by Stacy Eaton
“No, I have a nanny starting tomorrow,” I told her softly as the urge to pick up my son and hold him close struck me.
“You found one? You sure you want to leave him with a stranger this soon? I don’t mind watching him for a little while.”
“Devon is going to have to get used to this sooner or later. Tonya, the nanny, will be good. She’s got a lot of experience, even if she is young.”
“Well, make sure she has my number. I will help if she needs anything.”
“I appreciate that, Lexi. I really do. I might need you to check in on her. My stuff is being moved over to the new house this weekend, and I hate that I’m leaving it all to her to unpack, but I don’t have much choice.”
“Don’t worry about it. I can oversee it if you’d like.”
I squeezed her shoulder as Alex walked into the room from the garage carrying Chinese takeout. “Hey, isn’t Davina enough for you? You have to put your hands on my woman now?”
We all laughed, and I didn’t bother to reply. Davina was the last thing I wanted to talk about at the moment. Unfortunately, these two didn’t realize that.
“Speaking of Davina, you two couldn’t seem to keep your hands off each other at the wedding.” Lexi grinned as she took a seat.
“How are things going with you two?” Alex added as he pulled the food out of the bag.
I cleared my throat, not sure what to say right away, and Lexi must have read my face. Her hand shot out to my arm. “Oh, no. Things aren’t working out? I thought for sure you two would hit it off and build something.”
“To be honest, I thought that too, but it seems my past is too much for her to deal with.”
“What?” Alex barked with a laugh. “What past?”
“Well, my weekend with her best friend that ended with me being a father, for one.”
“Yeah, but she loves Devon too. It’s so obvious,” Lexi commented.
“I know she does, but—” I heaved out a heavy breath. “She was in the office today when Whitney showed up. It was almost like an overindulged replay of when she came to tell me about Devon. When I escorted Whitney into the conference room to speak to her about what was going on, Davina bolted.”
Lexi’s jaw dropped as Alex laughed and said, “Did she think that the little girl was yours?”
I hiked a brow, and he chuckled. “Yeah, don’t answer that. I bet she did. Have you tried to talk to her?”
“Yeah, when would I have had the time?”
“Trevor, if you care about her, then you need to find the time.” Lexi squeezed my arm.
“I will, Lex, when I get back. Right now, I need to get myself moved into the house and get Tonya somewhat acclimated to Devon’s schedule. Then I can figure things out with her.”
“You are going to get things figured out, right?”
I stared into Lexi’s bright eyes. “I’m not letting her go, Lex. I’m crazy about Davina, and she will be part of my life.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Davina
I didn’t want to get out of bed the next day. Nor the one after that, or the one after that, but I did. I would have been content to sleep away the days and live in the dreams that I had, rather than the reality that was my life.
Here I had thought that I had Trevor all wrong, and I had been thankful that he’d asked me to wait for him. I had wanted to apologize, ask him if we could talk. See if I could right my wrongs and find out if there would be a future.
Seeing another woman fall into his arms and passionately state that she had been searching everywhere for him, had made my blood run cold. Did he have half a dozen children running around without him?
I could have enjoyed a relationship with him with just Devon, maybe one of our own children in the future. What I couldn’t imagine was opening the door to more children from a multitude of romantic weekend interludes. I just didn’t have that in me.
It was Sunday now, and I padded up to the third floor with my to-go mug of coffee and let myself into Carol’s apartment one last time. Tomorrow I would be handing the keys over to the management office. Last week, two different charity companies had come to collect all of her belongings that I was not keeping. It had been gut-wrenching to watch them leave, but what was I to do.
It was time to let go of the past, and maybe that meant letting go of Devon too. I sank to the carpet in the middle of the barren living room and let myself cry. I cried for Carol, for Devon and myself. I curled up in a ball and ran through a million memories, then rolled to my back and stared at the ceiling. I had no idea how long I had been there when I finally dragged my ass off the floor and walked the apartment one last time.
There were no sounds nor laughter as I stood in her room staring at the spot where the lightning bolt painting had once hung. I had almost kept it, but after the incident with Trevor, I couldn’t bear to look at it. Part of me wished that I had, if only to keep a memory of our night together.
I let myself out of the apartment, locking the door behind me, and headed back to my apartment. A glance at my stove told me I’d been gone four hours; no wonder I was starving. I made myself a sandwich and then curled on my couch.
I unlocked my phone and found a missed call. My heart sped up as I realized that Trevor had called me about an hour ago. There was no message, and I wondered what he was going to try to say about what I had witnessed on Thursday. I tossed my phone to the side, picked up the remote, and found a good sappy chick flick to watch.
That’s how my next week went. I worked during the day, watching stupid romance movies at night, and cried myself to sleep. By the end of the week, I’d had enough of my own self-pity and decided that on Monday, I was going to get back with the program. No more feeling sorry for myself. I was going to work; I was going to force myself to get out of the house, meet new people, have some fun, and move forward with my life. Trevor and Devon were my past.
That’s why on the following Sunday morning, I pulled out the guardianship papers and stared at them. I never had notified the courts that Trevor had taken custody of Devon. I guess that was going to be one of the first things that I did this coming week.
