by Moni Boyce
In his periphery, she peered up at him. He kept looking straight ahead while he thought about her question. Turning it over and over in his mind.
It gutted him when he first realized finishing his term at Architecture school was now a thing of his past, and not meant to be his future. The first few years, he was back in Dublin, it had been hard and difficult for him to resign himself to this life, but he had. He’d walked around bitter, lashing out at those around him, as if they were personally responsible for his plight. When he eventually gained a measure of peace about it all, it had been better for everyone.
As if she was in his head, reading his thoughts, Jordan began to recite a poem from memory that mirrored how he felt about his own wasted future.
“What happens to a dream deferred? Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun?”
The haunting lines of poetry wrapped around him, like a noose tied around his neck. “Who… who wrote that?” He choked out the words, interrupting her.
“It’s called “Harlem.” Langston Hughes wrote it.”
When she finished reciting the rest of the poem, he felt like Mr. Hughes had caught a glimmer of his life and wrote the words with him in mind. He bit the inside of his cheek and masked just how much the poem had affected him, before he responded to Jordan’s earlier question with the first and only lie, he ever planned to tell her. “Naw, I don’t miss it.”
So his conscience wouldn’t prick him too much over the lie he’d told, he began to talk about the next building they were going to see.
If she didn’t believe him, she didn’t call him out on the fib he’d let so easily fall from his lips.
Soon enough he was able to put that behind them and enjoy the rest of the day he’d planned. In front of The Custom House, Jordan asked someone to take a picture of them. Conor was about to protest, but he reminded himself that they only had a month. Jordan should have some photos to remember their time together, besides the memories he planned to ingrain in her every time they made love.
Before they took Samuel Beckett Bridge back across the river, they stopped and purchased a spice bag to share on their walk. Jordan instantly fell in love with the Asian-inspired dish that was a mixture of chips, spices, chili peppers, onions and pieces of fried chicken. When they finished, he kissed the salt from her lips.
After a nice walk, they reached Trinity College. There was so much on the campus to show her. The first stop was at the Old Library. In Conor’s opinion, no visit to Dublin was complete without visiting this work of art. The main chamber of the library, the Long Room, was an architectural gem. The magnificence of the dark wood, the archway ceiling that stretched the length of the room, and the symmetry of the openings to each book stack on the lower and upper galleries was a feast for the eyes. Busts of famous writers and philosophers lined the room, giving it even more of an air of Old World charm and dignity.
This room and the viewing of the first two volumes of the Book of Kells, which contained the first four Gospels of the New Testament along with other texts and tables, captivated Jordan. She stood transfixed by the still vibrant colors of one of the oldest books in existence.
Before leaving the campus, they visited the bell tower, known as The Campanile. Jordan removed her mobile from her pocket and took pictures.
“Will you take a picture of me for the gram?” She held her mobile out to him with a grin. “Then I want to get a selfie of the two of us.”
Once he took some pictures of her. She looked through them and approved his camera angles and choices. When it came time for the selfie, he held the camera and snapped the shots since his arms were longer.
From there it was a short walk, to stately Leinster House, once the palace for the Dukes of Leinster.
“Minus the cars, this building makes me feel like I’m in a Jane Austen movie.”
Conor raised his brows in question.
“You know all the period films that feature her books usually show the characters walking near a building identical to this, discussing some gossip or scandal.” She gazed up at the building wearing an adorable, dreamy look, clearly reliving some scene from said films.
By the time they finished goofing off at the parliament building, Conor was famished again.
“You’re about to have the best chipper you’ve had in your life.” Conor boasted on the walk to Leo Burdock’s. Dublin offered many fish ‘n’ chips, but to him, they served the best.
Jordan allowed him to place their order. The mouth-watering food was handed over in brown paper bags that slowly became decorated with grease stains. They were walking the short distance to St. Stephen’s Green Park when Jordan’s stomach rumbled.
Conor chuckled. “I’m not the only one that’s hungry.”
She looked down embarrassed but couldn’t fight the giggle. “Guess not.”
The sun was starting to set as they found an unoccupied bench and sat to enjoy their food. When he unwrapped his meal, he leaned in to let the aroma of the fried fish waft up his nose.
“Mmmm. This looks delicious.” Jordan salivated over the food.
“You have to try it with curry.” He handed her one of the sauces he’d shoved into the bag before they left the eatery.
“I will dunk my fries in the curry sauce, but I want vinegar on my fish.” Jordan snagged a container of vinegar from the bag.
Conor threw his head back and laughed. “You’re not in America anymore. It’s chips… We’re going to make an Irish girl out of you yet.” He popped a chip into his mouth and winked at her.
He watched her eat a piece of the cod. After the bite she closed her eyes and sighed. “That’s really good.”
“Told ya.”
While he shoveled more chips into his mouth, something occurred to him. He swallowed. “Have you ever seen a rugby match?”
Still chewing, she shook her head no.
