standing next to me, Hector gripped my arm and wrapped it around his shoulder so I could lean on him. “You know, Luis, there’s a hole in the fence?”
I groaned a mocking laugh as I shook my head in disbelief. “Of course there is.”
The slash in the fence was invisible unless you knew where to look. I hadn’t known where to look. Hector decided to stay behind with Armando just in case the deputies tried to take advantage and search the place. Jane and I slipped easily through the fence and headed back to Momma’s house.
Looking for Carlos had rattled me, and I was too irritated to sit around at home. I didn’t want to go to the clubhouse either. Jane finally convinced me to ease up and give my leg a rest at her apartment. The wound throbbed, and so did my head. But her car seats were still bloody, and we had to clean them first with the garden hose.
“So, your brother dated the deputy?” asked Jane.
“Yes, when they were teenagers. Maria used to go to the same school as us. My brother, Carlos, is a smart guy. He could've gone to college.”
“Why did they break up?”
“Because love is bullshit, that’s why they broke up. It’s not worth anybody’s time to fall in love.” I scoffed. “Deputy Snob-ass arrested Carlos and put him in jail. The same man who defended her scaredy-ass on the streets. She’s the worst type of woman. Maria will step on one man’s back to reach someone richer. Love didn’t do my poor brother any good.”
Something about the look on Jane’s face made me wish I hadn’t sounded so bitter about love. But I’d thought Jane shared the same views after her divorce. Besides, it had taken her almost three months to call me, and for what? Another hook-up? Still, I shouldn’t have sounded so negative. A sweet and strong woman like Jane deserved to hope she'd find love.
I could tell by her concerned expression I was looking pitiful again.
“Hey,” I said as I finished wiping the seat clean. “Why don’t we go get take-out and relax in bed? You’ve been trying to get me to lie down all day.” I teased her. “I can spend some time with my favorite girl.”
I almost said ‘girlfriend,’ but I stopped my mouth just in time.
Chapter Thirteen
JANE
“Haven’t you ever been in love?” I asked.
Luis’s fork stopped in midair before making it to his open mouth.
After my car was dry, we’d picked up a first-aid kit from the drugstore and Pad Thai from the new place I liked. Luis admitted he didn’t eat much foreign food and that he preferred American cuisine like pizza. I knew he was kidding when he winked. Knowing Carlos was safe had soothed him and made Luis himself again. His bike was still parked behind my building. Rosa had thrown a tarp over it to keep it out of sight after I texted her. I’d thank her later, but in the meantime, I texted her I had company so she wouldn’t invite herself over. I needed alone time with Luis and the strength to finally tell him the news.
Luis stared out the apartment window at the setting sun. I hadn’t noticed before just how deep brown his eyes were. His square chin had stubble on it, but it made him sexier. It was hard to be angry with handsome Luis, but I was hurt. I wanted to believe he did believe in love so I could allow my heart to fall for him.
“I’ve had a hard time with love, Jane,” he said quietly, “and it started the day I was born. My mother was nothing like Momma. Our mother was too strung out to care for us and I know Carlos and I were not fathered by the same man. I barely had a real family except for Carlos. I couldn’t take care of him alone, and we both ended up in foster care. The beatings only stopped when I learned how to punch back. We ran away and lived on the streets. And once we proved our value, the Cazadores took us in. The club gave us a home and a family who gave a damn about what happened to us.”
He looked at me with sorrowful eyes as if telling the story brought back a rush of the most brutal kind of memories. I wanted to tell him it wouldn’t be like that for us, but could I even make that promise? Without thinking, my hands covered my belly.
“My life taught me not to trust love,” he continued. “I’m afraid of it because I’ve seen how good people, and bad, are torn apart by their hearts when love abandons them.”
It didn’t improve Luis’s melancholy mood when I started to bawl. He dropped his fork and pulled me into his chest. I was ashamed to cry so openly in front of anyone. Open mouthed, with snot bubbling, it was not a pretty sight. I did love him, dammit. And knowing he’d been treated that way made me sick with sorrow for all the times love had disappointed him. Did I dare ask him to try again with me?
I had too.
“Luis, I need to tell you something.”
Before I could speak, my phone rang. I should have ignored it, but I couldn't. Automatically, it was off the counter and against my ear as if it were glued to my hand. I didn’t recognize the California number and that should’ve prompted me to not answer. But I thought it might be work or the soup kitchen, and I should check. Again, I should have stuck with my instincts.
“Hello?”
“Jane, it’s your husband, Andrew. I’m in Whiterock Lake. What’s your address?”
The sound of my ex's emotionless voice made me cry harder. “I told you to stop calling me,” I shrieked. “Stop calling me, you loser. We’re divorced. I never want to see you again.”
“I’m your husband, Jane.”
