by Blair Grey
But since I met Jenna, or rather, since she had come back into my life, I felt on top of the world. I felt like I could handle anything with her, and it made me more open to sharing my feelings. I’d tell more people – not everyone – but more people how I felt, and that felt good.
I didn’t have to bottle everything up all the time. I had the freedom to really be myself again. Sure, I didn’t want to go entirely back to the macho bad boy I had been at one time in my life, but it was nice to get a glimpse of my old self back.
Finally, I wasn’t so afraid of my feelings that I kept everyone at arm’s length. Most, but not everyone. Isaac would be proud to hear that. He had been the one to really deal with my trauma when I got back from combat. He had known me before, when I was far more outgoing and less of a dick.
I was sure he missed that about me. The old me. The me I had been when he and I really became best friends. It wasn’t anything that we’d ever talked about, and I wasn’t sure he’d want to.
But now, there was a part of me that wasn’t afraid of that anymore.
I was a little disappointed when he didn’t answer, but it wasn’t going to stop me from going to the diner anyway. I was starving, and odds were in my favor that there would be someone there to talk to. It was rare for no one from the MC to be there, and I got along with most.
Hell, I got along with everyone better than anyone got along with each other, and I wasn’t afraid to embrace that fact. I didn’t get sucked into the hierarchy the rest of the guys fought about. I didn’t need it. Hell, I didn’t need it even more now that I had my girls in my life.
But I was still looking forward to connecting with Isaac over how it had gone. I grabbed my prosthetic and snapped it in place, then I headed down to the diner. It was surprisingly dead, so Zach was looking rather bored behind his counter.
“Hey,” he said when I walked through the door.
“How’s it going?” I asked. “Dang, where is everyone?”
“I’m guessing taking advantage of the warmth today,” Zach said with a shrug. “It’s not like we’ve been having a lot of good weather lately.”
He was right. The weather had been shit for most of the past two weeks. We were getting way too much rain for my comfort level, so I was also enjoying the warmth of the day.
“You got food for me?” I asked.
“What’re you having?” he asked. I gave him a look and he smirked. He was clearly in a good mood himself. It was rare for him to tease me like that.
“Surprise me,” I said. He pulled out the burger and made a patty before dropping it on the grill. I was sitting in the kitchen with him since there was no one in the diner, and he seemed more apt to talk.
“How’s it going with your shit?” he asked as he slid a basket of fries over to me.
“What, I don’t get fresh?” I retorted as I picked up one of the fries.
“Quit your bitchin’. I pulled them out of the fryer like five minutes ago,” he said.
I smirked as I shoved one in my mouth and only halfway chewed it before answering his question. “It’s going remarkably well. It seems to me that the only person who really has any big issue with this is her brother.”
“Fuck Blaze. I’ve been hoping that guy bites the dust for years now,” Zach said.
“What happened between you two, anyway?” I asked. I knew that they had issues, but I wasn’t quite sure what it was. “I mean, you’ve never told me.”
“Just a lot of little shit. The guy is arrogant as fuck and thinks the world revolves around him. It doesn’t, and I got sick of his shit. With Vance running off to San Francisco, I think Blaze hoped he’d get a shot at second in command,” he shrugged. “Technically, that would go to Vanessa.”
“Does she want it, though? I thought she never really thought much of the MC and really just rolled with the punches because of her dad,” I said. He set the burger down in front of me, too.
“I doubt it’s going to come to that. Vance is still very dedicated, even if he isn’t here,” Zach said. “But I’m sure that’s shit we’ll get worked out when the time comes. Marcus is still a pretty young guy; I don’t think we’re going to have to worry about him going anywhere anytime soon.”
“Hopefully. He’s been doing a great job if you ask me,” I said. Zach gave me an odd look, but said nothing. I knew he was trying to get along with the rival MC better, but it was still hard for him. Some things were still the same as they’d always been, and he was still the son of the rival.
He might be dating the man’s daughter, but that didn’t mean things were going to be fine between them. “He’s still not talking to Vanessa like he could, but she doesn’t seem to care as much as I thought she would. As long as I’m taking care of her and I’ve got my dad on my side, I’m fine.”
“I guess you have to make those decisions in life,” I said. “I have a feeling Jenna would want to get out of the MC if she could. I’m not sure if she’s going to, but she doesn’t really want Allegra to go into the life herself.”
“Not going to christen the girl early?” he laughed. “Probably for the best.”
I was about to agree when Vanessa came in through the back door. She always said hi to me, but whenever she was around, Zach talked to her and no one else. So naturally, I was ignored. I didn’t mind. It was nice to see Zach happy, and she was one of the only people on the planet who made him that way.
I turned my attention to my phone, texting Jenna. But with her still being at work, I knew she wasn’t going to be able to answer. I just wanted her to know that I was thinking about her. Hell, I was always thinking about her, there was no question about that.
I finished my burger in silence, and then I threw away with basket liner and dropped the red basket in the bucket of others. I never bothered to spray it off myself, I preferred to assume Zach would get it, though I never knew for sure if he cared enough to clean it.
