Fast Lane (SEAL Team Alpha Book 16)

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Fast Lane (SEAL Team Alpha Book 16) Page 15

by Zoe Dawson


  The feverish intensity between them was sizzling hot, the strength and power of her arousal making her knees weak.

  “Ford,” she whispered.

  He slanted his mouth across hers and sank his tongue deep, kissing her with a recklessness he had never shown her before. He was always so careful with her, it was maddening. His mouth promised sin and unrestrained passion, and she matched him stroke for stroke, chasing his tongue with her own, letting him know that she wanted everything he could give her.

  With his lips still devouring her mouth with aggressive, utterly devastating kisses, she shivered and moaned as his big, warm hands closed around her breasts, rubbing and massaging them, then rolled her hard, sensitive nipples between his fingers. He broke their kiss, lowered his head, and closed his mouth over her taut, aching breast. He laved her nipple with his tongue before nipping with his teeth, then sucked her strong and deep, until she felt the same seductive, pulling sensation in the pit of her belly. An electric jolt zapped through her, exploding in heated ripples that thrummed across her nerve endings.

  Her skin tingled everywhere, hot and alive with sensation. She twined her fingers in his soft, thick hair, feeling breathless and dizzy and unable to do anything but hold on, let him have his way with her body, and give in to the wild, pent-up passion that had been so absent from her life when she’d left him like a fool.

  He broke the kiss and abruptly stood, stripping off his shorts.

  She couldn’t help herself, her gaze dropping to his jutting erection. She rose and grabbed his hips turning him toward her, then slipped her hand around the velvet-textured length of him and felt him pulse in her grip. Her other hand clasped his smooth, taut ass. He made a guttural sound and arched his back. She had forgotten how truly magnificent her ex-husband was. Not much had changed.

  She rubbed her thumb over the tip of his cock, unable to stop herself from leaning forward and licking him, then taking him fully into her mouth. A low growl, encompassing intense pleasure and urgent need, rolled out of him, but she was lost in the carnal lust of having his hard, heated length in her mouth, against her tongue, tasting hot and salty.

  She sucked him, pleasured him with her mouth, teased him with her tongue, and aroused him to a fever pitch of need that made his entire body shake with the restraint of holding back.

  “Oh, fuck me,” he breathed. Before she could get more of him, he was pulling out of her mouth and pushing her down, pushing her legs wide apart, and he went to his knees. The feel of his hot, damp mouth on her inner thigh along with the scrape of his teeth and the swirl of his tongue made her cry out as he burned a sensuous path up to the pulsing, aching core of her.

  She moaned as he licked her in a hot, searing stroke, ruthless in giving her pleasure. He closed his warm, wet mouth over her and plunged his tongue deep. The pleasure was sharp and riveting and stole her breath. A low throbbing began in her belly, then spiraled down to her sex, and she grabbed handfuls of his hair, wanting more, needing more…

  The sleek, gliding pressure of his thumbs caressing her soft lips and stroking her rhythmically, combined with his wicked tongue working its own seductive magic, was the most erotic sensation she’d ever experienced. Unable to hold back, she let out another cry and arched sinuously against his mouth as she came in a burning wave that shook her entire body.

  Without giving her a chance to fully recover from her orgasm, he moved up over her, the slide of his muscled body against hers making her pulse leap higher and faster. She reached down to touch him, and when her fingers fluttered over the broad, velvet head of his shaft, he sucked in a hissing breath. Grasping both of her wrists, he pulled her arms up and pinned them above her head, giving him complete control of the situation.

  He settled more fully on top of her, his thighs forcing hers farther apart, and then he was pressing his erection intimately against her, nudging his way in, stretching her, setting her body on fire. She caught a glimpse of his dark, fierce expression before he crushed his mouth to hers and kissed her deeply, passionately as he buried his shaft to the hilt in her slick heat, possessing her completely.

  Their moans mingled, and once he began to move, there was no stopping him, and she instinctively knew there wasn’t going to be anything slow or gentle about this first joining. No, judging by the sexual energy and potent heat radiating off him, she prepared herself for a fast, hard, unrestrained ride.

