by Blair Grey
“Nah, I think she’s out with friends or something. I saw her leave when I was getting the beer out of the fridge and I haven’t heard her get back,” Nathan said with a shrug. “She likes to get brunch on Sundays.”
“Probably at the diner,” I said with a grin. “Thank God, I managed to get out of working weekends.”
“Lucky. I wish I didn’t have to work Friday nights,” Nathan replied. “But no one else wanted the shift, and they pay better if you are willing to work the shittier hours.”
“Makes sense,” I said with a shrug. “But you should get out of that job and do something you really want to do.”
“Like what?” Nathan asked. “I’ve only got one arm, man.”
“That doesn’t mean that you’re doomed to work at a gas station your entire life,” I said. “Decide what you want to do and do it.”
“I want to be the leader of the Folded Flags,” Nathan said with a smirk.
“You can have the job when my dad gives it up then,” I said with a yawn. “I wouldn’t want to be the one to tell him that you’re gunning for the position, though.”
“He’d probably chop off my other arm,” Nathan joked grimly. I laughed, but I had to agree. That was something I could see my dad do, that was for sure.
“You know what? Let’s give Adam a call,” Nathan said. Adam was another mutual friend of ours. Unlike Aaron, Adam had been a friend of both Nathan and myself when we were in the service. Aaron and I had gotten close, but Adam was the one who had been friends with everyone.
“Alright,” I said. “I can’t imagine he’s doing anything with himself on a Sunday.”
He was another member of the Folded Flags, and I was happy to spend the rest of the day with him and Nathan. Nathan shot him a text, and within the hour, the man was on the porch with us, a beer in his hand.
“Think we can get through this entire thing?” he asked with a grin as he pulled the case of beer he’d brought out onto the porch. “It’s early enough.”
“Don’t tempt me,” Nathan said with a grin. “I’ve got to work at some point tonight.”
“You’ve got plenty of time,” I said with a laugh. “I’ve got to work first thing in the morning, so I already know I’m going to hate the fact that I’m day drinking.”
“You’re not that old,” Nathan said. “But then, like I just said, I know I’m going to hate myself, too.”
“I don’t have to work today or tomorrow,” Adam bragged. “So if you two sissies want to sit back and watch, that’s fine with me.”
He cracked open another beer and tipped it back, and both Nathan and I followed suit. I didn’t care if I was partially hungover the next day. I had learned to live in the moment. The day passed quickly, and we did end up grilling the burgers later in the afternoon.
We talked long into the evening, sipping on our beers and enjoying the drama-free company of being together. I didn’t even realize I was drifting off to sleep until I woke up to the sun shining on my face. There were several missed calls on my phone from my father, and Nathan was still passed out on the porch behind me.
Adam was gone, and I smiled, shaking my head. Of course, the one who didn’t have to work was the one who was up in time to actually make it to a job if he needed to. There was no point to waking Nathan. It was late enough in the morning he would have been too late for his shift, anyway. The gas station would just have to get over it.
I shot my dad a text as I dragged myself to my feet and headed around the side of the house toward my bike. I’d have to head straight to work, which was fine with me, but I already wasn’t looking forward to the lecture I was bound to get from my father when I got there.
One of the customers must have gotten a hold of him when I didn’t show up to open the place that morning. Enough people had his number it wouldn’t have been impossible for someone to tell him the diner was still closed and I was nowhere to be found.
Sure, it might be irresponsible of me, but there was a part of me that didn’t really care. Opening the diner late every now and then wasn’t going to be the end of the world. Or even the end of the business, for that matter.
He really needed to calm down – that was the one thing I wanted from him. Lay off and calm down.
I could manage my own life.
12
Vanessa
“I understand that, and I’ll make sure that it’s done in time for you to approve whether you want it as is or need something changed before the wedding. Yes, I understand that. Yes, okay. Thank you, goodbye,” I hung up the phone with a sigh.
For as much as I loved my job, there were also times when it was hard dealing with the brides and their upcoming weddings. They wanted everything to be perfect – just as they had pictured it when they were a little girl – but they were also prone to changing their mind five or six times before the actual wedding took place.
While I didn’t mind changing up an arrangement to suit the new taste of a bride, the fact of the matter was that I didn’t always have time to make the last minute changes before the wedding date. This was especially true when I was trying to work around baby showers and funerals, as well.
But my boss insisted that we be as accommodating as possible, and unless there was truly no way for me to be able to fill an order, then I was supposed to take it and promise that I’d do my best. I always did my best, but days like today made me feel as though it didn’t matter what I attempted to do for these women, it wasn’t ever going to be good enough.
I sighed as I sat down on one of the benches outside, finally able to take a break. I’d have to talk to my boss when he got back from his lunch and tell him that our current bride had changed the color scheme of her roses. It shouldn’t be an issue…if he had the flowers in the greenhouse to replace the ones that she had already selected.
Of course, she hadn’t been thrilled with the extra fee, but I had no control over that. We were running a business, and if we were going to stay on top of our own expenses, we couldn’t be giving away flowers for free.