With nothing else to do, I headed back to my place. I still had almost an hour before work, so I decided to video chat with my therapist. It had been a while since I had the time to actually go in for therapy, but he was allowing me to talk to him online. It made things a lot easier for me, and with our once a month meetings, I knew he’d want to talk.
“Glad to see you, Nathan! How are you doing?” he asked.
“Well, I’m well,” I said. “Things have been going great, though I’m going through some changes on my end.”
“Good changes, I’m guessing,” he said. “You sound happy. Are you still taking your medication?”
“Yes, Sir,” I said. “But it’s not helping the pain as much in my arm as I would like.”
“Are you having aches still?”
“No, it’s not that, it’s the fact that this prosthetic is so uncomfortable. I don’t like it,” I said. “But I’m learning to live with it. I mean, what else can I do, right?”
“That’s the spirit, but I bet you can get one that works better for you if you want to come in for a new fitting,” he replied. “That’s entirely up to you.”
“I’m not sure I want to deal with it, to be perfectly honest,” I said. “Really. It’s a pain in the ass to deal with as it is. And with my luck, I’m going to end up with another one that is just as shitty.”
“It’s up to you, I’m not going to force you,” he said. “But I can tell you, we can help. Tell me what else is going on.”
I smiled. I was happy to fill him in on all that was going on with Jenna and Allegra. It was such a surprise, and I hadn’t told him any of it. I hadn’t been back since I met her, and I was eager to fill him in on the news.
“I’m glad that this is all working out for you, and congratulations on the fact you have a daughter,” he said with a smile. “But to be honest, I’m a little concerned about a few things. It sounds like you are going through some big changes, and I’m not sure it’s a good idea to go so long between your sessions.”
“But I’ve been doing fine,” I argued.
“I know, and from the sounds of things, you’ve really got a grasp on this, but that doesn’t mean your nightmares or PTSD won’t be triggered by something along the way. Let’s go back to seeing each other once a week, shall we?” he suggested. I wanted to argue with him, but I knew he had me. If he wanted me to come in that much, then I basically had to.
It was all part of the treatment for my disability, as well as for the medication I was on. If I wanted to keep getting the benefits, then I had to keep going to therapy.
“Alright, if that’s what you think would be best, then I’m okay with it,” I said.
“Excellent,” he replied. “We’ll plan on seeing each other soon, take care!”
“You, too,” I said before hanging up.
22
Jenna
I headed out of work with a smile on my face. It was a sunny day once again, and I was starting to hope for more of those. It was getting hard to keep Allegra happy in the house all the time, and I was sure she just wanted to be out and enjoying the fresh air.
I wanted to take her down to the park after I got off work, so I’d grabbed my things and put them in the car already. I could swing by the sitter’s house to pick her up, and then the two of us could head down to the park for the afternoon. I’d already changed into my more comfortable clothes before heading out, and I now eagerly looked forward to getting down to the cool grass.
My phone started ringing, and I was surprised when I didn’t recognize the number. I didn’t get a lot of telemarketers these days, and I didn’t much want to deal with one right now. But, I had a sneaking suspicion in my stomach that I should answer.
“Hello?” I asked, letting the confusion show in my tone. I always felt it was better to act confused around them than to straight up answer. But it wasn’t a telemarketer on the other end.
“Jenna?” the man’s voice asked.
“Yes, who’s this?” I asked.
“This is Isaac. I’m a good friend of Nathan’s,” he said. I didn’t reply. I was wondering why he was calling me, and I tried to ignore the sick feeling that was growing in the pit of my stomach. If he was calling me, there had to be a problem with Nathan.
“Yes?” I said, trying to get to the bottom of things.
“I wish you and I could have met under better circumstances, but Nathan was attacked at his work last night. He got beat up really bad… I guess his prosthetic is pretty much fucked. Anyway, I think you should come to the hospital,” Isaac said.
The more he said, the sicker I felt. I couldn’t imagine someone doing something like that to Nathan. He was such a sweet guy, and I didn’t believe he’d hurt a fly. Sure, he might have been in the military, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t the nicest guy in the world.
“I’m on my way. I’m getting my daughter, and I’m coming,” I said. “Where are you?”
“Zach says we’re at the same hospital in your town. I guess it was faster to get him there than it was to take him back to Casa Rosa. You should be able to get here quickly,” he said. I wasn’t sure who Zach was, but Nathan had mentioned him to me before. He must be another friend if he was also at the hospital.
“I’m going to pick up my daughter and be there as soon as possible. Give me half an hour,” I said.
“He’s unconscious right now, but we’ll be here. When you get to the front desk, tell them that you’re a friend. Zach will come down and meet you. The nurses in this place are shit if you ask me,” he said.
“I will,” I replied. “I’m coming.”
I hung up the phone and pressed hard on my gas pedal, speeding toward the babysitter’s house. My heart raced and my head was spinning, but I mostly felt sick. There were so many people who could have done this, and I wondered if they had the guy.
If they didn’t, I wasn’t going to stop until I found him. I’d make sure justice was served. Nathan had been spending all his time with me. There was no reason to think that he would be doing any business dealing with anyone else. Especially since he wanted his daughter in his life.