  And that’s exactly what he gave her. He plunged into her, fast and deep and strong, a rich, seductive rhythm that pulsed as vitally as her heartbeat. His hips ground against hers with each driving, impaling thrust until she felt him go rigid and his lower body arched into her high and hard, pushing her up and over yet another crest. She came again in a blinding climax of intoxicating speed and delirious sensation.

  This time, so did he. A low growl erupted from his chest and vibrated against her lips as his body jerked violently against hers, and he finally succumbed to his own blistering orgasm.

  12

  Fast Lane woke to a darkened room and his ex-wife’s gorgeous naked body in his arms. His head was whirling in those first few moments of coming out of sleep. With her, he had found himself home in her arms.

  There were times when he really thought he could handle the future without Solace in it. But until he’d held her again, the suffocating waves of loneliness only seemed to increase every moment he was with her. He had no idea if this was temporary; he didn’t know how she felt. Had this been a sympathy fuck? He had lost it, and his throat worked at the shame of breaking down in front of anyone, but this was Solace, and she not only had been part of his life when he’d been married to her, but like a lovesick fool, he had pined for her ever since she’d booted him out of her life.

  Maybe he had hidden himself enough, the heavy mantle of leadership, of holding things back because he had taken an oath. It wasn’t until now he’d realized that there was a way to let go and share with her without revealing anything classified.

  Maybe that was all she needed. Him. Present, supportive, open. Definitely not the angry, protective a-hole he had been that fateful night they had argued and his world had crashed.

  He realized now that hers had, too, and he had no idea how she felt about it. Not really. He was such a self-centered, egotistical bastard that he wouldn’t even listen to what she was trying to tell him, that she had a job to do too. She was in the service too. She had sacrificed and worked hard to get where she was too. As far as he was concerned, it was all her fault, and when he hit the road, he vowed he would leave it all behind.

  What a fucktard he’d been.

  Attuned to her familiar weight in his arms before he even opened his eyes, he tried to control his beating heart, the longing for this moment to never end, for reality to recede.

  But he’d always been a realist.

  Mixed into the turmoil over Solace and making love to her was the punch of HM’s death, Dodger’s critical condition, Hemingway and Pitbull’s injuries, all of them out of the fight, hit him even harder at the memory of all that had happened. His single-minded, sanctioned mission to take Zasha into custody had manifested into the loss of three of his guys.

  Swallowing back the ache in his throat, he turned his wrist and looked at his watch. Only an hour had passed, and that wouldn’t be time enough to get any information. Besides, if Ruckus had some news, he would have called him on his cell.

  They had a while before they had to report for briefing. He would need to get to his paperwork. Eventually.

  She moved and Fast Lane shifted his head to look at her, lifting a stray strand that clung to her cheek. She was so beautiful, her features delicate and unique for such a strong-minded woman who garnered men’s attention and muscled helicopters around like they were an extension of her body. But part of her allure, he suspected, was the way she carried herself, the way she moved. She was tall with small breasts and a long, slender body—legs that went on forever. But it was how she moved with those legs, with the grace and powe
r of an athlete. He really enjoyed watching her walk and fly.

  * * *

  He'd never forget how she’d looked in that cockpit as that lethal black chopper powered up the side of the cliff, stomped that building with Hydras, then as they peeled away, a fucking Hellfire that blew everything to smithereens. He hoped Zasha was burning in hell.

  Damn, his adrenaline spiked just thinking about it and it made his dick hard.

  “What time is it?” she asked, her voice rusty.

  Time for him to fuck her again was his only thought.

  She moved against him, and he had to grit his teeth. If he hadn’t felt so raw right now, he would have thought he was dreaming. He couldn’t count the moments that he’d wanted to be with her like this again. It was the first time he’d ever approved of these damn military bunks. It forced them to be as close as possible to fit.

  “Still early, just an hour since you barged your way in here and forced me to accept your damn comfort,” he growled.

  Not fazed in the least, she ran her hand up his torso, sighing softly. “There’s a time in everyone’s life when someone has to make the decision for them. You are a stubborn man.”