I was getting ready for bed when my phone rang, and I saw a number I didn’t know. Since I hadn’t spoken to anyone in days, I figured it couldn’t hurt to at least talk to a telemarketer for a little while, and I answered my phone.
“Davina!” a woman practically shouted over the phone. “It’s Lexi Miller.”
I jerked back in surprise. “Lexi, what’s going on?”
“It’s Devon.”
My heart tripped over itself as the room spun. “What’s wrong with Devon?”
“We don’t know. Do you still have the guardianship papers that say you have power of attorney over him?”
“Yes, why?”
“Because I need you to get to the hospital so they can work on him. You have to permit them to run tests and figure out what is wrong.”
“Why can’t Trevor do that?”
“Because Trevor is overseas.” I was quiet for so long she spoke again. “Davina, are you there?”
That spurred me into action, and I raced out to my desk. “I’m here. I have the paperwork; what hospital?”
“Rikers Memorial. I’ll see you there.”
She hung up before I could say another word, and I quickly yanked on my shoes, grabbed a sweatshirt off the top of my laundry pile, then collected my purse and the paperwork before I raced out the door. My heart thudded so hard against my chest wall that I wondered if it would break through, and my hands shook so badly I could barely hold my car keys.
In my car, I forced myself to calm down before I put the car in gear, and then I was on the road. Nothing could happen to Devon. “Oh, dear God, please let him be alright. Please!”
As I neared the hospital, my brain started to work a little more. Was Lexi watching Devon while Trevor was gone? Is that why Trevor hadn’t tried to call me, because he was out of town?
“Forget about yo
urself, Vina,” I growled as I parked. “This is about Devon, not your broken heart.”
I grabbed my purse and raced into the hospital emergency room, hoping that was where they were. If they weren’t, I’d have to call Lexi back and find out the location. Luckily, she was pacing inside the waiting room. She threw her arms around me as another young woman stood beside her.
“This is Tonya, his nanny.” I didn’t mean to glare at the pretty young woman, but I think it happened anyway because she shifted back slightly.
“What is going on? Where is he?”
“They won’t let us back there because we aren’t family,” Lexi said as she ushered me to the front desk. “This is his guardian.”
I pulled out the paperwork. “I’m Davina Daniels. I have the paperwork to show I’m his guardian.”
She glanced over the paperwork and handed it back to me. “I’ll let the nurse know.”
“What happened?” I asked her, and she waved Tonya over.
“Tonya can tell you.”
“He had been acting really fussy, like seriously fussy. I thought maybe he was just constipated, or not feeling well, but then he just kept crying, and if I touched his belly, it would get worse. He barely peed today, and he hasn’t pooped in two days. I finally called his doctor, and they told me to get him to the hospital. Then I called Lexi.”
“Has anyone tried to reach Trevor?”
“He’s unreachable,” Lexi stated. “They are dealing with a crisis overseas. That’s why you haven’t heard from Trevor. He had to leave last Sunday.”
Had the call from him been to let me know he was going? God, why hadn’t I had my phone with me? Why hadn’t he left a message?
Before I could say anything, the door behind me opened. “Ms. Daniels?”
“That’s me,” I quickly said and approached her.
“Come with me, and I’ll take you back to Devon.” She turned to Lexi and Tonya. “I’m sorry, but you’ll have to stay out here right now.”
They nodded, and I turned to Lexi. “I’ll let you know as soon as I know something.”
She grabbed my hand and squeezed, and then I was running to catch up to the nurse who had already walked away. I slammed to a stop at the doorway to where Devon was. There was a tube running into his nose, and he was red from crying while someone pushed on his belly. I wanted to smack the person and shove them away, but I knew they were trying to help him.
“Dr. Jones, this is Ms. Daniels. She’s Devon’s guardian.”
He lifted serious brown eyes to me. “Glad you are here.” He looked over my shoulder at someone behind me. “Get the papers for her to sign.”
“Sign?” I squeaked.
“This little guy needs to go into surgery. We were just waiting for someone to sign them.”
“Surgery?” I slumped against the wall beside me.
“Yes, he has intestinal malrotation, and he needs surgery to fix it before his bowel tissue dies.”
“Oh, my God!” I rushed to Devon’s side. “Oh, my God! Is he going to be alright?”
“After surgery, he will be. Ms. Daniels, it’s an easy surgery and a regular occurrence in children. Happens in one out of every five hundred.”
A nurse showed up at my side and handed me a clipboard. “I’ll need a copy of your guardianship papers, too,” she said softly.
“What am I signing?”
“You are permitting him to undergo surgery, which will require him to be put to sleep.” She turned to the next one and began to tell me about the side effects of being put to sleep, and then another page to tell me what could possibly go wrong with the surgery. My head spun, and I must have looked like I was going to pass out because she led me to a chair and told me to have a seat.
Put to sleep, like a dog? No, no! My head cried, not put to sleep like a dog, but put to sleep so they could operate on him. Operate! I thought I was going to barf.
“Ma’am, are you alright?”
“Alright? No! Nothing about this is alright!” I stared at Devon as tears raced down my cheeks.
