by A. L. Brooks
Huh, you know why.
Yes, she did. Justine was truly gorgeous, and her physical beauty had, for a moment, set off a physical response in Alex that was shocking. Not even Jade, that seductress extraordinaire, had managed to elicit such an intense…craving. Alex had quashed it as soon as she recognised it for what it was, but even so, Justine’s closeness was more than a little intoxicating. Hints of a musky perfume tantalised Alex’s olfactory system and caused disconcerting pulses of arousal to fizz across her body.
It was ridiculous—Justine wasn’t even flirting with her. Alex was the one imbuing the occasion with a deeper meaning. But holding someone’s attention that way was confidence boosting. It made her feel like she had something to offer, something that meant she wasn’t entirely unattractive, at least not intellectually. And yes, she had caught Justine looking at her a couple of times, but that didn’t mean anything. Or did it? Was Justine interested in her that way and Alex was too out of the game to realise it?
She blanched. Shit, maybe she was. Maybe she should just tell Justine she had a partner.
But then, what if Justine wasn’t thinking of Alex that way? How embarrassing would it be to make a big deal out of having a partner at home when Justine simply wanted to be friends? She blushed at the thought.
And actually, the last thing she wanted to do with these new acquaintances was talk about Terri. How could she bring the whole evening down talking about the quagmire she’d left behind in London? No one wanted to hear that, and definitely not two women she’d only met an hour ago.
She downed the last dregs of her second beer and noted the warm buzz the alcohol was giving her. Time to slow down. She definitely didn’t need to be getting drunk—she had a long day ahead of her tomorrow. And she knew from past experience that too much alcohol loosened her tongue in ways that could end up embarrassing her. That was the last thing she needed now.
“Another?” Sonia asked, gesturing to her empty glass.
Alex shook her head. “Just some water, please.”
“Are you okay?”
“Fine. I can’t drink much with jet lag. Seems to have twice the effect on me.” It wasn’t a total lie.
Sonia grinned. “I know, but sometimes that’s a good thing.” She winked. “Anyway, sorry I have been talking so much to Sylvie. I didn’t mean to ignore you.”
Alex smiled. “It’s fine. I’ve been chatting to Justine.”
Sonia’s mouth curled into a wry grin. “I noticed.”
Alex’s heart faltered in its rhythm. “W-what do you mean?” It came out more defensive than she wanted. Damn.
“Hey, nothing. I am only teasing.” Sonia frowned. “Are you sure you are okay?”
Alex closed her eyes for a moment. Stop overreacting. “I’m sorry, Sonia. I didn’t mean to sound so…” She left it unsaid. “It must be the jet lag. Scrambling my brains.”
Sonia smiled but didn’t look convinced. The noise level in the building increased as thumping music came from both below and above.
Raising her voice, Sonia said, “Great, the music’s started! Soon we can dance.”
Alex shook her head. “Not me. Haven’t danced in years. And I’m too tired.”
“Pah!” Sonia said, just as Justine leaned in to their conversation.
“I’m with Sonia,” she said, smiling warmly at Alex. “Dancing is exactly what you need.”
Alex laughed. “Maybe later.” She tried—and failed—to tamp down the arousal that flared again at Justine’s proximity. Why couldn’t she get a hold on this?
“Well,” Sylvie chimed in, “why don’t we have another drink first and then see how we feel?”
Alex sipped her water and chatted comfortably with all three women. Justine still gave no indications that this was anything other than a friendly evening, and Alex gradually relaxed, chiding herself for overthinking it earlier.
The bar was filling rapidly, and she noticed many women heading for a set of double doors at the far end.
Justine followed her glance. “They lead to the dance floors. Are you sure you don’t want to indulge just yet?”
“Not yet. But…maybe later.”
Sonia leaned over the table. “I am pretty sure I remember Danielle telling me you two used to dance all the time, yes?”
Alex’s cheeks burned from the flush that swept over them—memories of the wild times she and Danielle had shared always did that to her now. They’d been good times but also just a bit too crazy. They’d got themselves into some dodgy situations in those early days. Thank God they’d both grown up fairly quickly in the following years.
“That was a long time ago,” she muttered.
“Oh, is there a shady little past we need to hear about?” Sylvie teased.
“If Danielle is her friend, then yes.” Sonia’s eyes glinted.
Alex waved her hand in the space between them. “It was a long time ago,” she repeated, but her smile was wide as she glanced around at the three expectant faces in front of her. “Oh, all right, then.” The women smiled and leaned forwards further in their seats. Alex grinned, unused to being the centre of attention but loving how it made her feel. “Danielle and I met at university, in the LGBT group. We hit it off straight away, and, well, decided to assist each other in our quests to, um, meet women.”
Sonia’s eyebrows rose the quickest. “Meet?” she said, making air quotes.
Everyone laughed.
“Okay. Have sex,” Alex blurted out, her blush instantly reappearing. Her audience guffawed.
“And how successful were you in this endeavour?” Justine’s eyes had darkened a tad, and Alex lost her train of thought for a moment.
“Um, quite successful.”
Sonia giggled. “And you and my cousin, you never…?”
