by Schow, Ryan
“I wish I could put together a proper meal,” she said with her sweet, trademark voice, “especially after everything you two are doing for us.”
“This is more than enough, Orbey,” Ryker said, hugging her. “You’re a better human being than all of us and you don’t deserve this kind of heartache.”
Orbey’s eyes began to water again, and Ryker apologized.
“Is Harper up at the house?” Logan asked, trying to distract her from her grief.
“She went to find Dr. Quinn,” Orbey said, discretely wiping her eyes. “Stephani’s injuries are pretty bad, plus you boys need a look over.”
He didn’t care about his injuries just then. He was worried about Harper. She said she was going to join them in digging the graves, but he hadn’t seen her since the barn. Was she so mad at him that she was refusing to help? Is that why she didn’t say anything before leaving?
“We’ll be fine,” Ryker said, still digging. There were several spots of fresh blood on his shirt.
“Well you’ve been shot, in case you hadn’t noticed,” Orbey said.
“I noticed,” he replied.
She looked at Logan and said, “You, too.”
“I’ve been shot before,” he told her, as if it were nothing.
The truth was, neither his nor Ryker’s wounds were fatal. At that moment, they had digging to do. And as long as they weren’t bleeding out or losing control of their limbs, neither man would classify themselves as having anything other than minor wounds.
When they were almost two graves down, Boone and Clay showed up in one of the Chicom Jeeps with Rowdy and Felicity. Boone grabbed a shovel and began digging Otto’s grave. Clay asked if he could spell off either Ryker or Logan. Ryker glanced over at Logan, who was looking sideways at Ryker. Both men shook their heads, each unwilling to quit before the other.
Clay finally said to Boone, “Why don’t you give me the shovel, and you go and check on Stephani.”
“I want to dig,” he said.
“Give me the damn shovel, boy,” Clay growled. “Go see about Stephani.”
Boone finally nodded, handed him the shovel, then said, “Alright, I’ll be right back. Then maybe whatever dick measuring contest is going on between Logan and Ryker will be done and I can help.”
Clay’s chest jumped in a short laugh, then he turned and said, “Yeah, seriously guys. What gives?”
Both men denied any allegations, causing Clay to cock an eyebrow, shake his head in dismay and start digging.
A few minutes later, Logan looked up and saw Harper and Boone walking down the hill together. They were both carrying jugs of water and a few cups. Ryker stopped digging, his eyes on the water. Clay kept digging. Logan could see Ryker was in pain, the shine of red on his arm and on his side bright and wet. Ryker then glanced at Logan; Logan nodded his head, holding back either a grin or a frown.
“You first,” Ryker said.
“Just you saying that means you quit first,” he said.
“Whatever.”
Logan and Ryker spiked the shovels in the ground at the same time and crawled out of their graves, both of them having a tough time of it. When they were out, they stood slowly, brushed the dirt from their shirts and pants and rallied against the injuries they both suffered. It was getting harder and harder to do so because what they were putting their bodies through was not good, not smart and not easy to take.
To Boone, Ryker said, “How’s Stephani?”
“Healing,” he said, getting into Ryker’s grave and grabbing the shovel. “She’s got a broken nose, a cracked eye orbital, several bad gashes in her mouth and a cut open eyebrow.”
Harper dropped into the grave Logan was digging and pulled the shovel from the dirt. “Dr. Quinn stitched her up, but she’s going to look like Dr. Frankenstein’s monster for a little while, at least until she can heal.”
“Fortunately there are still some frozen cuts of meat from the freezer—” Harper said.
“The freezer survived?” Ryker interrupted, drinking a small cup of water.
“Yeah, most of the kitchen did,” Harper replied. “The swelling in her face is pretty bad. She can ice it with a moose fillet.”
“Is Skylar up there?” Ryker asked. He hadn’t said word one about her since they started digging. Logan found that odd, but then again, the man kept his cards close to the vest when it came to her.
