“There’s something else, Lea. Something you’re not saying.”
Brody watched as she averted her eyes and seemed to resign herself to this last bit of conversation. When she looked at him, there was a sadness in eyes that wasn’t there a few minutes ago. “It occurred to me that you never really responded to what I said. That night and now,” she clarified. “I’ve admitted that I’m in love with you and you had nothing to say.”
His mouth went dry and there was a lump in his throat because…he didn’t know what to say. Hell, right now in this very moment, he couldn’t even get himself to say her name!
“It’s okay,” she said quietly. “Really. I don’t want you to say something because you feel like you have to–especially if it’s not how you feel. And it’s completely okay if you don’t feel it. So there’s no pressure, I just…well…I couldn’t help but notice that you didn’t respond.”
And where her expression was wary and full of resignation a minute ago, it was one of full-on disappointment now.
“I’m going to go and…” She sighed. “I’m going to get caught up on some work I’ve been avoiding–paperwork, paying bills…the usual. Why don’t you give me a call this weekend and we’ll go out, okay?”
He nodded and wanted to say something, but…he couldn’t.
What is wrong with me?!
With a sad smile, she turned and walked out the door. It took several minutes for Brody to clear his head and as he stalked out of his office and past Margaret’s desk, he knew he was too late. Leanna was gone.
He contemplated going after her but…to what end?
The thing was, he knew he cared about her–probably more than any woman he’d ever dated. But was that enough for her? She said it was okay and there was no pressure but suddenly…he felt some pressure.
Actually, a lot of pressure.
And because he chose that moment to choke on his words and freeze up, he knew some damage had definitely been done. There was a very good chance that he just ruined everything they built and he was going to have to do something to make it up to her.
Fast.
Muttering a curse, he started to walk back into his office when he heard Margaret’s phone buzz.
“Yes, he’s right here,” she said. “I’ll let him know. Thank you.”
Brody turned toward her and waited.
“Your father asked if you could join him in his office in twenty minutes. He wants to discuss the Paris contract.”
Nodding, he walked back into his office and shut the door with a little more force than needed. When he sat back down behind his desk, he let out a long breath. The last thing he wanted to do was think about Paris or Japan or business of any kind. He wanted to go after Leanna and explain himself. Did she even realize just how much he had changed for her? Because of her? How everything they’d been doing for the last several months was in complete contrast to the man he’d been for years? It wasn’t an excuse for going completely mute on her, but he didn’t want her to take his silence as something against herself. This was about him and how screwed up he was.
Raking a hand through his hair, he called himself every kind of name he could think of. Maybe he never thought he’d fall in love with anyone, but what he felt for Leanna was more than a simple attraction or admiration and it certainly was more than a casual relationship. Did he think about a future with her? Not necessarily, but he also didn’t not think about it. Whenever he thought ahead–and it wasn’t business related–she was there. Maybe he wasn’t thinking weddings and babies, but he was thinking about her.
Great time to realize that, you moron…
Yeah, he really screwed this up.
And now he couldn’t even go after her because he had to deal with business.
Always business.
If there was one thing he was learning about himself, it was that his drive to climb the corporate ladder was waning. For years he had pushed himself to be better, more powerful, more successful than anyone in the King family. Why? He had a feeling it was largely to do with being a middle child. He’d been doing it for so long–competing with everyone–that he didn’t notice he was the only one in the race. Neither of his brothers wanted the things he did. Travis was completely happy in his position in middle management because it meant he wasn’t on the clock twenty-four seven and could take time off without feeling guilty. His older brother, Daren, was the head of their marketing department and was more artistic and creative than any of them.
So what am I killing myself for?
In the last few months, he’d left work at a reasonable time, taken weekends off, and actually had a social and personal life without King Hospitality falling apart.
“Where does that leave me?” he wondered aloud, turning his chair to look out the window. Right now, he enjoyed what he did but certainly wouldn’t mind doing it a little less–being able to sleep in once in a while and perhaps share breakfast with Leanna every morning before work.
Hell, maybe even not go to the gym to train every day.
Or train at all.
Track and field had been an obsession while he was in school and when he ran his first marathon, he loved the praise he got. But when he challenged his brothers to join him and they declined, he got some pleasure out of knowing he intimidated them and that they knew they couldn’t compete.
It never occurred to him they simply didn’t want to.
Shit.
Suddenly, nothing in his life was making any sense. His head was spinning, his heart was racing, and he was starting to sweat. Reaching up, he ripped his tie off and tugged at the top buttons on his shirt and took great, gasping breaths because he was certainly having a panic attack.
It was a hell of a time for him to realize he’d been obsessing about his life’s trajectory and believing he was winning when in fact it was just the opposite. He’d lost time and opportunities and friends and relationships and for what? To be sitting alone in his office dying of anxiety and too afraid to admit something was wrong?
Closing his eyes, Brody tried to relax–tried to calm himself down–because none of this was a bad thing. Did he miss out on some things? Yes. Did it mean all was lost? No. There was no reason why he couldn’t make more changes in his life and go after the things he truly wanted.
