by Skye Tisdale
Maybe I was losing my mind. That was the only way I could explain the fact that I was going out into a blizzard in the middle of the night, risking my life for a woman I’d only just met. One thing was clear, though: one way or another, she was going to get me killed. It was just a matter of time…
***
CHAPTER 7
MORGAN
Axel’s cabin looked much cozier in daylight. The basic wooden furniture, thick woolen blankets and crackling fireplace reminded me of my grandmother’s old farmhouse, where my sister and I used to spend every summer up until the year she disappeared. Despite not having been back for nearly a decade, I still dreamt of that life. I dreamt of living at the heart of nature, just like my grandmother had. I dreamt of growing zucchini and strawberries in the garden, sipping hot tea in my bathrobe while watching yearling deer frolic around in my own backyard, and suntanning naked just because I could…
But David wanted the city life, and David’s word was law.
More often than not, I felt like we were on opposite sides of a long rope, playing tug of war with each other’s wants and needs. And because he was so much stronger than me, I was always the one to let go first. I was always the one to lose. That’s how I ended up living the city life, even though it was the opposite of the life I truly wanted. I despised the noise, the smell of cigarettes wafting in through the living room window, and the fact that the only thing we had to call a “yard” was the thin strip of grass growing between our front porch and the city sidewalk.
David had taken so much from me: my dreams, my happiness, and even my sanity. The only thing I had left to give was my freedom. David may be determined to take that from me too, but I was just as determined to keep it. This time, I wasn’t going to lose.
The kettle whistling on the stove interrupted my thoughts. I got up and poured myself a cup. Inside, I placed a bag from the herbal tea package I’d found in the cupboard earlier. I also found a half–eaten box of crackers, which I took for myself. I did feel a bit strange, rifling through Axel’s cupboards when he wasn’t around, but he did tell me to make myself at home—and at home I always had a cup of tea in the morning.
Phoebe weaved in and out between my legs as I walked back to the kitchen table, trying not to spill my overfilled cup of tea. As soon as I sat down, she jumped onto the table and meowed loudly at me. I set my cup down and ran my fingers through her long, thick fur.
“Hey girl.” I smiled. “You hungry? Sorry, I don’t think cats are supposed to eat crackers.”
Phoebe stared at me while I ate my breakfast with a side of guilt. As soon as I was done, I got up and started searching through the cupboards for cat food. I found none. I furrowed my brows and looked down at Phoebe, who was pacing anxiously back and forth on the kitchen floor. Maybe it’s in the garage, I thought.
At some point during the night, Axel must’ve placed my boots by the fire, because that’s where I found them. They felt dry and warm against my bare feet. Since I didn’t have a jacket of my own, I pulled one of Axel’s fleece shirts over my head before opening the door. I struggled to hold it open against the strong winds howling in my ears. Phoebe shot past me and made a bee–line for the garage. I followed her and saw a light coming from the small window, but my breath fogged it up when I tried to look inside. I tried the door handle and found it unlocked.
Inside, I found Axel. I was surprised to see him there. My car was there too, with the hood popped open, and Axel was leaning inside of it with his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I closed the door and stepped inside reluctantly.
“Good morning,” I said, wondering why he hadn’t let me know he was back.
Axel glanced up at me briefly. “Morning, princess.”
“Have you been back for long?”
He shrugged. “Just for a little while.”
I took a few steps closer and watched him fiddle with the greasy parts and pieces beneath the hood. I had no idea what any of them were, but it was still interesting to see. Maybe I could even learn a thing or two. “What are you doing?” I asked and leaned in curiously.
“Fixing your car,” he murmured.
“Well… what’s wrong with it?”
He sighed. “Transmission’s no good.”
“Of course, the transmission. That fickle little thing.” I nodded as if I knew what he was talking about. “So… Do you know how to fix it?”
Axel wiped the grease from his fingers and shot me an annoyed look. “Do you always ask so many questions?”
I swallowed hard and felt my cheeks redden. “Only when the person I’m talking to doesn’t know how to keep a conversation going!” I hissed at him. “You know, maybe if you actually left your cabin once in a while, you’d actually learn how to talk to people.”
As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted saying them. Axel didn’t even respond. He just scoffed and turned back to the car, shaking his head. That only made me feel worse.
“Sorry,” I murmured. “I didn’t mean that.”
“You did—but that’s all right, princess. Maybe I am no good at talking to people. Suppose that’s just what happens when you spend too much time on your own. Turns you into a hermit…”
I looked at him for a long moment while he continued to work on the transmission—whatever that was. I didn’t know what to say. Somehow, he managed to make me feel both irritated and intrigued at the same time. “Why do you keep calling me that?” I asked finally.
“Call you what?” Axel looked up at me with a hint of a grin on his face. “Princess?“
I gave him a sour look. “Yes, that.”
“Because you are a princess,” he said. “Just look at you. Your clothes are all nice and tidy, you got your make–up on, hair tied up…”
I rolled my eyes. I was wearing Axel’s clothes, which were all wrinkly from being slept in, and my hair was tied up in a loose bun with strands sticking out in every direction. If I looked like I was heading anywhere, it was to Walmart 5 minutes before closing, not a royal castle.
