Absentee Wolf

  In eight years, Kent had grown from gangly youth to handsome man. His face held no trace of baby fat and was instead covered in a day’s growth or so of beard. He had grown at least half a foot and would be eye to eye with Toby now were he standing. His shoulders seemed wider, or maybe it was the muscles that showed through the stretch of his tee or the pull of his short sleeves on his biceps. His chestnut hair was long and curly on the top. He hadn’t had curls on his head since he was a toddler.

  Toby was fixed in place while Kent gawked at him. His mouth dried and his hands began to sweat, again. More than twenty years his senior and Toby was acting like a teen on his first date all over again. Kent walked the rest of the way into the living room. He brushed past his father until he stood right in front of Toby, his waist at Toby’s eye level. Toby could see Kent’s erection straining against the denim of his jeans just as his was pushing against his khakis. Kent was just as aroused as Toby was. His pheromones had betrayed him.

  “Toby, answer me. Did you know you were my mate?” Toby turned his sight from Kent’s crotch and made his way to his face. Kent’s tone encouraged him to scan quickly past the muscle he really wanted to admire. Kent wore an expression of anger and possibly confusion. Toby couldn’t determine from the way Kent had spoken, so Toby merely nodded his affirmation. He didn’t want to add to anger.

  “Is that why you left?”

  Toby closed his eyes. He was suddenly ashamed of his actions. Years he had denied their bond in the name of Kent’s best interest, and now Toby couldn’t stand to see the disappointment on his mate’s face. Toby nodded again. Kent hmmed, and Toby pried his eyes open to see he was shaking his head. “I get it.” He started to back away from Toby, rejection evident in his face.

  Toby grabbed Kent’s hand to stop him and stood putting himself into his personal space. “Wait. Tayton, can I talk to Kent alone, please?”

  “Sure. Why don’t you two take Kent’s bags to his room? You can talk in there, and I’ll make sure your mom and Brynn don’t interrupt you.”

  Toby grabbed a bag from the entryway and pulled Kent down the hall and up the stairs to his bedroom. Once inside, he closed the door and locked it. Kent’s scent flooded Toby’s senses. He wanted his mate so badly.

  “You didn’t want me for your mate. I can understand that I guess. I’m a kid to you.”

  “No, that’s not it at all. You’re not a kid anymore.” Toby reached out for Kent. His hand slid around Kent’s neck and pulled him to him. His body went flush against Toby’s. He pressed their foreheads together and reached around his back to hold him to his form. “I want you very much.” Toby pressed their lips together, wanting to kiss the mate fate had given him, but Kent didn’t respond. Toby pulled back to look at his face. Kent’s brows were furrowed, and his lips were turned down.

  “I don’t understand. If you want me, why did you leave me?” His voice had fallen to a whisper and his being caved in on himself.

  “I left because I wanted you to be able to grow up and be yourself and not have the idea of a mate always hanging over your head. I wanted you to have a chance to be a regular kid and do whatever you wanted.”

  “Then why didn’t you come back when I turned eighteen?” Toby pulled Kent’s head to his shoulder and held him, his nose buried in his dark curls.

  “So you could go to college. You weren’t done growing up yet.”

  “You think just because I knew you were my mate that I wouldn’t have gone to college?” Kent pulled his head back and pushed against Toby’s chest trying to free himself, but Toby held tighter onto him. “It’s not like I was gonna marry you at eighteen and be your little wifey! If that’s what you think of me, then you really never knew me at all.”

  “No. No, I never thought that.” Toby pulled Kent back to him and walked him toward his bed. “I wanted you to pick the best college for your major, whatever you’d choose. I was afraid that if you knew I was here, you might pick a college close to home instead of reaching for the stars.” Kent glared at him while he spoke, but his feature softened after a moment. Toby’s answer seemed to appease him some.

  “Did my family know?”

  “No one but the alpha knows. I told your father only today. Ben brought me back to do some work on the preserve, and I told your father. I was planning on telling you the next time you came home. Speaking of which, what are you doing home now?” Toby’s mind finally caught up to the moment.

