by Stacy Eaton
She took a small spoonful and blew on it before putting it into her mouth. I was mesmerized by the way her lips curled around the spoon, and I jerked my gaze away and took a seat.
“Yes, Carol did say that, but I don’t want to impose. Besides, I have a really crazy schedule right now.”
“Tell me about it,” I said as I dug into my chili.
As we ate, Davina told me about her work at Treemont Industries and her classes to get her master’s degree. I didn’t mention that I’d probably tested some of her projects, but instead, I listened to her. She was a very intelligent woman, and I found myself rather intrigued by her analytical mind.
When she grew quiet, I found myself missing her voice. “Tell me about Carol. You said you had known her for a long time.” I paused. “You were right when you said that I didn’t know her that well, but I think you can help me to know her better.”
“Why would you want to know her better? She’s not here anymore.”
“Because I want to be able to tell Devon about his mother.”
She watched me for a few seconds. “You’re really going to keep him?”
“Yes, I’m going to keep him. He’s my son. You said she grew up in foster care; I don’t want Devon to grow up like that. I might not be much of a father, but I’ll try to do the best that I can for him.”
She smiled, her eyes brightening for the first time since she’d gotten up. “I’m happy to hear that. Carol would be too.”
“So, tell me about Carol.”
Davina laughed. “She called me Vina. I met her in high school, and we became instant friends. She had been in four or five foster homes by that time, and she didn’t make friends easily. I didn’t either; I was a total geek in school with my head wrapped around mathematics and computer equations. Somehow we clicked.” She paused, smiling to herself. “She called me Vina the nerd, but always with a smile.”
I listened to her continue to tell me about their friendship and a few things they had done in high school. Davina had gone away to college, and Carol had followed her a semester later. The two of them had been inseparable, and I envied that.
For a long time, they’d been roommates, and then Carol landed a big job at a marketing firm and moved into her own place, but it was in the same building as hers. They were never far apart and shared just about everything.
Our food was long gone, and Devon was sleeping in her arms as she finally stopped and hung her head for a moment. “I’m really going to miss her.”
I reached out and put my hand on her arm, and she lifted her sad eyes to me. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry that she’s gone, and I’m sorry that you feel I’m to blame for it.”
She wiped at her cheek where a tear had slipped down. “I needed someone to blame; you were the easiest one. I know that’s not fair.”
“You can blame me, Davina. I’ll let you.”
We stared at each other, and her whiskey eyes seemed to drink me in. Finally, I slipped my hand off her arm and glanced away, breaking the moment.
“Let me clean up the kitchen and get dressed, and then we can go.”
“I’ll get a bottle ready for Devon while you get dressed. He’ll want to eat soon, I’m sure.”
I was almost done cleaning up the kitchen when there was a knock at my front door. I hadn’t heard from anyone today, but I had to assume that was someone checking up on me.
Davina was digging around in the baby bag for something as I took the stairs down to my door. “Alex, Lexi, I’m surprised to see you two.” I held the door open.
“Are you kidding?” Lexi said as she slipped quickly past me. “I was dying to see that little guy again. Where is he?”
I pointed up the stairs. “He’s with Davina.”
Alex paused beside me, an eyebrow raised. “Davina is here?”
I laughed momentarily. “Yeah, I about lost my mind last night when he wouldn’t stop crying and practically begged her to come over and help me.”
“Oh, is that why?” he said so softly that I didn’t think Lexi had heard him as she reached the top of the stairs.
I glanced at Alex before I closed the door. “Why would there be any other reason?”
He laughed softly and shook his head but didn’t reply as he took the steps two at a time. In the living room, Lexi had taken Devon from Davina, and I quickly introduced everyone officially.
“He’s such a handsome boy,” Lexi cooed as she touched his face and then leaned down and inhaled deeply. “God, I love the smell of babies.”
Alex glanced at me and rolled his eyes, and I slapped him on the back as I stepped past him and stood next to Davina.
