“There really is nothing to tell, Camila. I asked him if I could take your hours next Friday and he said no. You’re both making a huge deal out of something very small.”
Her lips twist so one corner of her mouth is pointed up and the other is laying flat. “If you say so. But I’ve never known you to get quiet over something as small as hours. You know we’re both here for you if you need anything.”
I nod again and when she holds out her arms, I give her a hug. Unfortunately, what I need, they can’t give me. Peace of mind is going to be hard to find. Until I know more about Darren and what he wants, I’m going to be watching over my shoulder.
As I let Camila go, Hawk steps out from his office and watches us intently. I think it’s me he’s studying, but when Camila moves away, his gaze follows. I’m not sure what it all means until he wraps his massive arms over his chest again and calls for Camila. He tells Jonus and I to go ahead home and he’ll see that Camila makes it back safe.
“So that’s his game,” Jonus says after we leave the restaurant and begin walking the eight blocks to our apartment.
“Who’s game?” My brain is still so focused on Darren, I’m sure I missed the part where Jonus explained what he’s talking about.
He shoves my shoulder with his. “Hawk and Camila, silly. Don’t tell me you didn’t feel the heat when he asked her to stay behind? I’m sure they are getting nasty on his couch in the office right about now.”
“Gross,” I spit out. But the picture in my head isn’t gross at all. It’s painful and I’m suddenly full of jealousy. “Camila is dating someone.”
“Yeah.” Jonus steps in front of me, so he has to walk backward to face me. I don’t know where he gets his energy from, but after pulling a double he’s as fresh and as full of it as ever. “But she’s dating a rival and working for Hawk. You know he’s not going to stand for that under his own roof. Why do you think he won’t give her Friday off?”
“Because we’re swamped on the weekends right now.” I brush past Jonus. He may be full of energy, but I’m not. My head is beginning to spin so much that his theory is actually making sense.
Jonus laughs. “He can’t allow one of his employees to be with a Devil right now. Not after what’s happened over the last few weeks between the two clubs.” Jonus steps in front of me again and stops me with both of his hands on my shoulders. He catches my gaze before he speaks. “Camila told me next Friday is the initiation for the newest Devil members, and her mystery man is on that list. You know what that means.”
“I don’t know, and I don’t care either.” I push him off and keep walking. Only, I do have a pretty good idea where he’s going with his story. I don’t know much about how club life works, but I do know sex is akin to ownership, just like dogs peeing to mark their territory. Jonus believes Hawk is doing just that with Camila and judging by how many times Camila has told me she has a crush on Hawk, I’m sure that given the chance at him, she’d take it.
It all makes my stomach roll.
Jonus follows me the last two blocks without saying another word. It isn’t until we’re at the intersection between our street and a strip of neighborhood bars that he calls my name.
“Go home if you like, Lo, but I’m not ready to end my night just yet. You okay on your own?”
I snicker under my breath. I love Jonus like a brother but, if anything, I should be making sure he gets home safe.
“Go ahead.” I wave him off. “And don’t wake me when you come in. I have the early shift tomorrow.”
Jonus only smiles before he skips off to the center of the empty intersection. He turns and blows me a kiss before he’s off in the direction of his and Camila’s favorite Irish pub. Alone, I can’t stop picturing Camila with Hawk. It’s a crazy idea. Hawk made it clear when he hired me. He didn’t approve of employees dating each other or customers, and that included him. I’ve seen supermodel level women throw themselves at him and he hasn’t budged on the rule. Why Camila and why now?
I shake the idea out of my head. Once I’m in our apartment, I turn on the radio loud enough to drown out any possibility of dwelling on the idea. After a quick shower and getting into my pjs, I’m tucked cozily in bed and ready to call it a night when my phone dings.
I shouldn’t look. It’s probably Camila or Jonus. They are the only people who text this late. But it could also be Hawk wanting to apologize for tonight. That idea makes me laugh until I turn my phone over and four words from the private number pierce the quiet in my mind.
