“’Night, Alex.”
Walking through the bar to the front door, I have to really focus on not twisting my ankle in my heels. Falling while drunk is the ultimate sign of sloppiness. And I’m a classy bitch.
“There you are! Come on!” Courtney yells from the inside of a big pickup truck.
Opening the back door, I squeeze in next to Ashley. “Hey, Jack. Thanks for taking us. Jake isn’t answering his phone.”
“No problem,” he answers in a deep, rich voice.
Laying my head back, I close my eyes for the short ride back home, and when we pull up to the house a few minutes later, I hop out and almost fall on my face.
Ugh! I forgot that Jake always helps me down from these huge things. And I’m wearing heels. And I’m drunk.
Great. Another thing I needed help with but Jake is apparently too busy to answer me.
Fuck. I’m way too dependent on him. I’ve been a self-sufficient, independent woman my entire life, and now what? A man finally treats me right and I suddenly need him for everything?
Hell no. Fuck that.
“You good, Ally?” Courtney asks from her seat.
“Yes! I don’t need help with everything. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself.”
“Okay, I feel like I missed out on an entire conversation, but I’m glad to hear that.”
“Never mind. Yeah, I’m good. Thanks, Jack, you’re a prince. ‘Night guys.” Waving bye, I walk up the porch steps and open the door, ushering the girls in before me.
“Who wants to crash with me?” I ask. But before anyone can answer, Ashley collapses on the couch and stretches out, closing her eyes immediately. “Okay, I’m not carrying her, so she’s staying there.”
“Fine with us. We’ll take the spare room. Love you, Ally-cat.” Mel and Ellie hug me and kiss my cheek.
“Love you, too. ‘Night.”
Heading into my room, I flop down on the bed and undo the straps on my heels, kicking them onto the floor. Ahhh, that feels good.
Checking my phone for the tenth time tonight, there’s still no messages from Jake. But there is one from Courtney.
I don’t want to be the one to tell you this, but Jack just told me something…
What?
He was out tonight.
Who? Jack?
No. Jake.
Okay…
With his ex.
What ex? Are you serious?
Yeah. Jack saw them having dinner at Anthony’s when he went to pick up takeout.
So, the night I go out with my friends, he goes off and has a secret dinner with an ex he’s told me nothing about?
I don’t know. Maybe it was a coincidence??
How?
I don’t know, I’m trying to be optimistic.
Who even is she??
Jack said they were together in high school and college, and then he came back a few years ago alone. That’s all he knows.
What the fuck? Is this why he froze when I asked him about his past on the way to Bar Harbor? I just figured he had his heart broken and he was too manly to talk about it. I never thought he could be hiding something like another woman…
Why did he hide this from me? And why hasn’t he answered me? Are they back together?
I’m sorry, Ally, I have no idea.
I don’t stay with liars or cheaters.
You don’t know anything other than they had dinner together, though.
I know enough. Whatever, I’m going to bed. Thanks for telling me.
Of course. See you tomorrow.
Rolling over, I slide my feet onto the cold wood floor and lift my dress up and off of me. Throwing on sweats and a t-shirt, I stumble down the hall to use the bathroom and grab a bottle of water from the fridge before I stumble my way back to bed, flopping down face first.
I will not let Jake break me.
He’s not allowed to.
He wants to ignore me all night so he can have a secret dinner with his secret ex? Fine. I’ll ignore him right back, and then break up with him before he has the chance to do it to me.
But breaking up would mean we were together, and I have no idea if we ever really were.
Maybe I was just an easy lay for him once he realized I couldn’t resist him.
Letting out a frustrated sigh, I roll over and stare at the ceiling, praying for sleep.
Chapter 23
I can’t get comfortable. Tossing and turning, I flip my pillow to the cool side, and lay face down on it.
I sobered up pretty quickly after Courtney texted me, and now I can’t shut my brain off. Jake went out to dinner tonight. At Anthony’s. Where everyone in town would blatantly see him with her. That’s a slap in the face to me. He’s making me look, and feel, like a fool.
