by Matt Tims
“It’s just me,” Jen said.
Ashley let out a deep exhale before removing her earbuds. “Jesus, Mom, you scared me to death!”
“I’m sorry,” Jen apologized. “I need to talk to you.”
Ashley had never seen her mother in this manner before. Her hands shook and her face was full of panic and confusion. It was an unsettling sight to see.
“Sit,” Ashley directed her while pointing at her bed. “What’s going on?”
Jen was done hiding what she’d been up to. She was desperate to spill her guts to someone. She needed to shed this burden that she’d been carrying on her back since that late October day when she first met Ryan, and Ashley was her most trusted confidant in life.
“I’ve been flirting with Ryan.”
Ashley’s jaw dropped from her seat in the computer chair. Her mother was only a few feet away, sitting on the edge of her bed. Mom had been flirting with Ryan? Ryan!?
“I know…” Jen groaned. “It’s—”
Ashley interrupted, “For how long?”
“Remember when I got mad at you for cleaning his house dressed as a maid?” Jen asked.
Ashley nodded.
“Well, a week later I went next door to bitch him out,” Jen admitted. “Um…except, I kind of ended up cleaning his house.”
Ashley was flabbergasted. “Mom…”
“In that same maid outfit,” Jen finished while looking away. “I’m such a hypocrite.”
Ashley took a deep breath before asking, “Holy shit, has that been it?”
Was she ready to confess to everything she’d been up to over the past few months? There was no denying the relief she currently experienced. Simply admitting to her flirtatious behavior with Ryan had her feeling like an entirely different person. She was somewhat back to herself. There were a few more details to disclose, however.
The look on her mother’s face told Ashley that there was more to this story. “What else, Mom?”
“Well, I’ve been going over there pretty much on a weekly basis to clean. I’ve been thinking about him constantly, and I’ve been wearing this collar that he gave me,” Jen said, unzipping her coat and pulling down the neck of her shirt to expose her favorite piece of jewelry. Ashley’s eyes peered to read the ‘Daddy’s Girl’ writing on the black leather in stunned disbelief. “I’ve been doing his laundry, I made him ice cream, and I kind of-kind of tried to…uh…seduce him.”
Ashley wasn’t sure that she’d heard those last few words correctly. “You did what?”
“I may have tried to give him…” Jen gulped. “Oral sex…”
“Jesus Christ, Mom!”
“And I tried stealing one of his dress shirts but he caught me,” Jen continued to unload all of her guilt. “He let me have it anyway, and I’ve been wearing it to bed every night for the past week.”
The high school senior ran her hand through her long, dark hair. She was beyond stunned. “Is this a joke?”
“No, and you have no idea how good it feels to finally tell someone this.” Jen reached into her jacket pocket and tossed the dog leash to her daughter. “He gave me this too.”
“Wow…” gasped Ashley.
“I know,” Jen groaned in agreement. “I don’t know what to do. He isn’t even paying me to clean but I do it anyway. I don’t know him; but honestly, he feels like everything I’ve ever wanted. And I’m not stupid. I know we aren’t going to have some courtship. I’m not delusional enough to think that he’ll want to date me either. He can probably have any woman he wants. I’m just so confused.”
“You should go for it.”
Jen’s head perked up. “What?”
“You should go for it,” Ashley repeated.
“But, what about Dad?” Jen questioned. “I’m married.”
“You have no idea how much better I feel without Mike,” Ashley told her mother. “And it’s not even like I replaced him with someone. It’s just nice to have that weight gone, you know? It’s freeing. You and Dad don’t get along. Mom, it’s so obvious, and it’s been that way for years. Remember the talk we had a while ago? Actually, remember the last couple of talks we’ve had? You aren’t happy with him. I’m not a little girl anymore, okay? I’m eighteen. I don’t want you to sacrifice your happiness for me. I’ll always love Dad, but if you decide that leaving him would be the best decision for yourself, then you should do it. And who says you have to take things to that extent? Maybe you go do something with Ryan, and you decide it wasn’t what you wanted. It might make you realize that the life you have now isn’t so bad. How are you ever going to know unless you find out?”
