by Dave Hazel
“I appreciate that Myk, but I know it’s because I’m a believer. It’s because I’m a proclaiming born again, Spirit filled, Bible believing Christian,” Ski declared and his gloom seem to disappear. “I know God has called me to be a missionary in Towbar’s world, but there is an enemy at work to stop me.”
“See if you wouldn’t talk like that I think--”
“I’m not going to deny the truth,” Ski cut him off and sounded shocked. “And I’m not going to pretend to be something that I’m not just to fool some people to allow me to go back with you.”
“I tried to argue that you’re going there to help Towbar’s people.”
“Which is true, but my main purpose is to reach the lost for my LORD and Savior Jesus Christ.”
“See Ski, that’s what scares them. When you talk like that, they’re afraid you’re gonna shove your beliefs down someone else’s throat and make it look like the government or the military is approving of it. I told them I wanna bring you back, but they said since you are not out of the Air Force you would be AWOL. So if you wanna sneak back, I’ll take you. But technically you’ll be breaking the law. If you wanna break the law to do your God thing, I’m okay with that,” Mykal snickered. “You know I never followed the rules so I don’t give a shit. Ooops, I mean I don’t give a crap.”
“Oh my. Now I just don’t know what to do. I know God has called me to minister to that lost people group, but I also know God doesn’t want me to sin in order to carry out my mission.”
“Do you think maybe you heard wrong?” Mykal asked.
The silence spoke volumes. “No, I know what God has placed on my heart. I can’t break the law. I need to pray about this,” Ski said with a heavy sadness in his words. “The timing may not be right,” he sighed in defeat.
“Well, just so you know Ski, I don’t wanna break my word to you, so if you want me to sneak you back I’ll gladly take you back. What are they gonna do? Tell me I can’t go?” He laughed. “They need me.”
“Do you know when you’re leaving?” Ski asked as if he hadn’t heard Mykal’s suggestion of breaking the law and defying authority.
“Not yet. Listen Ski, I don’t really understand all your God stuff and I don’t mean that in a bad way. I just don’t understand. But why would God even care about such a backward barbaric people? Are you really sure God does care about those people?”
“Yes Myk,” Ski answered and laughed slightly. “See, you’re making the mistake like most people do, that you think God would be a respecter of ‘persons’. That God would care more about this group and not care so much about that group. But the truth is everything in existence is His creation so He cares about them. I believe God has laid it on my heart to share with those people that His Son Jesus died for their sins just like Jesus died for the sins of you and me. Just because we wouldn’t think--”
“Sorry Ski, I gotta stop you,” Mykal interrupted him and rolled his eyes. He regretted asking Ski a question involving God, religion or religious matters. ‘Once you ask him a question he’s just like a broken water faucet, you can’t get it to stop,’ Mykal thought and chuckled at Ski’s committed persistence. “I’m waiting for some very important phone calls.”
“Oh I understand. I will continue to pray about this. I know God had laid this on my heart and if He did, He will have to work this out.”
“I’ll sneak you back if you really want me to,” Mykal offered. “And I mean that. All you gotta do is show up as we’re starting to get everything going and I’ll sneak you with me. There will be so much going on that they wouldn’t notice if you’re there in uniform and if you’re with me, everyone will ‘know’ you’re supposed to be there.”
“I truly appreciate your offer Myk, but if I broke the law that would hurt my witness and then it would allow God’s enemies to call me a hypocrite. I can’t do that. I don’t know, maybe I did hear wrong and maybe I’m not supposed to go,” Ski said with an obvious pout in his disappointed tone.
2.
“Where are the boys?” Mykal asked when Pam entered the front door by herself.
“I left them at Ma and Pa’s. I wasn’t sure how much more time we had together. I wanted to make sure we had some us time,” she said with a sexy smile.
“I’m fine with that, but I really wanna see the boys before I have to go back.”
“I’ll make sure you say good-bye to them. And if you don’t leave today I’ll bring them home a little later.”