“I’m starting to think you’ve never even seen a princess,” I said. “I’m not even wearing any make–up, because my parents don’t allow it. So, you can stop calling me princess now, because it doesn’t make any sense!”
Axel chuckled heartily. “Whatever you say… princess.”
I pursed my lips. He was just teasing me now, I knew that. It was incredibly annoying, but at the same time, it made me feel all warm and tingly inside. That made absolutely no sense at all. There was nothing appealing about how incredibly irritating Axel was. Now, if only I could get my body to understand that, too…
“I got you something,” Axel said suddenly. He wiped his fingers on his pants and walked around to the passenger side of the car. He pulled out a big, black garbage bag from the back seat and handed it to me with a smile on his face.
“Trash? It must be my lucky day…” I said dryly and took the bag from him. It was heavier than it looked.
Axel chuckled and shook his head. “Not quite. Look inside.”
I untied the knot and peeked inside curiously. I saw a pair of sturdy winter boots, a fur–lined women’s jacket that looked expensive, thick snow pants, and several pairs of gloves and hats. The shoes were obviously worn, but the jacket and pants looked like they’d come straight from the factory.
I looked up at Axel hesitantly. “I don’t understand. Where did you get all this?”
“From the lost & found bin at the bar. You wouldn’t believe the stuff people leave behind. You know that saying: one man’s trash…”
“…another man’s treasure,” I finished and bit my lip. “But what if they come back?”
“Doubt it. That coat’s been in the back room for two years. If someone really missed it, don’t you think they would’ve come back for it by now?”
“I guess.”
Axel returned to the hood of the car. “Don’t worry, princess. Sometimes you have to look out for yourself, even if it means taking something
that doesn’t technically belong to you. You need those clothes more than they do.”
I said nothing as I pulled the coat out of the bag and put it on. As luck would have it, it fit perfectly. I didn’t feel lucky, though. I felt ashamed. So far, I’d run away from home, broken traffic laws, and stolen other people’s property. What law was I going to break next? And what happened to the good girl that I used to be, the one that my parents raised me to be? I could feel pieces of her slipping between my fingers every day. If I kept this up, I might lose her forever…
***
CHAPTER 8
MORGAN
Axel was left–handed. I noticed that while watching him eat. A disproportionate large percentage of the lefties that I’d met happened to be artistically inclined, which made me wonder if he was too. I glanced around the room and spotted a rustic bookshelf stuffed to the brim with magazines, books and newspapers. The top shelf had been reserved for wooden figurines, which looked handmade. One in particular stood out to me. It was a rabbit mid–jump, suspended in the air by a thin metal rod. The texture was smooth, yet detailed, and I could tell that a lot of work had gone into it. It was beautiful.
Axel looked up from his plate and followed my gaze. He hummed. “Carved that one during a whiteout in 2014,” he said. “All I had to entertain myself with were my tools and my mind. Damn ears kept breaking off, and I had to keep starting over… But in the end, I think it turned out pretty well.”
“I think so too.” I smiled and stuck a piece of bacon into my mouth. “So, that’s your hobby? Wood carving?”
“Suppose so.” Axel shrugged. “That, and reading. On especially dreary nights I might have a couple of glasses of whiskey to liven things up, since that tends to make everything a little bit more interesting. What about you, princess?” He smirked at me. “What do you do between needlework lessons and lording over the peasants?”
I bit my tongue and turned my head away, refusing to give him the reaction that he was obviously fishing for. His question bothered me—not because he was teasing me like always, but because I didn’t know how to answer it. What did I do, besides cooking, cleaning and going to church? I couldn’t think of anything. As a child I used to read all the time—but time was something I found myself in short supply of nowadays. On the rare occasion that I did have an hour or two to myself, I preferred to catch up on sleep rather than opening up a new book that I would never have time to finish anyway.
“I used to read a lot,” I murmured wistfully. “Fantasy, romance, non–fiction—I didn’t care so much what the genre was, as long as it was interesting. During summer break, I could easily read a full–length novel per day. Now, though?” I shrugged apathetically. “Now it takes me a month to get through just one. There just aren’t enough hours in the day.”
Axel hummed. “I suppose this is almost like a vacation for you then,” he said. “Out here, there’s nothing but time.”
I smiled weakly. “Yes, I suppose so. If only I’d brought some books.”
“Well…” Axel shifted in his seat. “I don’t know how you feel about mystery, but my books are right there in the shelf. You can check them out.”
“I might do that,” I said and smiled at him. “Thank you.”
He grunted and turned back to his plate. There was bacon, eggs on toast, and beans in tomato sauce. I was struggling to finish mine, not because there was anything wrong with the taste, but because there was simply so much of it. Meanwhile, Axel was on his second serving.
“So, uh…” He cleared his throat. “Where are you heading once this weather clears up? What’s the plan?”