Like Leanna.
Swallowing hard, he forced himself to stand up.
It was harder than it should have been.
For several moments, all he could handle was focusing on his breathing. Once that was under control, he walked around and gathered his things–his phone, his laptop, his satchel. Then, taking a deep breath he walked out of his office and paused in front of Margaret’s desk. Her eyes went wide when she got a good look at him.
“Oh, my goodness. Are you okay?”
“Not yet,” he said, hearing how unsure his voice sounded. “But I will be.”
She looked at him oddly.
“Tell my father I’m unavailable and he should talk with Eric Hammel about Paris. He’s even more knowledgeable on the negotiations than I am.” He turned to walk away, but she called out to him.
“Wait! Are you leaving?” she asked incredulously, although when Brody turned and looked at her, she almost looked pleased.
“I am. There’s something I need to do. It’s more important than Paris and it can’t wait. Have a good night.”
He walked over to the elevator and felt a little unsure about what he was doing. After all, Leanna could be pissed at him, his father could be really pissed at him, and…
“Tell Leanna I said hi and please thank her again for the muffins!” Margaret called out. Maybe she was just being nice, but when he turned to her, she must have seen the indecision on his face. She stood and came over to him. “Brody King, you’re entitled to have a life outside of this company and you are entitled to be happy. Wherever it is that you’re going right now, go with a clear conscience. Everything will be fine here. It always is.”
And then he did something very
unlike himself.
He hugged his assistant. “Thank you,” he whispered as the elevator doors opened. And when he stepped inside and turned to face her, there were tears in her eyes. Neither said a word, but they both knew how important that moment was and he knew he’d never forget it.
Chapter 14
Sometimes we all bake mistakes.
Work would be a great distraction.
When Leanna pulled back up to Meet Me at the Altar and saw that both Skye and Josie’s cars were gone, she was relieved. The last thing she wanted right now was to talk about all the ways her meeting with Brody was cringeworthy.
“I’m such an idiot,” she murmured as she walked inside and went right to the kitchen. Emilie and Ally were both hard at work on the Perrys’ wedding cake and certainly didn’t need her help. Two of her other helpers were icing cupcakes for a retirement party and there were two more washing dishes and doing an overall cleanup.
So there was basically nothing she needed to do.
Awesome.
“Hey, Lea!” Emilie called out. “There was a call for you while you were gone. A potential client looking for two custom cakes for her parents’ anniversary party. I left her number on your desk.”
“Thanks.” Okay, so now there was something for her to do. Walking back to her office, she sat down at her desk and read the message. “Two cakes–one his, one hers. His hobbies are golf and cigars, hers are crocheting and scrapbooking.” Groaning, she shook her head. Good thing they weren’t asking for all of that on one cake or her head just might explode right now.
Reaching down into her bottom desk drawer, she pulled out a sketch pad and toyed around with a few things first. She always like to have a little something in mind before talking with a client if possible. A cake with a golf theme was fairly common, add a couple of cigars on top and it was a no-brainer. Crocheting would be a little more challenging but she envisioned a pair of crochet hooks on the top like the cigars on the other cake, and then decorating the body of the cake in snapshots and scrapbook supplies. Of course it all was going to depend on how large the cakes were supposed to be so…
A few minutes later she had some rough sketches on the page and was about to pick up the phone when there was a knock on the office door. When she looked up, there was Brody looking a little disheveled and not at all like she had left him earlier today. Alarm instantly hit her and she went to stand but he shut the office door.
“What are you doing here?” And yes, she was wary. The only reason he’d be here and shutting the door was because he was going to break up with her and didn’t want her employees to hear.
Letting out a long sigh, she sat back in her chair and silently vowed not to cry in front of him. She’d wait until he left or possibly until she got home and was completely alone.
So she braced herself for the inevitable.
“I’m sorry it took me so long to get here,” he began.
Say what?!
“I should have gone after you. Hell, I should have run down the stairs and tried to meet you in the lobby.”
“You’re on the twelfth floor,” she reminded him. “I know you’re training for a triathlon, but I think it’s a stretch that you could beat an elevator down that many floors.”
A small smile played at his lips. “But not impossible. After all, you don’t know how many stops you might have had to make on the way down. For all you know, I could have gotten to the lobby first.”
“It only stopped once,” she said, knowing this was so not the point to whatever it was he was trying to say.
He stepped in front of her desk and braced his hands on it. “I never should have let you leave,” he said slowly. “I should have spoken up instead of practically going mute while you were talking to me.”
“Brody,” she interrupted, “it’s okay. I told you that. I’d much rather you not say anything than say something that isn’t true. We’re good. Really. I wasn’t trying to pressure you.”
“That’s just it, Leanna. You never pressure anyone. You take what people give you. You excuse their bad behavior like you deserve it, and you know what? It’s not right.”
She could only stare because she wasn’t sure how to respond.
