Friends Without Benefits

by Dena Blake

  “Jesus. If my head wasn’t screwed on…What would I do without you?” Glo’s voice rang through the house when she joined them in the living room and picked up her book. Within fifteen minutes she was asleep in her chair.

  Everyone else was focused on the football game when Emma grazed her hand across Dex’s thigh to pull her attention from the TV. “Take me home?” They’d been there way past the obligatory hour after dinner.

  Dex nodded. “Whenever you’re ready.”

  Emma stared into her eyes, trying to convey how she wanted this night to end. “I’ve been ready since you got here.”

  Dex’s lips curved up to one side as she got up, took Emma’s hand, and led her out the door.

  * * *

  Dex had been awake for close to an hour watching Emma sleep. They’d made love again last night. When she’d woken this morning with Emma in her arms, she’d immediately wanted to do it again, but she’d looked so peaceful, almost smiling in her sleep. Was she dreaming about the same things she had—of a life filled with love instead of heartache? She didn’t know how, but Emma was slowly pushing Grace out of her heart. Not replacing her so much as making a whole new place that seemed to encapsulate all of her. It wasn’t a feeling she could ever explain to anyone. She just knew Emma was special and destined to be in her life.

  When Emma opened her eyes and caught Dex staring, she blushed and became more beautiful, if that was possible.

  “How long?” She rubbed her eyes.

  “Have I been awake?”

  “Have you been watching me?”

  “Maybe an hour.” She smiled. “You’re easy to watch.”

  Emma rolled her eyes before she reached up, hooked her hand behind Dex’s neck, and tugged her in for a scorching kiss.

  “You should’ve woken me. A whole hour has gone to waste while we could’ve been doing something else.”

  Dex chuckled. “Like breakfast?”

  “That too.” Emma made tiny circles with her finger across Dex’s collarbone and seemed to go somewhere else for a moment. “Thanks for offering to help my dad with the yard and the lights. He’s not as young as he used to be, and I worry about him taking on all that by himself. My brothers are busy with their own lives. They’ll show up between games and put in an hour, but that won’t be enough.”

  “It’s my pleasure. I love the house, and your dad takes great care of the lawn.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. The grass looks like it’s been fertilized well, and I could do a lot with the landscaping.” Dex had noticed the overgrown holly bushes and unshaped crepe myrtles. She’d also seen a couple of nice-sized flower beds in the front, flanking the steps to the porch, that needed to be cleaned out.

  She stared across the room to nowhere in particular. “So, this whole girlfriend thing.” They hadn’t really gotten to discuss it earlier. It had just happened in front of everyone. “I may not be very good at it. I mean I haven’t been in the past.” She returned her gaze to Emma. “But I’d like to give it a go if you do.”

  Emma pulled her brows together and rolled her lips in. Dex’s heart raced. Maybe she’d made a mistake putting it out there since Emma seemed to be reluctant to introduce her that way to her parents. Then Emma reached up and caressed Dex’s cheek with the back of her fingers.

  Emma took in a deep breath as she hooked her hand behind Dex’s neck and brought her closer. “I do,” she whispered across her lips and then kissed her.

  Chapter Twenty

  Grace came in hot as she pushed her way through Dex’s front door. “I can’t believe you just abandoned me like that.”

  “I didn’t abandon you. I was only a phone call away.”

  “That’s a bunch of shit.” She dropped her purse on the end table. “You let that woman answer your phone all night.”

  “She insisted.” Dex closed the door and followed her into the living room. “She helped you better than I would’ve. She’s a great cook.”

  “You don’t have control of your own phone now?”

  “Of course I do.”

  “So, why did you let her? She was condescending and bossy.”

  Dex frowned. “Really? I heard the calls, Grace. I thought she was kind of sweet, considering you were interrupting dinner. You got through it, didn’t you?”

  “Next time you’re coming to my house.” She flopped down onto the couch. “You’re going to come over and help me decorate the tree tonight, right?”

  “Isn’t Brent going to help you?”