It had been such a hectic morning, I didn’t notice my father lingering about the shop until he suddenly appeared next to the bench. I had an orange in my hand – the only thing I was planning on eating for lunch, and I didn’t really want to try to eat it in front of him.
But, with only half an hour to eat, I knew I didn’t have time to mess around. Then again, I could always throw away the food and refuse to eat it. Choosing not to eat had been something I’d started doing in high school. It gave me a sense of control over my life when I felt that I had none.
I knew it wasn’t healthy, and I was likely going to get some sort of adverse side effects at some point, but there were times in my life when I didn’t care. I did what I wanted, or I at least tried to when it applied. Even if that meant I was hurting myself doing it.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hi,” I replied. “I didn’t see you in the shop, or I would have said something sooner. I was on the phone with another bridezilla, and you know how that goes.”
“Your mother was that way when she and I were planning our wedding,” he said with a grin. It was rare for him to bring up my mom, though I knew it was because of her death that he was so overly protective of me. I merely smiled. I didn’t ever know what to say when he talked about her.
“Did you need something?” I asked.
“I came to see if it would be possible to convince you to move home,” he said. “I’ve thought about it a lot, and I’m not at all thrilled with what Carl did. He’s got to be up to something, and until I know what that is, I want you to be where I can keep an eye on you.”
“Dad, we’ve talked about this before. I’m not moving home,” I said with a forced smile. I had a feeling he was going to pull something like this. It had been an argument we had been having since I decided to move out of town. But I didn’t want to have it while I was at work.
“Then at least consider moving back to town. You don’t have to live with your
friend,” he pleaded.
“You seemed all for the change Carl proposed when he told you about the plan,” I said. “Why did you change your mind? I’m sure you could take it up with him if you feel that it’s not fair for some reason.”
“It’s not that,” he admitted. “It’s the fact that I don’t like how their territory is right up to the border of where you live. Hell, you shouldn’t even be living there.”
“You and I both know why I do,” I argued. He shot me a look and said nothing. Once again, I didn’t want to get into the argument I felt was inevitable. He knew without a doubt why I didn’t want to move back in with him – and why I didn’t even want to live in the same town.
My mother had passed when I was just six years old, and it was at that time he became overly protective of both me and my twin brother – but mostly me. While Vance had pretty much been able to go off and do his own thing, I was the one who was watched like a hawk.
My father kept telling me that it was merely because he didn’t want anything bad to happen to me. And while I could see that, even from a parental point of view, that didn’t change the fact that I was an adult, and I didn’t want him to watch every move I made.
It had gotten so bad before I left that he had even had men from the MC checking on me when I was at work. While I did my best to understand, the fact of the matter was that I eventually got tired of feeling like he was spying on me all the time, and I had to get out of there.
After unsuccessfully trying to find a place, I eventually moved in with my best friend. And, I’d been there ever since.
“I worry about you, and I don’t like the idea of you being out here unprotected,” he said.
“Dad! I’m fine! I’ve told you this. I’m not unprotected, and I’m not moving home!” I shot back.
“Listen to me!” he snapped. “I don’t care how old you get, I’m not going to tolerate you talking to me like that. Not only am I your father, but I am the leader of our MC, and I deserve respect!”
“Then why don’t you show me some respect and leave me alone!” I crossed my arms.
“You can argue with me all you want, but I’m not going to put up with this for much longer. You can either come home on your own, or I can have it arranged,” he said.
“Don’t threaten me,” I replied. “I’ve got to get back to work.”
“Don’t walk away from me while I’m talking to you!” my father tried, but it was too late. I was pissed off, and I didn’t want to argue with him anymore. He wasn’t going to change my mind. I didn’t care what he had to say about my life. I threw the orange away, no longer wanting to eat anything.
I’d focus on that part of my life: the one part I could control. I’d be sure to eat something for dinner so I didn’t develop a problem, but the fact of the matter was that I wasn’t going to deal with this, and that was the end of the discussion in my mind.
I wasn’t moving, and that was final.
The rest of the afternoon had dragged by. I didn’t want to deal with the customers, and I really didn’t feel creative enough to deal with any of the arrangements, either. But I dutifully pushed through until I could clock out.
I headed home with my mind still heavy from the conversation I’d had with my dad. I was surprised that I didn’t hear from him again, though there was a bigger part of me that was relieved by that fact. Maybe he was finally getting the hint that he couldn’t tell me what to do about everything. At least, I hoped he was.
I didn’t want to spend the night lying on the couch with nothing but time to think about my argument, so I shot Lynne a text.
Hey, you want to go out and grab a drink and something to eat?
I was almost home before she replied.
Sorry, I have a date tonight. Rain check?
I wanted to throw my phone out of frustration. But, I knew it wasn’t her job to make sure I was happy. She didn’t even need to know that I’d had a bad day.
Of course!
