by Linde, K. A.
Hayden forced her legs open wider with one hand as he continued to work. Gasps left her mouth in between the moans. Oh God, she couldn’t hold on any longer. Whatever he was doing right there. Just like that. With his tongue.
Liz’s head snapped back and her body pulsed wonderfully as a climax shot through her. Her body moved against his fingers, trying to keep them inside of her even as he slid out. And she just lay there breathing, exhausted and satisfied.
With a deep breath, Hayden rolled off of her before lying back down next to her. He kissed her forehead and pulled her into his bare chest. When had he lost his shirt? She didn’t even care right then; she just wanted to curl up against him and pass out.
“Lizzie,” he groaned, his breathing still uneven. “I don’t want to push you . . .”
He was so used to her saying no that even though she had looked and acted completely willing to move forward, he was hesitant. He didn’t want to push her away by pushing too hard. But he wanted her. It was all over his face.
And yet as dirty as she felt thinking about Brady in that moment, it all came back to her: the reason she hadn’t moved forward. Brady. She was still hung up on Brady. She couldn’t get him out of her head. She ducked into Hayden’s chest and tried not to think about Brady, but the image of him only came to her stronger.
She wasn’t ready.
Chapter 6
TRUST FOSTERS TRUST
Hey, gorgeous, are you out of class yet?
The text from Hayden flashed on her phone just as Liz was packing up. She shouldered her backpack and turned to leave. She was glad that she only had early classes on Friday.
Just got out.
Lunch? I’m starving, and I miss you.
Liz’s smile quirked on her face. Ever since that night when she had lost herself in him, she had found something in her changing. Even though they had been dating for nearly four months now, she felt what she could only associate with honeymoon butterflies: when in that initial stage of a relationship, all you wanted to do was spend all your time with the other person, and the mere thought of them made you break into a smile . . . yeah, that was where she was at.
If Hayden noticed the subtle changes in her behavior, he didn’t say anything, but he sure responded well to it. They still hadn’t had sex, but she didn’t have the same reluctance anymore. Now she had waited long enough that she just wanted the moment to be right. She didn’t want to walk into his bedroom and be like, Fuck me. Though she couldn’t see Hayden complaining about that either.
Yes. I need food. Where do you want to go?
Home . . .
Liz cracked a smile. Geez. She was giggly. She needed to work on that, but she knew she couldn’t control it.
As she was typing out a response, another message came in, this one from Justin.
Hey, I just got into town. Sorry I’m late. Are we still meeting up today?
She had totally forgotten that Justin was coming in today. She had even forgotten to tell Hayden. She should probably call him to let him know.
Yeah. Top O?
Definitely.
Liz found Hayden’s number in her phone and clicked Send. He answered immediately, “Hey. I’m just leaving the paper now. Where should I meet you?”
“Hey. About that . . .” she said awkwardly. She didn’t know why she would even let this make her uncomfortable. It was just Justin. There had never been anything romantic between them. And it certainly wasn’t like that now. Yet telling Hayden was making her a bit nervous.
She remembered telling Brady about Justin. He had gotten insanely jealous. Their relationship hadn’t even developed past sex at that point, but his jealousy had still struck her even then. It had resurfaced later after she had told him that she had gone out with Hayden in D.C. Liz closed her eyes to push out the memories, but the argument they’d had about Hayden washed over her all at once.
It doesn’t really matter! Didn’t you hear me? He’s not you! This isn’t a competition, Brady. There’s no room for jealousy.
No. She didn’t want him in her head. He hadn’t been there as much lately. She had buried him deep down inside of her where no one else could reach. It was the safest place for him. She hated the moments when life reminded her of him and fissures broke through her tough resolve.
Because the only thing I felt when he kissed me was that I was glad it was out in public. It wasn’t Hayden I wanted. It was you. And if it’s not you, then it doesn’t matter.
If it’s not you, then it doesn’t matter. God . . . she forced her mind away from it. She thought about Hayden and filled the crack with memories of his smiling face, his gentle kisses, his attention and devotion and perfection.
It all happened in a matter of seconds, but it felt like an eternity before she finally responded.
“I, uh . . . totally forgot that Justin was coming into town today and that I was meeting him for lunch,” Liz told Hayden. She waited for his judgment, his jealousy.
“Oh nice! I hope he’s doing all right since the DUI incident last summer. God, that feels like forever ago, doesn’t it?” Hayden asked.
Forever ago. Everything from the summer felt equally as if it had happened yesterday and a lifetime ago. But she could remember the whole summer in vivid detail that she was sure would never go away.
“Yeah,” she agreed, because she didn’t know what else to say. “He’s doing a lot better. Working for a computer software company or something. I’m not really sure.”
“Well, tell him I said hi. I don’t know if he ever really liked me, but I appreciated the work he did for the paper when he was here.”
Oh, Hayden. How could she ever think that he would be jealous? He was perpetually good-natured and saw the best in everyone. She appreciated that quality in him more than ever in that moment.