“Yeah. She’s got two bullet wounds, one that grazed her thigh, another that took a pretty good bite out of her arm,” Harper said. “Plus lots of small cuts and bruising.”
“Is she going to be okay?” Logan asked.
“To look at her face or talk to her, you’d never know she’d just been through a war,” Harper said. “Then again, between you and Ryker—and you’re both just as bad as Skylar—I could say the same thing.”
“I’m sure the pain will kick in eventually,” Logan said. “Until then, we’ll do our best to ignore it. We have a lot to do between now and our deaths.”
“Cooper and I are going to check on the girls,” Orbey said.
“Thank you for the food,” both Logan and Ryker said.
She was walking up the hill when Dr. Quinn met her on the hillside. The two women talked for a moment, then Dr. Quinn hugged Orbey and continued down the hill with a medical case in hand.
When Dr. Quinn reached them, she looked between Logan and Ryker and said, “Alright, which of you two is worse off?”
Both hooked a thumb at the other, then realized what the other was doing. Then they both said, “Him,” at the same time, which caused a few snickers.
“They said there was some sort of ego trip going on here,” Dr. Quinn said, “but I didn’t believe it.”
“Now do you?” Harper asked.
She laughed and said, “Both of you take off your shirts.”
Logan was no longer the chubby computer geek he started the war as, but he wasn’t built the way Ryker was either. He looked over at Ryker; the man was now grinning, victorious.
“That jailbird physique of yours is impressive,” Logan said.
“Not bad for a computer nerd,” Ryker countered. “A little soft looking though. How much can you bench?”
“Depends,” he said.
“On?”
“How much does your mother weigh?” Logan asked.
“You two are something else,” Dr. Quinn chided, shaking her head. Logan was so busy chastising the man in his mind he didn’t see Harper looking at the bullet wound he’d been hiding from her.
“You could have told me,” Harper interrupted, her eyes on his chest.
Dr. Quinn was looking behind him, studying the exit wound. “You’ll need to come up to the barn to have this taken care of.”
“After we’re done here,” he replied.
“No,” the woman warned, her jovial mood gone. “You’re going to come now.”
Ryker laughed, but then Dr. Quinn turned to him and said, “His wounds are worse than yours. Which means he’s hiding more pain than you.”
Logan laughed as he put his shirt on, having got the better of the man.
“So it’s a draw,” Harper said, shoveling out a mound of dirt. “Try not to crowd out the world with your big heads.”
Logan tried to take the shovel from Harper, but she pulled the handle away and said, “Go get looked at. You and Ryker. The brothers and I can do this.”
Dr. Quinn said, “Let’s go, gentlemen.”
Ryker and Logan begrudgingly went to the barn with Dr. Quinn, had their wounds cleaned, then got the equivalent of field dressings applied.
“Do I even bother telling you two to relax for the next six weeks while your bullet holes heal?”
Both men said nothing, and then they shook their heads together.
“You two are something else,” Dr. Quinn said.
“Are we done?” Ryker asked.
“Yes,” Dr. Quinn said.
“Thank you so much,” Logan replied. He leaned down and kissed her on t
he cheek. “For everything, Dr. Quinn.”
“Yeah, thank you,” Ryker said. “We really do appreciate you.”
Boone, Clay and Harper all refused to give up their shovels to Ryker or Logan, so the two men sat there and watched, their minds finally starting to unwind.
Logan turned to Ryker and said, “You hurting?”
“You want the truth?” Ryker asked.
“Yeah.”
“I feel great,” he said.
Logan laughed and said, “I thought so.”
“I feel like I’ve been through a wood chipper,” Ryker finally admitted.
Logan ginned. “You need to learn to hide your pain better. Because I saw it all over your face.”
“I saw it in you, too,” Ryker said.
“No you didn’t,” Logan replied. “You’re projecting your pain onto me.”
Harper said, “Knock it off you two.”
“What?” they both asked at the same time.