I couldn’t see him getting tangled up in drugs or a deal gone bad when he really wanted to have Allegra. There was no way I’d let her be in his life if that sort of thing was going on. In the back of my mind, I had a fear I knew who it was, but without knowing if anyone was even arrested, there wasn’t any way for me to know for sure.
My brother couldn’t have done something like that.
He knew how much Nathan meant to me – to Allegra. I didn’t believe even he would stoop to such a level. But, I didn’t have time to worry about that right now. Right now, I had to get my daughter, and I had to get over to the hospital.
I screeched to a halt in front of the babysitter’s house, hopping out of my car and making it short.
“A good friend of mine is in the hospital,” I said. “I’ve got to get going.”
“Oh no!” she replied. I knew she’d want to talk about it in detail, so I didn’t tell her that it was Allegra’s father. She could find that out later, when I knew he was alright.
“I’ve got to get going,” I said. I scooped Allegra up in my arms and carried her with me to the door. Of course, the sitter followed me with her list of questions, but I didn’t have the time to answer. I had to get out of there and get down to the hospital, and I didn’t care if I had to be rude in the process.
After buckling Allegra into her car seat, I stepped on the gas again and we sped off. I didn’t drive as quickly with my daughter in the car, but I did press the speed as much as I could. I had to. My heart was still pounding, and my mind was still spinning.
What if something were to be seriously wrong with him? What if he didn’t wake up? I had no idea how bad his injuries were, I just knew that he had been beat up. I squeezed the steering wheel as I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. I grabbed Allegra, and we dashed inside. I wasn’t sure where to go, so I walked right up to the front desk to find the woman there.
“I’m here to see Nathan Springer,” I said. “I heard he was brought here last night.”
She looked at me. “We aren’t able to let anyone in to see Nathan yet. The doctor has to clear that first.”
“Please,” I said. “I’m the mother of his child. I need to see him.”
“No, we can’t allow that, Ma’am,” she said.
“You can come with us,” a man interrupted. “Zach Painter.”
I’d never met Zach personally, but the name was very familiar to me. Not only did Nathan talk about him, but he must be the one who was bringing the two clans together. I held out my hand and shook his, then followed him up the hall.
“How bad is it?” I asked.
“He’s not conscious,” Zach replied. “The guy who did it is in custody, though, so that’s a plus.”
“Who was it?” I asked frantically, not sure I wanted to know the answer. He shrugged.
“You know how our lives are. He was someone who had a bone to pick with Nathan, and boy, did he pick it. It pisses me off, though. He had to have known that Nathan got that job, and he chose then to strike. Where the fuck were the other employees? Where was this military vet he’s been talking about? God,” he said.
I nodded. It pissed me off, too. I followed Zach to the waiting room where another man stood, his hands in his pockets. He turned when we walked in the room and introduced himself, as well. “I’m Isaac.”
“Jenna,” I said. “Nice to meet you.”
“I wish it was under different circumstances,” he said again. He looked grim, and I tried not to think about it too much. I knew this man was Nathan’s best friend, so perhaps he was feeling the pain stronger than Zach. It might have been more like me.
At any rate, I didn’t want to think about why he looked so grim.
“Has there been any update?” Zach asked. Isaac nodded.
“I just spoke to the nurse, and she said that he’s going to be in another night. They aren’t able to tell us when we’re going to get to see him – it’s all depending on w
hen he wakes up and shit like that.
“I’m calling my friend,” I announced. They both turned and looked at me, and I shook my head. “I’m not leaving until I see him, and I don’t want Allegra here the whole night. I’ll go get her, or have Khloe bring her back in the morning, but I’m not going to let Nathan stay here without me.”
“I think we’re all staying,” Zach replied. “Go ahead and call your friend if you need to, but none of us are going to leave until we get to the bottom of this.”
I nodded and grabbed my phone out of my purse. My hand was shaking so bad, I was hardly able to reach her contact information. But, it started ringing, and it wasn’t long before she answered.
“Hello?” she said.
“Khloe, I’m at the hospital, and I need you to come get Allegra,” I said, still frantic.
“What the fuck? What’s wrong?” I could hear the worry in her voice.
“It’s Nathan. He’s been beat up, and he’s unconscious. I don’t know how long we’re going to have to wait, but I’m going to be here when he wakes up. Can you please come get Allegra for me? I don’t want her stuck here all night,” I said. I took a deep breath. “He’s going to be okay, I know he is…he has to be.”
Of course, I was trying to convince myself of that just as much as I was trying to convince her, but I had to hear the words. I hadn’t heard them from the nurse, and I worried that they weren’t going to be said. But, I was going to stand by it myself.
“He has to be,” I said again.
“I’m on my way,” Khloe sounded like she was gathering her things, but there was also something else to her tone.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Nothing you need to worry about right now,” she said. “You’ve got enough on your plate. I’ll be right there, just give me a few minutes to get my purse.”
“Okay,” I said and hung up the phone. “She’s on her way to get Allegra.”
“Good,” Isaac said. “You don’t need to worry about that on top of everything else you’re dealing with right now.”
I shook my head. “He’s just got to be alright. He’s got to be. I can’t believe this happened.”