“The day we met, you had no problem calling me out on my crappy behavior and that entire weekend you never held back. But as soon as we started dating, you stopped doing that. You rarely ask for anything.”
“That’s not true…”
Wait, was it?
“It is true. You’ve spoken up on things and when I ignore them or I hurt your feelings, you don’t put me in my place for it. Not the way you should.”
“So…wait. You’re reprimanding me because I didn’t argue with you? That I didn’t get mad because you wouldn’t say you loved me too? Is that what you’re saying?”
“No!” He paused. “Yes.” Another pause. “I don’t know. Maybe.” He straightened and raked a hand through his already messed up hair. “I’m not sure what I should have said, Leanna, but I know that I should have said something instead of clamming up!”
“Okay, fine. You’re here now. Say something,” she prompted, hoping to call his bluff.
Clearly he was up for the challenge because that cocky grin he normally wore was falling into place. Slowly, he walked around her desk until he was standing beside her.
“Fine. I think about you all the time. Whether it’s been minutes or hours or days since we’ve seen each other, I think of you,” he said, his voice unusually soft. “Everything I’ve done since you delivered those cupcakes to my office–every change to my structured life–has been because of you.”
Her heart started to race at his words.
“I would gladly sleep in your tiny bed and stay in your small apartment if it meant we were able to spend time together.”
“Brody…”
He held up a hand to stop her. “I’m not good at relationships. My whole life–everything I’ve done–has been about my job, my position within the corporation, and being driven to be the best at all of it. But after spending time with you, I realized how much of my life was passing me by.” She saw him swallow hard. “And no one cared enough to try to make me slow down. I didn’t care enough about myself. But I do care enough about you.”
Leanna took a shuddery breath as tears stung her eyes.
“I can’t say that I’m in love, Leanna, because I’ve never been in love before. But I know what I feel for you is greater than anything I’ve ever felt toward anyone.” He stepped forward and reached for one of her hands and she was tempted to stand but couldn’t make herself move. “Be patient with me. I know I’m going to screw things up and I have no idea how to be the kind of man that you deserve, but I want to be that man. I want to learn. Just…give me time.”
He had no idea that although he didn’t say the three words she had said to him, he just described it far better than she ever could. And it was enough.
It was everything.
Slowly, she stood, reaching up to caress his cheek. “I think you’re better at this than you realize,” she whispered. “And for what it’s worth, I really love what we have right now. I love who you are, Brody King, so please don’t think you have to change. That’s not what love is or what it requires.”
His dark eyes scanned her face and she saw so many emotions there and felt incredibly blessed that she was the one person who was seeing this side of him. There seemed to be more that he wanted to say but couldn’t, so she took the decision out of his hands. Up on her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his and kissed him. Softly at first, but then with more urgency.
She was pressed up against him, wrapping herself around him, when suddenly, Brody lifted his head. “Um…”
“Where are your partners?”
“Gone,” she said. “I’m not sure where but they weren’t here when I got back. Why?”
A slow grin crossed his face as he stepped away and walked over to the door and locked it. Then, with his eyes never leaving he
rs, he stalked back over to her.
It was the sexiest thing she’d ever seen.
“This is what I wanted to do back at my office,” he said, his voice low and gruff. “I wanted to lock the door and lay you down on my desk.”
Okay, and this was the most turned on she had ever been. Frantically, she looked around. Her desk wasn’t nearly as big as his, but…they could make it work. She hopped up on it and licked her lips. “And we will definitely go there one night, but for now, will this do?” She barely recognized her own voice–it was husky and breathless and all she could think about was how incredibly naughty they were being.
Brody stepped between her legs and cupped her face before fiercely kissing her. He lifted his head and frowned. “I shouldn’t want to take you like this. You deserve a soft bed, candles, and flowers, and…”
“I love all those things. But right now, I’d really love for us to do this. Here. Right now.”
She didn’t have to ask him twice.
“So how much trouble did you get in?”
He shrugged. “I got a bit of a lecture, but nothing I couldn’t handle.” It was a little after ten and he and Leanna were in bed, happily wrapped around each other. After a fast, frantic, and frenzied round of sex on her desk earlier, they had gotten dressed and left the building like two giggling children afraid of getting in trouble.
After kissing her senseless in the parking lot, she had gone home to pack her weekender bag while he went to pick up something for them to eat and they met back here at his place. It felt completely decadent to be home in the middle of the afternoon, and it was perfect.
They’d shared a pizza before soaking in the hot tub, making love in the hot tub, and then showering so they could go out for dinner. Brody would have been completely happy ordering in, but when he gave Leanna the option of staying in or going out, she asked if they could go to her favorite Mexican restaurant and he couldn’t tell her no.
And during it all, his phone was off. He knew there was going to be a bit of hell to pay for it, but it was worth it. An hour ago, he foolishly turned it on and was forced to deal with the dozen missed calls and texts from his father.
With This Cake: A Meet Me At The Altar Novel Page 18