Season of Hope

by Lisa Jordan

  A moment later, the screen door slammed behind Tucker as he returned inside, leaving Jake staring up at the dusky sky. Strokes of rusty orange faded into the palest shades of pink as the navy sky hovered, waiting to light the earth with its multitude of stars. Around him the night noises sang their choruses as bullfrogs croaked and peepers chirped. Tucker’s advice echoed inside Jake’s head. He wrestled with untangling the wisdom and the emotions he’d stored away for so long because dealing with them was just too painful.

  Maybe it was time to give Tori another chance.

  But what if he wasn’t enough?

  What if she left again?

  Give her a reason to stay.

  Dad’s words swirled through his thoughts, but his own insecurities wondered if he was truly strong enough to make that happen.

  * * *

  This impromptu pizza party had to go well. Had to. Her reputation was at stake. She needed to show Jake she’d moved beyond burning toast and frozen dinners. But being in the Holland kitchen with him made Tori nervous.

  And on Father’s Day.

  But Jake assured her it wouldn’t be a problem.

  After two weeks of painting rooms and completing the last one today, she’d suggested celebrating with pizza, expecting him to decline.

  But, to her surprise, he agreed.

  Once she offered to make it from scratch, Jake had teased her, saying opening a box of Chef Boyardee didn’t count as a recipe.

  Proving it, however, was problematic once she realized nothing had been moved into the newly painted kitchen. Uncertain of Claudia’s plans, the last thing Tori wanted to be was an imposition.

  On anyone.

  But Jake had solved it by suggesting they make the pizzas at the farmhouse as long as she didn’t mind extra mouths.

  The more the merrier. And she meant it. She loved the noise and chaos of family. Especially his family.

  The farmhouse kitchen with white subway tile backsplash, white shaker cabinets and reclaimed barn board countertops invited family to hang out and laugh while they cooked and ate together. A weathered plank with Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread hung over the rectangular table edged against the window that looked over the side yard.

  Jake had mentioned how they’d given his mother the kitchen of her dreams, but she didn’t live long enough to enjoy it. And the table had belonged to Jake’s great-grandparents.

  So much history...so much family in one room.

  If anyone had told her a month ago...or even a week ago...she’d be standing in the Holland kitchen, she wouldn’t have believed it.

  But here she was kneading dough and making pizza with Jake.

  And she still couldn’t wrap her mind around it.

  Tori turned the dough, folded it, kneaded it one last time and placed it in the oiled glass bowl. After covering it with a blue dish towel, she set it on the back of the stove. She reached for the red-stained wooden spoon and stirred the simmering sauce. The tangy scents of the tomatoes tangled with the minced garlic, fresh oregano and basil. She set the spoon back on the rest and reduced the heat under the pot.

  She rinsed out a worn knitted dishrag and wiped up the flour off the table, careful not to spill any on the plank flooring. She rinsed it out again, then draped it over the edge of the deep single-bowl farmhouse sink, and then washed her hands, drying them on the red-checked apron Jake had loaned her.

  A peek at the dough showed it was starting to rise. She gave the sauce another stir, covered the pot, then turned off the heat.

  Tori pushed through the screen door to step onto the shaded back deck, where Chuck and Jake stretched out on wooden deck chairs while drinking iced tea.

  Annabeth raced barefoot across the grass after Livie and Landon, their high-pitched screams and giggles echoing across the hilltop and drowning out the country music station playing softly in the kitchen.

  Tori folded her arms in front of her and drew in a deep breath.

  Content.

  That’s how she felt.

  For the moment.

  And for the first time in quite a while.

  But for tonight, she’d cling to it, hold it close and savor it because experience reminded her it wouldn’t last.

  Don’t borrow trouble.

  Her sister’s advice from their last Skype chat rang in her ears.

  “Those are some good smells coming from the kitchen.”

  Tori looked down at Chuck to find him smiling at her. He raised his glass of tea and winked.

  “You’re probably smelling the pizza sauce. Jake made it, so he gets the credit.”