Letting out a frustrated sigh, I punch my pillow and decide to give up on getting any sleep. Rolling out of bed, I head into the kitchen and make myself tea, letting the hot liquid calm me.
Sitting at the table, I look at the clock and see that it’s already after four in the morning, and with nothing but the quiet of the night to keep me company, I think about the first time Jake made me tea. I was so surprised he even knew how.
Tears prick my eyes and I blink them away, refusing to cry. I told myself I wouldn’t let another man hurt me, but Jake had somehow seemed like an exception. He had found a way to break through the walls I built around my already cracked heart, and filled every broken piece of me with everything that he is.
But now I can feel those same cracks slowly starting to fracture again, a constant ache radiating out from my chest. A few tears escape my eyes and run down my cheeks, splashing onto the table. Shivering, I sip my tea, trying to warm my chilling body.
I let him into my past, and I let him understand me. I handed myself over to him piece by piece until he had everything. He has everything. I trusted him with my past, present, and future. Something I never wanted, or intended, to do.
Looking around the small kitchen that I’ve grown to call my own, I see him everywhere. Jake and I had our first kiss in here. He lifted me up onto the counter and seared me with his touch. It was in that moment he marked me as his, and I craved him like an addict needing my next fix.
Cradling my head in my hands, a few tears escape my eyes.
Was all of this just some game to him? Was he just buying time until he could be with her again? Has he been talking to her this whole time?
I feel so stupid. It’s like the other shoe has finally dropped. It was all too good to be true.
Long after the cup of tea in front of me has gone cold, I see the sky start to lighten through the window.
Fixing myself a fresh cup of tea, I head outside and curl up in one of the wicker chairs with a blanket. I catch the sun just starting to peak itself up over the horizon, its rays shining out in every direction trying to rid the world of darkness.
I’d like to think that maybe it’s a sign I should let the light overpower the dark in me, but it’s in the darkness that I’ve lived my entire life. It’s the place that has never let me down. Living in the shadows has let me control my life.
But ever since Jake showed up at my door that first night, I’ve slowly been losing that carefully constructed control I’ve held onto.
My tears dry in streaks down my cheeks and I look over at the empty chair next to me. Curling my hands around the mug, I hold it to my lips and let the steam warm my face.
I don’t know why I’m so emotional about all of this shit. I’m usually stronger than this. No, I know I’m stronger than this. I should just drive over to his house and demand the truth. But I can’t. Either I don’t want to hear the truth, or I just want to wallow in my own self-doubt and pity.
Probably a little bit of both.
“Hey, Ally-cat,” Mel whispers from the doorway. “Do you mind if I join you?”
“Of course not. Come sit.”
“Wow, that’s beautiful,” she says, looking out at the sunrise.
“I
know. I’ve seen a lot of them already, but it never gets old.”
“Why are you up so early?”
“I haven’t really even been to sleep.”
“Why?” she asks, and I just shrug my shoulder. “Come on, tell me. Is it Jake?
Nodding, I take a sip of tea. “Courtney told me that Jack saw Jake out last night, and that’s why he wasn’t answering me.”
“Okay?”
“He was out to dinner with his ex.”
“Are you serious?” she whispers, her eyes widening.
“Mhmm.”
“Maybe they were just catching up? Maybe they’re friends?”
“No, I don’t know. But my mind has already went to the worst.”
“I know you’ve been burned time and time again, but from what you’ve told us, Jake seems different. Is he dumb enough to screw up what you two have?”
“If you asked me yesterday morning, I’d have said no. But now I’m not sure.”
“Why is this morning any different? Do you trust him?”
“Yes. Well, I mean, I did.”
“If you trust him, then don’t let that waiver before knowing everything. Jumping to the worst conclusions is natural, but don’t let them make you think something that isn’t real.”