  “He’s going out with his buddies and won’t be home until late.” Brent was becoming absolutely useless around the house. It seemed he was getting comfortable now that they were married.

  “I can come over for a little while, but I actually have plans later this evening.”

  “Dex, this is ridiculous. Do I have to do everything alone because you’re going out with her?”

  “Her?” She stared at Grace. “You mean Emma. My girlfriend?”

  “Great.” Grace rolled her eyes and made no attempt to hide her irritation. “Now she’s your girlfriend?” She should’ve never listened to Brent’s stupid idea to fix them up.

  “Wasn’t that the plan? Why you set me up with her in the first place?”

  She took in a deep breath. “I’m sorry. It just seems like you don’t have any time for me.”

  “That’s not true. I’m here with you now, aren’t I?”

  “For an hour or two.” She wrapped her arms around her neck. “I miss you.”

  She put her hands on Grace’s waist and kept a small distance between them. “Okay. I’ll help you for a little while this afternoon.”

  Grace’s mood perked up immediately. “Yeah! We can have hot chocolate and listen to Christmas music. It’ll be such fun.” She squealed with excitement.

  “Okay, then. Let me get some warm clothes for later, and I’ll follow you to your place.” Dex ran up the stairs to the bedroom.

  “Where are you two going tonight?” Grace shouted.

  “Ice-skating,” Dex said as she sprinted down the stairs to the living room.

  The tiny hairs on the back of Grace’s neck stood up. “At Millennium Park?” Another something they always did together.

  “Yeah. Can you believe Emma’s never been before?”

  “But we always do that.”

  “What’s the deal, Grace? Why isn’t Brent taking you?”

  “I told you he’s going out with his buddies.” She frowned.

  “Emma hasn’t skated in years, and she might need some help getting the hang of it again. So it wouldn’t be much fun for you. I’m sure Brent will take you another night. Just ask him.” She took her jacket from the closet. “Come on, let’s go. I only have a few hours.”

  Grace picked up her bag from the end table and went to her car. She didn’t like being second in line for anyone, including Dex.

  * * *

  Emma had been quiet the whole walk to the rink. Dex had tried to explain why she’d been late when Emma had picked her up, but having to wait in the car for a half hour until she got home had made the situation even worse. It seemed as though Grace had gotten between them again. She had no idea how she was going to resolve this conflict between Emma and her best friend.

  “Hey! Fancy meeting you here.”

  Dex closed her eyes when she heard the voice. Fuck. Grace had followed them here even though she hadn’t invited her.

  She turned around, tilted her head, and stared. “Fancy that.” She let the words roll from her lips slowly. Grace glanced away quickly. She knew Dex was pissed.

  Emma peered around her. “Is Brent here?”

  “No. He’s not an ice-skater.”

  “You came alone?” The surprise in Emma’s voice was clear.

  “Sure. I do it all the time.”

  Emma turned to Dex. “And she just happened to be here on the same night as us?”

  Dex let Grace move ahead of them as they walked into the rink area and fell back
to talk to Emma. “I’m sorry. I told her we were coming, but I didn’t invite her. I didn’t think she’d just show up.”

  “Really?” Emma shook her head. “Even I know she’d show up. When has Grace ever needed an invitation?”

  “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine. I just didn’t expect to have to share you with Grace all evening.”

  “I’m really sorry. I swear I didn’t invite her. She’s probably here because we’ve always done this holiday stuff together, and Brent’s not into it.”

  Grace slowed up. “It’s tradition,” she said, apparently catching part of their conversation.

  “We need skates,” Dex said, and started toward the skate rental.

  “I’ll get them.” Grace took some money from her pocket and rushed to the counter.

  “This is the second time she’s horned in on one of our dates,” Emma said as she found a place for them to sit and change into their skates.

  “I’m sorry.” She shrugged. “I don’t know what else to say.”

  “Tell her to go home.”

  “That would be rude.”