  “I made it using your recipe.” Eyes closed, his words laced with a hint of humor threaded through her, seaming those ragged edges around her heart. His white untucked button-down shirt opened at the throat with sleeves rolled to his elbow emphasized his tan skin.

  “And not a single can was opened...huh, imagine that.”

  He opened one eye and peered at her. “We haven’t eaten it yet. I have Pizza Pete’s on speed dial.”

  Another time she would’ve leaned over and given him a playful kiss in response to his teasing. Tonight, though, she simply took a mental photo of the look on his face, storing it in one of the deep pockets in her memory. For once she wasn’t taxing his patience.

  As Jake turned to respond to something his dad had asked, Tori’s eyes roamed over his face. The deep lines around his eyes and mouth had softened. The furrowed brows smoothed out as laughter lit up his eyes.

  Oh, how she longed to run her hands through his hair or draw a finger over the angles of his jaw before tracing his lips and covering them with her own.

  She longed for a lot of things.

  She released a sigh as a sudden cloud of melancholy descended over her, chilling her flesh. She rubbed her bare arms to warm her skin.

  Think happy thoughts.

  That’s what she told Annabeth when her niece grew sad over missing her mommy.

  Turning, Tori reached for the screen doorknob just as a scream split the air. She jerked around to find Annabeth facedown in the grass.

  Jake shot out of the chair, jumped the three deck steps and raced over to her, scooping her in his arms. Tori hurried behind him.

  Blood gushed from her nose and mouth, soaking the front of Jake’s shirt.

  Tori reached for her, but Jake nodded to the house. “Grab the door for me. Let’s get her inside.”

  Rushing up the deck stairs, Tori jerked the screen door open as Jake carried Annabeth into the kitchen. He sat the crying child on the counter next to the sink, then opened one of the drawers and pulled out a clean dish towel. He soaked it under cold running water and squeezed it out one-handed.

  Tori wrapped an arm around Annabeth, holding her close. She brushed tangled hair away from her face as Jake gently wiped away blood that continued to stream from her nose.

  He grabbed a wad of paper towels, wet them and thrust them at Tori. “See if she’ll let you pinch her nose closed. Don’t lean her back. I’m going to wake up Tucker.”

  Tori grabbed Jake’s arm. “Oh, no. Don’t do that. We can handle a bloody nose.”

  Jake shook his head, shot a look at Annabeth, then back to her. Without a word, he opened his hand to show Tori part of a small pearly tooth.

  Tori’s eyes widened and she swallowed her alarm so she didn’t upset her niece even more. Nodding to Jake, Tori picked up Annabeth, carried her to the table and sat with the child on her lap. She cradled her close and pressed the paper towels to Annabeth’s face as she pinched her nose gently.

  Annabeth jerked her head from side to side, trying to move away from Tori’s hand. Tears streamed down her grubby face and pooled in the creases in her neck.

  “Sweetie, you have to sit still and let Auntie Tori help fix your boo-boo.”

  “Hurts.” She pointe
d to her mouth.

  “I know, honey. But the sooner we get your nose to stop bleeding, the sooner the owies will stop hurting.”

  Heavy footsteps thundered on the staircase. A second later, Jake reappeared in the kitchen with Tucker on his heels. Dressed in a T-shirt and nylon basketball shorts, Tucker scrubbed a hand over his face, stifling a yawn, and pushed past Jake to kneel in front of Annabeth.

  He set a black bag on the floor next to Tori’s feet and unzipped it, pulling out a stuffed tan bear. “Hey, punkin. What’s going on?”

  “I falled.”

  He pulled on a pair of blue rubber gloves, then brushed hair off her face and rubbed a thumb across her cheek. “You poor thing. Can I take a look in your mouth?” He held up the bear. “This is my friend Pickles. You want to hold him for me?”

  Annabeth nodded and clutched the bear to her chest as Tori removed the paper towels so Tucker could shine his light into Annabeth’s mouth. She coughed and choked, then vomited in Tori’s lap, which caused the child to wail again.