“Ew, no!” Alex shuddered. “I can’t think of her like that.”
Sonia’s laugh was loud. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry I mentioned it.”
Alex laughed too. “No, it’s okay. It is funny, though. Neither of us ever felt like that about each other, yet everyone at uni assumed we were a couple.”
“Did that cramp your style?” Justine asked. Alex glanced at her, then away again. There was something almost magnetic about Justine’s eyes—she couldn’t look at them for too long without a strange yet not unpleasant warmth spreading through her body.
“Sometimes. It also got us—” She stopped, suddenly aware of what she’d been about to reveal.
“What?” the other three asked in unison.
“Nothing. Doesn’t matter.” Her face was burning again.
“Oh no,” Sonia said firmly. “You’ve started now, so you must finish. What else did it get you, hm?”
Alex huffed out a breath. “Well, it, um, it got us…offers. You know. For threesomes.”
Sonia cackled and Sylvie shrieked. Justine, however, wore a slight frown as she murmured quietly, “And did you take up those offers?”
“No! God, no.” Alex grimaced. “Definitely not my thing.”
The relief that swept across Justine’s face seemed out of proportion to the situation. Had she been burned by something like that in the past? They stared at each other, and Alex’s breath hitched in her throat at the sudden intensity of the gaze.
“Well,” Sylvie said, unwittingly breaking the spell, “I think we should all hit the dance floor and let you relive some of those earlier times.”
Alex laughed. “I don’t need to relive them, thank you very much. They are best left forgotten.”
“Okay. Then how about creating some new times?”
She smiled, knowing there was no way she was going to get away without dancing tonight. “Okay, you win. Let’s dance.”
“Yes!” Sonia let loose a mini fist-pump that had Sylvie howling with laughter.
The four of them pushed back their chairs, grabbed their drinks, and headed for the double doors.
“The dancing is on two different levels in the building,” Sylvie said as they moved away from the table. “The basement is the recent music. It gets very hot and packed down there. And I’m too old to understand how to dance to that.” She smirked over her shoulder. “Upstairs is more my era. I prefer that one, if you don’t mind?”
Alex laughed. “No, I think old school is definitely where I’d fit in.”
“Me too,” Sonia chipped in, smiling.
“Justine?” Sylvie gave her a questioning look.
Justine shrugged and grinned. “I’m happy wherever we go.”
They climbed up two small flights of steps and pushed through a swing door into a decent-sized room that was mostly dance floor, with a handful of tables at one end. Alex instantly recognised the music and it put a bigger smile on her face than she would have anticipated.
They put their drinks down on one of the tables and sat down. Alex looked over at the dance floor. It was busier than she would have imagined for a Monday night. Many more women must have walked into the bar while she’d been distracted by her thoughts surrounding Justine and their interactions.
“I see what you mean about this being busy on a Monday,” she said to Sonia.
“I know, it’s crazy, huh? I don’t know how it happens, but I love it. It is such a great atmosphere to find so early in the week.”
“Perfect for someone like you who doesn’t keep regular hours, I guess?”
Sonia smiled. “That is true. Do not worry, I won’t keep you out too late. I know you are tired and have a busy day tomorrow.”
“I do. But now that we’re here, I think I could be tempted out there.” She gestured towards the dance floor, realising the absolute truth of her words as she spoke. The music was already making her toes tap under the table, and a hint of chair dancing was happening in her upper body. She felt a strange tingle on the back of her neck and turned to find Justine watching her, wearing an amused expression. Alex blushed but smiled.
“Well, come on, then.” Sonia grabbed her hand and pulled her up out of her chair in one smooth action.
“Okay, okay.” Alex laughed as Sonia tugged her none too gently towards the dance floor. Something told her Justine was following, and she had no idea where that sixth sense came from. Or what it meant.
Sylvie joined them a moment later and they eased themselves into a space on the floor. Alex tuned in to the rhythm and moved her feet, her hips swaying easily. She smiled, lost in the music and the moment. She didn’t know where her head was right now, and she didn’t care. It had been years since she had danced, had let herself truly go with the music without a care in the world. Terri didn’t like to dance; it was something they’d never indulged in together. Alex hadn’t realised until this moment just how much she’d missed it.
She threw her arms up and laughed as she moved her body, her hips, revelling in the euphoria of the moment.
A Whitney Houston track came on and virtually every woman on the floor let out a joyful shout. The atmosphere cranked up a notch and Alex’s face ached from the smile that wouldn’t leave her face. Sonia danced beside her, bumping her hip and laughing when Sylvie joined in from the other side.
And all the time there was Justine, moving smoothly and—oh God—so sexily in front of her. She could admit it, the woman was stunning to look at. If only Alex’s body didn’t pulse the way it did when Justine looked at her. Justine wasn’t even doing anything in particular to cause that reaction—this was all coming from within Alex and she had no idea what to do about it. Other than fight it and not do anything stupid.
A few tracks later, Alex needed a breather. She pushed her way through the throng of dancers back to their table via the bar for some more water, glugging gratefully at it once she’d collapsed in her chair. She was hot and aching a little in muscles she’d forgotten how to use, but it felt wonderful.
