He raised an eyebrow. He wanted lots of things. Especially as he looked at her standing there, trying her hardest not to be charmed by his home. For instance, he wanted to undress her and make love to her in front of the fireplace. Or take her upstairs and reacquaint her with how good they were together in a shower. Or perhaps take her outside and introduce her to the wonders of a steamy hot tub...
But he also wanted to keep his head on his shoulders. ‘Tea will be fine. Thank you.’
He followed her into the kitchen and watched her get acquainted with where he kept everything. She opened cupboards and drawers, and he found himself smiling at her obvious disgust that all his mugs looked like Christmas puddings because last week he’d swapped them with his normal ones for the festive season.
She looked at the box of teabags and scrunched up her face as she sniffed at it. ‘What flavour is this tea?’
‘Spiced apple and pear with ginger.’
‘Seriously?’
‘Wait till you try it. Don’t add sugar—add a splash of this.’ He passed her some maple syrup.
‘You’ll rot your teeth.’
‘It’s just for special occasions.’
‘Such as?’
‘Christmas, Merry. Christmas. Come on, tell me—why do you hate it so much? Because you were abandoned at Christmas? I seem to remember you telling me that.’
She passed him his tea and leant back against the kitchen counter. ‘I used to love Christmas. The promise of it...what it meant.’
‘So what happened?’
She shook her head, as if she couldn’t quite believe she was going to tell him her story. ‘A guy happened.’
He nodded in understanding. As he’d suspected. And that only gave strength as to his own reasons for staying single. You let people in, you let yourself become vulnerable and people hurt you. It always happened. Staying out of relationships was definitely the way to go.
But then he looked down at her belly. Thought about the baby growing there. He couldn’t stay out of that relationship, could he? He might keep to himself, but he was a decent person and he would take care of his responsibilities.
‘I apologise on behalf of all menfolk.’ He smiled and raised his cup to her as if in a toast.
‘And now another bloke has got me pregnant and I’m going to be a single mother.’
‘It takes two, Merry. And we did use protection.’
‘I know that!’
‘You plan on staying in England?’
She laughed. ‘You expect me to move to Iceland?’
‘No.’
Yes.
The idea of knowing he would have a child in this world but not be able to see it was disturbing to him now that he thought about it. It had been a long time since he’d had a family, and now...
He smiled at himself—at the craziness of the situation. Just this morning it had been life as usual—no relationships, no commitments—and he had been happy. And tonight...? Tonight he was worrying about which country his child would live in, because he wanted to see it every day.
I do. I want to see it every day.
It would never have been his decision to be a father. He’d never wanted to get involved with anyone—that had always been his modus operandi. But now that it was a possibility—was real—he was surprised to discover he had opinions on the matter.
He was an all-in kind of a guy when he did something. He was fully committed to his work at the hospital. Being a paediatric doctor was his life! So the idea of only half-heartedly being a father was not one he could consolidate in his mind. That wasn’t him. Sending money and birthday cards would not be enough. He wanted to be involved.
‘Good. Because my life is in England,’ Merry said.
‘It could be here.’
‘In the land of ice and snow? I don’t think so!’
‘You’ll grow to love it. Trust me.’
‘I’m not uprooting my entire life to move here because a man wants me to.’
‘Then do it because the father of your child has asked you to.’ He stared hard at her, wanting to show her he was serious.
She stared back at him and he could see that she was frightened. It was written all over her face. He didn’t like seeing her scared. He didn’t like seeing anyone feel that way. He fought the urge to cross over to her and pull her close, because he knew she didn’t need that right now and would not appreciate it. She would view it as him trying to press his wishes on her.
A man had hurt her. Badly. He didn’t know exactly how, but he did know that if he stood any chance of having his child in his life he needed to persuade this woman who stirred his blood that she could have a life here. He couldn’t go to England. Iceland ran through his veins! He had history here. Roots. And...and it was a good place to raise a child.
I’m crazy to even consider this!
But he knew he had to.
Kristjan had lost the family he’d once had, and he had often yearned to have someone. When he had watched those other kids at the school gates running into their parents’ loving arms. Watched them get scooped up and have kisses planted on their cheeks. He’d had that. Once.
His aunt and uncle had taken him in for a little while, but it had never been the same. They’d never wanted kids, and to suddenly find themselves parents had been a difficult transition for them.
They’d tried so hard. But he had known he was a burden to them. An extra struggle, both financial and emotional. He had felt like a spare part, and he’d been so desperate for love he had been left feeling angry. He’d rebelled as a teenager. That hadn’t gone down well! Getting into trouble over silly things... he’d ended up in care. But that anger had fuelled him to stand alone and live his life his way.
He wanted more for his own child.
His child would have its father waiting for him or her at the school gates, and Kristjan knew he would be the type of father to scoop his child up into his arms and smother it with kisses!
‘Let me prove it to you,’ he said.
‘Prove what?’
‘That you and the baby could have a good life here in this country.’
