Annoyed, but not willing to risk Katy’s wrath, I pull my hair out of its braid and start brushing the tangles out. It’s a wavy, frizzy mess since I braided it while wet this morning. I’m about to pile it up on my head in a messy bun, like I usually do when Katy calls a stern “Do not put it in a bun. Leave it down for once.”
“But—”
“Leave it. And put this on.” A dress is thrust into my arms, one I haven’t worn in ages. She stalks off while I slip the dress over my head. I forgot how much I liked this dress, the mustard yellow fabric is soft and stretchy, almost as good as my usual leggings, and flares out gently at the waist. The cap sleeves mean I can wear my regular bra and the crossover on the front makes my fairly-small boobs look decent. I do a little twirl as Katy comes back.
“See, I told you you’d feel better if you got dressed,” Katy says, smug.
“Fine, you were right. I’m not doing this every day though,” I warn.
“Sit,” Katy points to the edge of my bed, a tube of something in her hand. Gingerly, I perch on the edge of my bed. A little circle of her finger has me turning my back to her. “Relax, I’m not doing anything crazy.”
I hold still while Katy squirts a blob of hair product into her palm then runs her fingers through my hair. “Stop squirming.” Katy laughs. “Okay, while I have you captive. Talk to me about Trevor. I haven’t had an update in forever. Are you official now? Still no idea? I need details, please.”
Sighing, I let my shoulders slump. “Well, I was excited about him when I got home from New York. We were texting the whole week, and he kept me in a good head space before my classical variation,” I start.
“Do you think that’s why you did so much better?”
“Yeah. I was so nervous before my contemporary, I couldn’t relax at all. I ignored my phone completely and got all up in my head. But before my classical, while I was waiting, Trevor was telling me this hilarious story and it kept me distracted enough to not get so nervous.”
“He’s good for you, I think,” Katy says, pulling a brush through my hair.
“Yeah...I kinda think so too. Anyways, that’s kind of where it is. We text a lot, we do homework together a lot. He calls me sometimes.” I shrug. “I don’t know what I’m doing, so that’s kind of all there is to say.”
“Well, now I’m doubly glad we’ll have Jack to help. I think you might need some of his help too. Done. Let’s go!” I glance in the mirror on my desk as Katy heads out the door. She’s done something to make my hair look smooth and wavy instead of frizzy and wavy. Huh. It actually looks good. I survey myself in the mirror. I look pretty cute and it didn’t take that much effort. Maybe Katy has a point.
“You ready, Bug?” Jack is asking as I climb into the backseat of his SUV.
I lean forward, tapping Katy on the shoulder. “Where exactly are we going?”
“The outlet mall. I promised Jack I would buy him a pretzel for driving,” she adds, poking him in the bicep.
“She knows my weakness, I’ll do anything for a pretzel.” Jack pulls out of my driveway and onto the street, laughing at Katy’s antics. The whole drive to the mall Katy and Jack tease each other, fighting for control of the music. Jack keeps switching to loud rock, which I hate, and Katy keeps switching it to the girl power playlist I know she loves. I have to say I prefer her Missy Elliot/Lizzo/Megan Thee Stallion mix to Jack’s. I’ve never heard of any of the bands he’s talking about. Joyous Wolf? If that doesn’t sound like four dudes who got their name from an internet band-name-generator, I don’t know what does.
Finding a spot to park, we pile out of the car, regarding the outdoor mall in front of us. Beige stucco and red-brown roof tiles, the outlet mall looks like every mall in Southern California. Katy starts dragging us toward one of the multiple clothing stores.
“I thought I got my pretzel first?” Jack asks.
“You haven’t done anything to earn it yet. Keep walking. We shop and talk.” Letting go of my arm long enough to open the door, Katy herds us both inside. “Okay, first order of business. How are we going to get Hunter and Lisa together?”
That’s what this is about?
“We aren’t,” I say, walking a few steps away.
“Excuse me? I thought I heard you say you weren’t going to help make our best friend and my brother happy? What is your problem?” Not this. I don’t want to fight with Katy too.
