by Kim McMahill
Nyla reluctantly exited the car and strolled toward the house, her mind still on the past. When her grandmother had arrived, radio frequency identification tags, microchips and DNA sampling were still optional, but before long, the power of the State Law and Information Commission grew and life had become almost as oppressive as the rest of the country. SLIC still wasn’t as powerful in the sparsely populated Southwest, primarily due to geography, otherwise Nyla and her friends would have never considered the daring adventure they’d just committed to.
Pausing before going inside, she scanned her neighborhood. Over the years, she had located all the surveillance cameras and found one camera hidden and positioned solely to watch her homeit hadn’t surprised her given their situation. Nyla had examined it and felt confident she could adjust its field of view to exclude her house, but she had left it alone, not wanting to test her knowledge before necessary.
Nyla couldn’t put it off any longer. She had to go inside. She disliked the dreary confines of their house and knew Grandmother Ruby did too. Ruby had migrated west seeking a better life for her daughter, but instead Rachel had ended up in the Facility. Now Ruby was left with a strong-willed granddaughter, several photographs and a hand-written journal. The memorabilia always inspired longing in Nyla and she treasured the stories of how her grandparents met and fell in love, tales of their travels, growing up with siblings, and starting their family together. The pictures showed a life full of adventure and they gave Nyla courage, which she needed now more than ever.
She flashed her palm over the scanner pad and waited as the door eased open. As Nyla entered the dimly lit, sterile environment, she spotted her grandmother sitting in a dark corner of the living room. Ruby was still and ashen and the look sent fear coursing through Nyla’s body.
“Grandmother, look at me.”
Ruby peered up through dull lifeless eyes. “Don’t look so frightened and sad. I so miss the warm smile you used to wear when you were young. I would ask where it’s gone, but unfortunately I know.”
“What is it, Grandmother? Are you feeling okay? Do you need a doctor?”
“My physical health is fine and my mental health is beyond repair. Turn on the radio and sit with me for a while.”
Nyla did as requested, but became even more concerned since Ruby despised the state-run radio stations. They seldom turned on the broadcasts unless they wanted interference. She sat next to her grandmother and they both wrapped their left hand with a towel. Nyla felt certain the embedded chips couldn’t transmit voices or she would have been arrested years ago, but Ruby never took any chances.
“Nyla, I burned the photographs today.”
“Why? How could you do that? I loved those pictures. They gave me hope. They made me dream.”
“I know and it frightens me. Your mother had dreams and look what happened. This life may not be what I consider free, but it’s better than being locked up. Maybe we’re just abnormal dissidents, the three of us. Most of society has accepted the new order without complaint.”
“What about your journal?”
“I should have destroyed it too, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it yet. But those are my memories, Nyla, not yours, and I don’t want you reading it anymore.”
“What happened to you? You’re the one who kept migrating west to retain your personal freedoms. You didn’t just give up and conform like everyone else and I’m not willing to conform either. You were strong, you inspired mother and you inspire me.”
The old woman hung her head as if ashamed. She looked so beaten down that anger surged through Nyla. She hated what society had done to her family and she wanted someone to pay though had no idea who or how.
“Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I should have downplayed my relationship with your grandfather. He was my best friend, my companion, my love, and to this day, I miss him so much my heart aches. There is no way to describe to someone who hasn’t experienced the love of a soul mate what it feels like to have someone to share every intimate detail of your life. Living without a special person probably isn’t difficult for those who have never known any different, but I filled your mother’s head, and I fear yours, with great expectations. Men and women sharing life the way God intended is over, as well as being allowed to believe in God at all. You must forget about my past.”
Nyla knew exactly how her grandmother felt, but was embarrassed to admit that Ethan made her feel the same way. He was her friend, her companion and she cherished every moment they spent together. The thought of him being taken away from her was more than she could bear. She had been able to deal with all of the other disappointments in her life, but it was with his help that she had survived. If he were taken from her, who would help through the loss?
“No! No, it isn’t over Grandmother. Showing emotion, making choices and practicing religion may be prohibited, but it isn’t over. We are still human and we have the right to decide with whom we share our lives. We should be allowed to be angry, happy, or sad, even if those emotions disrupt the orderly balance. I won’t let it be over.”
“I know this is confusing, but you must try to conform. I tell you this for your own good.”
Nyla sat in stunned silence. She knew Ruby only wanted what was best for her, but her grandmother’s abrupt change in attitude and the loss of the photographs sent panic reeling through Nyla’s mind. She suddenly feared she was chasing a utopia that never had nor never would exist. Was the life she had convinced herself and her friends to go after even out there? Doubts roiled over as she ran to her room, threw herself down on her bed and cried.
Ruby shuffled out of the room, clicking off the radio as she went. Nyla could hear shrill beeps sounding from the kitchen, signaling her grandmother was preparing dinner. There were none of the wonderful smells her mother described from her time in Mexico. There was no clang of metal pots or the sizzling sound of frying food, only the dismal chime of the timer indicating their pre-packaged, nutritionally-balanced, government-approved, tasteless meals were ready.