“Soon the clubs will open up. While you’re here, you’ll get the opportunity to see a match… if you want.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s not the IRFU, just me, Cash, my friend Eoin and some other lads that play around the city. We’ll have our first match while you’re here. I think you’d enjoy it.” It was hard to keep the hopeful look out of his eyes. He’d love to have her watch him play.
Her eyes glowed with eager enthusiasm. “That would be fun. I’d get to see you all sweaty and aggressive, playing sports?” She cocked her eyebrow at him in a suggestive manner.
“Sounds like good foreplay.” She winked at him.
The food lay in his lap forgotten while he conjured her naked and writhing beneath him. All the sexual innuendo she’d just alluded to had him fecking horny. Jordan was completely oblivious to the state she had him in.
While Jordan ate, she surveyed the park. “This park is beautiful and relaxing. I could spend the day here.”
She was right. It was nice. He’d enjoyed their day together immensely. The thought of being able to be here with her or anywhere with her a year from now crossed his mind in that moment and he pushed it away. It would only make him bitter that the time they had together was so short.
A glob of curry sauce fell off the chip in her hand and landed on her fingers. She searched around for a napkin.
Conor’s hard-on hadn’t disappeared. He reached over and took her hand.
Jordan’s gaze followed his movements and stayed riveted on his actions, as he slowly put her two fingers in his mouth up to the knuckle and sucked. The sensuous action made her swallow and her lips parted like she wanted to say something.
When he pulled her fingers from his mouth and gave her back her hand, they were both locked on each other.
He was now imagining licking other parts of her anatomy. “I want to take you to bed.”
“How far away is the hotel?” Her eyes glittered with lust.
“Not far.” Conor was already up and stuffing his uneaten food into the bag.
She joined him. “We can always finish our food later.”
Conor took h
er meal and put it in the bag before grabbing her hand and walking them in the direction of her hotel.
By the time they reached her room, they were so hot for each other. The hotel room door had barely shut, and they were kissing and undressing on the way to the bedroom.
After a couple blissful hours between the sheets, she fell asleep after the third orgasm he’d given her. Conor managed to set an alarm on his mobile, so he’d only sleep for an hour.
When the bell chimes went off, alerting him his nap was over he got up and got dressed. Jordan slept on her stomach. He tried to rouse her to say goodbye, but she was softly snoring. The sound made him grin. Tucking the information away for later, that when Jordan was thoroughly satisfied and tired, she snored. It would make for great material to tease her about later.
He kissed her disheveled curls and used the pen and paper on the nightstand to write her a note. Tonight, he needed to close the pub, and spend the night at home. Guilt nibbled at the back of his mind, for not spending more time with his Da. Plus, he needed to do the washing. The clothing piled up was manky and could no longer be ignored. Cash certainly wasn’t going to do it.
With one last glance, he left the bedroom and let himself out. A sinking feeling settled in his gut during the elevator ride to the lobby. This was going to be hard when they inevitably had to say goodbye.
11
Jordan
Two weeks of Jordan’s vacation had come and gone. She’d spent nearly every waking moment with Conor, and many nights, he stayed over in her hotel room. She hadn’t been to his house yet or met his father, but she knew it would be soon.
Part of her was starting to get antsy. She hadn’t yet broached the subject or the possibility of him returning with her to America when it was time for her to go home.
Most of her morning had been spent talking with Les and getting an update on how things fared in her absence. Now she chewed her thumbnail debating whether to call Elodie. One of the people she knew would give it to her straight.
Before Jordan could talk herself out of calling her, she dialed her sister’s number. Pensive and nervous, her fingers frayed the edge of the hotel magazine that lay in her lap. Listening to the ringing, she secretly hoped the call would go to voicemail.
Her sister answered on the fourth ring. “Hey. What’s up?”
Damn. “Hi. I thought you’d be at work. I was going to leave a message.”
“Well, you got me. Tell me how it’s going?” Elodie bit into something and chewed in Jordan’s ear.
“Uhm…”
Her sister began talking over her, before she could actually respond. “You’re gettin’ that good D aren’t you?”
Jordan guffawed at her sister’s bluntness.
“I know you are. That’s why no one has heard from you. I just hope you’re making him wrap it up. Don’t come back here pregnant with a little Irish baby. And remember you do need to see some of Ireland while you’re there. You’re on vacation. I’m expecting pictures. That means you need to get outside the four walls of the hotel room.”
Jordan’s ears and face grew warm with embarrassment from her sister talking about her sex life. She changed the subject. “Haven’t you looked at my pics on Instagram? I posted pictures of the city.”
“That was over a week ago, Jordan. By the way, Irish dude is hot. Does he have a brother?” More smacking sounds came from Elodie.
“Can you stop chomping in my ear?”
“You called during my breakfast, so no, you’ll have to listen to me eat.” She punctuated her sentence with a loud crunch from whatever she was eating.
“I asked you if Conor had a brother and you haven’t said anything yet.”
“Yes, a younger brother, that while good looking, he’s immature. I’m not sure he has his shit together yet, and I know you’re all about a guy having his shit together.” Jordan knew her sister.
“Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t break him off a piece if he looks anything like his brother.”
They both laughed.
After a few seconds, her sister abruptly stopped laughing. “Now what did you really call me for?”
Jordan hated that her sister knew her so well.
“Elle… we’re having the best time. I haven’t been this happy in a long time…” She curled her legs beneath her and placed the magazine on the coffee table.
“My time is halfway done here, and I haven’t asked him about coming back to New York with me.”
The sound of Elodie sliding something across a surface echoed through the phone. “You know this is where I tell you to put your big girl pants on. You need to have the talk with him. I mean, isn’t that why you went all this way? You want something lasting. You guys can’t make it work if you’re in two totally different places… I guess you could, but what kind of life is that?”
Jordan held the phone, unable to respond to what her sister said.
Elodie’s tone grew serious. “But… you also need to prepare your heart if the answer is no.”
Even though she knew there was a possibility of things not going the way she wanted, Jordan was too stubborn to believe it would go any other way than how she’d fantasized in her head. Things had been so amazing so far. How could anything go wrong?
“I gotta go.” Getting up from the sofa, she searched for her shoes.
Her sister sighed. “Okay girl… I just hope you remember what I said.”
Elodie sounded resigned. Jordan knew her sister knew her well enough to know that she wouldn’t heed her advice, not about this. Her heart was already too invested. Logic, caution, reason and using her head had gone out the window the minute she learned Conor felt the same way she did.
After hanging up with her sister, she walked down to the pub. Inside, she found Cash wiping down the bar and Fergus, Desmond and Niall seated on their usual barstools.
“Hey fellas.” She waved at the Three Wise Men.
They raised their pints to her.
“Afternoon, Jordan.” Niall gave her a smile that was all teeth and gums. His cheeks glowed a rosy red, telling her he’d imbibed quite a bit.
“Hey Cash.” She leaned on the bar.
Across from her, he leaned onto the bar. “My poor heart knows that you’re not here to see me, love.”
His brother always shamelessly flirted with her. Jordan found him harmless and charming. She reached over and tousled his hair. “Yes, I’m looking for your brother.”
He leaned his head away from her hand, and she snickered.
With a nod, he gestured towards the storeroom. “He’s doing inventory. Go on back.”
Before she disappeared inside the storeroom, Cash called out to her. “If you and my brother decide to use the storeroom to handle business, make sure he shoots me a text, so I don’t disturb you.”
Jordan froze in place. She didn’t bother to turn around and address him but could feel a flush creeping across her cheeks. Cash was probably grinning like the wicked little imp he was. She didn’t have any brothers of her own, but he had certainly been giving her a taste of what it was like to have one, as they got to know one another.
Some patrons that were sitting at the bar made catcall noises.
She cleared her throat and pushed the door to the storeroom open and stepped inside. The area was bigger than expected with rows of shelves that held kegs, casks and boxes of various beers and liquor. Off to the immediate left was a small office where there was just room enough for a desk, chair and a few filing cabinets.
“Conor?”
“Back here.” He shouted.
Jordan walked in the direction of his voice. Further back the room grew a bit chilled and the few rows of stored alcohol gave way to rows of kegs hooked up to long tubing that fed the beer into the taps at the bar. It was all hooked up to some sophisticated system that displayed meters above each keg.
She rounded one of the rows at the back of the room and found him. He looked sexy in jeans and a t-shirt.
“Aww, you’re a
sight for sore eyes, bean álainn.” Conor came over and kissed her before resuming what he was doing.
Small talk escaped her. All she could think about was the future she wanted with him and how to broach the subject. He was preoccupied with dealing with his inventory and hadn’t realized her discomfort.
“Are you ready for your first rugby match tomorrow?” He asked her while eyeing one of the meters over a keg of Guinness and scribbling something on a clipboard.
“Uh… yeah.” It was times like these when she was nervous that she found her hands grew restless and she started to fidget with things. Like she was now. Her hand had found its way around a piece of the tubing. She quickly removed it and placed it behind her back.
Conor stopped his inspection and looked up at her. “You okay?”
“Yeah.”
When he went back to what he was doing Jordan chewed her bottom lip and cursed herself for being a coward. Just say it. Her fingers knotted themselves together.
“No.”
Conor looked up from the meter again, slightly exasperated. “No, what?”
Without any more hesitation, she blurted out what was on her mind. “I was wondering if you would consider coming back to New York with me when my vacation here is done.”
There I said it.
She took a deep breath and waited to hear what he would say.
“Do you mean like on a holiday?” Conor tapped the pencil against the clipboard and waited for her answer.
“No… I meant… you living there…” Her sister’s words echoed in the back of her head: ‘But… you also need to prepare your heart if the answer is no.’
Irritation gleamed in his eyes and the pencil was now held tightly in his fist, looking like it could snap in two at any moment. “Why do we need to discuss this right now?”
“Why not now?” Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion.
“I can’t just up and move, Jordan. What would I do for money? I only know how to serve pints.” The last sentence was said with animosity.