“We have goals, Katy, boys get in the way of them. No offense, Jack,” I add.
Jack crosses his arms over his chest. Ugh, not him too. “Have to admit, Hannah, I am a little offended.” Katy steps beside him, mirroring his crossed arm look. Great, now I have both Quinns mad at me with no escape.
“Why do you have a problem with Hunter?” Katy asks.
“I don’t have a problem with Hunter. But Lisa and I decided a long time ago that we weren’t going to date because we needed to stay focused on dance. There isn’t enough time in the day for school, dance, and a boyfriend.”
“That’s bullshit,” Katy says, shocking me.
Jack quirks an eyebrow at his little sister’s language but shrugs. “You know, lots of the guys on the team date. We have just as much schoolwork as you guys, and football is just as physically demanding you know.”
“Do you guys have four hours of practice every afternoon and seven hours on a Saturday?” I ask, my own voice sounding sarcastic and harsh.
“Well, maybe not the seven hours on a Saturday, but yeah, practice after school is usually three to four hours, plus we have games every weekend during the season. I’m pretty sure we work as hard as you guys do.”
“Whatever, we don’t need to compare who works harder. We all do. The point is why are you so against Lisa dating Hunter?”
“I thought you were just as mad at her about it as I am?” I ask, legitimately confused. “She told me yesterday that when you found out you got super pissed off and haven’t spoken to her since. I thought your brothers were ‘off limits?’ When did that change?”
At my words, guilt creeps across Katy’s face. “Well, yeah. I did say that.” Holding up her hands in protest, Katy keeps talking. “But as Jack and Hunter both pointed out to me last night, I don’t actually get to tell them who they can and cannot date. And if I’m truly looking out for their best interest, I should want them to be with the person who makes them happy.”
“I pointed out that she was being selfish, not sharing you guys with us. You and Lisa are pretty fun to hang out with, who knew?”
Katy shoves Jack. “And I was mad that she never told me, that she kept it this big secret! We were hanging out, watching you dance and then all of a sudden, they were...canoodling. Anyone would have been shocked.”
“Not me.” Jack laughs at Katy. “I knew he had a thing for Lisa, ever since Spring Break.” He grabs Katy in a headlock and rubs his knuckles on her head. “I won the bet, fair and square!” Katy squeals and shoves at him, trying to get Jack to stop, arguing that he cheated since he knew before they made the bet. I can’t help laughing at them, even if they’re causing a scene in the store. I flick through the clothes to my right while I wait for them to get it together.
“Anyway,” Katy finally says, running her hands over her hair to smooth it back down. “Like I was saying. It took me by surprise, that’s all. But now,” she droops. “God, Hunter is so sad. I can’t take it. And seeing Lisa all sad and droopy too? I have to make it up to them. This is our,” she points to the two of us, “fault. We made them sad by breaking them up, so we have to fix it.”
I keep going through hangers, not seeing any of the clothes I’m flipping past. Is it our fault? I was only trying to help, remind Lisa of our goals. Do I even want those goals anymore? Questions flick through my brain as fast I flick through the hangers, so quick I barely finish one thought before another takes its place.
Did I hurt my best friend?
I keep discouraging Lisa from dating Hunter, but here I am hoping for advice on being more than friends with Trevor. Doesn’t that make me the biggest hypocrite?
Did I just try and do the same thing to Lisa that I wanted to do to Olivia? Come between her and the boy she likes, who obviously likes her too?
I picture Lisa alone in class, without Katy or I there tonight to boost her. I know she had a bad day, I helped ruin it. She was already so upset and stressed about her grade in Chemistry and now I know why it was so important to her. She needs that grade to be able to go to PSB.
I can’t help her get a better grade, but I do know who can.
“I think we need Hunter’s help.” I finally say, turning back to Katy and Jack. “She won’t give in unless she improves her Chemistry grade. The deal she made with her parents to be able to go to PSB is that she has to have at least a ninety-five percent in all of her class by Friday.”