“What are you guys doing here?”
“We wanted to make sure you were both alive,” Lexi said. “Sorry we couldn’t stay last night, but we had other plans.”
“That’s okay. Davina was able to help me out.” As I’d spoken, I’d put my hand on her shoulder, and she’d glanced up at me. For a moment, the two of us locked eyes again, and then as if in mutual consent, we quickly looked away. I let my hand drop as I stepped away. “Can you guys give me a minute? I was about to get changed.”
“Take your time,” Lexi said as she bounced Devon in her arms. I heard her saying something to Davina about being sorry for her loss as I went into my room. I had barely closed the door when a knock sounded and it opened. Alex stepped in and closed the door behind him.
“How are you holding up?”
“Well, thanks to Davina, I was able to get six hours of sleep.”
“Did she stay all night?”
“She did. She was working, so she watched him while I slept. After I got up, she took a nap. We just ate, and now we were going to head over to Carol’s, and I was going to pick up the rest of the things that she had for Devon.”
“You’re going to keep him?” he asked, surprise in his voice that irked me.
“Yeah, he’s my son.”
Alex laughed. “Man, I never expected you to ever have a kid. How are you going to handle traveling?”
I tossed a pair of jeans down on the bed from the closet. “I have no clue. I guess I’ll have to get a nanny for him.”
“A nanny? You with a nanny?” He barked out a laugh.
“Hey, it’s not funny. I’m not sure what the hell I’m going to do, but I know that Carol wanted me to raise our son, and that’s what I’m going to do. This might be the only chance I ever have at being a father, so I might as well make the best of it.”
“Trev, no offense, but I never pictured you as a father.”
“Yeah, well, neither did I, but I am.”
“You know that Lexi and I will help any way that we can.”
“I appreciate that, but to be honest, I think I need to figure most of this out on my own.”
“You think you can do that?”
“Do I have a choice?”
“No, probably not, but you do have Davina. Will she help you?”
“I hope so. I know this isn’t her kid, but she was really close to Carol. I hope that she is willing to remain in Devon’s life.”
“Is that the only reason?”
I stared at him, confused. “What other reason would there be?”
Alex started to laugh. “You are really clueless sometimes, you know that, Trev?”
Chapter Ten
Davina
As Trevor went down to get the door, I fretted. I didn’t want to like him, but I did. Over lunch, I’d enjoyed telling him about my job and my friendship with Carol. On both subjects, he had seemed genuinely interested, and when he had reached out to me and told me how sorry he was about Carol and that I could blame him, I realized that I didn’t want to.
I didn’t want to blame anyone, least of all him.
I remember when Carol had told me that she had met someone. She said he was sweet, funny, intelligent, and very masculine. She’d told me that even I would have liked him, but I’d laughed it off. I had never been a fan of who she dated; it was the one thing we ne
ver agreed on, but this was different. For once, I did agree, well, mostly. I hadn’t seen the funny side of him, but he could be sweet, and he was very smart. As for masculine, well, my hormones had been in overdrive since I’d walked in the door.
What would it be like to kiss him?
That thought quickly departed my brain as a woman stepped up on the landing. I held Devon a little tighter, wondering if this was one of Trevor’s lady friends. Was this his current weekend retreat woman?
“Hi, I’m Lexi. I think you met my fiancé yesterday at the office, Alex?” She smiled kindly at me, and I was more relieved than I should be that she was engaged to someone else.
“Davina,” I responded.
“Can I hold him, please?” she asked softly and clasped her hands to her chest as if begging me to say yes.
“Of course.” I held him out to her, and she quickly curled him to her breast as the men came up the stairs.
I was surprised when Trevor came to my side and even more surprised when he put his hand on my shoulder. I turned to look at him and found myself staring into bright-blue eyes that looked much more relaxed than they had a few minutes ago. Man, he had gorgeous eyes.
