Fitting In

by Amanda Radley

  “I like pizza. Pizza is a meal; the different ingredients are meant to be there. But this chicken korma, for example, the rice, the naan, and the korma itself are all separate entities. I wouldn’t like them to touch.” Scarlett ducked her head shamefully. “I know that is ‘weird’.”

  Heather put her fork down and leaned over the table to place a finger under Scarlett’s chin and encourage her to look up again.

  “It’s not weird. It’s different. It’s you. If you don’t want your korma to touch your rice, then that’s absolutely fine. And now I understand that and I can make allowances for it.”

  “Should you have to?” Scarlett asked, eyes beseeching.

  “I want to.” Heather removed her finger and took a sip of wine. “Being with someone means making choices to make them feel more comfortable. In the same way that I may want to do something nice for you, like bring you your favourite slippers on a cold winter’s night.”

  Scarlett inclined her head, and they ate in comfortable silence for a few moments.

  “Scarlett, I have to admit, I hate the smell of lavender. It reminds me of my grandmother’s house when she died. I’d appreciate it if you could not wear lavender scents,” Heather said.

  Scarlett looked up at her and narrowed her eyes. “You’re coming up with things I can do to accommodate your… idiosyncrasies.”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  “To demonstrate that we all have them. If you cannot wear lavender scents for me, then I can make sure your food doesn’t touch while we eat it at six o’clock for you.”

  Scarlett considered this for a few beats before saying thank you in a tone so soft that Heather nearly missed it.

  “Anyway, how was your day?” Heather asked.

  “Average,” Scarlett replied. “But I have a story to tell you about a suspected thief I was shadowing.”

  Heather smiled widely. It was the first time that Scarlett had offered up information on her day without being asked. It was a small step, but an important one nonetheless.

  45

  A Purpose

  Scarlett sipped the cocoa. Heather had apparently stocked up on Scarlett’s favourite brand at some point. It was a small gesture but a hugely appreciated one.

  They were sitting on a small sofa in Heather’s apartment, having had a similarly successful date to their first one the previous evening.

  After a small hesitation that came when Scarlett confessed her autism suspicions, things had quickly got back on track.

  They spoke about their respective days, about work, about travel, about hobbies. Scarlett found it easy to talk to Heather, as she never had to wonder what was appropriate and what wasn’t. Heather guided the conversation most of the time. The few occasions when Scarlett attempted to do so, Heather easily slipped into whatever conversation Scarlett had decided on.

  It was unlike other social interactions she had experienced; it was easy.

  “Can I ask why you left the army?” Heather asked, sipping from her second glass of red wine of the evening.

  Scarlett made a note to get some red wine for her own apartment, in case things went well and they continued to see each other.

  “I was asked to.”

  Heather chuckled. “Well, I gathered that much. But why did they ask you to leave?”

  Scarlett put her mug of cocoa down on the coaster on the coffee table. “I sometimes questioned orders.”

  “Did you now?” Heather asked, in a tone that Scarlett assumed was sarcastic.

  “I did. Sometimes I was given different orders from different people. And sometimes those orders were not the same as ones we had received in our training.”

  “And you pointed that out, upset people, got moved to another team, department, et cetera, until they ran out of places to move you?” Heather accurately guessed.

  “Exactly.”

  “Do you miss it?”

  “I miss the purpose of it,” Scarlett admitted.

  “Do you not feel that you have a purpose at Silver Arches?”

  “I have a job, but I feel that I’ve been placed somewhere that I can fulfil a goal while causing the least disruption. In the army, I was part of an enormous organisation that exists to serve the country.”

  “Now you stop Mrs Shaw from stealing socks,” Heather said, understanding obvious in her voice.

  “A worthy task, but not a lifelong purpose,” Scarlett said.

  “Then you need to find a new purpose, something that fits with your beliefs, your passions, and your skills.” Heather sipped some wine. “If you want to, of course.”

  “Like the firefighter in Burning Passion,” Scarlett pointed out.

  Heather looked confused.

  “The first book Nico loaned to me,” Scarlett explained. “The firefighter is injured in a fire, unable to go back to work. She felt being a firefighter was the only role she could do and became depressed. A new lover convinced her to follow her dreams of becoming the small business owner of an adventure travel company…”

  Scarlett paused and cocked her head to one side. “I hadn’t realised that the book had taught me a lesson, but now I think it did. I owe Nico an apology.”

  “She does seem to believe she has a sixth sense for providing the right book to the right person at the right time,” Heather agreed. “So, are you going to open an adventure travel company?”

  Scarlett chuckled. “No. I don’t think that is my passion. I had considered opening a business with my ex-girlfriend. We had planned to open a furniture shop when we left the army.”

  “What kind of furniture?” Heather asked.

  “Upcycled furniture. Finding furniture that was no longer of use to people and renovating it or making it into something else. Steph enjoyed those kinds of projects.”

  “Did you?”

  Scarlett considered the question for a few moments. “Not particularly. The fumes of the glue and the paint were bothersome.”

  “So, more Steph’s passion than your own?” Heather suggested.

  “Yes.”

