by Cat Kane
Dennis narrowed his eyes. "So you’re not mad about the cart, just that he pretended it wasn’t him."
"Yeah."
"But he didn’t take the cart, he gave it back."
"Well, yeah. But—"
"So you’re mad he pretended he didn’t do something he didn’t do?"
"Well—"
Dennis rolled his eyes, sighing in the dramatic way only ten-year-olds could possibly get away with, and turned back out of the living room with a mutter of, "Grown-ups are weird."
Bree watched him go with a look of pure affection. "Kid’s got that right…"
"What about you?" Riley turned to his aunt. "Why aren’t you mad at me? For lying to you, for bringing Jase here? I let him into your house, I let him around your kids!"
"Well if he’d have stolen one of them, he’d damn well bring ‘em back in a hurry. Even faster than your shopping—"
"Bree!"
"—and my cooking’s more of a danger to these kids than that boy could ever be. Look," she said, waving off Riley’s indignant squeak, "I’m not saying what he did was right. I’m just saying Den has a point, don’t you think? I mean, why did you keep lying to me about the shopping going missing, even after it was already back safely?"
"Because…"
Because what difference would it have made then? Riley’s careless mistake had been fixed, and the cover story he’d concocted to keep Bree from stressing out remained in tact. No one got hurt. It was as close to hitting a magical undo button as he could get.
And it wasn’t as though they’d planned on meeting. If not for that dumb reindeer, if not for the fact Riley had lied and needed a cover story in the first place, Bree would never have invited Jase in. And it wouldn’t have mattered how ridiculously gorgeous Jase was, it wouldn’t have mattered how smart, or kind, or funny, Riley would have fumbled his thanks for the returned shopping bags, closed the door, and they’d never have seen each other again.
He’d never have had the nerve to invite Jase in, or to go ice-skating, or to dance to a band in the middle of the street beneath glittering lights.
He’d never have known the way Jase kissed.
But now that he did, now that he knew how badly he wanted to know more – to know everything – it brought him to the sharp, painful conclusion of the whole mess.
"What if the rest of it was a lie too, Bree?"
"Well"—her expression was gentle—"I guess you’re not going to know that unless you ask him. And…" A devious twinkle sparkled in her eyes. "I think I know a great way you can do it."
* * *
Finding Jase’s apartment—his, Riley knew now, not a friend’s—had been easier with a guide. The streets in this part of town all looked alike, and it took several backtracks to eventually find himself in front of Jase’s door.
No mean feat with the amount of stuff he was carrying with him.
He didn’t know how welcome he’d be, but he’d already spent most of the day sitting at home, miserable and guilty, wishing he could replay that scene. Well he couldn’t replay it, but he could try for another take. And if he stayed at home moping for a moment longer, Bree would have kicked his ass. As it was, she’d laden him with half the things he’d carried with him.
It took so long for Jase to answer the door, Riley had begun wondering if he was home at all. Those dark eyes were wary as they watched him through a narrow gap, as though Jase didn’t want to open the door too widely, didn’t want to invite in any more of Riley’s judgement.
"You said the why didn’t matter," he began, not wanting to give Jase the opportunity to tell him to go to hell. "But it does to me."
Jase shook his head, scoffed a sceptical sound, and for a moment Riley didn’t think he was going to answer at all.
"Cause I liked you too much. If you knew the truth, knew what kind of a shit I really was, then—"
So that probably explained the room, as well as the shopping. He fought the urge to reach out and shake Jase, yell at him that Riley was no-one who mattered that much.
"I wouldn’t have."
"Why not?" Jase glanced at him. "Everyone else does."
Everyone else hadn’t felt the way Jase held him when Riley was flailing on the ice. Everyone else hadn’t seen the way he smiled when Riley gave him the scarf. Everyone else hadn’t seen the way he’d made Carly laugh, or the way he’d charmed Bree, or how hard he’d worked helping Shauna. Everyone else hadn’t been wrapped up in his arms all night, feeling as though it was the safest place in the world.
"Everyone else is an idiot."
"Maybe…"
Riley raised a brow.
"Are you saying everyone else is smarter than me? Are you saying everyone else has better judgement than me?"
"No, of course not, I…" Jase paused, expression deadpan. "Are you messing me around here?"
"Only some." Riley fought the small smile that tugged at his lips. "But you deserve it."
"Yeah, I do."
"You didn’t deserve the way I treated you this morning though. I’m sorry."
"You had every right—"
"No." Riley shook his head. "I didn’t. I thought you’d lied about everything, when I should have known better."
There was a silence, more awkward than painful, until Jase opened the door a fraction wider. "Wanna come in…?"
"Is it warm?" Riley sent him a nose-wrinkling grin, pretending to pat down his pockets as best he could, transferring his belongings from hand to hand. "Cause I have some quarters someplace…"
Jase laughed. "Yeah, it’s warm." He paused, finally noticing Riley had brought half his house with him. "What the hell’s that?"
"Well…" Riley rooted around in one of the bags, producing a miniature Christmas tree, ratty but mostly in tact, and a string of lights tangled around its base. "I figured if I messed up you coming over for Christmas, I could bring Christmas to you. There’s some food, and some other stuff…oh, more cookies too…"
"Why are you doing this, Riley?"
"Cause I kinda want you in my life longer than a few days. Oh—" He reached into the bag again, pulling out a familiar length of multi-colored fuzz. He stepped hesitantly up to Jase, setting the bags down so that he could reach up and wrap the scarf around Jase’s neck, not letting go once he was done. "It always looked better on you. And I kinda figured you might want it back."
Jase pulled him close, holding on tight, face buried in the crook of Riley’s neck.
"I prefer having you back."
Riley smiled, eyes fluttering shut.
"I’m not going anywhere." Arms winding around Jase’s shoulders, he snuck a glance at his wristwatch. "Especially not for the next few hours. I promised you Christmas, right?"
"Yeah." Jase kissed him softly. "But I still haven’t gotten you a gift."
Riley met the kiss, grinned. "Yeah, you did." His laugh was a vibration against Jase’s lips. "You’re the gift that keeps on giving!"
"Demanding brat." Jase mock-growled. "Lemme see the food you brought first. And that tree better not blow the power in this place."
"It won’t." Riley paused, looking thoughtful. "At least I don’t think so. This place is kinda old…"
"Oh, I see how it is, demanding and insulting my place."
"I’m allowed, I bought cookies!"
Jase kissed him again, then tugged him into the room.
"The cookies can wait."
"Yeah, they’ll keep. They’re not that badly burnt." Riley laughed, watching the door swing slowly shut. "Merry Christmas, Jase."
The door clicked closed, shutting the cold outside.
"Merry Christmas, Riley."
End
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