by Lauren Wood
“You look like you are very uncomfortable, Candy. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?”
While I was trying to be nice, at the end of the day, there was only one thing that was going to make me feel better. It was the one reason that I was here and if he would just sign the papers, I would feel a lot better.
“I am just trying to do what I came here to do, Colt. It is nothing against you, but you have to understand that I really don't remember you.”
I think he was bothered by that, more than the fact that I was rude to him. It was rather clear to me that he felt something for me. At the same time, I felt like I was supposed to feel something for him as well. It didn't matter that I didn't remember him, there was something about Colt that seemed familiar.
Could I have really bonded with somebody that much, in less than a night? Whatever bond we had that night, it wasn't enough for me to not leave the next morning. I don't remember the night, but I remember waking up next to him and that I didn't know who he was, and I freaked out. I had woken up took off and never looked back. I never thought I would have to look back and I can’t say that I liked it all that much.
“No, I am alright. This is just rather strange for me.”
“I find it hard to believe that you didn't remember me. I don't remember most women after the initial night, but you were different.”
“How was I different?”
He shook his head like he really didn't know, and I felt like it was genuine. Maybe he was as confused as I was, though it looked like he was not confused. It looked like he knew exactly what he wanted, and his looks were making me blush.
“I don’t know what kind of answer you want me to say. I don’t remember that time of my life. It’s nothing against you. I just had a moment. I was at a bachelorette party and I was feeling strange because I had just broken up with my boyfriend. My best friend was getting married. You can understand that I wasn’t in the right state of mind, right?”
“I knew that Candy. I figured that eventually you would come to me. I just didn’t know it would take so long. You’ve been gone a long time.”
There was no talking to him. What did he think was going to happen? Surely, he didn’t really believe that we were married for real. It was just a crazy night, but he was acting like it was something more.
I didn't wake up with a ring and I don't remember signing the marriage papers. If I had, I would have taken care of this a long time ago. I know that you think there was some sort of bond with the girl that you met that night, maybe a really good bond, but it wasn't really me. I really am not that sort of person and I know it's hard to believe, considering how we met, but that girl doesn't exist.
“Oh, I think she does. I just think that you forgot a little bit, but I am here to remind you.”
Chapter 7
Colt
It was going to be harder than I thought to get her to calm down. She was a little more uptight than I remembered, but her explanation made sense. Although, I didn’t agree with her little speech. I wanted the woman that I married, and I knew that she was in there somewhere. While this was all new to her, Candy had been on my mind for quite some time.
We got back to my house, and we didn’t say too much more to each other on the way. We both had a lot on our minds, but I'm sure that we were thinking about completely different things. Her phone kept ringing, but she never answered it. I had a feeling that it was her fiancé, even though it was ridiculous at best. She shouldn’t be planning to get married when she already was.
I made her a vodka on the rocks, because it was what she had drank before and Candy smiled at me.
“No wonder I was loose. I haven't drunk vodka in a very long time. Nothing ever turned out well on the stuff.”
“I don't like the sound of that.”
I wanted her to drink a lot and loosen up. Then we could talk about what had happened that night and what was going to happen in the future. I wasn't ready to give her up just yet. There were still questions that needed to be answered and she was only one that could do it.
When she asked me for some wine, I knew that it was going to take longer than I thought. She was a lot different than the night that I met her, but it wasn’t in a bad difference. She was a little more controlled and I liked that, but at the same time, the other Candy would have been a lot easier to get back in my bed.
I went to the fridge and found something that I hoped would do the trick. I’d had a lady friend over that wanted some pink, and I asked Candy if that would work.
“Yeah, anything will be better than vodka.”
I asked her why and she said that she had too many bad experiences with vodka. I had to wonder if I was included in one of those experiences. I was starting to get the feeling that I was.
I put her glass and the bottle next to her. I got some whiskey for myself and sat down across from her at the counter. It was strange to think that she really didn't remember me, when I remembered her so well. I remembered where her birth mark was and the way she had moaned out my name. Those are things that I could never forget, and the fact that she had, bit into my ego. How was it so easy for her to forget, when I was finding it impossible?
“So, what am I doing here Colt?”
She kept asking the same thing, but in a different way each time. The truth was that I wasn't sure what she was doing here. Part of me had invited her before I had even really thought about it, and the other side of me wanted to figure out what kind of hold she had on me and why. It wasn't something that I was used to, and I wanted to know why Candy was the woman, the only woman, that I couldn't get out of my mind. There had to be a reason and the only way I was going to get it, was with her here.
“I've said before what you're doing here. I think that we should give this a shot before we just throw in the towel and sign over papers. There had to be a reason that we both said ‘I do’ that night. I have certainly never gotten married before and even if we were drinking a little bit, there had to be a reason.”