“I’ll let him know,” she said softly. She didn’t want to be sentimental right now, but it had a tendency to creep up on her. “I have to help Massey with some stuff at the paper before I can head home. Can I see you later?”
“Of course. Come over when you leave the paper. We can hang out then,” he told her.
“That sounds perfect. Is the day over yet?”
Hayden laughed softly. “I wish.”
“See you soon.”
Liz hung up as she rounded the corner to the Top of the Hill, where she was meeting Justin for lunch. It was one of her favorite restaurants in town, with a large balcony overlooking the main city block downtown.
She took the stairs up to the top floor of the building. It was still too cold to sit out on the balcony, so Liz allowed the waitress to direct her to a table. She sipped her water as she waited.
It had been so long since she had seen Justin. She didn’t really know what to expect. They had been friends since freshman year, but sometimes it was hard to be friends with Justin. Half arrogant brainiac, half douche frat boy made for a hard combination. But he was fiercely loyal and had never blamed her for the incident last summer, even though she carried part of the responsibility. She had been wasted at one of Justin’s frat parties and he had offered to drive her home. Unfortunately he had been drunk himself, and after driving through a red light had been pulled over and given a DUI. It had lost him his scholarship and he’d had to leave school.
When Justin walked into the bar and saw her, she broke into a smile. God, she had missed him being around, and she hadn’t really realized it until then. He had been a fixture in her life at UNC, working for the newspaper and taking classes with her since freshman year. She was glad to be reunited.
“Justin!” she said, barreling into him when he got closer.
He laughed and hugged her to him. “Good to see you, Liz.”
“It’s really good to see you too,” she said, pulling away from him and regaining her seat.
Justin looked professional in a way he never had
in college in what looked like a brand-new suit and tie. His hair was cut shorter and brushed off of his face. She couldn’t see Justin wanting to be in a suit all the time. He was more of a khakis, polos, and boat shoes kind of guy.
The waitress appeared immediately, they ordered food and drinks, and then she disappeared just as quickly.
“You look great,” Justin said, a smug look on his face.
Liz managed not to roll her eyes. What did he want? Justin didn’t dole out compliments lightly. “Thanks. How is the new job?”
“A drag, but it pays well.”
“Yeah?” She knew there was a hitch already. She just waited for him to let the other shoe drop. “What is the company exactly?”
“It’s just a software company run by three guys. They wanted to make a program for students and teachers to install on their computers to live-stream from multiple locations on or off campus while still remaining interactive.”
“Well, that sounds cool,” she admitted.
“Yeah. I was selected online to do some testing for the program to make a few easy bucks. I took what they had redesigned and added a few key features of my own . . .”
“Wow. That’s fantastic. I bet professors like it.”
“They love it. Or at least, the three universities that have already purchased the software to try in their classrooms love it,” Justin told her. “And I’m supposed to pitch it to UNC this afternoon. Kind of ironic, right? UNC dropout sells innovative software to university system.” He chuckled to himself. “Anyway, that’s not my endgame.”
Their orders arrived, and Liz waited patiently for the waitress to leave again, digging her fork into her food. “So, what is your endgame?” she asked.
“I want to own my own company.”
“What do you want to do when you work for yourself?”
“I’m working on creating some way to put in place a filtering mechanism on YouTube videos, so I could get past all of the stuff that people watch that isn’t actually good and get straight to the good stuff. I designed the reviewing process myself, primarily to see how easy it was to find my own videos through it. I want to take it a step further and give it a social media component, form a central rating system, and then connect that to people’s YouTube accounts.”
“And you can do all of this? I seriously thought you were just a video expert,” she asked, surprised by his genius.
Justin shook his head. “I was majoring in photojournalism because I was already a programmer. My dad’s a programmer and I grew up on a computer.”
“Well, I think you should go for it.” She smiled back at him encouragingly.
“Will you help me?”
“Wh-what?” she stammered. What could he possibly want her help with? Sounded as if he had it all pretty much covered.
“I want to include a blogging component to the site and I need a writer. You and I both know I’m not that good with writing. I can’t express my ideas like you can. I know how much influence your pieces have in the paper, and I know you get A’s in all of your writing classes. I need someone that I trust to help, to keep people interested, to feed the buzz.”
He wanted her to help him with the start-up company he hadn’t even started? She didn’t know when she would ever find time for that amid her busy schedule.
“I . . . I don’t know,” she said.
“Come on. You’re perfect. And I trust you,” he said earnestly.
“Justin, I appreciate you considering me for this, but I’m swamped at school. There’s no way I could dedicate the amount of time you would need for this kind of project.”
“It wouldn’t be that much to begin with.”
“Next year I’ll be editor.” The words thrilled her when they left her mouth. She hadn’t said that out loud yet, and it felt right. “I’ll have my internship for the Morehead scholarship. It’s too much . . .”
“Just think about it. There’s plenty of time.”
“All right, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.” She didn’t like turning him down when he seemed so set on the course of action, but she didn’t think she could make it work.