“Alright,” he said and couldn’t help but look down.
“What’s wrong Myk?”
“Honey, I’m scared and I’m worried,” he whispered.
“Why? Did something happen?”
“No,” he said and shook his head with his finger to his lips. He feared his home was still bugged. He pulled her close and whispered into her ear. “When I left Towbar’s world it was bad like I told you. But I saw dragons flying around. They and their riders were looking for something or someone. I honestly thought they were looking for me cuz I’m the key to getting Towbar’s people our help,” he said and didn’t mention anything about the special ring. “But now, the more I think about it, I really think they were looking for Doninka cuz she’s the King’s daughter.”
“The princess who has a crush on you?” Pam asked with a playful jealousy. “The one who wanted you to stay in Towbar’s world?”
“Yes,” he sighed and shook his head. “You know you’re the only one for me. But seriously honey, she was looking for Towbar. One of their generals told her to find Towbar cuz someone back at Beramus, which is their capital city, was going to kill her. She had twenty-one trusted soldiers with her, but all it takes is just one madman. And I believe her brother is behind it, but that’s neither here nor there,” he snapped more at himself. “When I saw her, I told her Towbar was gone and something told me to bring her here cuz she would be safe. I didn’t bring her here cuz I was worried how it would look and I was worried something might happen to her while she was here. I came up with a whole list of reasons why I shouldn’t bring her here and now I’m worried those riders on the dragons were actually looking for her. If something has happened to her, it’s my fault, cuz I coulda easily brought her here.”
“It’s not your fault. Don’t put that guilt on you,” Pam demanded with her soft pretty voice.
“I had one of my gut feelings telling me I shoulda brought her back here. Part of me didn’t want to put up with what others might think.”
“I trust you. I wouldn’t have thought anything wrong,” Pam said.
“I know. I’m not worried what you woulda thought, cuz I wouldn’t do anything wrong. But I didn’t want others to think I was sneaking around behind your back. Plus, big headed me, I was worried she might look at it more than me just being a friend to help her. I didn’t want to lead her on. Damn it,” he sighed with resentment at his selfish reasoning. “The poor girl looked scared and she wanted Towbar but he was gone to the other side of the world. If anything happened to her I’ll never forgive myself. I shoulda protected her. Those damn dragons were vicious. I watched them rip men apart and their riders were bad news too. They weren’t human.”
“Mykal, you’re a good man. Don’t beat yourself up,” Pam said and gently hugged onto him.
“I can’t help it. I’m dealing with so much guilt over so many people and so many things. I know some of it isn’t my doing,” he sighed and rested his chin on the top of her head while he hugged her. “Doc Cannon said that I am struggling with survivor’s guilt. I guess that’s true, but I feel like this is all my fault because of my stupid selfish reasons.”
“I think she’ll be okay,” Pam said softly to ease his mind. “You’ll see when you get there. You said she had twenty-one soldiers with her. Mykal, I want you to believe in yourself. You are a good man.”
“I appreciate what you’re trying to do honey,” he said with a loving smile because she didn’t have any idea about his dark side. Though Pam tried to help she had no id
ea how bad the situation was back at the Pass. “I love you, but I’m still struggling with the deaths of Boris, Denny, Kurt, Rich, Franklin Perry and a few others back there. The list of dead goes on and on.”
“Is that why you still wake up every night with nightmares?” She asked with a sympathetic expression.
“That’s part of it.”
“But Boris committed suicide in prison for the horrible crimes he committed,” she said in an attempt to ease some of the burden from Mykal’s shoulders.
“I know,” he said to play off the fact Boris’s death had been faked by Percy to enable Mykal to take Boris back to Towbar’s world. “But Boris played a big part of the original 37 days when we were lost for the first time.”
“Do any of the doctors think the nightmares will ease up or stop any time soon?” She asked with a genuine concern.
