by Kim McMahill
CHAPTER TWELVE
Nyla held her breath and passed her palm across the eye of the scanner, hoping her bandage wouldn’t interfere with the reading. The gate to the Facility eased open and she exhaled. She reached the next door, stared into the retinal scanner, pressed her thumb into the mold and waited while the heavy barrier slowly opened.
The walk down the dank hallway seemed longer than usual. She knew it was her imagination, but couldn’t fight the feelings of claustrophobia. Sweat beaded at her temples despite the cold interior and her heartbeat raced. Nyla didn’t know if the nerves came from the fear of having her chip removal discovered or from knowing it might be the last time she ever saw her mother. Taking several deep breaths, she emerged into view of the monitor, waited to be acknowledged, and then went to the visiting room to wait for her mother.
Nyla heard the door open and looked up as her mother slowly shuffled into the room. Her jumpsuit hung off her bony frame, making the once beautiful, proud, athletic woman look unbearably tiny and forlorn. Nyla swallowed hard to push the lump in her throat down and pasted a smile on her lips.
“How are you doing, Mother? You look tired.”
“I’m fine. I just haven’t been sleeping well. I’ve been dreaming about Carlos and Daniel a lot since we last talked. They’re not bad dreams, but still painful and so very real. The Facility physicians have been providing medication to help me sleep, but I haven’t been taking the pills. Who knows what they’re actually giving me. Their answer to maintaining order is to keep all the prisoners so drugged up we can barely think or move, much less cause trouble.”
The deep dark lines beneath Rachel’s eyes concerned Nyla. Her mother had always been trim and fit, but throughout the years in the Facility, her weight had diminished to a point where her skin hung loosely at her cheeks and arms, and its tone held the gray pallor of death. All her muscle tone had been eaten away by inactivity and the sparkle in her eyes had been extinguished.
“I wish I could know my half-brother. I’m lonely a lot. I don’t know why everyone thinks the one-child policy is so great. Our country isn’t crowded. In fact, according to the latest census, our population is in a steep decline.”
“You’re too free-spirited to accept restrictions without question which concerns me. I want you to be happy but I don’t want you to end up here. Though, maybe we could finally spend some time together.”
Rachel’s smile was weak. Nyla appreciated her attempt to lighten the mood, but they were too much alike to hide anything from each other. She loathed seeing her mother suffer guilt for their situation. Grandmother Ruby was treated like an outcast. Nyla had been shunned because her mother had been labeled a criminal, but it hadn’t bothered her much. She was proud of her mother and grateful she had cared enough to try to provide her with a better life.
Nyla tried to talk about her studies. The topic was safe, but when Nyla thought about school, she couldn’t help but think about how close Ethan was to being done and about how differently he had been treating her lately.
“You know Ethan only has one term left.”
“He’s grown into a very handsome man. I like him very much and wish we all lived in a different time. I know it’s going to be difficult when you’re no longer able to see each other as much.”
“It doesn’t have to be that way.”
Rachel sensed her daughter was conflicted, but was hesitant to ask what was on her mind. Whatever had Nyla in such an unusual mood was most likely something that shouldn’t be talked about near potentially preying ears, but she just couldn’t brush her daughter off when she was clearly reaching out to her.
“You seem torn about something. Do you want to talk about it?” Rachel cautiously asked, while glancing sideways at the woman playing video games behind the glass window.
“Mother, you don’t know how much I wish I could. I’m just afraid a lot. Afraid I’m being selfish or making the wrong decisions. I’m sad I may not see the people who mean the most to me again, even if I think those people will understand and support my decisions,” Nyla said as she reached over and ran her palm affectionately down her mother’s arm.
Rachel flinched at the scratchy sensation she felt on her arm. Her mind reeled through the last few conversations she had with her daughter and everything made perfect sense. She and her daughter were so much alike and there was nothing she could do at this point to change that fact, even if she wanted to.
Trepidation and excitement made Rachel sit straight in her chair and her focus drifted. Nyla had grown up and she had missed it, and now her daughter was faced with a tough decision. She hadn’t been there for Nyla, but Ethan, Jared and Claire had. She knew her daughter was too strong-willed to let go of any of them without a fight, especially Ethan. Rachel understood how special he was to Nyla, and from personal experience, she was aware of how powerful those feelings could be in influencing a woman’s actions.
“Mother, are you okay? Please look at me.”
Their eyes connected and Nyla was certain her mother knew everything. She wanted her mother’s approval to be sure she was making the right decision about her future.
“Nyla, it’s time you move on and forget about me. I’m the past and you still have options. Though I love seeing you and cherish our time together, I don’t think you should come here anymore. This is no place for a young mind to spend time. This is a horrible depressing dungeon you shouldn’t have to experience. You haven’t missed a single Sunday since I was incarcerated, but it’s time to stop this madness and look forward.”
Nyla wasn’t surprised by her mother’s words and it gave her a great sense of relief. The thought of never seeing her mother again was painful, but she now felt one step closer to her goal. Rachel had given Nyla her blessing to try to alter the course of her future.
“Are you sure this is what you want? Are you sure this is what I should do?”