I looked down and took a deep breath. Thinking about the future made me feel nauseated, which is why I tried not to do it. I wished Axel hadn’t brought it up. “I haven’t really thought about it,” I mumbled.
“Well, you can’t stay here forever.” He chuckled awkwardly. “Sooner or later, we have to get you home.”
Home. Just the word itself made my chest feel heavy. Normally, I’d be at home right now, cooking David his lunch and breakfast before he had to leave for work. He was an incredibly picky eater—a fact which I blamed his mother for—and it was nice not to have to worry about what to put in his lunch box for once. I wondered how he was holding up without me… During the time we’d been together, I’d never seen him cook a meal for himself—let alone scrub a toilet or operate a vacuum cleaner. But household chores were the least of my concerns right now. I’d betrayed David by leaving, and if he ever got his hands on me again, there would be hell to pay…
“I can’t go home,” I said quietly. “It’s not safe.”
“I know. You said that already—whatever it means.” Axel leaned back in his seat and sighed heavily. “But there’s got to be somebody you can call; somebody who can help you. What about your parents?”
I shook my head. “No, they wouldn’t understand.”
“Siblings, then. You got any of those?”
“I have a sister, but I don’t know where she is.” I grimaced. “…I don’t even know if she’s alive.”
Axel furrowed his brows. “Does that have anything to do with what’s going on right now?”
“No, I don’t see how it would. I haven’t even seen her since she ran away, and that was years ago.” I sighed and sniffled quietly. I had no–one, except for myself. If only Axel would understand that already…
“I want to help you,” he said. “But I can’t. Not until you tell me what’s going on.”
I looked up at him wearily. I could trust him, couldn’t I? After all, if he was planning on hurting me, he probably would’ve done it already… “It’s my fiancé,” I said carefully. “David. I think he’s involved with some bad people.”
Axel nodded knowingly. “Could’ve guessed. When a woman goes missing, the first person the cops question is the husband. So, what’d he did? He hit you?”
“No. He didn’t hit me, but he… He, uh…” I fell silent. I knew what I wanted to say, but for some reason, when I tried to say it out loud, it was like I couldn’t form words with my mouth anymore.
“What?” Axel pressed.
I looked at him for a long moment. “What if you’re one of them?” I asked finally. “What if it wasn’t a coincidence that you found me in that parking lot?”
Axel scrunched up his face. “Do I look like the kind of man who’d hurt a woman?” He demanded angrily.
I bit my lip. Axel and I hadn’t spent that much time together, but I still felt like I understood him quite well. Yes, he was a brute, and he certainly knew how to press people’s buttons, but his heart was in the right place. He was no grizzly bear. He was a teddy. “No,” I admitted. But I didn’t think David was either, and what does that say about me?
Axel huffed, then he leaned forward and looked at me for a long moment. His face softened somewhat. “So, you’re all on your own?”
I nodded weakly.
Axel pushed back his chair and stood up. “Then you need to grow some claws, kitty.”
“What do you—” I began. Before I really realized what was happening, he reached across the table and snatched up my breakfast plate. “Hey!” I glared at him. “What are you doing?!”
He looked at me. “Teaching you.“
I stood up and reached for my plate, but he held it above my head where I couldn’t reach even when I stood on my toes. I grabbed his arm and tried to pull it down instead, but he was too strong. I glared at him, my cheeks burning bright red from the humiliation. “You jerk!“ I spat.
“That’s good,” he said. “But not good enough. Say it like you mean it!”
I could feel the anger bubbling inside of me, just below the surface. I was angry at Axel, at David, at my parents, and at everything that had ever gone wrong in my entire life. I was fed up. “Give me back my plate, you fucking thick–headed hermit!” I screeched and punched Axel in the arm as hard as I could—which, admittedly, wasn’t very hard. He didn’t even budge.
“That’s
more like it!” Axel praised me and lowered his arm. “That’s what I was looking for: that anger. Remember it. And the next time somebody tries to tell you to do something you don’t want to do, tap into it. Someone like your fiancé, for example…”
I snatched the plate out of his hand and climbed the steps to the loft without a word. I sat down in the very back corner and finished my breakfast, fuming. I hated being angry. I hated how warm and red my cheeks felt, the uncomfortable pounding of my heart, and how my whole body was hot and trembling. I’d spent my whole life burying that anger, and it took Axel all of one day to dig it back up again. Who the fuck did he think he was? He and his stupid teaching moments could fuck off.
I glared at the back of his head and muttered under my breath, “Asshole.“
***
CHAPTER 9
MORGAN
Axel was a jerk, but he was right about at least one thing: I couldn’t make it all on my own. I would have to suck it up and call my parents after all. There was a problem, though. I’d dropped my phone in the hotel parking lot when I was running away from David, and Axel didn’t even own a phone that I could borrow. He offered to give me a ride to the bar so I could use the phone there. I agreed somewhat begrudgingly, because the last thing I wanted was to go somewhere with him. I was still upset about the stunt he pulled at breakfast. But then again, I thought. Just because we’re sitting next to each other, that doesn’t mean I have to talk to him…