Beautiful Otherness
Page 23
The event was known for who was in attendance. There were always countless celebrities in the audience, so I was extremely nervous. CNN and Don Lemon were covering and taking part this year, which made the butterflies in my stomach highly active. Greyson continued keeping me calm throughout the evening. He could tell I was nervous, but he stood his ground when I wanted to have another drink.
“No, Kennedy, not until after you’re done.”
A woman had come by and tapped me on the shoulder signaling it was time for me to make my way backstage. The time had come for them to announce Central Florida’s Person of the Year. I stood backstage as the Master of Ceremonies read all my accomplishments, the money I’d raised, and all the things I had done for the city.
“I want to thank you and introduce to you Mrs. Kennedy Davenport!”
The room exploded with applause.
“Thank you for this award,” I began. “There’s so much more I want to do.”
I gave a brief history of my past and explained that it was because of my past that I partnered with the city and started a scholarship in my mother’s honor.
“The Mary Whitmore Scholarship is a fifty-thousand-dollar scholarship that will serve as a bridge to a life of success for the adopted.”
At the end of the stage, I could see Kylie, Greyson and Murphy waiting for me. Once I was done, I walked over to them and kissed them.
*
I don’t regret anything I have ever done in life or any choice that I have made, but there are moments when I’m consumed with regret for the things I did not do and the choices I was too afraid to make. We spend most of our life being afraid, afraid of rejection and failure, afraid of all that life has to offer us, afraid of who we are, of being found out. Afraid of other people. Looking back at my life, my heart is torn over the places I did not visit, the things I didn’t do, the people I did not love and the love I did not extend. I sometimes wonder what might have been.
But I have learned that failure and sacrifice have led the way to any success I have ever had. They have given me everything. It was Phillip’s failure and my biological mother’s sacrifice that gave me this amazing life along with Mary and Earl’s love and sacrifice, and I am finally at peace with all of that.
Another party isn’t going to make me prettier, younger or more relevant. It won’t reconnect me with some lost crossroads in my life, and it surely won’t fix the parts of me that are broken.
As someone great once said, “Another dent in this car ain’t going to make a whole lot a difference.” At best, it is a reminder that you’re still alive and lucky as hell.
Life will not wait for you to make up your mind. Time waits for no one and your life will pass in the blink of an eye. Live it now, follow your passions, and wait only for those you love. All your failures are meant to direct you to your success. Your beautiful tomorrow will be made of all your todays, so begin to embrace all that you experience in the name of life and love. You cannot know your potential unless you walk through the doors that open for you. And do walk through them, for on the other side you may find a beautiful otherness.