“Ashley, it doesn’t work that way,” said Jen. “You can’t go mess around with someone, and then come back if it doesn’t work.”
Ashley didn’t agree with that. “Why not? You aren’t newlyweds. You’ve been married for twenty years. Dad doesn’t have any of the qualities that you value in a man. You said that yourself. Mom, you can’t possibly be happy.”
This wasn’t helping to clear Jen’s mind. Actually, things had become even trickier to understand. “But what if he just wants to use me? Like, I don’t know if that’s what I want. Sometimes it is, but sometimes it isn’t.”
Ashley pointed at her mother’s jacket and asked, “Where did you just come from?”
Jen’s eyes darted down to the floor with a sense of embarrassment. “Ryan’s house.”
“And?”
“He wasn’t home,” Jen quietly answered. “I have no idea what I would’ve done if he was either. Part of me wants to throw this collar at him tell and him to leave me alone, but another part wants to hand him that leash and tell him to use it on me.”
“You’re positive you can’t get what you want from Dad?” Ashley inquired.
“Beyond positive,” Jen reaffirmed her helpless situation of a marriage. “I’ve literally tried everything. You would laugh at half the stuff I’ve done.”
“I still say to go for it,” Ashley said. “Trust me, I’ll never think differently of you. I can’t imagine being with Mike for twenty years, so I have no idea how you’re feeling right now. Are you caught up in some kind of fantasy? Maybe, but maybe not. Maybe everything you need is right next door.”
“He told me a story about how he fucked some young blonde who he picked up at a bar the other week,” said Jen. “I can’t compete with that, honey. I’m not some college girl. I’m forty-four.”
Ashley swiftly shook her head. “You don’t look your age; and even if you did, who cares? He’s obviously flirting with you. Just go for it. Sure, maybe you two won’t end up together, but it could give you the kick in the ass to go for what you really want—like how the talk we had gave me the motivation to leave Mike!”
“I don’t know. I mean, it doesn’t seem right…”
Ashley’s eyes tracked a sudden light in the room, causing her to spin in her chair and look out the window at their neighbor’s house. Ryan’s black BMW was pulling into his garage.
“…and it could end up being awful,” Jen continued, her focus yet to leave the floor. “I—”
“He’s home,” Ashley cut her off.
Jen glanced up. “What?”
“Ryan’s home,” Ashley repeated. “I just saw his car pull into his garage.” She tossed the leash back to her mother and smiled. “Go get him.”
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” Jen muttered under her breath.
“This is like something out of an erotic novel,” Ashley giggled. “A sexually deprived wife falls for her mysterious neighbor, who may or may not have a dark side. Juicy.”
“This isn’t a joke,” Jen smirked. “But, yeah, I would probably read that…”
“So would I!” Ashley laughed again. “Come on, go have some fun for the first time in how long?”
“Like, almost twenty years…” answered Jen.
“Go…” Ashley encourage her. “Go!!!”
Jen grabbed her leash and slipped it back into her jacke
t pocket. She quickly hurried out of her daughter’s room, down the stairs, and out of the house to be greeted by the sight of a black BMV pulling out of her neighbor’s garage. The passenger window rolled down as she approached it.
“Hey, Jen,” Ryan said.
She leaned in and smiled at Ryan who was dressed in a black trench coat. The briefcase on the seat foreshadowed how this conversation would likely end. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise either. Nothing in her life ever worked out.
“Hey,” she greeted him back. “Sorry, are you leaving?”
“Yeah, I just had to grab a few papers real quick. I’m flying to California for some meetings.”
Her heart promptly sank. “Oh, for how long?”
“A week,” he answered. “Do you need something?”
Yeah, she needed something alright. She’d waited, and waited, and waited; and when she finally decided to go for it, he was leaving. It was like everything over the past month was for nothing.