The topic shifted away from Justin’s new projects as they finished their meal, but her mind was running a thousand miles a minute. She wished she had more time.
Justin picked up the tab even when she insisted that they split it. He just laughed and paid with a business credit card. They walked out together and he offered to drop her off at the paper, which she declined. It was a short distance, and he had to prepare for his meeting with the university.
She reached the newspaper without remembering anything about the walk. Massey had already left for the day, but Savannah was still milling around the office. Liz waved as she plopped down into the seat across from her.
“Lost in thought?” Savannah mused, typing away at her computer.
“Yeah. Just thinking about something I was talking to a friend about,” Liz told her. “Did Massey get through the reports for Monday?”
Savannah laughed. “Hardly. I don’t even want to look at the in-box.”
“Great,” Liz said, as she began working.
People filtered in and out of the office throughout the remainder of the afternoon, but Savannah was a constant presence, sneaking downstairs to get coffee and commiserating about the amount of work left over. Someone turned the television on at some point, but Liz didn’t even bother to pay attention to it. She dissected news venues daily in her classes.
But Brady Maxwell’s voice snapped her straight to attention. God, how long had it been since she had heard his voice? It had been blissfully quiet up until his induction into Congress at the end of January, and she had managed to avoid him entirely by keeping her TV turned off.
Her eyes followed his chiseled features, those dark brown eyes, the curve of his smile, and the assurance in his black suit, crisp button-down, and blue tie. He was without a doubt the most attractive man she had ever laid eyes on, and she couldn’t stop staring. She swam in a mist of emotion that clouded her brain, keeping her rooted to the present, but still trapped in his penetrating stare . . . as if he could see her right now.
Then he was gone, his speech over, and the news outlet flashed a series of pictures of him with the same girl over and over and over. The same skinny brunette she had seen in the green gown on New Year’s Eve. He wasn’t pictured with anyone else.
Her heart stopped beating. Who was this girl?
Brady’s press secretary, Heather, appeared next, standing on a stage, answering questions to a press room in D.C. The clip only showed one question, though.
“Ms. Ferrington, can you comment on Representative Maxwell’s bachelor status? He has appeared several times with the same woman, and as we all know, it’s not common for the Congressman to stick to just one.”
The crowd laughed lightly, but Liz just cringed.
Heather smiled. She had been prepped for the question, no doubt. “Representative Maxwell has no comment but to say that whatever relationship he has with Miss Erin Edwards is business of his own, and he would prefer to keep his personal life personal, ladies and gentlemen.”
Liz felt as if her eyes might pop out of their sockets. That was perfectly planned—a stunt by the campaign to spotlight his new relationship. Was it just a ploy, though? It didn’t sound like Brady, but Christ, what did she know about Brady Maxwell?
All she knew was the name that was going to be on everyone’s lips from here on out: Erin Edwards.
Chapter 7
CONFLICT OF INTEREST
Earth to Liz. Earth to Liz,” Savannah said a moment later, waving her hand in front of Liz’s face. “Are you alive in there?”
“What? Oh, yeah, sorry. Zoned out, I guess,” Liz muttered.
“Happens. I was just about to get out of here. Are you finished?” Savannah walked back to her
desk and grabbed her purse.
Liz stared at her computer blankly. Well, she wasn’t going to get any work done now. “Yeah, I suppose I am.”
She started packing her bag up while her mind worked overtime. Who the hell was Erin Edwards? The girl could be a stunt, but Brady had said that he wouldn’t ever let Heather go that far. She couldn’t pick someone for him to date . . . for him to marry. He agreed to be set up for events out of convenience, but that was where he drew the line. How had they met? Did he still think about Liz?
No, it clearly didn’t matter.
“Is he dating that girl?” Liz blurted out before she could stop herself.
Savannah turned back to face her. Her face was a mask in indifference, and if Liz hadn’t worked with her every day for the past seven months, she wouldn’t have known the other girl was uncomfortable with the question. Liz knew Savannah didn’t like to talk about her family, but she needed someone to tell her whether what they were showing on the news was a false trail . . . or if Brady really had moved on.
“Liz . . . you know I can’t talk about it. It’s a conflict of interest if I tell you and then you write about it. Sorry.”
“No, I know,” Liz said. She sighed and looked away, hoping Savannah didn’t notice the heat rising in her face. “I wasn’t planning to write about it. I mean, no offense, but right now he’s old news, with the campaign being over and him a freshman congressman. I was merely curious.”
Damn. How had she kept her tone neutral? Brady Maxwell was never old news. He was so hot that she could put him in any paper and make people read about him, but she didn’t, because most of the time it just hurt too much. And really, he had just gotten into office, so there wasn’t much to cover. Either way, she just hoped she could convince Savannah.
“None taken,” Savannah said with a laugh that told Liz she was relaxing. “I will tell you, though, it’s so weird having my dad and Brady in D.C. now. I always knew Brady would get there, but I’m not used to him being gone.”