She cradled her Christmas pudding mug in both hands and stared at him. Considered him. ‘You want to be part of its life?’
‘I do.’
Had she heard his voice waver? He had. But this meant something to him. Even with the short time he’d known about it, he knew he needed to be a part of this baby’s life. ‘Give me until the New Year. If you’re not convinced, then go home to England and we’ll sort something out.’
She stared at him for an age and he couldn’t read her. Would she give him this chance? Would she stay?
He had no idea right now just how exactly he was going to prove to her that it would be worth her moving to another country on a permanent basis, but he knew he had to give it a try.
It was Christmas! The season of goodwill to all men and women—and babies. She had to give him a chance, right? She had to give him a chance to know his child. To love his child. Every day.
‘All right.’
‘All right?’
‘I’ll give you until the road clears, then I’m going. Understood?’
He nodded, knowing that the season and the weather were on his side. At this time of year most of the tourists has already arrived, well in advance of Christmas, and once the roads were impassable they would be like that for a long time. If he kept her busy with work, and showed her all the wonders of this place, then maybe she wouldn’t have time to check weather reports and road conditions because she’d be falling in love.
He just had to show her the truth and the beauty of the place.
He would make her fall in love with being here.
* * *
A knock on the bedroom door had her slowly waking from a deep slumber. She’d never slept
so well before. This bed was unbelievable! The mattress wasn’t too hard, the blankets were thick and warm, and on top there was a pure white faux fur-lined topper.
After going into her room last night to settle down, she’d put on her pyjamas and then run her fingers through the topper as she passed by, unable to believe that this luxurious bedroom was to be hers! And the best part was it didn’t look like a Christmas grotto in here. Kristjan’s guest room had been minimally decorated—and that said a lot, considering how the rest of the house looked.
There were thick white candles on the windowsill, a garland of holly over the small fireplace that contained a log burner, and a set of snowmen like Russian dolls on her bedside table. That was it. She could cope with that amount of decoration. That was enough Christmas.
And so she’d gone to sleep and slept like the dead until now, when Kristjan had knocked at her door and woken her.
‘Come in.’
He opened the door with a smile and brought in a breakfast tray, laid it on her lap. There were scrambled eggs and toast, hot chocolate in a mug shaped like a Christmas present, a bowl of muesli with a small jug of milk, and in a small bud vase a sprig of something that looked like mistletoe.
She picked it up and raised an eyebrow at him. ‘What’s this for?’
‘For decoration. Don’t eat that. It’s poisonous.’ He smiled.
She smiled back and propped herself up in bed properly, preparing to tuck herself in, then realised that he was just standing at the side of her bed staring at her, dressed in a very nice, tight pair of dark jeans and a checked shirt.
‘Are you going to watch me eat?’
He sat on the edge of the bed and pinched a triangle of toast. ‘No. I’m going to go and get my own breakfast in just a minute.’
‘Right... Am I going to get breakfast in bed every morning?’
He smiled. ‘Would that persuade you to stay?’
‘I’m already staying.’
‘I meant after.’
She took a sip of the hot chocolate. It was perfect. ‘It will take more than a breakfast tray to get me to uproot everything.’
‘Ah... Okay. And just what exactly is “everything”? Just so I know what I’m in competition with?’
She faltered before she responded. It wasn’t as if she could say family. Her adoptive mother was dead. And her adoptive father... Well, he’d left years ago. When it had all got too much for him. He’d been a coward. He’d not been able to stay and watch the progression of the disease that had been slowly killing his wife and had instead left her to do so.
Life had been cruel to Merry. Her real mother had abandoned her and her adopted one had faded, day by day, until death had enveloped her with its icy grip and taken even that relationship away from her. It had made her think that maybe she was destined always to be alone?
That was why this was such a shock. The fact that Kristjan wanted to be involved with her baby. Was trying to keep her here. There wasn’t much left for her at home any more, except bad memories. But...
‘My friends. My job...’
He nodded and stood up again, swallowing the last of the toast he’d pinched, licking his fingertips to get at the melted butter, and she felt her loins curl with lust at the image. She knew what that tongue could do, applied to all the right places...
‘All right. Enjoy your breakfast. We need to be at work in one hour.’
‘Okay.’
He headed out of the bedroom.
‘Kristjan?’
He turned. ‘Yes?’
‘Thank you. For breakfast in bed. It was very kind of you.’
He smiled at her and nodded. ‘You’re very welcome, Merry.’ And then he was gone.
She heard his big form going down the stairs and she couldn’t help but think, as she had last night, about what she’d agreed to. Staying here until after Christmas. Letting him try to show her that it might be worthwhile for her to stay here.
She didn’t want to tell him that her home, back in Brighton, was a tiny flat with just a few pieces of furniture. A place she barely ever stayed at, because she worked so much. Or that her downstairs neighbour thought nothing of playing rock music into the early hours of the morning. Or that she’d lost most of her friends when she’d moved there to get away from her life with Mark.