We need to talk.
Hawk
I’d hoped Camila knew something about what Lo is keeping from me. I know they aren’t as close as Camila and Jonus are, but they do talk.
Turns out the only information Camila knows—at last what she’s willing to share with me—is that Lo is upset I won’t let her take extra hours. The excuse sounds just as flimsy coming from Camila as it does from Lo.
After Camila spends another half an hour arguing about how badly she needs Friday off, I finally drop my guard and tell her the truth. If she wants to date a patched member of the Devils, she needs to find a new job and a new place to live. She tells me how unfair I’m being and that her guy isn’t one of the bad ones, but after last week, she’s lucky I haven’t fired her on the spot for her association with the enemy.
By the time I get Camila out of my office, it’s late. I think about finally pouring myself that drink I’ve been after all night, but I don’t like the idea of a foggy brain tonight. If Bear calls us members into the clubhouse for an emergency meeting, I want to be ready.
That leaves me with the option of retiring upstairs to my apartment above the restaurant to rub one out to images of Lo. I know how sick that makes me. I can’t ever have her, but I can’t get her out of my head.
Tonight isn’t any different. When I close my eyes, I see her light brown eyes near tears from the anger she held back, and her cheeks so blushed I thought she’d explode on me. But she didn’t. As Lo always does, she kept complete control of herself and she avoided telling me the real reason she sent me that text.
I can’t shake the feeling she’s in some kind of trouble. But that doesn’t explain why she came to me and then clammed up. I’ve always told my girls that whatever they need, I’m here.
Lo and I have shared a few stories here and there over closing time drinks. I know her father died when she was young and her mother is a big yogi hippy, as she calls her, without much of a maternal instinct. Lo mostly raised herself and that has made her equal parts strong and independent. She can handle herself, which is why I like having her on the floor watching out for the others when I’m not there. But she’s also solitary to the point that she doesn’t allow anyone in.
That’s the part that has me grabbing my jacket off the peg and stepping outside. I’m halfway to their apartment before I even realize where I’m walking. I don’t know why I’m going there. Maybe just to have a look around the place. Or I need to clear my head and the apartment is on my route around the neighborhood. I do own it, along with two others in the same complex. They are investment properties, and I rent them to my workers when I can.
I like the idea of Lo living with Jonus. He’s hitting for the other team, so he’s not a threat, yet he’s strong as a fucking ox. And when he’s not drunk on my liquor, he’s a damn good opponent.
I've convinced myself I’m only feeling guilty for being an ass to Camila when I reach the apartment building. It’s the stress and fatigue from the last several days talking. Coupled with little sleep and the spell Lo puts on me whenever she’s near, I’ve concocted an entire scenario in my head that’s not true. Fuck. I still need that drink. And I need to get laid. One of the sweet butts might take my mind off Lo for long enough to get my head clear. Then I laugh at myself. A week ago, when I stood with my Glock drawn and ready to either take down a man or be taken down by another, the only thought on my mind past my military training was how Lo would feel if I died.
She’d
lose her boss, maybe even her home, but would that be where the sadness ended for her?
Does she care about me? I shake my head. I’m one screwed up motherfucker, and I should have had that drink instead of taking a walk. I need sleep more than I need to stand outside her place like a sicko stalker.
I turn and start for the restaurant when my cell buzzes in my pocket. I’ve been waiting all night for a message from Bear. He promised he’d call Church if he had any news to share on last week’s shooting.
As I pull my phone from my pocket, I’m struck by an overwhelming feeling it could be another late-night text from Lo. I’m actually hoping for it. It’s not. Bear’s called a meeting for the morning, meaning I need to get home and try to get some sleep.
Tomorrow will be busy with meetings, club business, and a check-in at the restaurant. Lo’s working the early crowd, so I’ll make sure to wait until after her shift to make an appearance. I’ve tempted fate enough. We’re both better off if I just stay the hell out of her way.
