He looks away.
“But,” I add, comforting him with a slight squeeze of my hands, “I wasn’t ready to do ‘us’ together, and we figured that out, right?” He nods and looks back into my eyes. I notice his nose is running, but he doesn’t care, and he’s not letting go of my hands. “I don’t know what God has for us. But right now is good—really good—so let’s ride that wave, okay?”
He smiles through shiny eyes and manages, “Okay.” One more tear escapes from him before he kisses me again, and I hold on to the kiss for a precious moment. I think back to the competition today, how hard I fought, and how full I felt, even though I didn’t think Jake was there. Then I release him, a strange strength not entirely my own filling me, and I lead him back out from behind the bathroom wall, back toward our friends—our tribe—the family who’s had our backs from day one. Sure enough, they cheer in the distance when we emerge. Tonight’s another story, a chapter that will begin without him. And I’m worried and terrified and sad and all the things. But I also know my posture when the sun’s shining, so I know ultimately I’ll be okay, with or without Jake. God’s brought me this far, and He hasn’t failed me yet.
I’m still here.
Acknowledgments
Michael Bourret, you are a man of character, wisdom, professionalism, and kindness. You’re a brilliant agent, and anyone in YA will attest to that. I can no longer joke with you about how you can sell everyone’s book but mine! Lol. I wish I had enough words to encompass my gratitude for your faith in me.
Francesco Sedita, I love that you reached out to my agent with a simple, “So I have this idea . . .” Thank you for being bold in your creativity and vision. Nathaniel Tabachnik, thanks for the coffee meetings when I flew to New York for the day just to ask you all the rookie questions. As editors, you both have been so supportive and insightful through this journey.
Sometimes I’ve read books and wondered how errors still made it in. Now I know. Caroline Press wasn’t their copyeditor! Sara LaFleur and Vivian Kirklin, if proofreading interiors doesn’t work out, you really should become crime scene investigators. Rebecca Behrens, do they give prizes for copyediting? You’d podium for sure. I thought my manuscript had zero errors. So many times I would say to Nathaniel on the phone, “How did they find that?”
Lynn Portnoff, I’ve no clue how you climbed into my head and designed a cover that was better than I imagined, but I’m grateful for your magical powers.
Lesley Downie and Scott Sussman, you were my filters, soundboards, thesauruses, and way better wordsmiths than I could ever hope to be. There aren’t enough margaritas to repay you, even if we were college students on spring break in Cabo with an open bar. Seriously. You made this book happen.
Phil Blyth, thank you. For constantly asking me for another chapter. For telling me, “You’ve got this,” when I clearly felt like I didn’t. For taking notes as I read aloud so you could point out the good stuff. For trying your darndest to stay up with me as I finished the last page at dawn. You almost made it. Haha. You were this book’s momentum.
Lori Polydoros, thanks for the Long Beach writing dates! Mark Cole, thanks for explaining all the scoring rules for surfing. Kayla, Cora, Josie, Melody, Shannon, and Anna, thanks for being stoked at the first chapter. Mom and Dad, my constant cheerleaders, set your pom-poms down for a sec and pick up a brandy. I did it!
Vanessa Hernandez, you win for the best pep talks ever: “This isn’t a Pulitzer, so get over your writer’s block already.” Ha! Twenty years ago, you told me to write a YA novel. I’m tardy, but I listened.
Jesus, I’ve written so many books and offered them to the world, but this one you offered to me. Humbled that you’d entrust me to give everyone a glimpse of what I see when I see you. You are complicated, but I’m not going anywhere.
And last, but far from least, Dawn Brooke Owens, you left me an index card that reads, “Please don’t ever stop writing. My world needs you to be an author.”
I didn’t stop, B-town. :) See you on the flip side.
About the Author
Heather Buchta graduated from Loyola Marymount University with a B.A. in communications, but she'll tell you the real B.A. in college is learning how to pay bills. After receiving her National Certificate in Youth Ministry Studies from the Archdiocese of Los Angeles, she directed youth ministry programs and confirmation classes for both Catholic and Protestant churches. In addition, she taught high school English for a decade in South Central LA. Today, she is a part-time youth pastor for The Rock Covenant Church. In her free time, she enjoys traveling, obstacle-course racing, rock climbing, and snowboarding. She lives in the beach cities of Los Angeles, where she dotes on her dog and writes stories from her indoor porch. Beyond the Break is her first novel.
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Beyond the Break Page 28