“No, I’m okay,” she told him. “Do you want us to grab your mail while your gone?”
“That would be great,” he said with a smile. “I have to get going. Bye, Jen.”
She waived as he backed out into the street, his black car shrinking with each passing second. Her fantasy zipped away in a sexy sports car, and her reality would be returning home later with his beer gut and disgusting hygiene habits. Tom with her man, and it was time she finally accept it.
Chapter 12 – Baby Steps
One Week Later. Early December. 2:17 PM.
She had gone back and forth with herself all week. She’d even tried giving Tom another shot for some reason. Actually, she’d given him multiple opportunities. She was rejected all but once, and that rather unfortunate get-together would’ve been better off not taking place at all. It was twenty-three seconds of missionary sex, with a horrific grunting noise during his orgasm that still rang in her head. There wasn’t even any foreplay. In fact, Ryan being on her mind was the only reason she’d been wet.
Everything always came back to her neighbor. She felt like a teenage girl who’d been rejected by her crush after he pulled out of his driveway seven days ago. Ashley had told her to wait—to hold guard until he came back and then to go for it again—but more and more doubt crept into her mind as the days passed.
She could picture herself standing in front of some judge in a divorce court, being labeled as a whore and a cheater for her despicable actions. How could a wife and mother allow herself to give into such unfaithful temptation? What kind of example was she setting for her child? But that judge wouldn’t understand. He wouldn’t know what it was like to feel undesired for so long. He couldn’t relate to never receiving the proper sexual attention. Men couldn’t possibly understand her pain. Orgasms from sex were almost a guarantee for guys; and if they didn’t cum, then it was a problem on their end. Women were so often just an afterthought in bed, and the answer is always the same: get yourself off. Well, she was tired of playing with herself like some horny schoolgirl. She was ready to be taken care of.
Perhaps Ashley was correct. Maybe she had to go get what she wanted. What if she had to get aggressive in order to be submissive? That sudden revelation was the entire reasoning for her staring out the window on this snowy afternoon.
She was off from work and desperately praying that Ryan would return home early. There had to be a decent chance of that happening, right? Seven day business trips were usually rewarded by heading home a few hours before the norm—at least in her world. Ryan didn’t seem like the kind of guy who took shortcuts though. There was a chance that today wouldn’t be any different from a typical weekday for the man next door. She didn’t know for sure, but she wasn’t taking any chances missing him again, and the fact that she’d been standing in front of her window for the past ninety minutes only showed how committed she was. She was ready to cheat.
Three Hours Later.
That black BMV may as well have been Elijah in a chariot of fire. The view of Ryan’s car pulling into his driveway had grabbed her attention like nothing ever had. She threw on her coat and bolted out the door.
Seconds later, she stood on Ryan’s front step, ringing the doorbell while her foot rapidly tapped on the frozen stone below. The wait was over. She was done depriving herself from what she really wanted. The sexy hunk who lived next door was going to play out all of her wildest and craziest fantasies—today.
There wasn’t an answer at the door. She impatiently rang the bell again, following her frantic greeting with three firm knocks on the cold wooden frame. Finally, it opened.
“Hey, Jen.”
She reached into her coat pocket before holding out her hand. The leather leash dangled from her grasp. “I want this.”
Ryan stared at her, his lack of emotion causing her to repeat herself.
“This. I want this,” she firmly demanded once again. “Now.”
He calmly stepped aside, allowing the bold brunette to move into the warm house. “So, how do we do this?” Jen asked.
Ryan shut the front door and turned to his neighbor, his stoic expression unchanged. He removed the leash from her grip and methodically walked into the kitchen—still dressed in his winter trench coat—before setting a teapot on the stove.
“Do you want me to go upstairs or what?” she questioned impatiently.
She watched him find a mug and a teabag in the cupboard, and place them down on the counter before taking a seat at the kitchen table. Was she a ghost? What wasn’t he responded to her?