Chapter Five
When they were done digging the graves, the men lowered Connor’s, Noah’s and Otto’s bodies into the holes. Logan asked Orbey and Boone if they’d like to say a few words.
Orbey nodded, drew a deep breath, then said, “I’d like to go first.”
Stephani and Skylar stood beside her, linking arms out of love and support, or perhaps to catch her if she broke down and couldn’t stand. She had that look like it could go either way.
“I used to say we’d spent too much time together,” Orbey said with a trembling smile. “Now I know it was not enough. I never really told you how good of a husband you were, but you were everything I needed whenever I needed it. Yes you annoyed me”—she said, wiping her eyes—“and I know I annoyed you, too, but we never quit. Because we loved each other. On both accounts, we never quit. God’s got his hands full deciding if He’s going to let you in or not, but He’ll have his hands full with me, too. Wherever we land in our eternal lives, I hope we land there together.”
She finished with what she wanted to say, and though her eyes were flooding over, she was able to stand without assistance. She patted Stephani’s arm, then smiled at Skylar and thanked her. Skylar let go, but stood beside her aunt.
Boone cleared his throat, smiled through his own set of damp eyes, and said, “Otto, old buddy, you did good. Your wife was an asshole for leaving you the way she did. And you deserved a more dignified ending than the one you got. But I’m glad you blew up so many of those commie pricks and I hope you kick the devil right in the balls when you see him.”
Logan looked at him and the man nodded. It wasn’t much of a eulogy, but it fit.
“I’d like to say a few words about Noah,” Logan said, “if that’s okay.” Everyone nodded, so Logan took a deep breath and began. “I don’t know what Noah survived in his life, or what he gave or took from those who knew him, or encountered him, but this man was a lion. Before this war, we only knew him as a grumpy old coot, but I’m pretty sure he’s going to hell after broom-sticking that SAA puke, and for a lot more things on top of that.”
Ryker snickered and Skylar cleared her throat.
Logan continued, unaffected.
“And I’m afraid when this is all over, most of us will join him wherever he is. My prayer is for him, for his soul. But it’s also for us, for what we may have to do to win this war. I pray to God we can learn from him. In his vigor to win wars, he became something we’re all becoming, and so as an aside to this, God, please find it in your soul to forgive Noah for his transgressions, and all of us when we commit ours.”
When he was done, Logan picked up a shovel and pitched the first scoop of soil into Noah’s grave. The others tossed soil on the bodies as well, each of them taking a moment of silence. It took no time at all to bury them, and Logan hoped that was not symbolic of the future. All these lives, all these people who left their mark in the former world, now just tucked in the earth, buried and forgotten but to the soil and to the worms.
Later, up at the barn, Harper asked Orbey if she wanted to rebuild. Logan had been wondering that since they first found Connor shot to death on the side of the interstate. Looking around, not answering right away, Orbey really thought about the question.
“This is not my home,” she finally said, her eyes seeing not just the injured and the destroyed all around her, but perhaps the memories of better times. “It’s mine and Connor’s home.”
“I know,” Harper said, taking her hand. “That’s why I asked.”
“Everywhere I look, I see him. But to know he’s gone now…I just don’t think my heart can take that right now.”
“You don’t need to make any decision right away,” Logan said.
“It’s okay. I know that. It’s just…I can hardly believe he’s gone. But knowing that, knowing I’ll never see him again, it makes me want to wrap things up here.”
She looked down at Cooper. He was lying at her feet, his emotions as troubled as hers. Then she turned to Felicity, who was holding Rowdy with tears streaming down her face. Orbey went to her, held her and the baby tight.
Logan could hardly take it. The hard outer shell over his heart was becoming porous with all this death, all this loss. Now Felicity. He’d heard about what happened to her parents, what she’d done in retaliation. Seeing her now, how fragile she looked, he didn’t think she could take all this. And he didn’t want that for her. Then again, he was once oblivious to the horrors of war, and somewhat grateful to have been hardened over time. Still, he couldn’t imagine what she was feeling. For a moment, he tried, but he felt himself quickly bending to the pain, which was merciless—so all encompassing, in fact, that he forced himself to shut back down and think only of the war. That’s what he was here for. Not this. Not doling out sympathy. To fall prey to such emotional trivialities now would be a death sentence. In the bottom of his heart, he knew this to be true, as callous and insensitive as it might make him feel.