  Tori’s eyes watered as she pressed her cheek to the top of Annabeth’s head. “Shh, it’s going to be okay, honey. I promise.”

  Jake moved behind Tori and untied her apron strings, then reached under Annabeth to remove the soiled fabric to the sink. She shot him a smile of thanks.

  “Jake, grab me some wet towels.”

  Jake did as his brother instructed and handed them to Tucker.

  “Tori, hold her still but keep her head up.”

  Tori turned Annabeth so she could cradle her niece’s small frame in the crook of her arm but kept her head upright and braced against her shoulder.

  Tucker touched the child’s upper gums, causing Annabeth to cry out and grab at his hands. “I’m sorry, punkin. I’m almost done.”

  Tori’s heart twisted as she tried to calm the sobbing child. She turned her head as tears filled her own eyes and connected with Jake, who watched them with such a look of tenderness that Tori’s heart caved even deeper in her chest. He strode over to the table and rested a hand on her shoulder, giving her a gentle squeeze. The weight of his touch funneled strength through her. She brushed a cheek across his hand, then returned her focus to Annabeth.

  Jake moved his hand across her upper back and settled it behind her neck, kneading her tense muscles gently.

  Tucker glanced at Jake, then at Tori. “Does Annabeth have any allergies?”

  Tori shook her head. “Not that we’re aware of.”

  “I’ll give her some children’s ibuprofen to help with the pain.” He pulled out a bottle of orange-colored medicine and shook it. He extracted a small amount with a plastic syringe and poised it in front of Annabeth and touched her chin. “Hey, sweetie, can you open your mouth for me again? I want to give you some medicine that will help you feel better.”

  Annabeth opened her mouth wide enough for Tucker to dispense the liquid along her inner cheek, then she turned her face into Tori’s shoulder, smearing a dribble of medicine on her shirt. As Annabeth’s tears subsided, a shudder racked her small body.

  Tori tightened her hold and rocked the child, who kept Pickles in her clutches.

  Tucker gathered the soggy, stained towels and used paper towels and carried everything to the trash. He pulled off his gloves, tossing them, then headed to the sink to scrub his hands. “A child’s nose is small with lots of arteries. I’m sure she’s going to be fine. As far as her tooth goes, Jake rinsed it and put it in a glass of milk, but since it’s a baby tooth, it may not be worth trying to put back in her mouth. She needs to see a pediatric dentist because her gums are swelling. I suggest calling first thing in the morning. If she has another bloody nose or if her mouth begins to bleed, take her to the emergency department at the hospital.”

  “Thanks so much.” Tori’s gaze shifted between the brothers standing side by side in front of the sink, then lingered a second longer on Jake. “Both of you. I’m sorry for pulling you out of bed, Tucker. Jake mentioned you got called in to cover a shift tonight.”

  He waved away her apology. “Don’t be sorry. I was half-awake anyway. Great smells drifted up the steps.”

  Tori shot a horrified look at the stove.

  The pizza.

  She shifted Annabeth in her arms, then stood and picked up one corner of the dish towel covering the bowl to see dough had risen above the rim.

  Her shoulders sagged. It looked perfect.

  But she was in no condition to cook.

  She glanced at her blood-soaked T-shirt and soiled clothes, shot a look at Jake, and shrugged. “Looks like you may have to call Pizza Pete’s after all. I need to take Annabeth home, give her a bath and put her to bed.”

  So much for impressing him with her culinary skills.

  Jake pressed his back against the counter. “Bathe her here. I’m sure Livie has jammies she can wear. I’ll loan you one of my shirts. Dad and I can get the pizzas in the oven. You need to eat.”

  “Did I hear my name?” The screen door slammed as Chuck walked into the kitchen holding hands with grubby Olivia and Landon.

  Jake repeated his conversation with Tori.

  Chuck looked down at his grandkids. “Wanna help Grandpa make some pizzas?”

  “Yes.” They spoke in unison.