“Hello?” she asked again.
He didn’t react. He didn’t even look in her direction. The leash now sprawled across the oak surface of the table as he silently waited for his water to boil.
What was going on? Was he not on board with this? Maybe her worst nightmare had come true, and he was all talk exactly as she’d feared. Was there a chance that the cute blonde from the bar that night was actually fictional? What if he was buckling under the pressure? What if he loved to talk a big game; but when a girl finally took him up on one of his offers, he folded?
But maybe it wasn’t any of that. He could’ve been waiting for something else. What if they were reading the same book, but she was a few pages behind? In her mind, he was a dominant alpha male who’d just arrived home after being out of town for the past week, and she was dying to be his submissive plaything. Barging into his home and demanding sex probably wasn’t the best approach after she reconsidered her actions, however. He had a million different options and she couldn’t even get her own husband to fuck her properly, so who was she to be making demands? She had to earn what she wanted, but how?
A small layer of dust on the end table caught her attention. Bingo.
An Hour Later.
She finished the last of the laundry and carried the full basket of clothes upstairs to Ryan’s bedroom. She’d already cleaned the entire downstairs without him acknowledging her. He merely sipped his tea while working on his laptop at the kitchen table.
She was beginning to consider the possibility of this not happening. It seemed more and more like he wasn’t interested in her. Sure, the way she approached him today may not have been her best idea, but what guy turned down sex like that? Well, Tom for one, but Tom was different from Ryan. Her husband was lazy and unmotivated while Ryan was sexy and driven. What if he’d had some twenty-year-old hottie fucking his brains in California all last week? That definitely wasn’t out of the realm of possibility; and if that was indeed the case, then the sight of her throwing herself at him might not be so appealing.
But none of that stopped her from strutting through his house in her maid uniform, with her “Daddy’s Girl” collar tightly wrapped around her neck. Desperate, pathetic, woeful: the adjectives that described her behavior over the past month no longer bothered her. She was determined to stick this out until she got what she wanted. She still had to clean the upstairs, but she was running through possible scenarios in case he didn’t make a move on her
today. She would absolutely initiate things if it came to that. Yes, her fantasy would take a hit. He wouldn’t appear as dominant and controlling if he needed to be led, but that wouldn’t ruin things for her. It could still turn out how she wanted. Maybe if—
Her head snapped around courtesy of a loud whistle sounding from her rear. There, she was greeted by the sight of Ryan leaning against his bedroom doorframe, clothed in black dress pants and a white dress shirt that was partially unbuttoned. A hint of dark chest hair on his muscular upper chest was visible, his usual five o’clock shadow appeared slightly darker and more pronounced than normal, and his dazzling blue eyes were as piercing as ever. She nervously fumbled the pair of athletic shorts she’d been putting away before quickly kneeling to retrieve them.
Another whistle caused her attention to shoot back to her neighbor. His right hand slowly moved away from his body as he gave her the “come hither” motion with his index finger. She briskly moved to her feet, and placed his shorts into the drawer before taking a step in his direction.
This time, there wasn’t a whistle, or words, or even a hand signal. It was his eyes. His powerful, compelling, irresistible blue eyes demanded she stop. They were silently scolding her for being a bad girl. They were punishing her for misbehaving.
She didn’t waste a second in dropping to her knee after his finger pointed at the floor. She wasn’t sure how, but she knew exactly what he desired. It was like they were silently communicating with each other.
Her right hand found the floor as her left hand followed. The thin layer of nylon covering her knees courtesy of her stockings didn’t do much to ease the roughness of the hardwood on her skin, but she didn’t care. Broken glass littered throughout the room wouldn’t halt her journey. Ever so slowly, she crawled toward her neighbor, her head never more than a few inches off the ground. Her brown eyes never leaving her master’s face. Master? Was that what he was? He could be whatever he wanted and she would go right along with it. As much as she lusted after Ryan while she was standing, her spot on the floor only caused her to crave him that much more.