  “It was a surprise. I’m graduating a semester early, and I have only an internship left. They just approved my internship at the preserve. I didn’t want to tell anyone and get their hopes up in case it didn’t get approval.”

  He’s graduating early? Toby felt as though he should have expected it. Kent was always smarter than the average child.

  “You’re home for good now?” Toby’s mind raced ahead. Kent was done with college. This is what he had been waiting for.

  “Well, yeah, why?”

  “Then I am, too.” Toby grabbed Kent’s face and kissed him again. When Kent didn’t respond, Toby pulled back just enough to whisper “please” before attacking Kent’s lips again. Toby prodded Kent’s lips with his tongue, begging him to kiss back, but Kent held firm in his apathy at Toby’s touch, his body rigid and unmoving. Dejected, Toby released his mouth. “Why won’t you kiss me?”

  “It doesn’t work like that.”

  Toby pulled away from him. Suddenly, he realized Kent grew up without him, and he may very well have a boyfriend or even a girlfriend for all he knew. “Are you seeing someone?”

  “That’s apparently what you wanted.”

  It was what Toby had wanted, for Kent to be able to grow and have life experiences. Logically, Toby knew that Kent would kiss someone, date someone, love someone, and have sex with someone. But to hear him admit that he belonged to another soured Toby’s stomach.

  “I understand.” Toby pulled away from Kent and stood. He walked to the door and unlocked it. “I’ll be staying at the preserve in the rental apartments. Your dad has my cell number.”

  Toby walked out of Kent’s room and continued until he was out of the house. He ignored Tayton as he called after him and asked if he needed a ride. Toby just kept on walking with his duffle in his hand. Eight years ago, Toby had left Kansas so his mate could grow up. He grew up and right out of his life.

  Chapter 3

  Kent paced manically across his bedroom floor. Although his thoughts were his own, he still gestured wildly to the empty room. Toby had a lot of nerve thinking he was just going to show up, and Kent would fall into his arms. He left eight years ago. Kent knew that he was a kid, but even then he was smart enough to know they wouldn’t have been together. Kent shuddered at the utter absurdity of his former teen self being with his dad’s best friend. But Toby denied their bond and left. It was going to take a lot of kissing up for Kent to fall into that man’s arms, no matter how good they felt around him.

  “Goddammit!” He kicked the door, leaving a ding mark from his boots. “Why did you have to come back now?”

  Kent threw himself face down onto his bed and buried his head in his pillow, hearing a familiar crinkle. Reaching underneath his pillow he pulled out a worn photo. It was Toby playing volleyball at one of the pack get-togethers. His shirt was off, and his skin was tan and glistening with sweat from the afternoon sun. His face sported his familiar goatee and was turned up toward the sky.

  Kent snorted. Suddenly, Kent’s never-ending crush on Toby made so much sense. Kent shoved the photo back under the pillow when a knock sounded at the door.

  “Come in.”

  His father cracked open the door and peeked his head inside. “You doing okay? Wanna talk about anything?”

  “I know he told you.” His father hung his head before walking in.

  “Yeah, he did.” Tay snapped his head up and held his hands high. “But only just today!”

  “Really? He didn’t tell anyone?”

  “No, he said only Alpha Ben knew.”<
br />
  “Oh.”

  Tay sat on the bed and started swinging his feet. Kent laughed to himself at his father’s nervous gesture. Tay made the same motion whenever he needed to talk about something he didn’t want to discuss or when he was trying to fish information out of Kent, like now.

  Kent had learned all about this activity of his father’s and was very good at ignoring it, so he let him stew for a few minutes. Kent stared at his father’s blank face, while his father continued to swing his feet. In silence.

  “Seriously, Kent? You’re not going to tell me anything?”

  Kent slapped him on his back and sat up. “I knew I could outsilence you. You’re so easy to mess with.” Kent grabbed the bag closest to him and walked toward his closet. He didn’t want to discuss his mating with his father since it involved his dad’s best friend. Plus, when he thought of Toby like that, it kind of grossed him out. He opted for avoidance.

