She shook her head. “Just nerves.”
I didn’t believe her, but I couldn’t think of any way to get her to open up to me. There was something going on with her, something overwhelming, but she didn’t know how to tell me about it.
She didn’t trust me.
That’s all right, I reassured myself. By the time we are mated, she will trust me with everything.
I leaned down to kiss her, and she responded as if it were the last time we would ever be together. Her mouth pressed against mine, and she wrapped her arms around my neck tightly, clinging to me as her tongue probed my mouth—the first time she had ever taken the lead in any of our kisses.
Through her shirt, her nipples pebbled into hard buds, like points of pure desire pressing against the skin bared by my chavan and the vandenoi strap that crossed my chest.
My need for her surged through me, bringing my cock to life. Our bodies yearned toward one another, living conduits of the mating bond craving completion. I moaned deep in my throat and tightened my arms around her waist, lifting her up off her toes.
Eventually, I pulled my lips from hers just enough to whisper against them. “Amelia and Zont didn’t wait, you know. There are no other grooms vying for your hand. We could follow their example.”
I knew it was too much, too soon, but I couldn’t help asking, hoping maybe she would realize I would never hurt her.
Hoping she would know we belonged together as instinctively as I did.
With a whimper, she pressed herself against me, deepening the kiss until we were both breathing heavily.
Finally, she drew away a little and shook her head. “Not yet,” she whispered. “I couldn’t stand it if…” Her voice trailed off.
If anything went wrong, I finished her sentence in my mind. “I understand.”
Slowly, I set her on her feet again, sliding the front of her body down mine so she felt the evidence of my desire straining toward her. Her eyes fluttered into the back of her head and her breath caught in her chest. Exhaling one long, slow, shaky breath, she reached up to place one hand on either side of my face. I tilted my forehead down until it rested against hers.
“You really are an amazing man.” Her voice trembled, and I knew if I pushed, even just a little, she would invite me in.
I couldn’t do it.
“I’ll see you in the morning.” Gently, I dropped a light kiss on her forehead, forced myself to release my arms from around her body, and stepped back as she opened the door.
“Tomorrow,” she whispered, and as she stepped into her room, she glanced back at me, her eyes brimming with tears.
I really needed to find out why she was so frightened of the connection between us.
Tomorrow, I promised myself.
Halfway back to my quarters, I realized I left my wristcom in the chair I occupied during the party that Mia had called a “reception”—which, come to think of it, was an odd term, since no one was receiving anything there.
I should never have taken off the wristcom in the first place. But I had been awake and working for most of the previous two days, and the strap had begun to chafe against my skin in an odd way.
Even now, the skin there was slightly discolored and inflamed, possibly a reaction to accidental exposure to some of the Hordedust, as my team and I had taken to calling the disintegrated bodies from the Alveron Hordeship.
I didn’t want to put the wristcom back on yet. And I was too tired to be bothered with anything other than falling into bed right now. Even my kiss before leaving Mia at her door had been perfunctory.
Not that I couldn’t have been convinced to work up more energy if she had asked me to stay. But as usual, her response had been mixed—part eager passion, part utter terror.
I’ll com Cav when I get back to my quarters. He can get the wristcom to me tomorrow.
And as for Mia—our own Bride Games were scheduled to begin in the morning. I would get a full night’s sleep and give her my complete attention then.
The Alveron Horde had once again been repelled. I had all the military scientists onboard the station working on Hordedust. I could afford to take some time out to properly court my bride.
When I got back to my quarters, though, it took me a long time to fall asleep.
More than anything, I wanted to have Mia in the bed next to me. I was ready to claim her, make her mine.
Even the thought of claiming her made my cock twitch and grow hard. I ached to hold her, taste her, make her scream in pleasure. I wanted to plant myself inside her.
I fell asleep imagining holding her in my arms, and I dreamt of her.
In that dream, she held a small child. I knew he was ours, somehow—but at the same time, part of me also knew he wasn’t exactly mine.
His head rested on her shoulder, his legs wrapped around her waist. His skin was a lighter shade of human brown than Mia’s, his close-cropped, dark, curly hair the same shade as hers.
As I stepped forward to take them both in my arms, she receded from me in the way of dreams, until I stood alone in the center of Station 21, desperate to find them again.
Chapter Nineteen
Mia
I had been here for less than ten days, but it felt like forever since I had talked to Josiah.
At least I had figured out where things were, mostly, so I knew where I was going—and when to go. Station 21 ran on a twenty-four-hour schedule, but there was still a kind of a night shift. The Khanavai had figured out long ago that they needed a dark cycle, just like humans did. At any given time, half the lights on the station were lowered, including the living quarters. A smaller part of the station ran on the opposite schedule, so what most of us considered the night shift workers were acclimated to their own “daytime”. I just hoped the transporter room would be on the night shift at the same time I was.
I made my way quickly through the public areas of the station, trying to look like I knew where I going, look like I belonged there, among the humans with legitimate business on the station.