“I think the whole point of being drunk is the reason Colt. Like I said before, that is not like me at all.”
“I have to agree that it was spontaneous, but that doesn't mean that it wasn't right. There had to be a reason that we got married, that we met. I have thought about you a lot through the years.”
“Well I haven't thought about you at all.”
Her words stung, and I could tell that she noticed how rude she was being. It may not have been rude, but definitely short.
“Like I said before, I hate to hear that.”
“Look Colt, I don't know what you think is going on here, but I am just here to get the divorce, so that I can get married to Jax. I am not here for any other reason and I don't want you to think that I am. I want us to be civil toward each other, but we both know that this isn't going to go anywhere. I don't know what I was thinking that night and I don't know why I agreed to marry you, but it happened. And now we have to take care of it, like adults.”
She sounded very sure of herself, but I had to wonder if she really felt that way. I wanted to think that she didn't.
“You might be right Candy, but I would just like the weekend to see. Like I said before, I would never force you to do anything that you didn't want to do. We can just go out, go to a movie or museum or something. It doesn't have to be anything more than that. Did you have something better to do?”
She gave me a dirty look and I figured that I should've said that.
“Yeah, I'm supposed to be on my honeymoon.”
Of everything that she said, that was what hurt the most. The last thing that I wanted to think about was Candy with another man. I still didn’t know why I thought about her and why we’d been drawn together, but I could still feel the same attraction as before. I didn’t know what it was, but there was still something between me and my wife and I was going to figure out what it was before she left. My mind was already on the idea that maybe it was time that we had our own honeymoon. I
t was a long time coming after all.
“Sorry that I spoiled it for you. I thought that you remembered. I mean, you did have a ring on that night. I found it later in the bed. It must have come off of your finger when we were preoccupied.”
I had brought it with me and I went to my jacket pocket and pulled it out. It was then that I noticed that I didn’t have mine on, but I thought it a bit too presumptuous to put it on now.
When I handed it to her, she looked at it as if it were a bomb. I could tell that it just made it more real for her and I don’t think that it was something she was prepared for.
“You still have it?”
“Yes, I have mine as well, in my box in my room. It felt strange to keep wearing it when you never came back.”
“Why didn’t you come after me? If you felt so strongly about us, about me being your wife? Why would you wait all of this time for me to track you down?”
“Because you told me about Dylan and how he wouldn’t leave you alone. I didn’t want to be like him. I wanted you to be with me because you wanted to be, not because you felt some form of obligation. That was the last thing that I wanted.”
“I told you about Dylan?”
I agreed that she did.
“Oh. I must have been saying way too much. I never talk about him.”
“Not at all. I loved hearing you talk. We were getting to know each other I thought.”
She bit her lower lip and looked away. I would have given anything to have known what was going on in her mind.
“Do you want me to show you to your room? You might be a little tired from the flight and it is rather late.”
She nodded her head and Candy followed me to the bedroom next to mine. I hoped that the close proximity would bring her to me sooner. It was a low chance of working, but I was as optimistic as ever before.
Chapter 8
Candy
“Sorry Colt, I really have to take this.”
“Is it your fiancée?”
He didn’t sound so happy at the prospect of the caller being Jax. When I told him that it was my friend Lisa, it seemed to lower his stress level. I didn’t want him to think that he was getting over on me. There was a big part of me that knew that he was, but I wasn’t ready to admit it yet. I motioned for him to go and he asked me if he would see me again tonight.
“I don’t know. I might grab some more wine in a bit.”
Colt smiled my way and then left down the hallway. He went into one of the adjoining rooms and I closed the door as I went back in. I answered the phone and Lisa asked me where I was.
“You would never guess if I told you.”
“I have a pretty good idea. I talked to Jax a little while ago. He’s been trying to call you.”
“Yeah, I know. I meant to call him back, but I’ve been in the middle of something.”
“And yet you can answer for me?”
“Whose side are you on?”
I was starting to feel a little defensive and I had a feeling that it was because
I was far too worried about what I was doing wrong. I had feelings for my husband that I wasn’t supposed to have and the mention of Jax, reminded me that I was wrong to feel this way.
“I am not on anyone’s side. I just don't know where your head is right now. Jax told me that you went to go see him, but that can’t be true, right?”
I should have been happy to hear from my oldest and dearest friend, but I can't really say that it was that way at the moment. I didn't want to talk to her about Jax, I wanted to talk to her about Colt and what was going on here, how I was feeling. I realized then that I couldn't. While she said she hadn't picked a side, it was quite clear that she had, and it wasn’t my side that she had chosen.