Chapter 3
Lotus
I’m helping clean the pizza oven and prep the lunch service while I yawn every time I take a breath.
“Late night?” India asks. She’s engaged to one of Hawk’s club brothers and only works the lunch shift a few days a week. She’s easy to work with and mostly keeps to herself, which works well for me.
“Jonus didn’t get in until four and I couldn’t fall asleep. I guess I was waiting up for him.” Not to mention the cryptic text I’m sure came from Darren that kept me up until dawn.
India laughs. “I’m pretty sure if the situation was reversed, Jonus wouldn’t lose any sleep over you.”
She’s exactly right, which is why Darren’s texts are so unsettling. No one here knows my history. No one would lose sleep if I disappeared for a while. That’s what makes telling Hawk the truth so important, but I couldn't get the words out last night.
“Have you seen Hawk?” I ask India. I still haven’t worked up the nerve to tell him I’m being stalked, but I know, for the safety of the rest of the workers, I should.
“He wasn’t at the clubhouse when I left this morning. Are you sure he didn’t stay here last night?”
I swallow the thick ball that forms in my throat. Now that she mentioned it, I’m pretty sure he did. And he had company. “Maybe. He and Camila were having words when I left. Maybe she stayed over.”
India’s brows scrunch together. She’s the one who’s told me in the past that Hawk doesn't hang around the sweet butts like most of the other unattached members do. She lives in the clubhouse with Scout for now, until they find a place of their own, and she always has the latest gossip.
“That doesn’t sound like Hawk.”
“I wouldn't believe it either, but I saw it with my own eyes.”
India doesn’t respond. She gives me a stumped look, then goes back to marrying the shakers of red pepper flakes and parmesan cheese.
It’s not until just before my shift ends that Camila walks into the restaurant. It’s her day off, but I’m pretty sure work isn’t what she’s after.
“Have you seen Jonus?” she asks me when she takes a stool at the bar. The crowd is in between the lunch and dinner rush, so there are plenty of seats.
I stop clearing the table next to her to answer. “Not since early this morning. He stopped off at that bar you guys like before coming home and I heard him come in pretty late.”
Camila glances at her cell in her hand. She must have been up early to get out of Hawk’s place before I came in to open up. I’d assumed she’d been back to the apartment to freshen up and would have run into Jonus there. Or maybe Hawk had taken her to the club. Maybe he’d shown her off to the membership. I could understand him wanting to gloat after stealing a Devil’s ol’lady right out from under them.
“That’s odd,” Camila's voice cuts into my thoughts. “We were supposed to meet up for lunch today. He was going to help me pick something out to wear to Joe’s initiation party next week.”
“He might be still passed out. Have you tried the apartment?” I finish with the table and carry the bussing tub to the next while Camila turns on her stool to follow.
“I haven’t had time.” She holds up her hand to show off her new nails. “Got a pedi too. It was time.”
I bet it was. I have to get her and Hawk out of my mind before it drives me crazy.
“Have you seen Hawk?” I ask. No luck getting him off my mind ever.
“No.” She shakes her head, still studying her nails. “Not since last night. Why?”
“No reason.” Though I can’t stop from smirking. Camila is a horrible liar. That’s why she’s had so much trouble getting what she wants from Hawk. He reads her like a book. I wish he could read me the same way. Then I wouldn’t have to work so hard to ask him for help.
“Well, if you see Jonus, tell him I’m going to kill him when I find him.” She hops off the stool and makes for the door. “I’m going to check the apartment first before I call the police to find him.” She laughs, so I know she’s kidding, but a rush of something cold crashes over my skin.
No. Darren wouldn’t mess with Jonus. He’s too smart to arouse suspicions by showing himself to my roommates. He only wants to talk. He’s not that stupid.
“Lotus,” Camila shouts my full name and I turn to her, my blood shooting through my veins and my heart beating hard against my chest. “Where did you go? I called your name three times. Jonus just sent me a text. He’s on his way over and he has something for you.”