“I don’t know,” he sighed again because that was the least of his worries at the moment. “But I think the nightmares are cuz of all the stuff I’ve seen since I’ve gone to Towbar’s world. You can’t imagine what the Sosos are like. The things I saw during my first few days still blow me away,” he said and shook his head in disbelief. “Doc Cannon wanted to deal with it by putting me on meds but I said no friggin way. Ski, the Jesus fanatic says the only way to deal with those kinds of horrors is to give them over to God, but I don’t understand what the hell he even means by that. Does God erase them from your memory? I don’t get it.”
“When you are gone, I go to church with my parents. They pray for you and I pray for you too. We pray that God will take all this away and that we will go back to being a normal, happy, family. I just want you to know Mykal, as much as I want to help you, this seems so foreign to me. I know you live it and you’ve gone through all these strange things, but it’s not real to me. Not real in the sense I haven’t been there. It reminds me of something similar to a movie you’ve watched several times but I haven’t seen it. You talk about all these things and I’m totally clueless. I don’t want to be clueless because I want to help you, but I can’t help and I feel worthless in my attempts to help you,” she added with increased sadness.
“You’re not clueless,” he said with a loving smile and pulled her close. “You are the one that gives me the strength I need when I feel I can’t go on. You are what keeps me going when I wanna give up and throw in the towel and say to hell with it all. So you are definitely not worthless in helping me. Please, don’t ever think that. You do more than you can imagine by just being you and being there for me,” he added and squeezed her tighter.
“I’ll always be here for you,” she said and kissed him. “I know you will never give up because you’re a good man and will always do what is right.”
“Honey, I don’t wanna talk about this,” he replied awkwardly. He didn’t want the truth he knew to ruin his mood. “But I’m not a good man. I’ve done some horrible things in Towbar’s world,” he whispered and put his finger to his lips. “I’m just worried about what the government is gonna do once this is all over. Shhh! Don’t say anything,” he whispered again before she could get worked up. “Let’s go upstairs,” he said and looked at the special ring on his middle finger. Though love making was at the forefront of his mind, he desperately felt he needed to turn invisible.
3.
“Well, I feel a whole lot better,” Mykal said to Pam as he hung up the phone. “That was my contact in DC, Percy. He said everything’s a go. We got a green light. Hopefully, and Percy stressed the word hopefully, we’ll be able to leave tomorrow.”
“That’s great and that’s terrible,” Pam said with a pout. “But did they get you all that you requested?”
“From what I understand they have most of it already here on Minot,” he said referring to the Air Force Base. “It sounds like they have been sending in people and equipment from all over and putting them on secret standby. I spoke to a couple of generals that Major Chick had me call. It seems like they must have lit a fire under someone’s ass.”
“I still wish there was a way they could go and you could stay here at home,” she said with a weak smile.
“Spoken like a true selfish wife,” he laughed playfully.
“Selfish?” She scoffed. “Because I love my husband and I want him here with me?”
“You know I’m only joking,” he laughed at her again. “But hey, have you had a chance to talk to Jana or Cindy? How are Jake and Larry doing?”
“Oh my, how could I have forgotten? I will be right back. I have to give you something.”
“What is it?” Mykal asked while Pam ran to the door to go outside. He was surprised to see her return with a wrapped gift. “What the hell is this?”
“I was supposed to give this to you. It’s from Jake,” Pam said while Mykal ripped into the box. “Jake said since you were going back you would need this much more than he would.”
“Awh,” Mykal sighed with gratitude. It was the magic dagger he gave to Jake. He was surprised that he couldn’t see the yellow glow until he opened the wrapping. “If I don’t get a chance to talk to Jake before I leave, I need you to make sure you tell Jake I’m more grateful than words can describe. This just made my day.”
“Over a knife?” Pam asked.
“There is a lot of sentimental value to it,” he fabricated so he wouldn’t have to explain about the magical properties.
“I will let him know,” Pam said and shrugged.