“No. You're my ex-husband who beat me. I’m ashamed I put up with you for so long, but you had your claws deep in me. No more. Never again.”
The phone was ripped out of my hand. Luis had already shown he had no difficulty in taking my phone and speaking to the person on the other end.
“Hey, stop calling my woman,” Luis shouted. “Or I’ll show you what it feels like to be beaten.”
“Who is this?” said Andrew.
“The man your ex-wife wants to be with. Don’t call her again.”
I snatched the phone back and immediately ended the call. Maybe I should have rejoiced, but I knew Andrew. He didn’t back down. But neither did Luis. Luis would have continued taunting Andrew, and if Andrew was in California, he’d come after Luis in the same way the men on the bike had.
“I wish you hadn’t done that,” I said wiping my face.
“Did you want to speak to that man?” He stood up, but this time, he didn’t wince. His anger was back, but so was mine.
I was done crying.
“I can handle my own problems," I said.
Luis shook his head. “He’s a man and he thinks he has the upper hand over you. If I met with him once, I would take care of it. You would never hear from him again.”
“Do you want to go to prison?" I asked. "Because I don’t want you to. And what did you mean when you said, 'my woman?’”
I wanted to know, but then Luis’s phone went off. He tugged it out of his jacket pocket and looked at the screen.
“Should I answer that for you?” I asked.
Luis frowned at me, and I sat picking at my food.
It wasn’t Hector on the phone. Luis spoke in Spanish at a speed I couldn’t decipher with my lame beginner knowledge, but I did pick out a few words. Mayor, Pryor, and Disciples were repeated multiple times with growing emphasis until Luis shouted into the phone. The conversation was heated, and I had a feeling of dread when it ended abruptly.
He shoved his phone back into his pocket and
stared out the window. I didn’t have the heart to continue our argument. I could tell by his cold distance that something bad was about to happen.
I would have to carry my secret a little longer.
I was tired of shrieking back and forth. I just wanted to lie down with him and cuddle like the first day we’d met. What happened to take us so far off the path?
“What was that call about?” I asked.
I placed my hand on his forearm, and it was the connection that made him speak.
“We ride tomorrow night against the Disciples,” he finally said.
I didn’t know the purpose of a run, but I knew it was bad. As if I needed more punishment, I asked Luis, and he told me.
“The Disciples have a compound in the mountains. It’s an old campsite they use as their headquarters. Emilio ordered a strike. We are to ride in, shoot it up, and ride out. He’s spoken to the Nation and they’re coming, too. We’re going to meet up at the edge of town and ride together to give them payback.”
I sat there speechless. This was far worse than Luis threatening my ex or knife play in a parking lot. He was the father of my unborn baby and he was about to ride into slaughter. He had no regard for his own life. But he had shown regard for mine and hopefully, he would for his unborn child. My head pounded in my ears, and my heart beat as if it were breaking against my ribs. I had to tell Luis the truth. I opened my mouth to speak, but all that came out was a loud, pitiful moan.
Chapter Fourteen
LUIS
A lion can lead sheep, but a sheep cannot lead lions. Emilio demanded I stop making excuses and fall in line. As VP of the Cazadores, I had to obey. And I agreed with him. If the Cazadores didn’t present a united front, we would be picked off by these cowards until there was no one left to fight. But I knew the Disciples were not the problem. They were only the tool, not the engine. Emilio insisted he wasn't interested in the men in the photo. His outrage over the guerilla attacks wouldn’t allow him to be swayed toward reason. He would deal with the photo later, if there was a later. The run was set for tomorrow night, and the Nation would join us.
All evening, I’d been staring out the kitchen window at the roof of the house next door. It was all I could do to avoid Jane’s questioning gaze. She didn’t need to understand my language to guess something deadly was about to happen.
I’d hesitated to tell Jane, but I needed to talk to someone. I needed to rid myself of my doubts and fears. If I held onto them, I would die tomorrow. I was a strong and determined man, but I also knew the run against the Disciples was the wrong move.
Jane was on her feet and in my face. “You’re injured. You can’t go.”
She stared at me with her beautiful eyes, but all I could see was despair in them. Jane knew as well as I that it was a suicidal and foolish act.
“I don’t have a choice.” I sighed.
“But Luis, you have the photo. They may not even be the men involved.”
“They're involved, Jane.” My voice was firm. “The Disciples may not be in charge, but they’re involved.”
Jane sat down at the kitchen table. Our cold food rested on the plates there, and would probably stay that way. I’d wanted a quiet evening with my pretty girl, but the cruel life I led wouldn’t leave us alone.
“You don’t look convinced.” Jane spoke quietly as she twisted her hands in her lap.
“The Disciples are better armed, and since they’ve been picking us off, they have more people. Emilio wants to ambush them at their hideout in the mountains.”