  “Better get washed up, then.” Chuck guided them to the sink, pulling out a step stool for them to stand on.

  As water splashed in the sink, Jake placed a hand on the small of Tori’s back and guided her and Annabeth out of the kitchen.

  Once again, Jake to the rescue.

  Tori had been taking care of herself for so long that it felt good once in a while to lean on someone else. But if this continued, he was going to think she was more trouble than she was worth and head in the opposite direction. And that was the last thing she wanted.

  She needed to do a better job of taking care of her own problems and less relying on Jake. Especially if he didn’t want to be a part of her future.

  Chapter Six

  Tori had no business being in the kitchen as Jake, Tucker, Chuck and Aunt Claudia laughed together while they assembled and baked the pizzas with Olivia and Landon. Pretending to be a part of a family that wasn’t hers.

  No, she was the outsider...the interloper. The one who didn’t belong.

  Should she walk in? Or head back to the living room and hang out in case Annabeth woke up?

  She should’ve taken Annabeth back to Claudia’s to bathe her and put her to bed as she originally intended. But the longing to be a part of the activity caused her to give in to Jake’s suggestion of bathing her niece at the farmhouse.

  Now that Annabeth was curled up on the couch in the living room and sound asleep, Tori stood in the doorway biting her bottom lip as her fingers dug into the cuffs of Jake’s borrowed sweatshirt, which hung past her hips, but she didn’t care. She’d washed up quickly while Annabeth played in the bubbles Jake had thought to add to her water.

  She needed to let her sister know about Annabeth, but because of the six-hour time difference between them, she didn’t see the sense in waking her in the middle of the night.

  A popular country song came on the radio, and Tucker turned up the volume. He reached for Olivia’s small hands and danced with her in the middle of the room. Her giggles were even sweeter than the music when he picked her up in his arms and twirled her across their pretend dance floor. Landon stood on a chair next to Jake and counted as he placed pepperoni on one of the pizzas.

  Chuck washed up their prep dishes while Claudia tore lettuce for a salad.

  This was what being a part of a family was about—everyone working together to make things happen.

  Not working hard to please and never feeling like she didn’t measure up. No stony silences across from the dinner table when she said the wrong thing. Not standing alone during graduation while other families laughed and
hugged and took pictures together.

  Chuck caught her eye and straightened, reaching for a dish towel. He dried his hands, then tossed it on the counter and wandered over to her, his constant smile in place. “Where’s AB?”

  Tori jerked a thumb over her shoulder. “She’s sleeping on the couch in the family room. I hope it’s okay.”

  “Of course. If she wakes up, she’ll be able to hear us. This rowdy crew doesn’t seem to be dying down anytime soon.” Chuck leaned a shoulder against the door frame and crossed his arms over his chest.

  “You have a great family.”

  Chuck turned and eyed his crew with pride. “Yes, I do. And I don’t forget it for a minute.” He nodded toward Jake and Tucker. “They’ve been through a lot, but they’re strong.”

  Tori had no doubts about that. The strength this family had shown through adversity humbled her. After seeing the hope in Jake’s eyes once he saw Micah’s photo, she wanted to do what she could to bring this family back together. Claudia had given her Evan’s phone number, and although she’d gotten his voice mail, she left a message and hoped he’d reach out to her. Jake had said Evan and Micah were pretty tight, so maybe Evan would know how to get in touch with Micah. But that had been several days ago. And wouldn’t Evan share Micah’s whereabouts with the family if he knew where his brother was? Still, it didn’t hurt to ask.

  A timer dinged.

  “Duty calls.” Chuck retrieved a quilted blue pot holder and opened the oven to pull out two steaming pizzas—one covered in cheese and pepperoni and the other with ham and pineapple. “Hey, Landon, is that pizza ready to go in the oven?”

  “Yep.” He jumped off the chair and reached for the metal pan on the counter, holding it steady in both hands. As he turned, the pan tilted sideways and would’ve slid if Jake hadn’t been quick to right it. Uncle Jake to the rescue. Again.