The food was scientifically formulated to make people live longer healthier lives, but Nyla wasn’t sure why that was such a coveted concept. She also had a great deal of mistrust about what the meals actually contained. Claire had overheard her mother talking a few years back about a new formula being incorporated into all meals to prevent citizens from experiencing mood swings, keeping everyone on an even keel. They weren’t sure what was involved, but suspected all citizens were being drugged to keep them in an agreeable haze. After that, the guys had sneaked as much fresh food as they could to them, but it had only been enough to supplement their diets and had not enabled them to avoid the approved rations all together.
Ruby didn’t call when dinner was ready, she didn’t need to. The alarms could be heard throughout the small house. Nyla had no appetite. She seldom did because the food was so bland and she had no desire to have her mood altered. Despite her lack of appetite, Nyla dried her tears and went to the kitchen. She sat across from Ruby but didn’t look up, afraid her grandmother would see she had been crying. She was ashamed and angry, and the more Nyla thought about her grandmother’s resignation, the more her temper soared.
Microchips and radio frequency identification tags were implanted in every American’s palm and the people embraced the concept when it was presented as a replacement to social security cards, credit cards, cash, keys and driver’s licenses. Crime was virtually non-existent and lawsuits a thing of the past. But, the proudest accomplishment claimed by the politicians was the end to border problems. The politicians claimed that savvy U.S. foreign policy and technology stemmed the tide of Mexicans flooding the borders, but Nyla knew differently. Letters Crystal received from family in Mexico told the truth. Mexican citizens simply no longer wanted to come to America and those already there like Crystal, dreamed of going home.
As Nyla sat across from her grandmother and ate in silence, her mind drifted to the cliffs overlooking the Rio Bravo. Thinking about retracing her m
other’s footsteps helped Nyla subdue her anger and disappointment at losing her grandmother’s photographs and to focus on the future.
“I’m sorry I got so upset, it was childish. In this house, you have the freedom to do anything you wish with your belongings. I had no right to question your actions.”
“I’m relieved you understand. I just want you to be happy and how can you if imprisoned?”
“I’m not sure if I even know what it means to be happy. To most of society happiness has become synonymous with an uncomplicated existence, but that’s not enough for me.”
“I’m sure it’s not. Like your mother, you are definitely a complicated woman.”
“Is that such a bad thing?” Nyla whispered sheepishly.
A hint of a smile creased Ruby’s thin lips. She reached into the front pocket of her blouse, pulled out a small ragged photograph, and gazed at it lovingly. “Here, I saved just one and I want you to have it, but you must never be caught with it.”
Nyla accepted the photograph and gazed at the picture. Her grandparents were sitting on a colorful quilt under a huge tree. Ruby was holding a baby Nyla knew instantly was her mother. Ruby’s head rested on her grandfather’s chest and both had smiles unlike anything Nyla could ever remember seeing on her grandmother’s lips. Two small children with beaming smiles stood nearby and the family looked so happy and natural Nyla had to look away to keep from crying.
“Thank you, Grandmother. I’ll cherish this forever.”
CHAPTER NINE
Claire sneaked through the front door, thoughts swirling through her mind. There was a lot to think about and she didn’t want to be distracted by another fight with her mother. Her mother usually retired to her room early and Claire hoped tonight would be no exception.
“Where have you been?” Katherine demanded.
Claire’s hopes crumbled. Slowly turning to face the fuming woman, she gazed at her mother and for a brief moment felt sorry for her. She had never been loved so she had no idea how to love her own daughter. But any warm feelings quickly faded as Claire noted the look on her mother’s face—there was no concern in her expression, only impatience, fury and mistrust.
“I’m talking to you. Answer me!”
Claire’s anger soared as the hateful tone of her mother’s voice reached her ears. She wished she could feel some positive connection toward her mother, but all she could feel was the chill between them and the cold embrace of a loveless home.
“Out with friends.”
“I figured that much, but I asked where?”
“Nyla and I drove up to the overlook for a little peace and quiet, but I can tell there will be no more solitude tonight,” Claire snapped.
“I don’t want you associating with her or those farmers anymore. Do you understand me?”
“Not really. They’ve been my friends all my life, why start over now?”
“You’re an adult, almost done with your career prep program and eligible to apply for your own quarters soon, but those farm boys will be going away soon, so you might as well break away from them now. Nyla is a bad influence. With a mother like hers, she’ll never get a good job. She’ll be lucky to work at that dreadful coffee shop her mother had before taking up a life of crime. You could work for SLIC, like me, but you must distance yourself from people like her. And those males, we have absolutely no use for their kind in our well-structured society.”
Claire suddenly had a nearly uncontrollable urge to slap her mother. She didn’t know where the desire had come from. Violence in any form, physical or verbal, toward another person was strictly prohibited. Violent release was only allowed through video games. Claire took a deep breath and tried to regain control over her emotions.