When I arrived at the transporter room, I waved Eldron’s wristcom at the entry pad and tapped in the code I’d heard him speak into it.
Luckily, the transporter room had been powered down at some point. I didn’t know if it was because of the night schedule or because no one was using it at the moment, but I really didn’t care as long as I had the room to myself.
Now I simply had to figure out how to work the damned transporters. The terminals were lined up at the back of the room like giant versions of vacuum tubes at bank drive-throughs—only these were big enough for humans and Khanavai, or in some cases, even crates of goods to be delivered to the space station.
For the first time ever, I wondered why the rejected brides were loaded onto a shuttle transport to go back to Earth, when we were all brought here by transporter.
At least I should be able to figure out how to work a transporter more easily than I could learn to fly a shuttle.
Each tube had a control panel on the side, and as I made my way over to the closest one, I heaved a sigh of relief. Khanavai and human technology had merged over the last several years in more ways than I think either race had ever expected.
Granted, the Khanavai didn’t allow us to use their transporter technology freely, so it wasn’t exactly the same. I studied the panel for a moment.
Power buttons, numbers, detailed controls…
Yeah, it was familiar—much like the control panels that ran most of the electronics on Earth. Not that I had anything as nice as a unit control panel in my crappy old apartment.
But every kitchen I had ever cooked in—even the diner grill—had one.
I can use this. I can go home to Josiah.
But then what would I do? Start running again? Where could we go? Frank knew where I was, knew that I had been living under is an assumed name. He could be heading to get Josiah from Becca right now, for all I knew.
He could have had Josiah for days by now.
A
nd if he didn’t have Josiah already? He would track us down again. He would never stop chasing us.
There was no place on Earth that was safe.
I had only one choice.
Decisively, I entered Eldron’s code again and pushed the button to turn on the transporter. It flickered to life, bright white lights running up and down the sides as it powered up.
On the touchscreen, a request for input blinked. Nine digits. It wanted the code for a tracker. Without giving myself time to think, I tapped in Josiah’s code—not the one he had been assigned at birth, but the one attached to the new tracker I had implanted to replace Josiah’s legal one when we had run from Frank.
I pushed enter and stood back to wait.
I might not be able to protect my child on Earth, but I could make sure he was safe as possible, at least for now, by bringing him up to Station 21 with me. I had no idea how I was going to explain this when we got caught—because I knew we would. But Eldron had said he loved me.
He said we were mates, fated to be together for life.
Maybe he means it.
He probably wouldn’t want me after this, not after he found out all the ways I lied to him and to the world.
But he was a good man. I was sure of it. He would make sure Josiah and I were protected.
Sobs clogged my throat as the outline of Josiah’s body formed in the transporter. It was all I could do to keep from clawing my way in through the tube door before he was completely solid.
I watched impatiently as the curve of his cheek grew more real by the second, the roundness of his tiny body solidifying before my eyes. As soon as the machine slid open, I lunged in and grabbed Josiah, tears streaming down my face. “Josiah! I am so glad to see you. I love you, I missed you,” I babbled, squeezing my tiny five-year-old baby boy to myself as I rained kisses on his face.
He had been sleeping when I transported him, still wearing his favorite Spiderman footie-pajamas, his eyes half-closed with sleep. “Mama,” he said. “Are you back?” He glanced around, confused. “Where are we?”
“No, baby, I brought you up to Station 21 with me. You’re in space. Isn’t that exciting?”
“In space?” He looked around at the walls. “Are you sure?”
“I am.” I had to give him another squeeze, just to make sure he really was there with me.
“Where’s Becca?”
“I couldn’t bring her with you. But we will be sure to tell her where you are, so she doesn’t worry.”
And that was enough for him. He wrapped his arms around my neck trustingly, and I picked him up, unwilling to stop touching him for even a moment.
I didn’t know how I would get word back to Becca—she would be frantic when she found him missing.
But it was more important to keep Josiah safe.
Thank God Frank hadn’t found them yet.
Now, though? I wasn’t even sure what to do next. But I knew I needed to get out of this room. The last thing I wanted was to be caught illegally transporting someone aboard Station 21.
“I want to go back to bed,” Josiah grumbled.
With one hand, I reached up and stroked his dark, tightly curled hair. “I’ll see what I can do about that. You just rest your head on my shoulder, and I’ll carry you.”
The warm, trusting weight of him calmed a deep inner part of me that had been screaming in terror ever since I’d been transported aboard the station.
Safe. My baby is safe.
The words kept echoing in my head as I carried him out into the hallway.
I didn’t know how long we could stay hidden on the station, but at least right now, there was no way Frank could get to him.
I started to head back to my room. When I reached the juncture that would lead either to the brides’ quarters or to the grooms’ quarters, I paused, thinking of all the ways Eldron had helped others since I’d been here.
He’d arranged for Tiziani to be stationed here for the next year. He’d made sure Cav and Natalie could be stationed together when it came time for Cav to go to what Natalie called “Spy School.” He had done more than anyone else knew to deal with the Alveron Horde attack.
