by Amanda Tru
What if she never got asked to audition in the first place?
Had that really been four years ago? She wished she could go back in time and tell that scared, wide-eyed country girl that everything was going to work itself out just fine.
No, Cosette wasn’t starring in any blockbuster films. Not yet. She didn’t have a profile on IMDB, still hadn’t qualified for membership in the Screen Actors Guild. Her two best friends were her hairstylist and a barista from her yoga class, not quite the high-profile celebrities whose parties she still dreamed of attending. But Cosette was happy.
Even more so now that she was about to meet Josh face to face.
It seemed so strange, after all these months of talking, texting, flirting. Even as she stared at the view of Alaska out her window, she had a hard time believing any of this was true.
Are you sure it’s safe flying all that way to spend time with someone you’ve never met? Even now, thousands of miles away, Mom’s voice echoed in her brain. Cosette knew it would be useless trying to explain her actions. Some people would never understand. Her parents got engaged when they were both seventeen and had known each other since they were in diapers. Cosette’s two grandpas had known each other as little boys. Her grandmas sang in the same church choir for decades. Of course, Mom wouldn’t understand the kind of relationship Cosette and Josh shared.
You don’t even know what he’s like, her mom had warned. It’s like flying out to meet a total stranger. Remember when Jesus told his disciples to be wise as snakes and innocent as doves? I hate to tell you this, sweetie, but right now, you’re not acting like either.
Cosette clutched her phone while the plane taxied to the gate. She stared impatiently at her blank screen, waiting for Josh’s text. Her parents were just paranoid. It wasn’t Mom’s fault. It was a generational thing. Cosette’s mother couldn’t even figure out how to pull up an online recipe from the family’s ancient desktop. The world of texting, emails, and video chats was foreign and therefore mistrusted.
Cosette didn’t blame her mother. But Cosette was an adult now, which meant she didn’t have to listen to her.
She jumped slightly when her phone beeped. Josh. Could it really be that he was only a few hundred feet away? That in a couple more minutes, she’d see him face to face?
Why did the pilot take so long to pull the stupid plane up to the terminal?
Just checking to make sure you made your flight safely.
Not Josh. Just her dad.
Cosette thumbed back a hurried reply, her heart racing even more quickly with each second the plane taxied on the tarmac, bringing her closer to happiness. To love.
To Josh.
“Rough landing?” asked the passenger sitting next to her.
Cosette couldn’t process his words.
“Your hands are shaking,” he commented.
Cosette gave a little shrug but didn’t answer. How much longer until she could get off this plane?
Her phone buzzed again, startling her so much she nearly dropped it.
Stay safe, her dad texted.
I will, Cosette promised. Her hands were so sweaty she could barely type the letters in.
Your mom and I are praying for you.
The pilot made his final announcement. The door opened, and Cosette felt dizzy with anticipation as the passengers began their torturously slow file off the plane.
She sent Josh one more text: I’m here, and she grabbed her bag and got ready to meet the love of her life.
It didn’t make sense. Where was he?
She’d texted Josh a dozen times after landing but hadn’t heard from him since they talked when she was in the Seattle airport during her layover. He should be here by now. He’d promised to meet her just outside baggage claim. Even made a joke about holding a six-foot sign to embarrass her, calling her his long-lost princess.
Where was he?
The small town where Josh lived was a four- or five-hour drive from Anchorage, longer if the roads were icy or covered in snow. Last summer, when they first met, he’d texted her a picture of the highway drop-off, a massive cliff hundreds of feet high. What if he’d hit an ice patch and careened down the mountainside? What if he’d run into a moose? What if he’d simply changed his mind about their relationship and didn’t have the heart to tell her?
What if, what if, what if?
It was only five in the afternoon, but the sky was so black, and Cosette was so tired from her travels, it may as well have been midnight. Almost everybody from her flight had left baggage claim by now. One brown suitcase sat on the still carousel, abandoned. Other than a redhead who was talking on the phone by the doors, Cosette was alone.
Was there a problem with her cell signal? Maybe Josh hadn’t gotten her messages. Cosette’s stomach dropped to the floor of her abdomen when she realized that perhaps he thought she’d been the one to change her mind. But that didn’t make sense. She’d called him from the Seattle airport. He knew she would be here now, right?
“I’ll call you when the road opens.”
Cosette couldn’t help overhearing the other passenger’s conversation. Why did people have to talk so loudly when they were on their cell phones? Did they think everyone around them wanted to listen in to what they were saying?
The redhead ended her call, letting out a loud huff as she shoved her cell back into her pocket. “I hate this weather.”
For a minute, Cosette assumed the woman was talking to someone else until she remembered they were the only two passengers left in baggage claim.
“Yeah. Looks pretty snowy out there,” she answered noncommittally.
The stranger rolled her eyes. “Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.”
Cosette didn’t exactly feel like being drawn into someone else’s misfortune, but then again, she didn’t know anybody in this entire state besides Josh. And he was missing.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
The woman tossed her long red hair over her shoulder with an expression hinting that even such a small gesture cost more energy than it was worth.
