by Alexis Davie
Zane shook his head slightly, as though shaking himself out of a daze. He looked down into his lap for a moment and Cleo braced herself, telling herself whatever was coming, she deserved it and that she would take whatever he threw at her. She felt shock move through her body when Zane looked up at her and she saw he was smiling. He reached out and pulled Cleo into his arms, hugging her to him, half laughing and, she thought, half crying. She didn’t know what to do or how to interpret this surprising reaction, but the feel of Zane’s arms around her somehow comforted her, even when she suspected it was a goodbye. She wrapped her arms around him and held him tightly for a long moment.
Finally, Zane loosened his grip on Cleo and leaned back. He was still holding her, but now they were eye to eye. Cleo hardly dared to look at him, but after everything she had done to him, she knew he deserved that much and she forced herself to maintain eye contact with him.
“Cleo, you didn’t kill anyone,” Zane said. “Least of all my father.”
“Huh?” Cleo said stupidly.
Out of all the scenarios that played through her head in surprising detail in such a short time, this hadn’t been one of them and it threw Cleo so completely that it left her momentarily mute.
“You didn’t kill anyone,” Zane repeated.
“I… I don’t understand. Didn’t you hear what I said, Zane? I was covered in blood. And I blanked out the memory because I was so horrified by what I had done,” Cleo said.
The irony of the fact that she would have given anything for Zane to give her a way out of this and now she was trying to convince him she was a killer wasn’t lost on her.
Zane smiled at her and shook his head.
“It was your blood, Cleo,” he said slowly.
“But…” she started.
“Where are your clothes?” Zane asked, cutting her off.
“In the dumpster round the back of the house,” Cleo said. “I was planning on burning them tonight.”
“Come on,” Zane said. He stood up and held his hand out to Cleo. She frowned but she took his hand and allowed him to lead her out of her bedroom. “I swear I’ll explain everything, but first, you have to know for yourself that blood is your own, otherwise you’re never going to believe me when I tell you what really happened.”
Cleo let Zane lead her downstairs and through to the kitchen. Annie was sitting at the kitchen table, sipping a cup of coffee.
“I guess you two made up, then,” she said.
“I guess we did,” Zane agreed.
He squeezed Cleo’s hand and for a moment, she allowed herself to believe that everything was going to be okay between them.
“What’s going on?” Annie asked as they headed for the back door.
Zane glanced at Cleo, who gave a barely perceptible shake of her head.
“Sorry, Annie, it’s official pack business and it’s on a need-to-know basis only,” Zane said.
Annie looked ready to argue with Zane, but he opened the back door and led Cleo outside before she could say anything. Zane led Cleo to the dumpsters. She had followed him willingly up until this point, but now she hung back, afraid that the illusion of her and Zane being okay again would be over once he lifted the lid and saw the blood for himself.
“It’s okay,” Zane reassured her. “All you’re going to do is sniff your clothes.”
“But why?” Cleo asked.
“Although you’ve held your wolf at bay for so long, she’s always been in you, Cleo. She’s spent years picking up scents and storing them away. Trust me, now that she’s awake, she will recognize the scent of the blood and you will know for sure who the blood belongs to,” Zane said.
Cleo thought about it for a moment. It didn’t sound like something that was possible, but she decided to push her doubts away. Zane trusted that she hadn’t killed his father, even when she was convinced she had. It wouldn’t kill her to trust him on this.
She felt hope blossoming within her when she decided to put her trust in Zane. He knew more about wolves than she could ever hope to and if he said this was a thing, then maybe, just maybe, he was right about her not being a coldblooded killer.
Zane moved away from Cleo and opened up the lid of the first dumpster.
“How did you know which one it was?” Cleo asked.
Zane laughed softly.
“A little tip. If you’re hiding anything doused in blood from wolves, you need to hide it way better than this. Now, come here,” Zane said.