  “And you don’t think she’s being rude right now?” She glanced over to see Grace walking toward them with a pair of skates dangling from each hand. “Do you see three pairs of skates there?”

  “She just doesn’t know your size.”

  “She didn’t even ask.” Emma shook her head. “She sure didn’t have to ask for yours, did she?”

  Grace held up the skates. “All set.”

  “Did you leave Emma’s at the counter?”

  “Oh, sorry. I forgot.” She smiled at Emma. “You can get your own, can’t you?”

  “Seriously?” Emma slipped her boots back on. “I’m gonna go.”

  “So it will just be the two of us?” Grace asked, seeming ridiculously happy now.

  “No, it will not.” Dex took Emma by the hand and moved her away from Grace. “Please don’t go.”

  Emma closed her eyes and took in a breath. “This isn’t going to work tonight. Just go have fun with Grace.”

  “I don’t want to skate without you.” Dex’s voice rose.

  “Then you should tell her to go home.” Emma didn’t sound angry now. She seemed more disappointed.

  “Come on, Em. It’s just a few hours.” Dex knew she sounded needy, but she really wanted her to stay.

  “You have no idea, do you?”

  “Come on, Dex,” Grace shouted from the ice, and Dex turned momentarily.

  Emma pulled out of her grasp.

  “What? Wait.” She reached for her again.

  “Stop.” Emma put her hands up in front of her. “You need to think about who you want to continue your Christmas traditions with. This cozy threesome isn’t working for me.” She searched her pocket for her keys. “Let me know when you’ve figured that out. I’m sure you can get a ride home with Grace.” She took off quickly through the crowd.

  Dex stood there watching Emma leave and wondering how her night had gone to shit without her even doing anything wrong. When they’d run into Grace in the ice-rink parking lot, all talking had stopped, and the only conversation Dex had been able to get from Emma was one-word answers. Dex had been totally stunned. She couldn’t believe Grace would blatantly horn in on her date with Emma. On second thought, it was typical of Grace to get what she wanted, even if it made Emma and Dex uncomfortable. Dex just didn’t think it would be such a huge deal.

  She spun around to Grace, who was now at the edge of the rink watching with rapt attention. “Why the hell did you do that?”

  “Do what?”

  “You know exactly what I’m talking about. You showed up here uninvited, and then you didn’t get Emma any skates.”

  “I didn’t know her size.”

  “That’s bullshit and you know it. You should’ve asked.”

  “It not like she was having a good time. Did you see the scowl on her face? She was going to ruin it for us.”

  “We’re not twelve anymore, Grace. You can’t do that to people. Especially people who are important to me.”

  Grace gave her a strange look. “You just started dating a month ago. How can she be more important to you than me?” She clomped off the ice. “Who was it that hung out in jail with you after that protest because your parents weren’t there to bail you out…or planned and threw your college-graduation party…or kept you sane when Ranny had that car accident?” Her voice trailed off. She sank onto the bench.

  Dex took in a deep breath, knowing the last one had been hard for Grace as well. “You’ve always been there.” Grace might be rich and spoiled, but she had always been there for Dex. Even in the most difficult times.

  “You’re damn right I have. I’ll always be here to take care of you, Dex. You’ll never be as close to her as you are to me.”

  “I don’t have to choose, do I, Grace?” Grace didn’t respond. “I really like her. Aren’t you closer to Brent now than you are to me?”

  Grace shook her head. “No. You don’t have to choose.” She closed her eyes momentarily. “But honestly? I think I’m closer to you than anyone, including Brent. I mean I’m intimate with Brent, but that’s different from our friendship.” She sat on the bench. “He’s not very emotional, doesn’t always care what I want to do. He would never come here with me. He’d rather hang out with his buddies.”

  Dex sat next to her. “Did you know that before you got married?”

  “Pretty much, but I’m working on him.”

  Dex blew out a breath. “That’s a big fucking problem to be working on.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll be fine.” Grace bolted up. “Worry about your own problem.”

  “What’s that?”