“No wonder she lost it at lunch,” Jack says. “Hunter told me all about her yelling at him for getting a seventy percent on a quiz, but if it dropped her grade…”
“That’s why she was yelling about a ninety-four…” Katy chimes in.
“When is their project due?” I ask, cutting them both off.
“On it!” Jack whips out his phone and starts texting, I assume, Hunter.
“While we wait, let’s talk about Trevor.” I swear, Katy is rubbing her hands together in glee.
Instantly, my cheeks heat. Talking about my friend’s love life is so much easier than my own, especially with Jack here. But Jack is probably the one who can give me the best advice. “I don’t know what’s going on. I like him. He’s sweet, he’s funny,”
“He sends you a million texts in a row,” Katy adds, laughing.
“Well, yeah.” My cheeks are about to catch fire, they’re so hot. “He’s never said anything about us dating or anything, we just talk a lot. Are we friends? Are we dating? I don’t know what we are and I’m too embarrassed to ask. I have no idea what I’m doing!”
Jack elbows Katy out of the way. “Go pick out something to try on, I got this.” He rubs his hands together with a grin, just like Katy.
Pulling out a pair of pink, heart-shaped sunglasses Jack slides them on before firing questions at me. “Does he always text you first? Or do you text him first?”
“He texts me first.”
“Do you ever call him first?”
“Um, once? Well, I asked him to call me.” Jack hands me the sunglasses and I slide them on, striking a silly pose with them.
“Did he?”
“Yeah.”
He pulls a hat off the mannequin and drops it on my head before asking, “Right away?”
“Yeah.”
“What’s the longest you’ve gone without hearing from him in the last month?”
I have to think about that one for a moment. “I didn’t hear from him for about three days when I went to New York.”
“Did you miss him? Who texted first that time?”
Aware of the staff in the store staring, I hand him back the hat and sunglasses, “Yes, I missed him. And I texted first.”
Jack nods his head, rubbing his chin in an exaggerated way. “Well, it sounds to me like a classic case of shy people syndrome.”
“I’m sorry, what?” I laugh.
“You both like each other, but you’re both too shy to make the first move. One of you is going to have to make the move and I think it should be you. It sounds like your boy is putting himself out there, but he isn’t sure of your feelings, so he’s hedging his bets. He doesn’t want to lose you as a friend, but he definitely wants more.”
Katy comes wandering back, her arms full of clothes. I haven’t pulled a single thing off a rack yet. “Any news?”
Jack eyes her armload and rolls his eyes. “Hunter said they’re turning it in tomorrow so their teacher can grade it and post the grade by Friday. He’s working on it right now. I think we have to trust him to make sure it’s good enough.”
“Did you tell him why?” I ask, wondering when he could have done it since we were talking the whole time.
“I did,” Katy says, handing half the pile of clothes to me. “These are for you to try on.” At my dubious expression, Katy huffs. “Humor me, please? We never do girly stuff like this, I’m living all my teenage movie dreams right now. And yes, there will be a dressing room montage, don’t even fight me on it.”
Dutifully, I follow Katy to the dressing room, while Jack wanders off to do whatever it is boys do when girls try on clothes. My phone buzzes in my pocket but my arms are too full to pull it out and look. Katy glances back over her shoulder. “I heard that buzz, think it’s Trevor? Have you sent him a picture of you right now? Because you look adorable and you should.”
Katy wasn’t kidding when she claimed a movie montage was about to happen. Pulling me into the largest, family-sized dressing room with her, we start trying on outfit after outfit. We’re laughing and having fun, but I can’t help wishing Lisa was here too. And even Olivia. Maybe once school gets out, we can do this together before Lisa and I leave for PSB.
I refuse to think she’s not going to come with me.
Wait, when did I stop feeling anxious about going back to class? Probably around the time I stopped obsessing over the disappointment of not winning, when Katy dragged me out of the house.