Cleo moved toward him, scared to look. It didn’t matter that she was looking away, though. Zane was right about her sense of smell. It was heightened beyond all belief. She could smell each individual piece of trash and she could detect the rich, coppery scent of blood.
“Clear your mind, Cleo. Let your wolf guide you,” Zane instructed her.
Cleo did as he said, allowing her wolf to stir. Instantly, she knew Zane was right. The blood was hers. She pushed her wolf back down again.
“I don’t get it, Zane. You were right. It’s my blood. But I don’t have any cuts or anything,” Cleo said.
Before Zane could respond, Cleo’s face broke into a wide grin and she threw herself at Zane, who caught her and held her as she laughed.
“Oh my God, Zane, I didn’t kill anyone,” she said.
She caught herself when she realized this didn’t change the fact that Zane’s father was dead, and that she had pushed him away when he needed her the most. She sobered instantly and backed away from Zane.
“Zane, I’m so sorry. Your father… and you came to me… and I made it all about me. Can you ever forgive me?”
“There’s nothing to forgive, Cleo,” Zane said with a smile. “Honestly. I’m just relieved you’re not really dumping me. You’re not, right?”
“No, of course not. I… telling you we couldn’t be together was by far the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do,” Cleo said.
Zane closed the gap between them and kissed Cleo hard on the mouth. She melted against him, feeling once more like herself. She knew in that moment that all of those years she had thought she didn’t belong, she had been wrong. She did belong here. Right here in Zane’s arms. It had just taken her a long time to see it.
“Let’s go inside and I’ll explain everything,” Zane said as he pulled his mouth away from Cleo’s. “And then maybe I can get to the bottom of what really happened to my father last night.”
As they moved back into the house, Annie got to her feet.
“I’m going over to Cody’s,” she said. “To give you two some space. But first, Cleo, be honest with me. Are you in some sort of trouble?”
“No,” Cleo smiled. “I swear everything’s okay, Annie. I wasn’t going to say anything to you because I didn’t want it to be a big deal, but I was acting strangely earlier because I turned for the first time last night. Zane was upset that I didn’t tell him I was going to do it. That’s all.”
“Oh, Cleo, that’s wonderful news!” Annie exclaimed. “Mom and Dad are going to be so thrilled.”
Annie stepped forward and embraced Cleo and then she released her and scooped up her purse.
“Right, I really do need to go. Welcome to a whole new world, little sister,” Annie said.
“Can I ask you something?” Zane said once Annie had gone and he and Cleo were sitting side by side on the couch.
“Sure,” Cleo nodded.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were going to turn for the first time?”
“I… two reasons, actually. Firstly, I was afraid I would change my mind and not be able to go through with it and you would think I was weak.”
“Never,” Zane interrupted, squeezing her hand.
“And secondly,” Cleo went on with a grateful smile, “the first night we really talked, you told me you thought it was noble that I wouldn’t compromise on who I was. I guess I was afraid you would think less of me if I gave in and turned.”
“I don’t see it as you giving in, Cleo. You have always known exactly who you a
re, and I love that about you. And when you decided you were ready to embrace another side of you, I would have thought that was just another side of you for me to love.”
“I wish I had told you now. I did want to. I almost called you to see if you would come with me, but I chickened out. If I had called you, then I wouldn’t have spent so many hours thinking I’d done something terrible. I wouldn’t have almost lost you. And most importantly, maybe you would have seen something suspicious down there and been able to save your father.”
“You’ll never lose me, Cleo. And as for being able to save my father, we’ll never know and I’m not going to dwell on that. And neither should you, okay?” Zane said.
Cleo nodded and then she sat up straighter.
“Okay, you said you could explain the blood,” she said.
“I can explain it all,” he agreed. “Have you ever noticed how no one talks about their first time turning? I mean, it’s celebrated, and people talk about a certain freedom that comes from it, but no one ever talks about the details. It’s kind of an unwritten rule that it’s not talked about. I think it comes from the fear that if young wolves knew what was coming, many of them would opt to never turn at all. And unlike you, that would be for the wrong reasons.
