“F’’’ YOU! THEY’RE GONNA KICK MY ASS. HA-MOVE!” said Azarban. He shoved Suola into the two students with whom she had been sparring. As she was re-establishing her balance, Joelnaq interlocked his arms around her and looked into her eyes. Patiently, he grinned and gently kissed her on the lips. He was very smooth about it though. She could barely raise her hand to slap him, physically weakened by his stunning charm! She was so surprised she froze-up in shock. “Mmhmm... Priceless, I’ll be back for you as soon as we bury my little brother in the sand ok wait right here.” He slowly set her onto the warm sand and went after Azarban. She caught up with him and tried to slash him, but he ducked and rolled off. She attempted to blast him with magic, but he evaded it with a back flip and levitated atop of a palm tree. “Sorry, precious, but you’re so magnetically attractive that I’d rather live to steal another kiss.”
“OUGH...! You’re DEAD!” she declared, enraged. She missed three more times. “Hey? Do I need an apple that bad?” Joelnaq quickly inquired with a fantastical grin on his face as he held her blade still with telekinesis. He let go. The queen swallowed her pride and laughed, unable to hold it. She dropped her blade and walked over to Joelnaq. Joelnaq exhaled in her face wittily. This also brought her to laughter. “Where’s Azarban? My friend says she wants to get with him.” Ezequador asked, with his arms around the two students. “AAAAAAAH...!” Azarban’s voice was heard clearly from Ezequador’s room aboard the ship, that’s pretty loud by the way. Ezequador and Joelnaq rushed to the ship. “LET ME GO!” Azarban shouted at Shepherd. “I know but just cool it, man. It’s not that, f’’’ing, big of a deal ay’st.” Shepherd uttered softly to cheer him up. Ezequador busted into his room and asked, “What is going on, Azarban? How did you get in here you were just…How’d you get past me?” Azarban sniffled as he gave an explanation, “I, f’’’ing…tricked Shepherd into reading Dad’s journal for me by saying you ordered him to. It said the devil was gonna abandon us, and we were gonna break our necks.” Ezequador looked at Shepherd heatedly! “What…? I started reading were we left off.” Shepherd explained. “Azarban, that’s why you shouldn’t sneak around like that,.” Ezequador told Little. “Amolvian Sorcery has been converted into holy magic called miracles. The devil has already abandoned us. If I ever have to go to war, I’m making you my spy.” concluded Ezequador.
“We’ve gotta arrest this sleazebag for abandoning us... Who’s the devil?” asked Little. Little, Joel, and Shepherd laughed together for the first time and everyone left the ship to go hang out. Ruien’s Journal was left unguarded on Ezequador’s bed. No one wanted it anyway. After the Dipsel brothers stayed and partied a few days, Suola and Joelnaq became very close. “Joelnaq, I want you to meet my father.” Suola solicited.
“Pharaoh…? He doesn’t want to see me... Alright, but as long as I can bring Ezequador he’s my bodyguard.” Azarban waved goodbye to the queen’s ship as it set sail. Suola and Joelnaq cuddled for a split second, then they were interrupted by a splash of liquor hitting Suola’s shoulder. Ezequador was the drunkest man there, and with all of his bodyguards. “EGYPTIAN CHICKS HERE WE COME, WHOOO!” Ezequador yelled. Suola was irritated and looked at Joelnaq as if she needed him to get him under control. “What…? He’s Lethal... Look. my brother just wanted some company. He doesn’t want to watch us make out the entire trip.”
Little Azarban was being given a future wife assembly by the entire sorceress college. Beautiful women lined up for a chance to graduate early and become royalty. It was like they were trying to get drafted to go pro or something. They danced for him, they French kissed him, and gave him massages. “My lord, Amolvia’s being overrun by ghosts! They’re burning things and drowning people.”
“Veunic said their names were Jinns, or do you know a Jinni?”
“Sh’’ no I don’t know ‘em…Oh sh’’…NO…NOT NOW! Are you sure?”
“The leading ghost asked for you and your brothers. We must hurry back before their patience has run out. Forgive us, your majesty.” Meanwhile, Ezequador and Joelnaq approached the pharaoh’s gate as if it were their own. Joelnaq playfully slid the tip of his sword across the ground between the gate guy and himself. “Cross that line motherf’’’er - It’s, f’’’in’, over.”
“Princess Suola...? Who is this man...?”
“Uh, hi, my name’s Joel’. I was just-”
“SILENCE...!”
“Dude, who the F’’’ are you yellin’ at…?” Ezequador asked the gate guy. The gate guy flew across the throne room and slammed up against Bastet’s footstool. “Ewe..! There’s a dead dog’s head on that guy’s face. Is he sleeping…?” Joelnaq stated as he walked toward the pharaoh with Ezequador and Suola by his side. Suola was sort of adopted by Amun Ra. He wasn’t her real dad. “Alright, enough with the g’’’’’ jokes, crow-boy; Take off the g’’’’’ mask...!”