I followed the text with a smiley face emoji and tried to put the day out of my mind as I walked up the steps to my apartment. If I wasn’t going out with my friend, I didn’t want to eat dinner at all. He couldn’t make me. She couldn’t make me. I was the only one who could decide whether or not I was eating, and I was choosing not to.
I sat on my couch with a sigh, trying to focus. I’d gotten through the day, and tomorrow was another chance at things being better. This wasn’t a bad life, it was just a bad day. I sighed.
Finally, I caved in and picked up my phone again. I wasn’t going to text Zach. I didn’t want to dump any of my issues on him. And ever since what had happened when I asked about his tattoos, I wanted to be careful about how I presented myself to him.
There were plenty of times in my day when I thought how it would be worth it to allow our parents to fight over us. At least, we’d be happy. But there was something dark about Zach – a secret I knew he wasn’t telling me and that was driving me crazy.
But stronger than that there was a need to be with him, to have him. To give myself to him and let him do as he pleased with me. I wanted it more than anything, despite the fact there was something he clearly wasn’t telling me.
After a moment of debate I flipped through my contacts until I pulled up his name. A quick text, that’s all it would be. Something simple to put my name back on his radar.
Who was I kidding? I wanted more than being on his radar, I wanted to know when I’d get to see him again.
I wanted the reassurance that he still wanted to see me.
Hey, I was thinking about you. When are we going to get together again? I want to see you as soon as I can.
I hit send and sat back, setting my phone on the couch beside me. It most likely wouldn’t be for a few more days, but at least if I had a timeline, I’d have something to look forward to. Something that would brighten this day at least a little, which was all I wanted.
I’d never known anyone who could light me up from the inside out like Zach did, and I knew just hearing from him would be enough to ease some of the angst I was feeling.
And if I knew Zach at all, it wouldn’t be long before I got a reply.
13
Zach
I want to see you as soon as I can. I promise I’ll make the time for a trip over to your place soon. Working now.
I hit send and put my phone in my back pocket. I knew it was hard on Vanessa not being able to see me as much as she would have liked. Hell, it was hard on me, too.
I wanted nothing more than to see her every day after I got off work, throwing her against walls and fucking her over the couch. I was growing obsessed with her body, wanting more and more and knowing that I had to keep myself in check.
But, there was another side of our relationship that was starting to grow, too. I didn’t just want to have sex with her anymore. I was starting to want to get to know her as a person. Sure, I was still daydreaming about her body every time I touched myself, but also I wanted to know what was going on in that fierce mind of hers.
It would have been a lot easier if I could invite her over to my place. But with the fact my father lived too close to me for comfort, I knew it would be just asking for trouble.
I was still trying to figure out how I was going to reconcile my need to see her, to build a relationship with her, and the fact I knew my father was going to flip shit when he found out about it. Asking her over to my place was just going asking for an explosion.
No, I had to be smart about it, and that was going to take time. Vanessa didn’t seem to want to rush into anything, and I had a feeling that was largely because of what she knew she’d have to deal with when it all came to light, too. Her dad certainly wasn’t going to be a fan.
Hell, for all I knew, Marcus might be even more pissed off about it than my own father. This was his daughter, after all, and I was a feral biker who was interested in her. At least my father would understand my desire to sleep with the girl. Anyone with eyes could see how gorgeous sh
e was – though I knew that wouldn’t be enough to excuse the fact she was one of The Enemies.
I threw the patties on the buns and set the trays in the pickup window, hitting the bell for Meagan to come pick them up. It wasn’t too busy, and it was getting closer to the end of my shift. But, it was the first time all day I felt I had the time to really text Vanessa back.
I could have done it that morning, but I wanted to give her more than a short reply. She clearly was asking for more of my attention than before, and I didn’t want her to think I was losing interest. Quite the opposite, in fact.
The back door opened and I half expected to see Nathan walk in. But, to my surprise, Adam strode in with my father. The two got along stupendously, and there were times I was almost jealous of the relationship the man had with my dad. He wasn’t that much older than me – four, five years maybe.
But the two of them acted more like father and son than my dad acted toward me. Then again, with the life I lived – and the life I was wishing to live – I knew it was better for someone else to be his favorite. That would at least distract him from a lot of what I was doing. For the most part, anyway. At the end of the day, he still expected me to be the leader of the group one day.
It was also entertaining to see how jealous Spencer got over the relationship Adam had with my father. Though Spencer was allowed in on far more of the internal workings of our MC than what I preferred, I knew my father would take Adam over Spencer if he had to make the choice.
I was pretty sure Spencer knew that, too. But he was also smart enough to know not to cause shit with Adam. The fastest way to fall out of my father’s good graces was to cause turmoil within the club. No one dared do that.
“Hey,” I said as I dropped two more pairs of buns on the grill to begin toasting. “You guys hungry?”
“Always.” Adam said. “Make it rare, though.”
“Gross,” I said. “You know there’s a lot of health risk eating ground meat that way, right?”
“Since when are you a doctor?” he asked with a laugh. I rolled my eyes.