“No one ever turns alone for the first time. They are always accompanied by one or both parents. If their parents are dead, then an older sibling. And if they have no one else, then the pack alpha accompanies them. That’s passed off as it being something like, say, your graduation. It’s a proud moment that your parents want to share with you. In some ways that’s true, but there’s more to it than that.
“The first time a wolf turns, it’s traumatic physically and mentally. So traumatic that no wolf ever remembers their first time. Their minds just can’t cope with it and so the memory is repressed.”
“But why?” Cleo asked.
“Because that first time, your whole body changes. Every bone in your body breaks. Every joint twists. And your skin rips off your body to allow your fur to spring up,” Zane said quietly.
“The blood,” Cleo said. “That’s where it came from.”
“Exactly,” Zane said. “And the reason no one does this alone is so when they turn back, with no memory of what they’ve done, drenched in blood and terrified, their loved ones explain all of this to them and reassure them that they’re fine and that they didn’t hurt anyone.”
“Wow. I can see why they don’t make that public knowledge prior to turning,” Cleo said. “Imagine trying to explain to a child why you think it’s okay for them to go through that.”
Zane nodded.
“Yeah, it’s pretty brutal,” he agreed.
Cleo took Zane’s hands in hers.
“I’m so sorry about all of this, Zane. I should have talked to you before I turned. And I shouldn’t have run off like that when you told me about your father.”
“None of that matters now. I’m just happy we got this all sorted out,” Zane said.
Cleo leaned forward and kissed him again.
“So, now what happens? How do we find out who did this?”
16
Zane felt relieved that Cleo still wanted him. Even in the thick of all of this, he felt the certainty from his wolf that Cleo was meant to be his mate. Although they hadn’t been together that long, Zane already knew that he would struggle to know who he really was without her. And when she had said, “How do we find out who did this?” rather than “How do you find out who did this?”, his heart had soared. They were still in this together, still a couple.
“Actually, there is one way I think we might get some information. But you’re not going to like it,” Zane said.
“What is it?” Cleo asked. “If there’s something you need me to do, then consider it done.”
“The pack member who told me she had seen you on the beach last night also reported that she had seen a stranger down there. I mean, I know it’s a possibility that one of the pack did this to my father, but I honestly can’t imagine who would do such a thing, and so to me, it stands to reason that we need to find that stranger. Instinct tells me he’s the key to solving this thing,” Zane explained. “You were on the beach that night, which means you have the stranger’s scent. If you’re willing to turn again, then maybe we can track him.”
Cleo thought for a moment and then she shook her head.
“I’ll do it if that’s really what you want, but do you really think that’s a good idea? I mean, I’ve only been a wolf once. I have no idea about tracking and shit. Wouldn’t it make more sense for you to ask the pack member who spoke to you to track the stranger’s scent?” Cleo asked.
“You were in wolf form. She wasn’t. She might be able to pick up the trail, but it’s unlikely, because as a stranger, it won’t be a scent her wolf recognizes. Your wolf has the scent, which means you’re much more likely to be able to track it.”
“Then I guess I’ll give it a go,” Cleo said, trying to sound more confident than she felt. “When do we go?”
“Tonight,” Zane said. “Once it’s dark. I want to keep this as quiet as possible for now. The pack will panic if they think we have a strange wolf in our midst, and to be honest, I’d like to keep that panic level to a minimum. I don’t want this getting out until we know exactly what we’re dealing with here.”
The cover of darkness had come in far too quickly for Cleo’s liking. Now that it was time to actually do this, the doubts she had been wrestling with all day threatened to overwhelm her. She had talked to Zane about her doubts, and he had reassured her. It had even worked until she was faced with the reality of this.
As they walked across the sand, Cleo put her hand on Zane’s arm.
“Wait,” she said. “Zane, what if I can’t do this? What if I don’t find the scent? Or if it’s the wrong one?”