In the distance, he heard an engine heading up the hillside entrance. Logan wasn’t worried about the SAA or the Chicoms, but he was curious about the visitor. When the Chicom Jeep arrived on the property, the driver must have seen the house and paused, the engine idling as he or she took in the destruction of Connor’s, Orbey’s and Stephani’s home.
Logan thought about going down to meet the driver, but then he heard the Jeep go back into gear, and start their way.
He walked outside by the garden, pistol in one hand, the other hand shading his eyes from the afternoon sun. Eyes on the hillside, he waited impatiently. When the mystery Jeep crested the hill, Logan saw Longwei in the driver’s seat. Holstering his gun, he waved at the man as he drove past the hives and parked in front of the garden.
Longwei shut off the Jeep, got out, and apologized for disturbing them. “Everyone is meeting in town for the ceremony,” he said, looking over the many faces. “The funeral pyre is nearly complete and the bodies are ready to ascend.”
“What do we do then?” Orbey asked, unmoved.
“What do you mean?” Logan asked.
“I mean, for us,” she said. “What’s after this?”
“I think we have to talk about it,” Longwei interjected. “But I can’t expect anyone to be ready for that with so much loss. We need to take the time to properly grieve.”
“We’re going to need to make plans sooner rather than later,” Logan said. He glanced Orbey’s way, felt her plow right through his defenses. Frowning, changing his tone and softening his bearing, he said, “But maybe not all of us. Perhaps we’ll involve the town once we have a more finite set of plans.”
“Now is fine,” Orbey said, waving him off. “We need a plan, and I need somewhere else to put my mind. Vengeance is a proper distraction.”
Chapter Six
Logan watched Boone open the door to the troop transport and help Stephani inside. He was happy to see her being taken care of. It was even nicer to see him taking care of her the way she’d taken care of him for all these months. This made him like Boon
e even more, which had been difficult because the man went to pieces—rightfully so—after Miranda was killed.
Orbey climbed into the cab next to her daughter and Clay offered to drive. No one seemed to object. Within minutes the group was loaded up and bounding down the hill. Every single injury Logan had seemed to rattle and ache, and the loud rotation of the wheels and tires was not pleasant on the ears or his state of mind.
He looked at the others and saw the same, stoic expressions on their faces. Skylar finally turned to Logan and said, “Do you still want to do this? Go to war with the SAA and the Chicoms? Because the SAA is going to hit the Chicoms first, and that could thin their numbers substantially.”
“If they can even find the Chicoms,” he said.
“With California in ashes, the SAA morale has to be depressing,” Skylar reasoned. “Maybe off-putting enough for the rest of them to avoid crossing the state altogether.”
“The convoy that got through didn’t seem that affected by it,” Logan said, glum. “Because when they were killing their way through town, it didn’t seem like any of them were breaking a sweat doing so.”
Longwei broke the silence, saying to Logan, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I have some good news from Quan.”
“Finally,” Harper mumbled.
“There is a network of spies inside the Chicoms, a network that has ties to other dissident networks in the nation.”
“I thought the EMP put a stop to that,” Harper said, perking up.
“It put a stop to your network because it was California based and the EMP destroyed that. But after the Chicoms set off the EMP, they brought in their new tech, which is better than before and unaffected by their earlier actions. This was planned, of course.”
“Of course,” Ryker said.
“The network of patriots and traitors are using sat phones and the newly transferred Chicom equipment to reestablish communications nationwide. It’s much easier now that an outpost has been set up in Washington State, specifically Yale.”
“How big is this comms network you’re talking about?” Skylar asked.