“Something for me?” I have no idea what it could be, unless it’s another bill in the mail. Those always seem to find me and no one else has my address.
“Don’t know,” she says and opens the door. “I guess you’ll find out when he gets here.”
She’s out the door and down the sidewalk before I can ask her to text Jonus for specifics. It doesn’t matter because the door swings open again seconds later and its Hawk. His gaze catches mine for a second before he turns away and doesn’t look back. He’s behind his office doors before I can even say “hey.”
I really pissed him off yesterday. Either that or he knows Jonus and I figured out what happened with him and Camila. Either way, talking with him now is out of the question. I’m going to keep my secret to myself.
It’s almost time for the dinner rush and well after the end of my shift when Jonus finally arrives. He’s in a rush to get his personal stuff stowed behind the bar and to get to work before Hawk catches him showing up late. Again.
I let him catch his breath and get the bar sorted before I clock out for the day and take one of the empty stools.
“You had a late night,” I say, pulling over a stack of drink napkins and straightening them for Jonus.
“An early morning is more like it,” he says with a silly grin. “You have no idea the fun you missed.”
“I’m sure.” Anything would have been better than laying in my bed, fully awake, and still dreaming of Hawk. There’s one question I’ve never asked him. I’ve never had the nerve too. Unlike his brothers, Hawk doesn’t have any tattoos. At least, not any that I can see. Maybe that’s why when I daydream about him, I always picture him in a tank top and jeans.
“Earth to Lo.”
Jonus snaps his fingers in my face and I realize I’m doing it again. “Sorry,” I mutter. “What were you saying?”
Jonus already has a drink order. He’s filling mugs from the tap and talking simultaneously. “You got a letter in the mail today. Handwritten and a Kentucky address. I thought it might be family, so I bought it with me. It’s in my satchel.”
I can’t leave my stool even though Jonus is bobbing his head in the direction of his leather bag behind the bar. Other than my mother, I don’t know anyone left in Kentucky and even she doesn’t have my address.
“Thanks,” I say when Jonus continues to stare at me. “Probably an old high school friend,” I hedge.
Jonus goes back to his drink order and I sli
p behind the bar, grab the letter from his bag, and make my way to the dark hallway that leads past Hawk’s office and to the restrooms. No one is back here, so I stop and flip the baby-blue-colored envelope over in my hand. It’s addressed to me, at the apartment complex, but it looks as if someone has penciled in the apartment number.
The return address is my mother’s house. Or at least it was the last time I spoke with her six months ago. I’ve never told her where I live past the city. Did she send Darren to find me? I have so many questions. I glance around to make sure I’m alone before I break the seal and pull out a card with a puppy blowing out birthday candles. The inside says “Happy Birthday” and it’s signed “Darren.”
My birthday was last week. An ice-cold shiver runs through me at the same time a hand comes down over my right shoulder. I would have screamed, but I couldn’t find my voice. Instead, I drop the card and turn, ready to fight.
“Whoa there, Lo.”
Hawk squares his body to mine and stares at me with his hands in the air and shock on his face. He backs up a step as if giving me room.
“What’s going on with you?”
I’m frozen in place, but as soon as he makes a move for the card, I find my bearings again and reach for it first. “Nothing. It’s nothing. Just a card. From a friend.”
Hawk’s head tilts to the side. He glances down to my hands and he reads the card. “I didn’t know it was your birthday. Funny. That should be on the staff calendar in the office.”
“It’s not.” I stumble over my words to answer. When I applied for this job, I used my grandmother’s social security number and birthday so I couldn’t be tracked. “I’m not big on birthday celebrations.”
He nods at the card in my hand. “Well, someone remembered.”
“My mom,” I hedge, regretting it the second I say it.
Hawk’s brows furrow. “You two are talking again? That’s good.”
Hawk: Tempest Elite MC: Tempest Elite MC Book # 5 Page 2