Surely he can help Josiah and me, too.
The thought of going to him terrified me. What if he couldn’t see his way to aid us?
Still, it was the best chance we had of getting away from Frank. Eldron might not be willing to marry me once he knew about Josiah, but he wouldn’t simply abandon us, either.
Inhaling deeply, I turned toward the grooms’ quarters.
It was time to tell Eldron everything.
Chapter Twenty
Eldron
A quiet knock at my door startled me awake, used as I was to years of battle-readiness drills. When I opened the door, Mia stood there with a small child wrapped around her, clinging to her with his arms and legs, his head resting softly on her shoulder, eyes closed.
She looked so much like I had dreamed her that it took my breath away.
“We need your help,” she said simply. I pulled the door wide to let her pass inside without a word, even though I was brimming with questions. Who was this child? Why did they need me? What could they need my help with in the middle of the night when our Bride Games started the next morning?
I waited until the door closed behind her, not entirely certain that this wasn’t still a dream. I tilted my head toward the boy. “He’s yours?”
She nodded. “From my first husband.”
My head spun at her words. Married women—even those who had been divorced or widowed—were not placed in the Bride Lottery. “I don’t understand.”
She moved to the bed, where she placed the boy gently on the mattress, then pulled up the rumpled clothes to cover him. When he whimpered, she sat down beside him and stroked his head gently.
I waited patiently as she settled him, then dragged over the room’s single chair until it was across from her and sat.
Speaking softly so as not to wake him, Mia began speaking.
“We married when I was pretty young—almost 10 years ago. His name is Frank Holden. He’s a police officer in New Jersey.”
At my frown, she explained, “That’s a state in the United States.”
“So he’s an enforcer for Earth laws?”
Her laugh held an undercurrent of bitterness. “He’s supposed to be.”
I gestured for her to continue.
“He didn’t hit me at first.” She glanced down at the floor, as if she would find the words there she needed. “But he yelled, said horrible things to me. I thought having the baby would soften him, somehow.” Her eyes, when she met my gaze again, were full of dark pain. “I was wrong.”
Part of me wanted to hurry her along, get her to explain how she had ended up in the Bride Lottery. But I could tell the story was hard for her, so I forced myself to be still, to keep my hands clasped lightly between my knees as I leaned toward her, when all I wanted to do was gather her up and hold her in my lap, protect her from even the story of her pain.
I clamped down on all those desires, giving her space to tell it at her own pace.
“So you left him?” I finally prompted when she didn’t continue.
“Eventually. First I tried to go to the police.” That bitter laugh escaped her again. “I had to go to Frank’s precinct. It was in his jurisdiction, you see. And that meant telling his colleagues what he had done.”
Dark anger swirled in my chest. “They didn’t believe you?” I guessed.
“No. When I started telling my story the two of the officers, one of them turned to the other and said, ‘Remember that time your wife filed bullshit claims on you?’”
I clenched my teeth together, forcing myself to remain perfectly still. I wanted to get up and pace the room, demand more details. But that would only frighten Mia—and her child.
“What happened next?”
“Frank beat the hell out of me for trying to report him. And I convinced myself that I was okay, as long a
s Frank was good to Josiah.” She nodded at the boy now sleeping peacefully in my bed.
“I take it that didn’t last?”
“No. The day he came home and tried to kick Josiah for making too much noise—that was the day I reached my limit.”
A fierce protective instinct pushed me to my feet with an inarticulate noise of rage. Mia flinched, and I managed to stop myself from stomping to the door and heading straight to Earth to find this monster who had hurt my mate and our child.
Her child, I reminded myself. But the mating bond didn’t agree. He belonged to Mia. Therefore, he was mine to protect, too.
“How did you get away?” I asked, forcing myself to sit back down.
“I ran,” she said simply. “I filed for divorce—got all the paperwork ready and everything. But he refused to sign and demanded custody of Josiah. Without any proof that he was abusive—no police reports or anything, of course—there was nothing I could do to keep him from coming after us.”
This time, she was the one who stood and began pacing. “So we ran again. I changed our names, arranged for new tracker-translation chips.”
“Mia Jones is not your real name?”
“It is now.” She shrugged. “I’ve gotten used to it.”
“And that’s how you ended up in Bride Lottery.”
“The chip was supposed to be clean—it’s entered in all the systems, but it was supposed to look like I’d already been through the Lottery. I guess I should not have trusted that man, either.”
I stood, reaching out to take her hands in mine but stopping short of actually touching her. “There are males who are trustworthy.”
She glanced up at my eyes, and with a sad smile, placed her hands in mine. “I think I’ve figured that out. It’s why we’re here. I trust you.”
“Where has Josiah been while you have been up here?”
“With a friend—she’ll be frantic when she finds out he’s gone. But I couldn’t leave him down there for a minute longer.”
“How did you get him up to the station?” I paused, my mind racing. “Oh. My wristcom.”
Claimed for the Alien Bride Lottery Page 8