  “Ha! I’m stubborn.”

  He felt her shrug. “So, the kettle and the pot are both black. What’s your point?”

  “Thank you,” he said simply. She stilled beside him, then pushed up until she could look him in the face.

  She brought her leg up, encountering his now almost painful hard-on. She looked at him, her eyes all smoky from sleep. “Is that a sign of gratitude or are you just happy to see me?” she said, her voice husky and sexy as hell.

  He rasped out a low laugh. She didn’t know the half of it. “You are something, woman.”

  “Don’t I know it.” Her tone was full of sass.

  Experiencing a thickness in his chest, Fast Lane lifted a swath of her hair. Maybe if he didn’t like her so damned much, maybe he could let go. But she made him laugh, and she would do anything he asked of her—except re-marry him. Disconnecting from that thought, he caressed the swell of her breast with the backs of his fingers. Trying to stay away from the danger zones, he kept it light. “Nothing but a piece of sass.”

  Her eyes got dark, the pulse point in her neck beating, and she gave him a smile that he felt all the way down to his toes. With the sensuousness of a cat, she slithered on top of him, her hair spilling around them as she straddled his hips.

  She bent over and pressed her breasts to his chest. He loved the way her eyes got all soft and inviting. “You are a beautiful man, Ford.” Softly, so softly, she cupped his face in her hands and kissed him, her mouth moist and pliant and unbelievably gentle.

  When she went to pull away, he slid his hand up to the back of her head and pulled her against him, releasing a very shaky sigh. “Let me hold you, Solace,” he whispered unevenly. “Damn, but I’ve missed holding you like this.” And he had. Sex with her always felt like the first time. It was the absolute best. But this was what filled up the holes inside him, this. This intimacy, the feeling they had become part of one another. And she understood how much he needed that.

  Pulling her hair out of the way, he kissed the base of her neck, then cradled her tightly against him, letting the sensation wash through his whole body. It didn’t get better than this. It couldn’t. Closing his eyes against the thickness in his throat, he decided he would take all of this he could get.

  Releasing a pent-up breath in a rush, Solace flattened her body against his, the weight of her hips tortuous against his throbbing dick. Closing his eyes against the onslaught of sensation, Fast Lane wrapped his arms around her, holding her as desperately as she was holding him, wondering how in hell he would ever manage without her again after this. Maybe, just maybe she had changed her mind.

  He could barely hope.

  Grasping a handful of hair, he clenched his jaw and turned his head against her face, something raw and wild breaking loose inside him. Inhaling raggedly, he clutched her as a tremor coursed through her, and she drew her knees up and pulled out of his hold, her hair cascading around her face as she rose above him. Realizing what was happening, he melted in her intense, hot gaze, her eyes only for him.

  Another tremor shuddered through her, and she rose up, then lowered her weight upon him, taking him deep inside her just where he wanted to be.

  Losing his damn mind, Fast Lane clenched his jaw against the sharp, electrifying surge of feeling, his shoulders lifting off the mattress as she stroked her hips against his hard dick. His heartbeat pounding, his pulse thick and heavy, he tightened his fingers through hers in a white-knuckle grip, turning his head against the pillow.

  “Solace,” he whispered.

  Bending over him, her breasts grazed his chest. “Ford,” she whispered brokenly. “Ford.” Another shudder coursed through her, and she tightened her hold on his hand, her breath catching as she flexed her hips, her hot, wet tightness gripping him, taking him, drawing him closer and closer.

  An agony of sensation shot through him, and he rolled his head again, the chords of his neck taut, and he sucked in a breath through clenched teeth. Damn, he couldn’t hold on much longer and he wanted to let go with her. Wanted to ride out the hard, swelling need. Knew that if she even opened the door just a crack, he was going to barrel through it just to have a chance with her.

  Goddamn his pride.

  Goddamn his fear.

  Goddamn his caution.

  She had his heart anyway. She’d never let go of it, not through time, through distance, through pain.