“I don’t want to manipulate peoples’ lives like you and the rest of the clones at SLIC. I want to do something meaningful. I want to make life happier and more exciting for people.”
“Excitement is highly overrated and dangerous, and everything in furtherance of our nation’s agenda is meaningful. Policies are set for the good of all citizens, whether they see it or not. When people are allowed to make their own choices, they generally choose poorly. There were times when homeless people loitered in towns, law-abiding citizens were mugged, our borders were besieged by foreigners, children were kidnapped, our environment degraded and unwanted babies were up for adoption.”
“You’re right mother, we don’t get mugged anymore because we have nothing to take,” Claire hissed as she waved her left palm in front of her mother’s face.
“Get a hold of yourself, Claire. You sound like a crazy person.” Katherine grabbed her flailing hand and held it firmly.
Claire stepped closer and glared at her mother with burning intensity. “No one gets kidnapped because we have invasive tracking devices under our skin, but we aren’t free to move about our own country without setting off alarms as we travel across state borders. And no, there are no unwanted babies because you have to prove your loyalty to this screwed up society for the privilege of enough sperm for one. What if someone wants more than one child? What if I would love to have a sister or a brother? What if having a dad or a husband doesn’t sound repulsive to me?” Claire cried as tears streamed down her cheeks.
“Listen to me. This is the reason I don’t want you to associate with Nyla. I have no doubt you are getting these foolish ideas from her. Your grandmother never had a husband and obviously I haven’t and we’ve had fulfilled lives. I don’t understand why you don’t find comfort in knowing the authorities are there for you in every aspect of your life. You don’t have to worry about health care or being in an accident and no one finding you. With your chip, someone will always come for you. It’s like having an all-knowing being looking over your shoulder at all times to guide you and protect you.”
“People used to call that mighty being, ‘God’.”
The slap was so quick, Claire hadn’t seen it coming. She reached for her cheek and staggered back, stopped only by her mother’s iron hold on her wrist. Her mother had never struck her before and the shock left her speechless.
“Don’t ever say that word in this house again.”
Claire continued to stare at her mother, confusion and anger burning in her eyes. She watched as the color drained from the irate woman’s cheeks.
“I shouldn’t have struck you. It’s such an uncivilized act and strictly prohibited, but you know religion is illegal and I won’t allow you to shame this household. We don’t have to rely on a mystical being for guidance and comfort. We have the government to see to all of our needs.”
“But I’m lonely and if I give up my friends I will be all alone.”
“Nonsense—statistics confirm a career and a child will be sufficient for an average adult female to find fulfillment.”
“Average? Sufficient? Don’t you see anything sad about those goals?”
“Not at all. Wanting anything more than average is selfish and anything more than sufficient is greedy. When those two traits were allowed to proliferate, and in many instances were rewarded, society nearly collapsed. Selfish greed in a community is dangerous.”
Claire stared at her mother. She couldn’t understand how two women from the same house could have such opposing views on life. All of the things her mother found such comfort in, Claire found terrifying.
“I guess I see it as ambition, not selfish greed, and it’s only dangerous when there is no moral fiber left in a society.”
“I can only guess where you came up with that nonsense,” Katherine huffed, while rolling her eyes in frustration.
Claire supposed many of her thoughts and dreams were spawned by stories filtered down through Nyla’s mother and grandmother, but she only felt gratitude to them for showing her that life hadn’t been as bad as the politicians and her mother tried to claim.
“I just want what’s best for you and our country. If we all behave according to the rules, we’ll live dependable, comfortable lives. Your friend Nyla will never
feel content because she has her mother’s rebellious seed. She will probably end up in the Facility as well, which would be best for society since she spreads discontent. And those males have a different destiny,” Katherine stated as she released her daughter’s wrist and stepped back.
Claire’s thoughts fixed on Jared and she wanted to know the truth. She was afraid for his and Ethan’s future since no one knew for sure what that was. The uncertainty drove her to push her mother on the issue.
“What destiny? Claire demanded. “Men never come back here. Where do they go and what happens to them when they leave here, Mother?”
“That doesn’t need to concern you.”
“I want to know, Mother. Tell me the truth. If you want me to understand you and the life you embrace you have to be honest with me.”
“Hmm,” Katherine hesitated. She wasn’t sure how much she dare share, but she wanted Claire to accept her future and break free of her less than desirable companions. Claire had to understand the authorities were only doing what was best for the citizens. “It’s more of a federal issue than a state issue, but I do know that males report to one of three occupational categories. Many men work in the factories in the central manufacturing zone on the East Coast, others volunteer for the military and the rest participate in science. All are noble contributions to our collective cause.”
“I don’t even want to know what it means to participate in science or I fear I will never be able to speak to you again, but why would any man agree to join the military and protect this country when they have so few opportunities in society?”
“Well, if they successfully complete their military obligation they are allowed to retire and live anywhere they want. They can even go home if they wish.”
“But they never do, Mother. They never come home. Are we murdering our men?”