I sip my tea, thinking about that. “You’re right.”
“I know.” She smiles softly. “You guys will talk today, and it’ll all be fine. I’m sure of it.”
“I’m glad one of us is.”
Mel has always had the ability to calmly assess a situation from all angles, and help you see that you’re not always seeing the big picture. She’s saved each of us from looking like idiots a time or two.
Watching the sunrise in comfortable silence, I sip my tea and wrap the blanket tighter around me.
“Are you hungry?” I ask after a while.
“Starving, actually. I was hoping you’d make one of your hangover breakfasts.”
“A night out wouldn’t be complete without one.”
“Exactly.”
Mel and I head back inside, and I make banana, blueberry, and cinnamon pancakes with bacon and eggs on the side. Brewing a fresh pot of coffee, we go and sit to eat when a groggy Ashley and Elizabeth shuffle into the kitchen.
“Oh my god, what smells so good?” Ellie moans.
“And why are you up so early?” Ash grumbles.
“I made pancakes, bacon, and eggs.”
“And we’re up early because we wanted to watch the sunrise,” Mel adds.
“Sunrise? Are you freaking kidding me? I can barely open my eyes right now.”
“Well, Ashley, some of us can hold our liquor better than others. You know that.”
“Whatever, Mel,” Ash snaps back as her and Ellie make themselves coffee and a plate of food.
“Mmm, I’ve missed your hangover breakfasts, Ally,” Ellie says around a full mouth.
“Me, too. They’re the best.”
“Thanks. I miss cooking. I haven’t gotten to do that much of it in the past few weeks. Jake always wakes up before me to make us breakfast, and then usually makes me dinner, too.”
“Where can I get one?” Ash asks, pausing mid bite.
“I guess you’ll just have to move here.” I shrug.
“I’ll have a look around, first. Maybe sample the options.”
“You make it sound like a meat market. You’re talking about guys here, right?”
“Oh, Melanie. Sweet, sweet, Melanie. Yes, I’m talking about men.”
“Excuse me for not thinking about men like a buffet to sample.”
“No one ever keeps my interest for that long, you know that.”
“Alright, enough,” Ellie interjects. “Can I please eat without thinking about you sampling the taste of men?”
Shrugging her shoulders, Ash bites into her bacon. “What are we doing today?”
“I thought we’d head into town and walk around. Do a little shopping, and then stop in at the café where I work and Courtney owns.”
“When do we get to meet Jake?”
“Oh, um.” My eyes dart over to Mel’s. “I don’t know. He might not be available anymore.”
“What the hell does that mean? He doesn’t want to meet us?” Ashley asks, a surprised look on her face. “Aren’t we going to his family’s BBQ tomorrow?”
“Okay, calm down. I just haven’t heard from him so I don’t know what’s happening.”
“Why are you being shady?” Ellie asks.
“I’m not being shady.”
“You are. What happened between yesterday and today?”
Thankfully, Mel comes to my rescue. “Alright, guys. Just let Ally figure some stuff out and then she’ll tell us what’s happening.”
“Whatever. I’m taking a shower,” Ash declares, getting up.
“And I’m going to lay down again. We’re not done with this though, Ally,” Elizabeth adds, pushing her chair out.
When it’s just Mel and I, I sigh, covering my face with my hands. “I hate this. I feel so stupid. And you guys are here to see this.”
“Ally, we’re your best friends. I’m glad we’re here for you right now. Do you want me to tell them?”
“No. No, I’ll do it. Thanks, though.”
* * * *
I forgot that I left my car at the bar last night, so Mel drives us into town. “This looks like it’s straight out of a Hallmark movie.” She laughs.
“I know. I thought the same thing my first day here. Do you guys want to stop at the café first?”
“Let’s maybe check out a few stores first so it’ll work me up into needing a donut.”
“Sounds good.”
Browsing around the shops, they each buy a few cute things, and I decide to get the jewelry and dress that I had seen on my first day.