  “I’m graduating early, you know? So I’m officially moved out of college now.”

  “Moved out? How? Early graduation isn’t until December.”

  “I didn’t want to tell you that I applied to do my internship here at the preserve in case it didn’t get approved. It’s all I have left toward my degree, so they said I was free to move out.”

  “That’s awesome. Your mom will be so excited!”

  “And Brynn?”

  Tay chuckled and rubbed his hand over his balding head. “Well, she can get over it, I guess.”

  “Help me unload my…car! That’s why he gave me a car for graduation! He knew! That’s also why he didn’t want me to drive out to see him! That sneaky rat bastard!”

  “Don’t talk about Toby that way!”

  Kent spun around on his father. Kent’s jaw was set tight, and his fists were clenched.

  “I know you’re angry, but he’s still my friend, and, and I don’t want you talking about him like that.”

  His father threw out that last line like he was losing steam, or he realized this was going to be a fight.

  “You’re taking his side, over your own son?”

  “No, it’s just I don’t like to hear you cussing him out. Especially when he isn’t here to defend himself.” Tay’s agitation was evident in his wild gestures that mimicked Kent’s from earlier. Tay flung his arms wide as if that was the end of the discussion, but Kent was far from finished.

  “He’s my mate and that trumps your blasted friendship. If I want to call him a rat bastard or a fucking asshole, I damn well can!”

  Kent’s anger was boiling the more he thought about how Toby tried to buy his affections over the last eight years all leading up to him trying to kiss him today. If Toby thought a car and birthday presents was all he needed to do to stay in Kent’s good graces, he was wrong. He couldn’t just ignore their mating and placate Kent when he felt guilty and then show up when he wanted to like he was “claiming his bride.” Oh, no! If he thought it worked that way, he had another thing coming.

  Kent tore out of his room, letting the door bang on the wall as he flung it open. He knew he sounded like a petulant teen stomping down the stairs, but if he didn’t let off some of the aggression coursing through his body he was afraid he might become violent.

  When Kent saw his car resting in the driveway, he wanted to take a ball bat to it. He heard the gravel crunch behind him while he stared holes in the side panel of the sedan.

  “You know, your car didn’t do anything wrong, and it loves you very much.”

  Only his father could crack a stupid joke when Kent was so mad that he was ready to kill stones. He felt the anger drain away marginally, and he was able to stop posing like a rampaging ape. Kent straightened up and took a deep, slow breath.

  “You’re right. No matter Toby’s intention, the car is mine, and it’s not at fault. But I still might sell it now.” Kent scrubbed his hand over his face and head. This situation was so fucked up. “Can you just help me unload it? Once it’s empty, I’m going to the preserve to see about my schedule and possibly run for a while. I need to blow off some steam in a bad way.”

  “Yeah, sure, son.”

  His father and he unloaded the cramped sedan. Three years of college stuffed into boxes and duffles and crammed in every possible crevice and corner. Kent had thrown away a lot and given his roommate more. But what he had brought home was the things that couldn’t be replaced, books and memories.

  As he walked to his now empty car, he noticed it sat a little higher from the ground. Bet it’ll get better gas mileage now. Oh, well. He started it and headed to the preserve. Kent pulled out of his neighborhood and thought back to all the times he had driven this route. For some reason, today seemed different. He wouldn’t be going back to college. Aside from the internship at the preserve, college was over for him. Kent didn’t even have to return to walk in the summer. He could just have the college mail his diploma here. That was, if he decided to stay once his internship was finished.

  Kent pulled into the preserve and headed around to the “Employees Only” gate, swiped his access card, and parked near the alpha house. He wanted to see Leah and Ben if they were home. Kent had missed them, and his mother had mentioned that Leah was huge now. He had to see for himself since he was a self-proclaimed baby addict. Ever since Brynn was born, Kent had just loved babies and everything about them. He knew it wasn’t the usual thing for a guy, but it was him and he wasn’t going to change it.

  I wonder if Toby wants kids?