  “Is that why you broke up?” Heather asked.

  “No. Steph ended things with me because I am too much hard work to be with. She told me that I am too weird, and she couldn’t fix me.”

  Heather stared in surprise. “I’m sorry?”

  Scarlett felt as if she had done something wrong and hesitated a moment before repeating what she had said.

  “She told you that?” Heather clarified.

  “Yes.”

  Heather put her wine glass down on the coffee table with a small thud before standing up and pacing around the small living space.

  Scarlett watched her, frowning as she wondered what had agitated the woman so.

  “She actually said that to you? Actually called you weird? To your face?”

  “I am weird,” Scarlett said.

  “No. No, I’m not going to accept that. You do see things differently, but you are not weird and you most certainly do not need to be fixed. To say that to you is… well, it’s cruel.” Heather continued to pace, shaking her head as she went.

  A small beat of happiness rushed through Scarlett. Steph’s words had rung in her ears for a long time, cold and hurtful. But Scarlett had always believed that they were deserved. Heather’s reaction indicated that perhaps Scarlett was right for feeling so wounded by Steph’s words and behaviour.

  “Scarlett, you’re not hard work. And there is nothing to be fixed.” Heather stopped pacing and looked at her seriously. “You know that, right?”

  Scarlett didn’t know that at all. She had for a long time thought that Steph’s words were accurate and a reflection on what most people probably thought.

  Although she hadn’t verbally replied, she assumed her answer must have been written in her expression. Heather sat on the arm of the sofa next to her and pulled her into a hug.

  “I’m sorry she said that to you,” Heather whispered into her hair. “I’m even more sorry that you think there’s a
grain of truth to that statement.”

  Scarlett wrapped her arms around Heather and rested her head on her shoulder.

  She never thought she would have someone in her life who seemed to so thoroughly understand her, or at least to be determined to try to. Heather Bailey was someone that Scarlett didn’t think could possibly exist; she was exactly what she needed. She just hoped that she could repay the favour.

  “What is your passion?” Scarlett asked.

  “The centre,” Heather said without hesitation.

  “You’re very lucky.”

  Heather released Scarlett from the hug and looked at her meaningfully.

  “I am,” she said before ducking down and kissing her.

  46

  A Busy Morning

  Heather arrived at work the next morning bright and early. Sleep had eluded her the previous evening despite her exhaustion.

  Scarlett had stayed until one in the morning. They’d talked about so many subjects that Heather had lost count. They hugged, they tentatively kissed, they shared stolen glances and smiles.

  It wasn’t a date like any Heather had experienced in the past. But it was also more than she could ever have hoped for.

  Dating someone so inherently honest and open had meant the second date had in many ways felt like a tenth date. She felt as though she knew Scarlett better than she did some of her close friends.

  If she wondered how Scarlett felt about something, all she needed to do was ask. The freedom of that was astounding.

  And the realisation that Scarlett was very much aware of her probable autism was another eye-opener. With that elephant in the room acknowledged, they could talk even more openly about things.

  But they’d balanced the big stuff with the smaller matters, and sometimes big and small rolled into one. At one point, Scarlett spoke about a childhood Christmas and a particular popular toy she had been given by her father. That had forced Heather to recognise the not-insubstantial age difference between them.

  That had been a matter for discussion too. While Heather felt it was something that may cause issues, Scarlett had disagreed. They’d eventually decided to wait and see what happened, which was essentially how most relationships worked regardless of the ages involved.

  Heather got out of the car and headed towards the centre’s entrance, fiddling with the clasp on her bag as she walked.

  “Hello, Heather.”

  The familiar French voice was the last thing Heather wanted to hear first thing in the morning. Before her morning coffee, no less.

  “Aurelie,” she greeted the woman.

  She looked up to see her ex standing before her, as flawless as ever. It looked like she had been waiting for her arrival.

  “You’ve been avoiding me,” Aurelie said.

  “I have,” Heather agreed. “I didn’t think there was much to be said.”

  “I wanted to explain why I came back here. I don’t want to cause any issues for you. Or any distress for either of us.”

  Heather stood tall and jutted her chin up defensively. This woman had hurt her, badly. She wished she could be mature enough to act as if she didn’t care, but she did care. The wounds were still raw.

  “Why are you back?” Heather asked.

  “I want a promotion, but to get it I need certain experience. Experience I can’t earn at the head office. I’m back to get that quota, to show that I can do the job.”

  Heather felt relieved. This wasn’t a scheme to get back at her, or a permanent arrangement. As centre director she made a lot of staffing decisions, but some of those still came from The Arches Group directly, and Aurelie’s appointment was such a one. Heather could technically make a complaint, but she never would. And now she wouldn’t need to.

  “I understand,” she said.

  “I don’t want things to be awkward,” Aurelie said. “I know that’s easier said than done.”

  “It is. I… I don’t want there to be awkwardness either. Which is why I avoided you, even though that probably made it worse,” Heather admitted.

  “It did. Which is why I’m ambushing you.”