“It’s not necessarily what I want, but what I believe is best for you. Seeing you makes me hunger for freedom that is out of reach. Seeing your grown-up face only reminds me how I failed you. You deserve more.”
“Don’t say that, Mother. I’m proud of you. You were just caught in the middle. You were in the generation who knew too much about the past to accept the future without question.”
“I’m glad you understand. I also want you to know your grandmother only wants what’s best for you too. She’s old, she’s had some good times, and those memories have sustained her through the years. She wouldn’t want you to make decisions about your future based on her.”
“Thank you,” Nyla mumbled, trying to suppress the tears.
“Five minutes,” came the harsh voice from behind the glass.
Nyla pulled herself together. She wanted to make the most of their remaining minutes and not leave with sadness in the air.
“Tell me something, Mother. If you could tell Carlos one thing what would it be?”
Rachel fell silent as her mind reeled through all her memories of him and a smile came to her lips. There were so many happy visions and so many things she wished she could say to him. She had treasured the few notes Nyla had smuggled to her, but she had responded only once for fear of being caught, only to explain to him why she would not be replying again. Rachel had nothing to lose, but she couldn’t take chances with Nyla’s freedom.
“I would tell him to take care of my babies and that I loved him until the day I died.”
Her mother’s choice of words set her back. For a moment, Nyla was unable to speak or breathe and then the buzzer blared, signaling their time was up.
“Wrap it up,” the woman behind the glass stated and then resumed her game.
Nyla stood and hugged her mother tight, pulling her close. She held on, afraid to let go, knowing it would be the last time. She vaguely heard another warning from the woman behind the glass reminding her of the regulation prohibiting such contact, but Nyla couldn’t let go.
“I love you, Mother,” she whispered into Rachel�
��s ear. “Goodbye.”
“I love you too.”
Two women in uniform rushed into the room, each grabbing one of Nyla’s arms and pulling her away from her mother. As Nyla drew away, she ran her palm gently down her mother’s cheek, wiping away a tear that had just begun to fall.
Rachel watched her daughter with pride as Nyla was escorted out of the visiting room. She looked confident and determined as she pulled away from the guards and showed herself out. Rachel knew for sure, by the feel of her daughter’s palm, that she would never see her girl again. The realization didn’t bring her sadness, only relief. A huge weight had been lifted. At last, she was free to rid herself of this hell that had become her life.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Ethan had avoided his mother for two days, but his luck had just run out. He and Jared had been trying to gather survival gear and a few essential tools, which had taken him all over the farm and provided too many opportunities to cross paths with her. By the time he saw Vera approaching it was too late to turn and leave.
“Ethan, have you been avoiding me?”
He had never minced words with his mother or played games with her. He doubted they’d ever played games even when he was a baby since he was raised by Jared’s mother.
“Actually, yes, I have been avoiding you. Leah said you had something for me. I’m not stupid. Anything that comes by special courier can only be bad news.”
“You’re such a cynic. It’s probably that girl you’ve always hung around. If you were a daughter I would have forbidden you to associate with Rachel Ward’s daughtershe’s a malcontent. I’m sure Nyla will end up in the Facility just like her mother, but don’t worry, you’ll be long gone by then so you won’t have to see your little friend locked up.”
Ethan couldn’t believe how cold his mother had always treated him. He was never a son to herhe was simply free farm labor. He promised himself he would just ignore her, but she always seemed to goad him into responding.
“So, since I have no future in this society, you didn’t think it would matter if I hung around that ‘bad Ward girl’ and became corrupted by her rebellious ways?”
“Sometimes I wonder why I chose a male child when I could have had a daughter who wouldn’t question everything,” Vera stated, rolling her eyes. “But, no, I don’t worry about her corrupting you since you’re too stubborn to be influenced by anything or anyone.”
The statement brought a crooked smile to Ethan’s lips. His mother sounded resigned to the fact that Nyla was part of his life. It was a tiny victory, but still gave him a sense of triumph.
“You are so exasperating, but you’ve been a hard worker and have never gotten into any trouble with the authorities and I guess that’s all I could’ve hoped for in a male child.”
“Stop, Mother, you’re making me blush with all the flattery.”
She shook her head and sighed. “I don’t want to talk about Nyla or listen to your sass. I have good news. You’ve received your donation notice. At your age this is very flattering.”
“How can you say it’s good or flattering? I find this whole system disturbing.”
“The fact your genetics are in demand is a positive reflection on you as well as me, but I figured you would see this in a negative light. I actually don’t care how you feel about it. Just go to the clinic with this letter and fulfill your obligation. If you don’t show up, you’ll be leaving your little friend sooner than you anticipated.” Vera held the summons out toward him.
Ethan made no move toward it. He refused to make anything easy for her and couldn’t wait until she had to run this place without him. He didn’t flinch when Vera stuffed the paper in his front shirt pocket, he just glared at her until she turned and stomped away.
“Your attitude is so maddening. No wonder men’s status has sunk to such a low level. Soon science will eliminate the need for your kind altogether and that will be a glorious day.”
“What was that, Mother? Did you say you’ll miss me and all the hard work I do around here when the authorities ship me away?”