No, no, no! I told myself as I turned away. You are not going there, Davina!
He disappeared into his room to get dressed, and Alex followed him and closed the door. Lexi was smiling at the door and shook her head before putting her attention back on Devon.
“You are such a handsome boy. Yes, you are,” Lexi cooed toward him, and I found myself smiling. “I hope my baby is half as handsome as you are.”
“Are you pregnant?”
She grinned at me. “Yes, I am. Almost three months along.”
“That’s wonderful,” I said with a smile. “You mentioned you were engaged. Are you and Alex going to wait until after the baby is born to tie the knot?”
She shook her head. “Nope, we are getting married next weekend.” She eyed me carefully. “Trevor should bring you as his date.”
I barked out a laugh. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”
“Why not? He’s single, and I assume you are single, too. He’s Alex’s best man; he should come with a date.”
I laughed uneasily. “We don’t particularly have the best relationship. I mean, I’m only here to help with Devon anyway. It’s a one-time thing, you know? I’m sure after he picks up all the stuff from Carol’s place, we won’t see each other again.”
“When is he supposed to get the stuff from Carol’s?”
“In a little while. That’s why he’s getting dressed so that we can go over.”
“Were you planning on taking the baby with you?”
“Yes,” I stated.
“Now you don’t have to. Alex and I can watch him. We don’t have any plans until later today, and I’d love to spend time with this little guy. It will give you and Trevor the time you need to get his stuff packed and get to know each other a little better.”
“We don’t need to get to know each other,” I stated.
She shrugged with a grin. “Well, I tried, but I can still watch him for you two.”
I turned away and began to put my laptops back into my bag. “You’ll have to ask his father. I have no say in the matter.”
“Okay,” she responded and directed her attention back to Devon until Alex and Trevor came out of the bedroom. My gaze slipped down the denim-clad legs and then back up to the white t-shirt tucked into the waistband. The blue-and-white long-sleeve flannel over the top of that made his blue eyes brighter. I swallowed and forced myself to look away before I started to drool.
How can any man look that good in flannel and jeans? I mean, come on. I shook my head as Lexi spoke up excitedly. “Alex and I are going to watch Devon this afternoon. So make sure to pack up his diaper bag.”
“What?” Trevor stopped in mid-step, and Alex looked just as surprised.
“Aren’t you and Davina going to get his stuff from his mother’s place?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“So, you can’t watch a baby and move things around. I’ll take him for the afternoon. It will be good practice.”
“Lexi, we have to get Nica in a few hours.”
“Veronica won’t mind. She loves babies, too.”
Alex rolled his eyes. “If that’s what you want, honey.”
“Yes,” Lexi replied quickly, and my gaze shifted to Trevor who looked a little nervous as he stared at Lexi holding the baby.
“Are you sure, Lex? I know you get tired and everything; I don’t want this to wear you out.”
“I’m fine. Alex is too worried about me. Pack his bag, and we can take him with us. Then you’ll have the afternoon to get things together, and you can pick him up from our place later, say around dinner.”
“Really?”
“Yes.” Lexi grinned at him, and I saw Trevor relax.
“Okay, thanks, Lexi. It will be easier without having to worry about him.”
I watched as Trevor went through the diaper bag and wandered over his way. “Don’t forget this.” I handed him the wipes. “They are kind of important.”
He glanced my way, smiling so brightly that it almost took my breath away. “Thanks.”
I quickly shuffled off to the side and waited while Alex, Trevor, and Lexi talked about things for the afternoon. There was laughter and smiles amongst the three of them, and I found myself quietly envying them. Carol had been my only real friend, and her absence suddenly felt like a weight tied to my leg in the ocean current.
We were getting ready to leave when Lexi glanced at me and then turned to Trevor. “You know, have you thought about what you are going to do with Devon next weekend for the wedding?”
“Oh, shit!” Trevor muttered. “I didn’t even think about that. I guess I need to find a babysitter.”