The doctor lifted the stethoscope from Devon’s chest and looked at me. “I promise you that he is going to make it out of this fine. I’ve done a hundred of these, and once they are done, the recovery will be easy for him. The chances that there will be any problems are slim.”
His words eased my nerves slightly, and I asked where I was supposed to sign. The nurse pointed out the spots and then asked for my papers again.
He turned to the nurse right before she left the room. “As soon as you get back, get him upstairs.”
“Yes, Doctor.”
“And make note that he has a slight heart murmur that we need to look into more.”
“A heart murmur?” I repeated.
“Nothing to worry about right now, most kids grow out of them.”
“His mother died from a heart condition. Her doctors wanted her to terminate her pregnancy. She died in childbirth.”
“That’s good information to know. Do you want to give him a kiss before he goes up? I’d let you hold him, but the more he moves, the more pain he will be in.”
I was on my feet, standing at the side of the little cradle. “Baby, I’m here, sweetie. Aunt Davina is here, honey. I love you so much. You’re going to be alright, and when Daddy gets home, you’ll be all smiles again.”
The nurse reappeared as I swiped the tears from my cheeks. “I have to take him up now.”
“What do I do?”
“You can get your friends and head up to the fifth floor. There is a waiting room; just look for the signs when you get off the elevator.”
Without another word, she rushed him from the room, his painful squalls knocking me to my knees as I began to pray again.
I managed to pull myself together and found the waiting room where Lexi and Tonya were. Lexi jumped to her feet, her hand going to her mouth as she saw me.
“He’s going into surgery.”
Tonya began to cry. “Did I do something to hurt him?”
“No, honey,” I went to her and put my arms around her. “The doctor said it happens all the time, but he has something called intestinal malrotation, and they need to do surgery to repair it.”
Lexi was on her phone typing something and then began to read from the website she had just searched it on.
“We can go up and wait in the waiting room on the fifth floor,” I said, and the three of us started down the hall to find it.
“When is Trevor going to be reachable?” I asked as we climbed into the elevator.
“I don’t know. They have been off the grid for three days. Probably a few more,” Lexi said softly.
I stared at the door as it closed, praying that Devon was going to make it, because I sure as hell wasn’t going to deliver that bad news to his father.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Trevor
This fucking sucked. There was no other way to describe the shit we had been through. When we arrived, our transportation was nowhere to be found. The military unit that we were supposed to meet up with for some intelligence assistance had no idea why we were there, and Greg came down with a stomach bug on top of it.
Once we had gotten all of that worked out, we were two days in, and we’d accomplished next to nothing. Finally, a plan was put in place and we had enough intelligence to move forward. We met up with a few more Protag operatives who were thankful that we were there to help. They had been asking, although one guy said begging, for the help, but the home office had been leery about getting others involved.
My thought that they had already written the guys off put a really bad taste in my mouth, and I had no problem vocalizing my thoughts. Those first few days there was a lot of downtime, and I spent most of it shooting the shit with the guys and dwelling on what was going on back home.
Tonya had taken it better than expected when I dropped the bomb about going away and having to leave her in a brand-new house where practically everything was still in boxes. Hell, even
my room wasn’t organized yet. I’d pulled out my gear for the trip, the sheets for the bed, and that’s about it.
The two things I dwelled over most were Devon and how the hell I was going to get Davina back. I could only hope that between Tonya and Lexi, Devon was doing well. He was a baby; how much trouble could the little guy get into?
As for Davina, I missed her something fierce. That’s why seven days later, as we finally prepared to go after the group of missing persons, I turned to Alex. “I get it now.”
“What?”
“Why you wanted to stop traveling.”
“Oh, don’t you even fucking start, Thumper,” Jake growled. “You are not quitting. I’ll fire your ass first.”
“Shove it, Screamer,” I barked back. “I wasn’t talking to you.”
Alex chuckled as he adjusted his helmet. “Yeah, having a kid and woman at home makes it hard to leave them, especially at our age.”
“We’ve lived through so much.”
“Yes, back then we didn’t have much to live for,” he replied. “I mean, I had Nica, but I knew that she had a mother and a father who would look after her if I didn’t come home. Lex has me, and our baby, and now you have Devon and Davina.”
“Well, I have Devon,” I said.
He thumped me on the shoulder. “You’ll get Davina back. I feel it in my bones.”
Harvey started rapping out next to me. “I feel it in my bones, deep down it feels just right. We’re gonna grind it out, gonna rock the world tonight.”
Everyone started laughing, and then we joked around a bit more as Harvey tossed out a few more rap lyrics that he was pulling from his ass. It helped calm the nerves in the van before we reached our location.
There were some butt pucker moments, a few what-the-fucks, and quite a bit of gunfire before we finally found what we were looking for—three employees of Protag and six civilians. Four of them were injured, none life-threatening, and after getting them out of there, it took three more days to get to safety.
The minute we had them back to safety, Alex was on his phone. I’d call Tonya a bit later once I’d gotten a chance to shower and change clothes. Now, if I had Davina waiting at home, I’d be on the phone to her in a heartbeat.