I wanted to tell her about the fact that I had to be here and that was the only reason, even if it wasn't the truth. But the fact of the matter was that I knew for some reason that she would go back to Jax to tell him. I didn't want him knowing that I had lied to him. I had known that it would be a bad idea, but I wasn't able to come out with it before.
“Yeah Lisa, I am just here long as I have to be. I need to get him to sign the papers so that the divorce will be final. It is the only way that is going to happen before Christmas.”
“What a mess Candy.”
“I can't say that I disagree with you. I sort of wish that I never would've went to that Bachelorette party. Or if I would of went, I wish you would've been there too. You would have kept me from doing something stupid like this.”
“I don't know about that, but at least I would've been right there next to you. At least we would have remembered the next day if nothing else.”
I smile to myself and was relieved that she was back to being my friend, and not another inquisitor for Jax. I’d talked to a lot of those in the last week since the wedding.
“So, I have to talk him into signing papers.”
“What is he like?”
“I don't know. He seems nice enough, a lawyer. I don't really know him all that well, and I don't even remember him from before. It was just a crazy night that when a little too far. It should be a crime to have so many little chapels to get married around here. They know that everyone is here to party, so anything that happens here, shouldn't be pushed. It has been so long that I can't get it annulled, so we have to do it this way.”
“I wish you would've told me because I would've come with you. I've never been to Vegas before.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, something always came up. I'm starting to think that maybe it was a good thing that I didn’t go with you for that one.”
We talked for a little while longer and I hung up with mixed feelings. It had been good to hear from her, but at the same time, I still had a lot weighing on my shoulders that I couldn't share with anyone, not even her. That bothered me.
I went back downstairs to the kitchen to get another glass of wine. Talking to Lisa had me thinking about Jax and the real reason that I was here. I shouldn’t have needed that boost, but apparently, I did, because I only started to feel better when I realized that I was going to figure it out. I had been momentarily sidetracked, that’s all.
“So how is your friend?”
“She is good. I left pretty quickly, and I didn't get to say goodbye to anyone. We had some plans for this weekend that I forgot about.”
“I am glad you are here Candy. It really is good to see you after all this time.”
I didn't get where he was coming from and I was trying to understand. His house was beautiful and huge. He had a driver, butler and most likely a maid as well. Colt with handsome and it was easy to imagine that he had plenty of women at his beck and call. It made no sense why he was holding on to this between us. It had happened so long ago, I just didn't understand it.
“Why have you missed me? We were only together one night.”
“Well, I think we actually went to bed around five or six in the morning. By the time I woke up it was afternoon and you had left. So, it was more like one night and early morning. And to answer your question, I don't know why I miss you. I don't know why I have thought about you all these years, even though you never showed back up. I don't know why I never divorced you. I mean sure, I had no desire to get married again, so it wasn't really an issue, but I should have. I've made a lot of money since we got married and if you were the certain type of person, you could take it all. So, it made no sense for me to keep things the same. But I did, and I don't know why.”
When he talked like that, I wasn't sure how to react. He talked about us in a sense that we were meant to be together or fated in some way, but I didn't believe in fate. I never had and certainly wouldn’t have believed it with him.
I believe that people made their own fate and even though I thought that what me and Jax had together was perfect. I knew in the end that was because we made it that way, not because of any pre-destined life that we had.
“I don't know why you haven't forgotten me either. I
think it's the red hair. It's such a strange color that it just sticks out with people. Most people don't remember my name, but they remember my hair. Silly huh?”
I was babbling for the simple fact that I didn't know what to say and looking at him was impossible, and I had to turn away.
“I remembered more than your hair Candy. With a name like that I don't know how anyone could forget it.”
My name has been forgotten many times and it was more of an insult to injury because of how easy it was to remember. Before Jax, I started to think that I was never going to find the one that I was looking for. My true love.
“I have to admit, you do have a good memory. You even remember what I told you about Dylan. It's kind of funny though, I realize now that Dylan was small potatoes. I can see now that I was naïve to think that it was going to be the worst thing that happened to me.”
“What about the man you have now? The one that you were about to marry? Is he the one for you?”
I felt like I had to justify Jax, and I didn't like the feeling at all. While Jax was perfect, he did have his faults as well. We all did. Perfection was not always perfect, it was a feeling and knowing that no matter what, it didn't matter.
“I think that he is the one for me.”
Chapter 9
Colt
I, of course, didn't believe it to be true. How could she be meant for another man, when I still strongly felt that she was the one for me? Whatever the reason was for us coming together, was still there. I was still drawn to her in a way that I hadn't experienced before, and I was still trying to convince her of it. There was a little bit of frustration in the fact that she didn't feel the same way. It would have made things so much easier.
“And how does he feel about you being here?”
He is fine with it. He trusts me. He knows that whatever it is between us, is nothing that compares to what is between me and him.”