I was about to open my mouth and tell him that I might know someone when Trevor turned to me. “Davina, would you be able to watch Devon next weekend while I attend their wedding?”
“Wait, no! You can’t ask Davina to watch Devon,” Lexi said quickly.
“Why not?”
Lexi rolled her eyes. “Because you need a date.”
“I already told you, Lexi, I’m coming alone. Isn’t Clare coming alone, too? We can hang out together.”
I pursed my lips at the mention of another single woman. I had no claim over him, but now that he had a son, shouldn’t he clean up his act?
“Clare has a date,” Lexi said quickly. “A last-minute date, so you shouldn’t come alone.” She turned to me. “You’ll be his date, right?”
“Um, no. I think I prefer Trevor’s idea that I watch Devon instead.”
Trevor grinned. “See, all fixed, and I don’t need a date, Lexi.” He winked at her, and I felt a little bit better about the fact that he was going alone.
I turned away quickly. “Um, I’m going to head back to my place. I’ll meet you at Carol’s in a little while.”
A hand reached out and grabbed my arm. “What’s the address?”
I stared at him. “You don’t even know where she lived?”
He shook his head. “No, I met her places.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why am I not surprised.” I gave him the address, waved goodbye to Lexi and Alex, and hustled out to my car.
At least I’d get a chance to see Devon next week when I babysat him. I frowned as I started my vehicle. Lexi had been trying to get Trevor to invite me as his date. Obviously, I didn’t measure up. My level was babysitter, not date. I sighed; why did it even matter? I wasn’t interested in a man like Trevor Vaughn.
When I got home, I dropped my laptop bag inside the door and went straight to my bedroom. I quickly grabbed a change of clothes and hurried into the shower. I hadn’t had one in two days, and while I knew I would possibly get sweaty moving things around with Trevor, I didn’t want to be dirty and smelly. Not that he would even notice, but I would.
I received a text from him as I got dressed and told him I’d
be up in a minute. Carol’s apartment was one floor above mine. I pulled my hair back in my standard messy bun and shoved my feet into sneakers before grabbing my phone and the keys to her apartment.
My stomach rolled as I climbed the steps. Not because I was going to be seeing Trevor again, but because I was going to be stepping into Carol’s place. How many nights had we kicked back on her couch, drank a bottle of wine or something stronger, and watched movies or talked about life? Too many to count.
I turned the corner onto her floor and found Trevor leaning back against the wall staring at her door. He must have heard me because he quickly turned and straightened. His gaze drifted down my body and back up, and I swear that there was something like approval in his eyes as they landed on mine. What did he approve of?
“Sorry,” I said softly as I passed him and went to unlock the door. I turned the key and then paused, preparing myself for the onslaught of memories that would come once I opened it.
“You okay?” Trevor asked quietly from right behind me.
I nodded. “Yeah, I’m just—”
His hand touched my shoulder, and he squeezed. “It’s okay, I get it. Take the time that you need.”
I glanced back at him and saw a true understanding in his gaze. It told me something about him. Told me he understood loss, and that made me a little sad to know.
I inhaled and then pushed open the door, leaving it open behind me as I forced myself to walk into her small living room and look around. I was instantly bombarded with memories. Little blips of time: sounds, words, images all collided with one another trying to get their ten seconds in the spotlight. It made me want to drop to my knees and scream! My eyes filled with tears, and then I felt an arm wrap around my back. A solid warm body stood beside me, and I leaned into it as tears slowly slid down my cheeks.
The pillows that we’d hit each other with, the book that I’d given her for her birthday, the new curtains that we’d hung together, the bag of her favorite candy sitting on the coffee table. All of it screamed at me, and my knees went weak. I felt my body shift, and then strong arms were around me again, holding me tightly as I burrowed into the fabric in front of me. Soft words were spoken, but I only heard Carol’s voice, her laughter, her anguish, her dreams, and her fears.