“Where’s that?”
“In Whiterock Lake. It’s an old campsite they took over.”
Jane scoffed. “The first day I came to Mesa, I saw a Disciple drive down the highway past the bus stop.”
“Well, that’s where they’re hiding.”
I finally looked at Jane and wished I hadn’t. She didn’t say a word. Her eyes were shining and a tear ran down her cheek. I felt guilty leaving her to ride off to destruction. If I had known a day ago, I would have ignored Jane’s text for both our sake’s. And If I’d never known she existed, I would be ignorant of the feelings I felt now. Instead, I would be in the clubhouse talking shit and flexing muscle. Letting the men know I was eager to put the Disciples in their grave.
I reached out and held her hands. Jane’s small hands were cold, and I rubbed to warm them. But I knew I’d be foolish to think she was frail because of the size of her hands. Jane was a tough woman. Without hesitation, she had thrown a knife and stitched my wound. But she was a woman, and I had to remind myself I couldn’t treat her as if she didn’t have a tender heart.
She looked into my face, her eyes wide and pleading, her cheeks flushed, and her lips moist and swollen. She was pretty after she cried, but I didn’t want to see her cry ever again. I pressed my lips to her pretty hands.
“Don’t cry, Jane,” I said. “You’re not like this. You hop fences and shoot dogs out of trees.”
She laughed a little. “Dogs don’t climb trees.”
“They do if you throw them up there.”
Jane laughed again and wiped her tears dry with her napkin. Then she gave her nose a good hard blow. It was loud, and I thought she'd hurt herself.
Laughing, I pulled her out of her seat and onto my lap. She sat delicately on my good leg. My heart pounded as I pulled her close. She hesitated, but I yanked her petite body onto mine completely. Jane wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me into a hug.
“When you were a little girl,” I asked. “Did you stitch up your papa?”
She smiled. “Plenty of times. I wanted to be a vet, but Dad was my first patient. Haven’t you spent any time in the woods?”
I frowned at the thought. “I’ve seen it in the movies, and that’s good enough. What else can you do, country girl?”
She poked my chest. “I can build a shelter, start a fire, track animals, call animals...”
“Call them like on your phone?"
“No silly. Like this.” Jane pressed her fingers to her mouth and made sounds like a bird.
“I know that sound.” It was incredible to me that she could imitate a bird so well.
“It’s an owl. You wanna try?”
For a few minutes, we played with our fingers against our mouths until I made the silly sound. Jane’s bright laughter burst out of her lips, and my girl was happy again. But there were other things I wanted to do with her pleasing mouth. I wanted to feel her rosy lips on mine.
“Luis,” she whispered, “When we met, I didn’t want to become attached to anyone. I’d just gotten out of a bad relationship, and I didn’t want to get tied down again.” Jane paused and I held her tighter as if my will would encourage her to go on.
“I don’t feel that way anymore. I’d like to be with someone again. Someone like you.”
That was what I wanted. I kissed Jane’s soft lips hard as if I couldn’t stop. I wouldn’t stop. I hadn’t wanted to fall in love, but that was before I met Jane.
I paused. “I was jealous when you were speaking to your ex. That’s why I grabbed the phone away. I fight on the streets, but I’d never hit you. I‘d never hurt you.”
Jane held my face in her hands. It was as if I were precious to her and she cherished me. “I know,” she said. “It’s over between me and him. I can’t even imagine myself with anyone but you.”
I kissed Jane again. “The best day of my life was when you lay against my body, and I just held you.”
Jane stood and held her hand out toward me. I took it as she led me into her room. Her bedroom was tiny, and the twin bed filled the room, but I didn’t mind. It meant I would have her closer to me.
She pulled off her clothes, and she slowly revealed her lush body. Her pale, full breasts bounced as she unhooked her bra. I leaned over and sucked a hard, rosy nipple into my hungry mouth. Jane moaned as she held onto the back of my head, running her fingers through my hair.
I lifted my eyes and saw a devilish grin on her face. Before I c
ould move, Jane tugged down my jeans, and my hard cock bounced free. I hurried to finish undressing, stealing glimpses of Jane as she revealed more and more of her luscious body.
I climbed into her bed and tossed what seemed to be a hundred throw pillows onto the floor. Jane laughed as she climbed in beside me. I pulled her into my body, and we kissed again. I held her tight in that kiss. I wanted to be in that moment and feel her body close to mine. I memorized the feel of her creamy skin against mine, her delicate scent, and the adoring look in her eye. I just wanted the world to leave us alone.
Jane pressed against me, moaning into my mouth as her tongue urgently stroked mine. I matched her pace and rolled my body over hers. We stopped. Her chest rose up and down as she stared into my eyes. I didn’t want to rush. I wanted to take in her silky curves, smooth skin, and need for me.