“How are they doing?”
“Jana said Jake is doing great. Larry is doing great too. Jana is so grateful to have Jake home and she wanted me to thank you a million times because you told her you would make sure he made it back home if he was alive. It sounds like he is going to have a couple more surgeries on his leg, but they said eventually he will get back to normal. And Cindy told me that Larry’s attitude toward her and the kids has made a dramatic turn around. You know the kids are from her first marriage, right?” She continued when Mykal nodded. “Cindy said he cried in her arms and couldn’t express how much he missed her and the kids. Larry was so afraid he would never see them again. He said he would change everything about himself and his selfish attitude. Larry also told her that being stuck in Towbar’s world gave him a glimpse of what his life without her would be like, so now he’s a new man.”
“Freakin tough guy my ass,” Mykal said with a teasing laugh. “I’m joking. I’m glad he’s back and happy to be home.”
“Sam asked his girlfriend to marry him and they ran down to the court house even before he went to have surgery on his arm. They said they were going to have a regular wedding after everything calms down and when they could get all the relatives together. All of them are going through the media blitz that you went through. Well, it’s not as bad as what you went through, but they’re getting all kinds of attention they never expected.”
“Good for them,” Mykal said and nodded with a smile, but didn’t want any part of that media circus.
“I know you haven’t been watching the news or listening to the radio or reading the papers, but all the people who were rescued are all over the news as well. Every single person says they owe you a very, very special thank you. They all said because of you and Towbar, and Towbar One of course, they are alive and well. Some of their stories of what happened to them while the Sosos had them prisoner are unbelievable in a horrific way. My goodness Myk, my heart nearly dropped when I heard that you were part of the team that snuck into the Soso camp to rescue them. It scared me and also made me even more proud of you than ever before. You didn’t mention any of that stuff when you came back before Christmas.”
“I didn’t want you to worry your pretty little face over it,” he said and kissed her lips.
“No, but seriously Myk, this makes me see a whole new you. It makes me look at you differently in a positive way. I know you have never been afraid or a coward to do anything if it is needed to be done, but the things I’ve been hearing, it makes me want to cry because you don’t brag about yourself
. I am so proud of you honey,” she said and Pam’s eyes filled with tears. “You are a good man, and your boys are going to have a great role model to look up to.”
Mykal stopped and that sentence made him swallow hard. ‘I’m not a friggin role model,’ he thought. His thoughts continued while she spoke. ‘I was pushed into the things I had to do. It was all about survival so I could be with Pam and my two little buddies. I’m not a good man, but I’m not a friggin monster either,’ he contemplated. ‘I can change after we get through the war. I’ll have to. My boys need me.’
“Did you hear me?” She asked.
“Huh? I’m sorry you made me think about something. What did you say?”
“With all the news coverage and the graphic details and descriptions of what happened to the people you rescued from the Sosos, the people of the entire nation have turned very sympathetic towards the women and children of Towbar’s land. They want our government to save Towbar’s people from those barbarians. They spoke of those who died and they shared things that you would only think could come from a horror movie. The things they shared were just awful and terrible,” she sighed and shook her head. “I think they said the latest polls about doing more for Towbar’s people are almost up there where the numbers were the first time. The people want our government to help Towbar’s people.”
“Good, maybe that’s why we got the green light,” Mykal said and smiled. “I’ll betcha those generals I called are pushing for immediate action. I guess I’m still considered a big shot,” he joked. “But those wimpy ass, fake ass, politicians who are swayed by the damn polls and not convicted by what is right finally buckled. Some of the creeps on Capitol Hill were making it difficult to get more stuff to go back. But it’s funny how their attitudes change when the polls make them look bad.”
“You joke around about being a big shot, but in some ways my Mykal Graves,” she said and nuzzled close to his face, “you are like a movie star. I still have people who come up to me and ask if I can get an autograph from you. And some want an autograph of you and Towbar together, but most want just your autograph.”