I haven’t been in the bookstore yet, so when we step through the doors, the familiar scent off old and new books wafts into me. I love that smell.
A half-hour later, I finally decide on a mystery novel for my next read. I definitely can’t be bothered with anything involving romance right now.
“Okay, I’m ready for coffee now,” Ash sighs. “And to sit down. I’m still a little hung over.”
“Alright, let me just pay for this,” I tell them, holding up the book.
The café is only a little farther down the street, and when we reach it, I wave my hand at the sign. “Here we are, The Blueberry Café.” Pushing the door open, the familiar bells jingle above our heads, and the scent of coffee and sugar hits us immediately.
“It smells amazing in here,” Ellie groans as we walk up to Courtney behind the counter.
“Just so you know, Ally, you’ve now been the cause for two raging hangovers in less than a month when I went years without one. Thanks so much.”
“Nothing one of Ally’s hangover breakfasts can’t cure.”
“Or some of these pastries,” I add. “The first weekend I was here, I’m pretty sure I got drunk like two or three times and had to come into work and shove both a donut and pastry in my mouth. Coffee and sugar make everything better.”
“True.” Courtney smiles. “Now, what can I get you ladies?”
I choose a blueberry crumb cake square, Mel gets a glazed donut, Ash a bear claw, and Ellie goes for the donut of the week – a strawberry shortcake donut with a whipped cream and fresh strawberry filling.
Sitting down at one of the tables, we all dig in straight away. Moaning with every bite, we start to sound like a group of wanton women desperately in need of men. Which, sadly, really isn’t too far from the truth.
“You ladies good over here?” Courtney asks, coming over to our table. “I can’t help but hear the orgasmic sounds you’re making.”
“Oh, shit. Yeah, this is amazing.” Ellie smiles, licking her fingers, savoring every last bit of filling that’s spilled out.
“Ally, can I show you something new I got in yesterday? It’s in the kitchen.”
“Yeah, sure.”
“It’s fine.”
“Did you talk to him yet?”
“No. I’ll just have to see what he says. If he says anything at all, that is.”
“Weren’t you supposed to have dinner together? He has to reach out before then. Why don’t you call? Or just go over there?”
“Yeah, we’re supposed to meet at Anthony’s, but I’m not sitting through a dinner at the same place he took another woman and pretend like everything’s fine. And no, I’m not reaching out. He’s going to have to come to me.”
“Ally, he wouldn’t cheat on you. And even if he did, he certainly wouldn’t be going out to dinner in town where everyone would see. That’d be fucking stupid. Don’t be stubborn. Go to him.”
“What else am I supposed to think? I haven’t talked to him in over a day. He hasn’t responded to any of my messages or calls. I stopped bothering after you texted me. He probably spent the night banging her every which way to Sunday. They had a lot of years to make up for.”
“Wow, okay, I see we’ve jumped to insane conclusions already. I’m just trying to stay positive here. Maybe he didn’t want to ruin your night with your friends by telling you about it.”
“We’ll see.” I shrug, not really knowing what else to say.
“Yes, you will. Okay, I have to get back out there before people start stealing shit.” Hugging me again, she kisses my cheek. “And look on the bright side. If he really is a complete asshole, we can always slash his tires and drill holes in his boats.”
“Sounds good.” I smile, that thought actually comforting.
Returning to the table, all three of them turn to look at me. “Yes?”
“What did she say?” Ellie asks.
“Nothing.”
“Bull. We let you slide earlier, but something’s up. Just tell us.”
Sighing, I pick at the crumbs on my plate. “Jack, Courtney’s husband, saw Jake last night at dinner with his ex. An ex I know nothing about.”
“Ally, what the fuck?” Ash cuts in angrily.
“And I haven’t talked to him since yesterday morning. I’m assuming that’s why he was too busy to answer me last night.”
Her Maine Attraction: A Small Town Romance (Pine Cove Book 1) Page 22