  Grace handed Dex her skates and then slipped out onto the ice. “If your girlfriend can’t take a little shit from me, she’s certainly not going to hang around for the hard stuff.”

  “You need to be nicer to her, Grace.”

  “Okay. Got it. I promise to be nicer,” she shouted as she turned around and skated backward away from her. “Now, hurry up.” Whether she would or not was yet to be seen.

  Dex had done something she knew she shouldn’t have. She’d let Emma leave and hadn’t followed her. But Emma was really pissed, and she wanted to let her calm down before talking to her. So, instead of leaving and following her home, Dex put on the skates and went out onto the ice. If Emma couldn’t get past her friendship with Grace, it wasn’t going to get any easier.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Dex sat across from Juni at her kitchen table telling her what a mess the night had turned into. She and Grace had skated for over an hour before she’d gotten off the ice and changed into her boots. It hadn’t been fun this year. She’d fallen a number of times because all she could think about was Emma. When they were done skating, Grace had bought them each a cup of hot chocolate and sat down next to her to watch the better skaters, like they usually did. The hot chocolate even tasted bad, and she loved the hot chocolate at the rink. She’d made the wrong decision letting Emma leave without her. Not that she’d really had a choice. And when they’d arrived at Grace’s house, she’d flashed her a sweet smile and asked Dex to come in for another cup of hot chocolate, and she’d done it. Another stupid decision.

  “What did I do wrong?”

  “You let Grace hijack your date again, and you didn’t do anything to stop it.”

  “The first time wasn’t really my fault. We were going to the market, and Grace and I always did that together. I felt bad, so I invited her and Brent to come along. Brent was kind of doing his own thing, and Grace was kind of lost, so she pretty much clung to us the whole time.”

  “You really think that’s how it all played out?” Juni raised an eyebrow. “I’ve never seen Grace lost in my life. She knew exactly what she was doing. You’ve grown up together, and she has no respect for you, at least not the kind you deserve.”

  Dex closed her eyes and shook her head. “I hate to thin
k that, but she did kind of enjoy pissing off Emma.”

  “There you go. And yesterday, she just showed up and guilted you into staying and skating.”

  She got up and paced the room. “Why is she doing it?”

  “Oh, Dex.” Juni shook her head. “It’s obvious to anyone who’s ever known you how in love you are with her.”

  “That’s changed since I met Emma.” But had it really? Dex wasn’t sure. She still had lingering feelings deep in her heart, and she sure as hell wasn’t going to tell her sister that.

  “Then stop letting Grace control you.” The irritation in Juni’s voice surprised Dex. “Last night was certainly intentional on her part, and you stayed with Grace instead of leaving with Emma. Your girlfriend. Damn it, Dex. Don’t you see the problem here?”

  She flopped into the couch. “What should I do?”

  “Stop being so fucking nice to Grace.” Juni’s voice softened. “You have to make the break, or she’s going to continue to ruin whatever chance you have at anything with Emma. You’re on the ledge, Dex. You just need to let go. Take the leap into the unknown. Have faith that life will be good with Emma.” Juni rubbed her back. “You’ve been playing it safe, waiting for someone you know you can’t have.”

  “You want me to let go of the only woman I’ve ever loved. Let go of my dreams.”

  “They’re not her dreams, honey. You need to make new ones with someone else. And I think we both know that someone is Emma.”

  Even though Juni was right, Dex was petrified to move on. Grace might be rich and spoiled, but she’d always been there when Dex needed her.

  Juni went into the kitchen and came back with the coffee decanter. “Grace will never stop unless you make it clear to her you’re in love with someone else now.” She filled their cups and went back into the kitchen. “You should’ve gone after Emma last night.”

  At this point Dex was so confused, she didn’t know what to do. She really liked Emma, but Grace had been in her life for a long time. She wasn’t ready to cut her completely out of it. Dex had never thought she’d have two women jealous over her time. All she knew for sure was that she had to get to work. The Christmas lights weren’t going to hang themselves, and she was paying her crew time and a half to work the holiday weekend.