“You will find the scent, Cleo. I know you will. And if you follow the wrong one and lead us to a member of the pack, then we’ll know there was someone else on the beach that night, and for now, that’s it. I’m not going to start arresting pack members without any evidence. Please don’t worry about that.”
“Okay,” Cleo nodded. “And remind me again what happens if I wolf out and go crazy and try to hurt anyone.”
Zane smiled patiently at her.
“I’ll be right by your side the whole time, Cleo. You won’t hurt me because your wolf recognizes me as your mate. And if you try to hurt anyone else, I swear I’ll stop you. Not that you will. You’re stronger than you know. Your wolf might be unleashed, free to roam, but you’ll still be the one pulling the strings. You’ll be in control.”
“Okay. Then let’s do this before I change my mind,” Cleo said.
Zane nodded and led her to their cave. He pushed a bag containing clothes for both of them behind a rock and nodded to Cleo.
“Whenever you’re ready,” he said. “Just remember I’ll be in human form and I can’t run as fast as a wolf, so take it slowly, okay?”
Cleo nodded.
“I know this sounds stupid, but I’d feel much better if you brought the clothes with us,” Cleo said with a shy smile.
Zane laughed, but he didn’t argue with her. He retrieved the bag and came to stand by her side.
“Ready?” he asked.
Cleo nodded and began to let her wolf out before she could change her mind. She could feel Zane’s eyes on her as she started to change. This time, she felt no pain. And when she completed the change, instead of the horror she had expected to feel, she felt free. Truly free for the first time in her life.
As Zane watched Cleo turn, he couldn’t help but admire her. The wolf Cleo became was larger than he had expected. Her fur was dark brown on top and snow white beneath her belly and on her chest and legs. She was beautiful, graceful, and strong, and Zane’s wolf instantly responded to the sight of her. He felt it trying to break free, to run with his mate, but he resisted the urge. Right now, they had more important matters to tend to.
Cleo l
ooked up at him, her eyes bright and intelligent. She sniffed the air and howled, her head thrown back.
“You have something?” Zane said.
Of course Cleo couldn’t respond, but she started to walk back toward the main part of the beach, Zane following behind her. When she reached the main bit of the beach, she paused, sniffing the air. He saw her body stiffen as her muscles tensed up and he felt his stomach clench in anticipation of what was to come. Cleo had the scent.
She took off running and Zane ran behind her, trying to keep up. She was nothing but a flash of tail ahead of him now.
“Cleo, wait!” Zane shouted.
Cleo paused, whimpering impatiently while Zane ran to catch up with her. He ran his hand over the smooth fur of her back and she stopped whimpering, moving herself into his touch.
“Stay in control, Cleo. Remember not to leave me behind,” Zane said.
They set off again, Cleo walking at Zane’s side now. They crossed the main beach and Cleo led him down a sandy path between some trees. They walked for a couple of minutes. Zane was starting to think they were on a wild goose chase, but he decided to trust Cleo’s instincts, even if she couldn’t quite do that herself yet. He was glad he did, because the path opened back out onto another stretch of sand and Cleo instantly led him toward a set of caves similar to their own caves.
Zane instantly spotted the telltale wisp of smoke curling out from one of the caves and he knew someone was in there, using the cave as a base. He opened his mouth to caution Cleo, to tell her he would take it from here, but he was too late. She was already entering the caves.
Zane cursed under his breath and began to run. He stepped into the cave. The moonlight was wan here, but the fire cast enough light to see by. Tall shadows danced on the walls, giving the cave an eerie feeling, but Zane’s attention wasn’t focused on them. It was focused on Cleo as she stood facing off against a grey wolf.
Zane started to turn himself, ready to fight the grey wolf and protect Cleo, but before his wolf even had a chance to surface, he saw his caution wasn’t necessary. Cleo jumped into the air as the grey wolf did the same. The two wolves clashed in mid-air, claws flying and jaws snapping.