Yes, she had her job—but she could do that anywhere. Her colleagues were great, but she never socialised with them. Unless you counted the Christmas party, and she’d never really enjoyed that—watching people pair up with people they wouldn’t normally look at, just because the Christmas spirit had got into them.
And now Kristjan wanted to try and give her some Christmas spirit. By showing her the joys of living in Snowy Peak.
He wanted to be part of this baby’s life—which was something of a shock. A small part of her was pleased that he cared, but another part was terrified.
What if he was like her adoptive father? What if he left when the going got difficult? If it all got too hard?
Babies were hard work. It wasn’t all cute pictures on social media showing sleeping babies inside giant flowers. It was explosive diarrhoea and spit-up, and crying into the long hours of the night.
Heck, what if she couldn’t do it? Her own mother had failed and walked away. What was there to say that she would make a good mother? It was hardly in her genes, was it?
The fear of the future, of the unknown, cast a long, dark shadow...
CHAPTER FIVE
‘ARE YOU READY? We need to get going.’
Merry was putting on her borrowed snow boots for the walk from Kristjan’s house to the hospital. It had taken them a good twenty-minutes to get there last night in the thick snow, and she’d been amazed at the sight of the starry sky. It looked different here than it did in England—clearer...the stars brighter.
Walking behind the tall hulk that was Kristjan, she had struggled to keep up with him. He was used to this snow. She wasn’t. A couple of times he’d had to stop to let her catch up, and at one point he’d had to take her hand and help her through a particularly deep patch of ice-white snow.
‘Nearly ready. I just need my coat.’
‘Wrap up warm—we’re not going straight to the hospital.’
He pulled a thick knitted beanie hat onto his head and opened the door as she zipped up the coat he’d lent her.
‘We’re not?’
‘No. We’ve been called out to an emergency.’
‘Oh!’
She thought about that. An emergency? With the roads all blocked? How would they get there?
‘What are you like with dogs?’
She raised her eyebrows. ‘Dogs?’
He smiled enigmatically and went outside. Merry followed and a pack of nine dogs, all tethered to one another, came galloping around the end of the street, pulling a fur-lined sled behind it.
Merry stood watching in awe. The dogs were the kind of huskies that she’d seen on television once, in a mix of colours—grey, white, brown. The front dog, leading, was solid black and looked like a wolf.
‘You’ve got to be kidding me?’
Kristjan grinned at her. ‘I couldn’t get any flying reindeer. Too short notice.’
She watched as Kristjan took control of the reins from the driver who had just stepped off.
‘This is Henrik. He owns the pack.’
She looked at the dogs’ owner, wondering what type of person had a pack of dogs at his beck and call?
‘Are you coming?’
She could easily have just stood there, gawping at the dogs for ages, but she knew she had to get a grip. Somewhere there was a child, hurt or sick, and with every second she stood there, being amazed, that child suffered a little bit more.
She clambered onto the sled under the furs and found her feet touching boxes and packs. Lifting the furs,
she saw that the sled was loaded with medical equipment.
‘So, you always have this thing ready to go?’
Kristjan grinned and nodded. ‘Yah!’ he yelled, and cracked the reins.
The dogs began to run and Merry gasped in delight as she was pulled down the centre of the street by the team of dogs. Powdery snow was spraying into her face, but it didn’t matter. This was exhilarating!
They raced past shops and homes, all decorated for Christmas. She saw fairy lights and Christmas trees everywhere. On one corner there was a giant snowman, and further down someone who clearly had a bit more skill in sculpting snow had made a snow castle worthy of a princess!
Soon the dogs had pulled them out of town and towards Wonderland, where all those tourists took their kids to meet Father Christmas and enjoy the Christmassy village. They passed through an arch made entirely out of reindeers’ antlers and down what looked like it could have been a road before the snow hit.
Suddenly the dogs turned—guided by Kristjan, no doubt—and they went off-road, through a huge pile of snow that sprayed her face with more cold powder, and then moved onwards towards the dark pine trees and forest beyond.
Merry could barely breathe. This was unlike anything she had ever experienced! She’d thought it would be a bumpy ride, but it wasn’t as bad as she’d expected, and she found she had to stifle the need to scream in delight and yell at Kristjan to go faster.
The bells on the dogs’ reins jingled as they ran and now, up ahead, she could see a small campsite, where a fire was crackling away, sending a plume of smoke up and into the dark sky.
Of course, she thought. They won’t get daylight here until much later.
Behind her, Kristjan must have pulled on the reins to make the dogs halt, as their run slowly became a trot, before they stilled, panting hot breaths into the icy air.
‘You okay?’ Kristjan stepped off the back of the sled and held out a gloved hand for her to get out.
‘I’m good!’
She wanted to say more. To say that she’d found the experience on the sled exhilarating! But she knew they were here to work, and he would appreciate that even more.
The Icelandic Doc's Baby Surprise Page 4