  Then she moved again, taking him ever deeper inside her, and he went under, the fever claiming him. He groaned and flexed beneath her, driving harder and faster. The pad of his thumb found her core, slick and hot. He rubbed gently. Her hips shuddered, her body bowing as her strokes got deeper and slower, then she cried out giving into her orgasm. The ripples of her climax thrummed against his cock, and he groaned softly. His awareness shattered into a sunburst of sensation that pushed him effortlessly over.

  It took him a while to regain some sense of time and place, unable to relax his urgent hold on her. But finally, he was able to collect enough strength to ease back a little.

  Solace held onto him fiercely, trembling in his arms. Shifting his hold on her, he lifted her hair out of the way, then protectively cradled her face against his chest, his hand cupped at the base of her neck. He brushed a kiss against her hair, then rubbed his thumb along her heated skin. “Hey,” he whispered. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded once, hugging him even tighter, a huge lump of tenderness jamming up in his chest. “I think I will be once we get some stuff out into the open, Ford.”

  He tipped his head and kissed her shoulder. The inevitable talk was now imminent. It was something that he knew had to happen. They had to go back to the past before they could move forward with the present and the future…especially the future. The hope squeezed his lungs so tight he couldn’t breathe.

  He smoothed his hand across her firmly muscled back, then gave her a little shake. “Let’s sit up, so I can see your face.”

  She released a long sigh, then reluctantly stirred and braced her weight on her knees. Fast Lane tightened his hold on her and withdrew, pressing a kiss against her neck when she drew in a sharp breath. He gave her a minute to adjust, then shifted his hips under her. She retreated to the side of the bed and grabbed up one of his white T-shirts and slipped it over her head. There was a chair close to the bed, and she moved to the seat. Her hands clasped and unclasped. He knew that was a nervous tell. He pushed up in the bunk and reached for his discarded shorts and slipped them on.

  He settled across from her, taking her hands into his to still them. “What did you want to talk about?”

  She tightened her hands around his. “I know this is probably the worst possible time for all this to happen…” she trailed off. Then rose and went to the window, wrapping her arms around herself.

  Fast Lane exhaled unevenly and s
hook his head, letting her hands go as she moved away from him. Was this some kind of last goodbye? Making a supreme effort, he tried to smile at her in encouragement. “Tell me, babe, before I go stark raving mad.”

  She stared at him for several moments, then rubbed her upper arms and looked away. Finally, she said, “Us. I want to talk about us. About what happened and why we broke up. I want to understand all of it from your perspective. Something I never gave you a chance to express. I also want you to understand mine. We need…I need to release this guilt and remorse for the way I handled everything.”

  This was it. She was opening up. She wanted him to do the same. All of it that had been pushed to a ball of jumbled-up anger; shame and gut-wrenching regret churned. The knots in Fast Lane’s gut let go, and he dragged his hand down his face. For the first time in three years, he felt they were heading in the right direction. “I was wrong…the way I acted.” He closed his eyes, the memory of the fear of losing her like a panic he couldn’t control. The deaths, the threat dogging him as they fought and ran for their lives. He’d wanted her wrapped up in cotton wool, protected and safe. It was only now he realized that just wasn’t possible, no matter what she did for a living.

  “What…tell me, Ford.” Her voice was fierce and uneven, looking at him, her eyes dark with the past and the need to hear his side of the story. He couldn’t let her down. Not now. Not when so much of his future happiness rode on what he said and did here, right now, this minute.

  He stared at her a moment, then shifted his focus. Avoiding her gaze, he painstakingly sorted out his thoughts, his fears, and what he needed to say. “This conversation is long overdue. About the things we—about the things I should have said to you and didn’t.” Finally, he met her gaze, his whole being resolved to get everything out into the open. Screwing up his courage, he took the step that he knew could change everything. “I was…insecure…afraid that I had let people down. That I wasn’t good enough of a leader to get us all out. I felt that I botched it, and the men who didn’t make it, their deaths were on me. I couldn’t get medical help, and we had to move or all of us would have perished. I failed in my duty as a SEAL and leader.”

 

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