“It’s the stupid snowstorm,” she answered. “Got the entire Glenn closed down.”
Cosette didn’t know if the Glenn was a bus line or a department store or a chain of fast-food restaurants. It could have been a summer cruise line for all she knew. Her unfamiliarity with this airport, with extreme winters, with the state of Alaska as a whole, did nothing but remind her of everything her mother warned her about.
This boy lives in the most remote part of Alaska, where you don’t know anyone and won’t have anybody to help you if something goes wrong.
You don’t even know him.
How do you know he’s who he says he is? How do you know he’s not some kind of murderer?
God will always be there to protect you, but if you put yourself deliberately in danger like this, what can you expect him to do?
Cosette blinked, trying to force her mom’s voice out of her head. When she opened her eyes, the red-haired passenger was still staring at her. “You look familiar. My name’s Missy. Have we met?”
Cosette wished she could say yes. She wished for anything akin to a familiar face in this desolate terminal. She’d never been in an airport without hundreds or thousands of busy commuters scurrying by. The quiet was as unnerving as the blackness outside.
“This is my first time in Alaska,” she answered.
Missy crossed her arms and made a deliberate show of sizing her up. “Lemme guess. West coast?”
Cosette was confused. “What?”
“You’re from the west coast? California?”
“Pasadena,” Cosette answered.
Missy gave another sigh. “Figured. What’re you doing here?”
“I was supposed to meet someone…” Cosette let her voice trail off and tried to think of a way to excuse herself. There had to be a reason why Josh wasn’t here yet. Maybe his phone was having problems connecting, and she wasn’t getting his texts. He would be worried
. She needed a quiet place to think, that was all.
A place to be alone.
“Do you happen to have a name?”
Cosette flushed again and realized she’d been lost in her own thoughts. “Cosette,” she answered, staring past Missy’s shoulder to see if, by some miracle, Josh might materialize by the exit doors.
There was still nobody else nearby.
“It’s nice to meet you, Cosette.”
“You too,” she answered distractedly.
“So, who’re you waiting for?” Missy asked.
“My boyfriend’s supposed to be here.” Cosette surprised herself with how naturally the title rolled off her tongue. She’d never called Josh her boyfriend before. Could you call someone that if you still hadn’t met him face to face?
Missy let out a scoff. “That’s men for you, right? Can’t ever rely on them for anything.”
Cosette didn’t offer a response.
“Does this boyfriend of yours live in Anchorage?” Missy asked after a brief silence.
“No, he’s from Glennallen. He’s a trooper out there.”
“Trooper, huh?” Missy raised her eyebrows. “Well, I’ve got some bad news for you, sister. That snowstorm’s taken out all the power lines past Eureka. Cell service is down in the entire Copper Valley, from what I’ve heard.”
Cosette wasn’t familiar with any of those names, but that didn’t stop her stomach from clenching. “Are you sure? How do you know?” It couldn’t be. She’d talked with Josh back in Seattle. He mentioned a little snow but hadn’t said anything about the power going out.
He was supposed to be here…
“My ride’s stuck too,” Missy answered. “We’re in the same boat, you and me. Best guess is it’ll be at least another day before they get the Glenn cleared.” She gave a shrug. “That’s Alaska for you. You don’t like the weather, you’re welcome to find somewhere else.”
Cosette ignored Missy’s words and tried to calculate how many hours ago Josh said he was leaving. “If he left Glennallen around noon, how long do you think until he gets here to Anchorage?”
Missy furrowed her brow, her arms still crossed.
“With the snowstorm,” Cosette explained. “How much extra time will that take?”
Missy gave a little chuckle. “We’ve got one highway going into Glennallen. Only one. And it’s shut. There’s no other way in or out.”
Cosette thought she should understand Missy’s words more clearly than she did. “One highway?” she repeated in an attempt to buy herself a few extra seconds to let her brain process this information.
Missy sighed. “Hate to be the one to have to tell you this, but if your boyfriend didn’t get out before the road closed down, there’s no way he’ll be here to pick you up tonight.”
Cosette’s palms were sweaty on the handle of her suitcase. Her mom’s warnings and dire predictions ran through her mind like a playlist on loop.
How do you know you’ll be safe?
He lives in the most remote part of Alaska.
You won’t have anybody to help you if something goes wrong.
God will always be there to protect you, but if you put yourself deliberately in danger like this, what can you expect him to do?
Cosette glanced up at Missy. “What do you think we should do?” Her voice sounded far less confident than she would have liked.
Missy gave her one last shrug. “I know a place. It’s not pretty, but you’ll be warm. Come on. I’ll take you there.”
“So, let me get this straight.” Missy glanced over at Cosette, the straw from her pop stuck somewhere between her teeth and bright red lips. “This boyfriend of yours… This trooper dude. You’re telling me that you flew all the way out here, but you still haven’t met him in person?”
Again, Cosette heard her mother’s incredulity and paranoia echoed in Missy’s question.