“He’s half monster, baby.” Suola notified Joel.
“MY daughter, no way...!” said Amun Ra. These guys were half monster and half sorcerer. They guided the Egyptians and nurtured them so well; they had no choice but to worship them. “I HEARD THAT REMARK, A’’’’’’. SHE’S HER OWN WOMAN!”
“Father, I would like to request that Joelnaq be excused from the obstacle course.”
“NO Suola! If you marry this nincompoop, Joelnaq, he must prove himself to ME!”
“Call my brother a nincompoop again, and I’m gonna snatch that beak off your face. Then you’ll have to mumble to communicate... Nincompoop…!”
“Listen... spares me the crap, chirpy, I know about your STUPID little obstacle course.”
“Why don’t you go give it a try? That’s the ONLY way my daughter’s leaving that school. As for YOU, brother, you’re on.” Amun challenged Ezequador. “I’m what?” Ezequador asked as his rapier slowly slid up from his scabbard and trailed his elevated hand. [SHHHHHHHINGGGG!] “Snatch my beak off.” Amun Ra teased as he smirked. “Ughh...! Now you look like a, f’’’ing, sea turtle. Screw thee, how about that, beaky?! I don’t give a sh’’!” Joelnaq teased Amun. “No, b’’’ me, you Nincompoops!” Amun Ra told them. “Pecker…”
“Donkey…”
“What’s a donkey? Say something in English I don’t understand tweet…You’re fowl….”
“Father-” Suola butted in, to get Amun Ra’s attention. She drew her blade and attempted to cut through Ezequador’s armor. When the blade made contact with his armor, it broke. Amolvian armor was as hard as a rock. Amun Ra knew that they could’ve been Ruien’s sons; He immediately changed his heart, but kept a bad-attitude-driven look to begin testing them for answers. Bastet was self-assured, and the truth was clear to her. She rapidly tapped her fingernails against the armrest, one-by-one, as she lounged in her throne. Osiris was slightly busy giving advice to the farmers. He had butterflies in his belly from the moment Soula arrived. He was like her good uncle. Anubis, the bad uncle, was lounging and hoping that nothing bad would happen to Joelnaq and Ezequador. Anubis wasn’t evil at all. He was just a guy with a dog’s head - and an alcoholic. “Ya know what, Pharaoh? I’m gonna show you that I’m worthy, anyway. Ya, f’’’in’, noodle!” Joelnaq said to Amun Ra. The gate guy led Joelnaq to the obstacle course, and Ezequador stayed behind to check out the hieroglyphs. As he looked at the hieroglyphs, he noticed the hieroglyphic guy painting new stories. He went over to visit with him. “Hey, hieroglyph dude, what ya drawin’?” The hieroglyphic guy pointed to the area he began the story in. “When I saw you and Joelnaq arrive with princess Suola, I was inspired to do the beginning,” Ezequador studied the shapes and grew very displeased. “Most of these are true stories.” The hieroglyphic guy added. “Put some more action in ‘em. This sh’’’s, f’’’in’, stiff.” Ezequador ruined over thirty hieroglyphical stories that day. It was one of the greatest disasters in Egyptian history. The pillars, the walls, and even the bathrooms were all re-painted. It was as if some guy doodled over a history book picture. Since they’re
all disturbing, I’m only going to describe a few. A chick with enormous boobs vomiting at the sight of Amun Ra smirking; Ezequador mopping a floor using Amun Ra’s decapitated head on the end of his rapier; the frames were divided with lines, so, it seemed as if he was, actually, mopping up the old hieroglyphs that included Amun’s – chipped off - legend and the Egyptian confederacy... Another new addition was... An Amolvian ship flying off with a pyramid labeled, Amun’s Tomb. The hieroglyph guy found that he’d had a sense of humor, for the first time in his life. He felt safe with Ezequador, so, he begged Ezequador to hire him. “Oh, I was gonna kidnap you anyway, dude. You’re priceless! That sh’’ would’ve taken centuries without you!” Ezequador explained. Amun’s throne sat shifted toward his obstacle course-viewing binoculars, which mounted in his footstool. They extended to the upper left of it on a metal shaft. The binoculars were custom-designed for his bird head. The obstacle course was in a cavern about 20 feet below ground. There was a large opening underneath the thrones allowing the pharaoh to view the entire cavern. It was like a skybox with no windows. Amun pretended to anticipate Joelnaq’s funeral. Osiris, Anubis,
Super Musicians Breakthrough Do Page 9