  Heather opened her mouth to reply but stopped when she saw Scarlett walking past them. She wanted to stop her, to explain, to introduce her, anything. But all common sense flew out of the window in her panic at her new girlfriend seeing her chatting casually in a dimly lit car park with her ex. Scarlett looked confused but passed by them quickly.

  Aurelie turned to watch Scarlett leave.

  “Is there a reason why she is looking at us like that?”

  Heather pinched the bridge of her nose. “We’re dating.”

  Aurelie’s face lit up in a smile. “I see you’re going for the younger woman these days?” she teased.

  “Yeah, it’s a thing I’m trying,” Heather joked.

  “I wish you both all the best, sincerely,” Aurelie said. “I’ll go before I cause any more problems.”

  “I’m sorry—”

  “Don’t be. Things are the way they are. I hope you have better luck with that one than we did,” Aurelie said, turning on her heel and leaving.

  Her words sounded genuine, and Heather realised she hoped the same. She hurried up in the hope she would be able to catch up with Scarlett and explain that Aurelie had been waiting for her.

  She burst into the centre a few moments later, but Scarlett was already gone. Heather wondered about seeking her out, but thought that might look like a guilty conscience.

  Suddenly, she remembered who she was talking about. Scarlett would no doubt ask her directly if she had any concerns. Either way, she made a mental note to bring it up later to advise Scarlett what the impromptu rendezvous had been about.

  Just to be on the safe side.

  The fact she even considered the potential issue indicated to her how quickly and thoroughly she was already falling for Scarlett.

  In many ways, that was a nice problem to have.

  * * *

  Heather stopped by one of her favourite coffee shops, even though she wasn’t technically allowed to have a favourite anything. She picked up a latte and a porridge to go and headed up to her office.

  As she was on the early shift, it was too early for Yasmin to be in, but her office door was wide open and that could only mean one thing.

  She breezed into her office and said good morning to Leo.

  She’d yet to figure out exactly why Leo was spending so much time at Silver Arches. It had been assumed that he’d quickly hand the reins over to his very competent team and would move on to his next project or acquisition.

  But that hadn’t been the case.

  Either he enjoyed Silver Arches or something wasn’t going to plan, Heather assumed.

  “Morning,” he said gruffly, hardly looking up from his phone as he did.

  “Did we have a meeting in the diary?” Heather asked, knowing full well that they didn’t. She sat down, turned on her computer, and started to eat her breakfast.

  “No. I just needed to run a couple of things by you,” Leo said.

  He pressed the off button on the top of his phone and slid it into his inner jacket pocket.

  “We have all the data back from the various departments, we’ve crunched the numbers, and we’re going to need to make staffing changes. A cut in numbers, nothing too dramatic. Mainly a restructuring, for efficiency.”

  “Ah, so you’re personally telling me I’m fired?” Heather asked with a smile.

  It was a joke, but part of her wondered if it was the case. Making light of the situation would ease the conversation if that indeed was what Leo was there to say.

  He laughed. “No, definitely not. I couldn’t run this centre without you, I know that much.”

  Heather smiled and continued to eat her breakfast, hoping her relief wasn’t too apparent to him.

  “You might remember Stephanie Latimer? She was at Audrey’s birthday party?” Leo asked.

  Heather didn’t really remember the woman. She’d met at least a
hundred people that night, but she nodded regardless.

  “I’m bringing her in. She’s great with logistics, knows about leadership and getting the best out of people. Steph’s not worked in a corporate environment before, but she knows what she’s talking about. She might need a little guidance, but—”

  “Do you mean Steph as in Scarlett’s ex?” Heather interrupted. The name rang a bell now. An alarm bell.

  “That’s the one.” Leo leaned back in his chair and looked a little cocky. “You’re not going to tell me that will be a problem? After your little speech about not accepting people not being able to work together?”

  “Not at all. I’ll work with whoever you want me to work with. I’m just very surprised that you are bringing her here, all things considered.” Heather pushed the rest of her porridge away, appetite lost.

  She’d spoken at length with Scarlett the previous evening, peeling away the layers of supposed indifference until she reached the truth.

  Scarlett had been deeply hurt by Steph’s words. Even more hurt by the knowledge that Steph seemed to be eager to put everything behind them and now be friends. How could she honestly expect Scarlett to want to be friends after what she had said?

  It demonstrated a lack of understanding that what she had said was wrong, Heather thought.

  “Relationships break up.” Leo shrugged. “If you and Scarlett break up, I assume you’ll still be able to work together?”

  “Well, of course, that’s the nature of dating someone you work with,” Heather agreed. “I’m merely a little concerned, what with the way things ended. And the fact that Steph seems to want to forget about it all and pretend it never happened.”

  Leo sighed. “I don’t even know what happened between them; Scarlett doesn’t exactly tell me anything. I just know they ended it. Is it really that important?”

  Heather took a sip of coffee. “Right, well, it’s not really my place to tell you.”

  “Then we’re at a stalemate,” Leo said.

  Heather held up her hand. “I hadn’t finished. It’s not my place to tell you, but I will, and if Scarlett doesn’t like that, then I’ll make it clear that it was my decision to tell you.”