  Kent shook his head, trying to rid himself of the thought. It would be a cold day in hell before he agreed to date Toby, let alone have a family with him.

  Focus on the present and seeing Leah and Ben.

  Once again excited, Kent bounded up the steps and knocked on the wooden door. After a few minutes of waiting, it was opened by Beth who helped around the alpha house.

  “Kent, what are you doing here?”

  He realized no one knew about his showing up, so he was going to be going over the details time and time again. Kent pulled her into a hug.

  “I’m done with school except for an internship, which I’ll be completing here at the preserve.”

  “Ooh, that’s so exciting. Do you know what you’ll be doing yet?”

  He followed Beth into the house and through the living room. Kent tried to make note of any changes, but Beth was practically sprinting through the house on her way to the kitchen.

  “Nope, that’s part of the reason I’m here. To talk to Ben and see what I am doing.” Kent started run-walking to keep up with Beth. “Where’s the fire?”

  Beth only slowed when she reached the kitchen. Standing at the stove stirring a large pot of something that smelled delicious was Leah. “Right there. I knew you couldn’t be trusted if I left the kitchen, Leah. You’re not supposed to be on your feet.”

  Beth grabbed the wooden spoon from Leah and shooed her toward the dining nook.

  “That isn’t true. I can be on my feet. It’s just that they swell a little. It’s my house, and I want to do stuff in it.” Kent rushed to help Leah as she tried to maneuver into a chair. “Thank you, Kent.”

  “My pleasure. How much longer do you have?”

  “Under two months.” As Leah responded this time her eyes widened. She must have realized who she was talking to. Kent had to admit, he was enjoying the attention. “Kent! What! You didn’t get expelled did you?”

  “No! I’m here to do my internship. I asked Ben to keep it on the D.L. so that if it fell through no one would be disappointed. I only got into town today and came over to see you first since I heard news of your extraordinary stomach.” Kent reached toward it but hesitated, waiting for permission. Leah held his hand to the side of her belly, and he was immediately kicked. His eyes grew wide. “Amazing.”

  “All day, every day. This one’s a soccer player for sure. But I know you didn’t come just to see me. Ben’s over at his office in the preserve headquarters. He spends most days there now.”

  “Dad filled m
e in on some of what’s going on, but not much since we don’t want to talk over phone lines.”

  Leah nodded her understanding. A lot of living in a shifter pack was like being in the military. Always conduct yourselves so that you don’t endanger the troops, or in this case the pack. Shifters weren’t paranoid, but their entire existence hinged on secrecy.

  Kent stood and hugged Lean once more. “Beth, it was good to see you, too.” He waved at her then turned back to Leah. “I get babysitting duty when you need it.” She waved him off, but he was serious with his offer. When the time came, he was so watching that baby.

  Walking across the preserve was liberating. His wolf was prancing inside, ready to break out and run for hours or days. His wolf didn’t get out to run during college, and as soon as Kent hit pack land he always roused ready to go. The administration building was same as always, Betty sitting at the central table. Without looking up, she greeted Kent.

  “Been expecting you, Kent. Ben’s in his office. I’ll let him know you’re on your way.”

  Her behavior was pleasant but not her usual over the top, outgoing self. Kent chalked it up to bad timing on his part and headed to Ben’s office. Stopping outside the door, he craned his ear to listen and make sure he wasn’t interrupting. It was quiet, so he knocked.

  “Come in.”

  He pushed open the door, and Ben was just standing from his chair behind his desk. Sitting on a couch to the side was Toby. The hair on the back of Kent’s neck rose, and he was suddenly ready for a fight.

  “Kent, calm down.”

  Kent didn’t think that his demeanor was that obvious, but apparently he was wrong. He took a deep breath and focused on Ben, ignoring the mate that had abandoned him.

  “Alpha, it’s always good to see you.” Kent bared his throat at Ben in a sign of submission and sat in the chair in front of his desk when Ben gestured toward it.

  “Kent, I’m glad you’re here. I know that your working here was kind of a stretch, but I’m thankful it got approved. I need smart people that I can trust right now.”