She stopped and turned around. Ethan could see he had pushed her further than he ever had before and he took great satisfaction in being the cause of her anger.
“Actually, as trying and infuriating as you can be, I was considering asking for an extension after you graduated in order to keep you on the farm a bit longer, but now I think I’ll just let you go and you’ll see how good you had it here once you reach your destiny.”
“Remember Jared isn’t far behind. Man, I’d actually play a mind-numbing video game for the chance to see one of my communal-sisters pull a pissed-off snake out of a pipe.”
Ethan watched her stomp away, thankful not all women had become so cold and heartless. He felt fortunate to know women like Nyla, Rachel, Ruby, Crystal, Claire and at times, even Leah. The kind and resourceful women in his life gave him a sliver of hope for a different future than the one planned for him by the authorities. He was more determined than ever to make sure Nyla and Claire were part of the future he craved—he would settle for nothing less.
“So, was it what we thought?” Jared asked, pointing to the letter in Ethan’s pocket.
“Yep. I’m supposed to report the day after tomorrow for my civic duty. Good thing we’ll be long gone by then. I do not intend to donate anything to this messed up society. Call me old fashioned, but if I ever decide to reproduce it will be the old-fashioned way. From what I understand it was a lot more interesting.”
Jared laughed. “Growing up we heard about having to donate and kind of feared the time when it would happen to one of us, but now that it has it just sounds ridiculous.”
“You think this is funny? I think it’s sick and I want no part of it.”
“I think your reaction is funny, but I’m just glad it’s you man, not me.” Jared slapped Ethan on the back. “Come on, Leah gave us a list of stuff to get from town. It’ll give us a chance to meet up with the girls and maybe we can slip in a few extra items at the store we might need.”
“Good. I want to make sure nothing gets in the way of our plan, like me being thrown in the Facility for accidentally hitting Vera with a shovel. If I have to see that woman who claims to be my mother again, I may do something out of character for our kinder and gentler society.”
Ethan crumpled the letter and tossed it in the nearest trashcan. He put an arm loosely around Jared’s shoulders and headed toward the truck, the thought of seeing Nyla and Claire instantly lifting his spirits.
“You drive.” Ethan tossed the keys at Jared.
“Probably best, as mad as you are I doubt your mind is on the road right now.”
Ethan grabbed the door handle and opened it. He loved the old truck. He liked the feel of still opening his own door and sliding a key into the ignition. He had no desire to have a conversation with his vehicle every time he wanted to go somewhere. If he was in a mood to mumble and grumble he didn’t want to be forced to enunciate just so some artificial intelligence chip could understand what it was supposed to do. The sensual aspects of day-to-day tasks had all but disappeared and he couldn’t wait to feel, hear and smell life, and live it on his own terms.
Jared gunned the motor and sent dust billowing into the sky as he fishtailed out of the drive. Ethan knew if Vera was still in sight they’d hear about it when they got back, but he didn’t care. Vera would think Jared’s driving was hard on the equipment and reminiscent of rebellious times that wouldn’t be tolerated under her regime.
“There may be hope for you after all,” Ethan howled as he slugged Jared on the arm.
Jared returned Ethan’s punch as they wove down the dirt track leading to the highway. Jared was at a disadvantage having only one hand to swing at his friend, but since they were only throwing mock punches, it didn’t really matter. What mattered was they were together and they planned to stay that way forever.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The moment Ethan and Jared walked into the cave’s cand
lelit heart, Nyla could sense something was wrong and panic shot through her body. Ethan’s angular jaw was set and his long stride determined. His fists hung clenched at his sides and fire burned in his dark eyes. He looked dangerous, but his intensity didn’t scare Nyla it only made her want to reach out to him.
“What is it? Is everything okay?”
“Ethan is just a little put off by his summons to donate to the physical perfection of the next generation of conformists,” Jared joked.
“What! I thought that didn’t happen until after graduation. How could they summon him now? How much time do we have? We can’t let this happen. We can leave tonight.”
Nyla didn’t mean to sound hysterical, but feared she had. She didn’t know why the thought of Ethan fathering unknown numbers of children with unknown women, whom he would never meet, should bother her so much, but it did.
Ethan put his arms around Nyla and pulled her close and rested his chin on the top of her head. Her reaction was just the response he wanted and needed. He was relieved to see he wasn’t the only one who thought the mandatory donation policy was wrong. Knowing Nyla cared so much made his anger dissipate and he only wanted to comfort her.
“Don’t worry. I’m not scheduled until the day after tomorrow and we’ll be long gone by then,” he whispered into her ear as he continued to hold her tight.
Nyla opened her eyes and could see Claire and Jared watching them with amusement, but neither said anything to break Ethan’s hold. She was sure Ethan’s action looked odd to their friends, but she was glad they said nothing, knowing it would only make him uncomfortable. And, Nyla enjoyed the feel of Ethan’s embrace and was in no hurry to end the contact.
When Ethan released Nyla, he walked over to the flame. His friends gathered around him, but he refused to look any of them in the eye, afraid his feelings could still be read. He buried his emotions the only way he knew howby taking charge.