Sonia appeared a couple of minutes later with four beer bottles clutched in her hands.
“Dancing is thirsty work!” she said over the music. “And one more won’t hurt. Besides, I compromised for our old bodies and bought light.” She winked and Alex’s protestations died on her lips. Yeah, what the hell? Her first meeting tomorrow wasn’t until ten. So what if she didn’t go into the office until then? Somewhere inside she wondered just who she was right now. Carefree. Having fun. She really didn’t feel like herself. Or, at least, not the person she had been these past couple of years.
She threw back her head and chugged a couple of mouthfuls of the deliciously refreshing beer, which tasted better than she’d imagined a light beer could. She smiled her thanks at Sonia and took a couple more gulps before Sonia hauled her out of her chair again. Grinning, she bounced after Sonia back onto the dance floor. Justine smiled widely as she appeared and reached out a hand to grab her wrist.
“Where were you?” she asked, her mouth close to Alex’s ear so she could hear her above the music. The heat of her breath on her ear sent exquisite shivers down Alex’s body and she recoiled slightly. This was…wrong.
But, God, it felt so good.
She glanced at Justine and away again; her face, her lips, were just too close for comfort.
“Needed a drink,” she shouted, then subtly moved away, launching herself into the next track, fighting the dangerous attraction for Justine that was racing through her body and threatening to overpower her.
Over the next hour or so, she kept herself away from Justine, or at least tried to. She was enjoying dancing again and feeling so free. She knew she might regret it all in the morning and knew she definitely shouldn’t drink any more beer. She wrapped herself in the music again, closing her eyes and smiling as she moved. She and Danielle used to do this two or three times a week. Before Terri. Before Jade. Alex knew things changed as you got older, but somewhere along the way, she’d lost so much of herself. Things about herself she’d enjoyed and liked. More so in the last few months. What had happened with Terri had numbed her, made her lose touch with what really made her happy. Right here and now, on this dance floor, some parts of her that she’d forgotten were flooding back, and it was exhilarating.
On another trip back to the table to take a break, Sonia approached and bent her head to Alex’s ear. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine, thank you. Just tired.”
Sonia nodded. “I’m not surprised. Well, I don’t know how much longer you want to stay, but I need to leave soon anyway. We can share a cab?”
“Sounds good.”
Justine appeared, with Sylvie not far behind.
“Phew!” Sylvie plopped into a chair. “Now I remember why I don’t do this that often.”
Sonia laughed. “Me too! I am going to leave soon. Alex and I will share a cab. Do you guys want to stay or come with us?”
“I’ll come with you,” Sylvie said.
“I’ll leave at the same time,” Justine said. “I can walk home from here.” She caught Alex’s gaze, and Alex’s heart jumped a little at the look in Justine’s eyes. There was…something…there, something Alex couldn’t read. And she didn’t dare ask.
“Let me just go to the washroom,” Sylvie said.
“Good idea.” Sonia grabbed her hand and they wandered off.
Justine shuffled a little, her hands hitched in the pockets of her jeans. “Have you had a good time?”
Alex smiled. “Definitely. This… It’s been a long time since I danced.”
“You’re good at it. You should do it more often.”
A blush hit her cheeks again.
“Forgive me mentioning it, but you blush easily, don’t you?” Justine said, smiling.
Alex closed her eyes momentarily and laughed. “Yes,” she said. “Bloody Irish heritage
—I’m all pale skin and red hair as a result.”
“Your hair’s gorgeous,” Justine said, then it was her turn to blush. “Sorry, that—”
“Hey, no worries. That was a…lovely thing to say. Thank you.” Alex’s heartbeat sped up and she willed it to calm down.
They stared at each other for a few moments, and only Sylvie and Sonia returning from the washroom broke their gaze.
“Everyone ready?” Sylvie asked, glancing between them.
“Sure,” Justine said abruptly, moving away to grab her jacket from one of the chairs. Alex was grateful for the break in the moment they’d been sharing and busied herself with gathering up her own coat.
After winding their way down the stairs to the ground floor, they all wrapped up in their coats and stepped out into the cold night.
“This was such a good evening,” Sonia enthused as they stood in a small circle, their breath frosting on the air.
“Agreed!” Sylvie said. “Now I just had a thought.” She turned to Alex. “I know you may have plans with work this week, but I was going to drag this one out—” she pointed at Justine “—again tomorrow night, just for some food. Would you like to join us?”
Alex opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again. Justine had shot a quick glance at Sylvie, a quick glance that seemed to say “What the fuck?”, and Alex had no idea what that exchange meant. Perhaps declining would be best if Justine wasn’t that keen on spending more time with her.
“Oh, no, that’s fine,” Alex said. “I could probably do with a night in, to get some rest.”
“You would not be interrupting,” Sylvie said, lightly placing a hand on Alex’s arm, “if that is what you are thinking. We are just going to our favourite easy spot, Gabrielle’s. Nothing fancy, but you are more than welcome to join us. Isn’t she, Justine?”
Justine startled at the mention of her name. “Oh, yes. Sure, that would be really nice.” While her words were strong, her shoulders had a tense set to them that had Alex confused.