“Well, we video chat every day…” Cosette couldn’t quite read Missy’s expression. With all of Cosette’s savings and the bulk of her grocery budget going toward her plane ticket out here, she couldn’t exactly say no when Missy offered to split a hotel for the night. The diner Missy took her to was dimly lit and greasy, but Cosette was too worried about how to make up the time she was missing with Josh to worry about the lousy food or how she’d manage to scrounge up enough cash to foot her side of the bill.
“That’s either really, really stupid, or it’s super romantic.” Missy gave her a smile and noisily slurped at her pop. “I wonder if I’ll have better luck if I sign myself up for some kind of dating service. Hard to find The One when you live in a town of three hundred.”
“Not many single guys where you’re from?”
Missy flipped her hair over her shoulder. “Oh, we have plenty of single guys. They come up to do commercial fishing in the summers or work on the oil slopes.”
Cosette guessed there was a catch to Missy’s words and waited for whatever it was that she was going to say next.
Missy took another loud slurp from her straw then remarked, “We’ve got a saying out in my neck of the woods. With that many single men, the odds are good, but the goods are sure odd.”
Missy signaled for the waitress and asked for another Coke. Then she raised her eyebrows and smiled at Cosette. “Whoever this Josh guy is in Glennallen, you might have found the only eligible guy in a hundred-mile radius. Lucky you.” She leaned forward in her seat. “What’s the name of the service you’re using? I may have to check it out myself.”
“I used one called Betwixt,” Cosette answered. It was hard to believe that over half a year had passed since Josh’s profile had first popped up on her screen as a potential match. By that point, she’d been on so many bad first dates in Los Angeles she was ready to take her profile off the site for good. The day she reached out to Josh was the exact day she’d gotten her very first callback after four years of failed auditions. The producer asked her to come back in two weeks to read lines for a TV miniseries about Alaska’s most notorious serial killer. That same day, she found herself staring at the profile of an Alaska state trooper. Could it possibly be a sign? At the very least, she figured talking to someone more familiar with the culture and history of the area might help her chances of nailing her callback and finally winning her breakout role.
As it turned out, she got turned down for the TV show but received a blessing far more life-changing in return.
Missy had been uncharacteristically quiet ever since Cosette told her the name of the dating service that had paired her and Josh so many months earlier. Cosette wondered if Missy’s mouth only ran while she still had soda pop to slurp, like a wind-up toy that runs out of steam before it simply stops moving.
“Betwixt,” Missy repeated. “That sounds really familiar.”
Cosette watched as Missy’s eyes widened and knew exactly what was coming next.
“Wait a minute, isn’t that the one that had that big murder thing? Oh, man. I figured they would have shut it down after what happened.”
Cosette didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t had this exact same conversation a dozen times with her mom.
No, Mom, just because one man created a fake profile to lure away some woman he was stalking doesn’t mean I’m going to get myself killed.
Online dating is way safer than going home with someone you meet at a bar. That’s way more dangerous. Josh and I talk hours a day. We know each other. Besides, if he had ulterior motives, he wouldn’t have wasted all this time. If he were looking for an easy target, he wouldn’t spend months talking to someone who lives thousands of miles away.
Missy pulled out her phone and set it on the table between them. “Okay, you’ve gotta show me this guy. I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging or anything, but I actually get a sixth sense about people. I’m not saying it’s a hundred percent foolproof, but I can check out his profile and tell you if I get any red flags or anything.”
She leaned forward and gave a conspiratorial smile.
“Besides, I’m guessing if he could convince you to leave sunny California and fly up here in the middle of a winter snowstorm, this trooper of yours has gotta be super hot. Man, I love a man in uniform. Come on. Let me take a look.” She slid her phone even closer to Cosette’s plate. “I’m an awesome judge of character. Why else do you think I’d risk asking a total stranger to share a hotel room with me? I’m telling you, I have a sense about these things. Now let me look, and I’ll tell you if anything jumps out.”
Cosette was tired, and it was still hard not to worry about Josh’s safety. What if he’d gotten into an accident on the highway and the emergency vehicles couldn’t get through the snow to rescue him? And if Josh didn’t have any way to get in touch with her, how would they make plans to get together?
With Cosette’s work schedule and tight budget, she only had a short amount of time to spend here in Alaska. It wasn’t as if she could just sit around with Missy waiting for spring to come and melt away all the ice and snow.
Then again, since she was stranded in a strange city in the middle of a snowstorm, she couldn’t complain about having made a new friend.
She pulled out her cell phone. “Here, I’ll look him up on mine,” she told Missy. “I’m already logged in.”
It had been several months since Cosette and Josh had moved their relationship away from Betwixt’s somewhat clunky messaging system in favor of texts, video chats, and phone calls, but she still kept his profile saved on her phone so she could look at his pictures. Whenever she felt lonely, when he was working a late shift at the trooper’s station, she could pull up his profile and gaze at his image, wondering how in the world she got to be so lucky to have piqued the attention of someone like him.
No, not lucky, as her mom would remind her.
Blessed.
Cosette found her favorite, the picture of Josh in his trooper’s hat, posing for a photo with snow-capped mountains in the background.
“Here he is.” She held out her phone.
Missy smiled as she took it, but her expression changed almost immediately as she stared at the screen.