While I wait for Katy to change again, I turn the thought of going back to class tomorrow over in my mind. My stomach stays exactly where it’s supposed to, no clenching or cold sweat. Yeah, I’m not loving the idea of facing Ms. Parker and my classmates again, but maybe the only person who thinks I failed is me? When did my goal change from just being brave enough to go, to actually winning? Winning was never the goal, Ms. Parker never said a single word to me about winning anything, she just wanted me to go, to try, to see where I stacked up against other dancers my age.
And I didn’t win. But I didn’t fail either. I made it to the finals, didn’t I? Out of how many competitors, I made it to the top fifteen in my age group? Shouldn’t that be good enough?
“Hannah? Hello? Are you having an epiphany over there?”
“Kind of?” I answer, pulling a blue dress over my head.
“A ballet epiphany or a Trevor epiphany?” She grins as she takes the dress I just tried on and pulls it on over her head. “Oh, that one is so much better on you than me,” she says, eyeing me.
“Are you guys almost done?” Jack calls out from somewhere outside the dressing room. “I’m hungry!”
“Almost! Smile!” Katy snaps one last picture of me, then poses while I do the same for her. I insist on hanging all of the clothes back on the hangers before we leave, my mom has told me too many horror stories of her years in retail while she was in college.
Jack leads us out of the store to the food court, which thankfully is enclosed against the hot sun “So, I did a little digging on your boy while you girls were busy.”
“Wait, how?”
“Katy mentioned he was Tyler’s cousin,” Jack shrugs. “It wasn’t hard. Tyler didn’t know a lot, but he thinks that Trevor is definitely still into you.”
“What is this, junior high? Everyone asking everyone else’s friends if they like someone?” Katy laughs. “We know they like each other, now we have to figure out how to get them past the friendzone.”
“I have thoughts on that, but first, I need a pretzel.”
Me: I skipped dance today to hang out with Katy and her brother. We’re plotting to get Lisa and Hunter together.
Trevor: How goes the plotting? Any nefarious deeds I should be aware of? Or will Katy’s brother bail you out of jail if necessary?
Me: Since Jack is the one most likely needing to be bailed out that’s questionable.
Trevor: Ah, a bad boy.
Should I be worried?
Katy squealed in my ear at Trevor’s latest text. “Sorry!” She whispered, like Trevor was going to overhear her. “Jack, Jack. You were right.” I tune Katy out as she replays my messages to Jack. When Jack first suggested I mention his name to see if Trevor reacted, I was against it. Being manipulative? That’s not me. But I can’t say I regret it now, seeing his reaction.
“...opportunity.” Jack is saying as I tune back in.
“What?”
“I said, now is your chance to reassure him that you’re his girl. Perfect opportunity,” Jack repeats himself.
“I use those words? His girl?”
“Isn’t that what he called you in that text you saw of Tyler’s?” Katy reminds me.
“Yeah…” My thumbs move across the screen, typing out a message. Are my fingers possessed, am I really writing this? Is this me? Timid, goody-two-shoes Hannah O’Brian, boldly declaring my feelings? I stare at the message I typed, thumb hovering over the send button.
Me: Nope, I’m your girl.
Reading over my shoulder, Katy taps her thumb on the send button before I can delete it.
“Katy!”
“You were going to chicken out, I could tell,” She pops a bite of pretzel in her mouth, calm as can be, as if she didn’t just potentially change everything. “Relax, Hannah, it’s not that big a deal.”
“Yes it is Katy! What if he—”
“The boy likes you, it’s going to be fine,” Jack chimes in, patting my head in what I assume is his idea of brotherly reassurance. My phone buzzes on the table.
Trevor: You mean that?
Breathe, Hannah, breathe. What do I do? What do I say now?
I need to respond quickly, before Trevor gets nervous, or starts sending me another dozen texts. But I need to do this on my own, not with help from Katy or Jack.
Me: Yes
There. That’s at least the truth. I don’t know what else to say but at least he can’t misinterpret that. Right?
Trevor: I have never wished harder for the ability to teleport than right now.
Head to Head (On Pointe Book 2) Page 18