by J. L. Leslie
When I get to Jack’s, I see Jade behind the bar. She’s having a hushed conversation with Casey, but after her ditching me this morning, I don’t mind interrupting. They both get quiet when I approach. I lean over the bar and Jade meets me halfway for a quick kiss.
“I missed you this morning.” Instead of commenting, she starts mixing drinks for a couple at the end of the bar. “I have to go to Dallas tomorrow. Do you think you can come?”
“I have to work,” she answers, quickly.
“I thought you were off.”
“I...”
“I asked her to cover my shift,” Casey chimes in. “I have to go into Redbud and get some things for school.”
“Oh. I just have to help Landon with some work stuff. It won’t take me long,” I assure her. “Come up after your shift tonight?”
She nods and I head to my apartment with a sick feeling in my gut. I’m pretty sure Casey was covering for Jade, but why? I shower and settle on my bed. I text Landon and let him know I’ll see him tomorrow. I turn my television on and channel surf until I find some re-runs of Criminal Minds. I wait on Jade to come to me, but she never shows up.
When I wake up in the morning, I have a text from her apologizing. She didn’t feel well so she went home. I call and check on her while I’m on the road.
“I just wasn’t feeling well, Madden. I didn’t want to bother you,” she says, her voice weak.
“Baby, you would never bother me. I would’ve taken care of you,” I say, trying to hide my annoyance. “I’ll check on you when I get back from Dallas. Get some rest.”
A few hours later, I enter the gates of Steele Industries. Walking through my father’s business feels strange. I feel welcome, but not at home. I know this business like the back of my hand, but I have no desire to work here. No passion for it.
Landon on the other hand, is a natural at it. He thrives here. Steele Industries is pretty much his life and I know my father couldn’t be prouder of him. Landon rarely disappoints. When I get to his office, he seems like he’s in his element. Stacks of files cover his desk and his phone is ringing off the hook, yet he’s not stressed.
“Drayton Wexler is a prick,” he complains.
“Yes, he is. What does he want this time?” I ask.
“He just wants his quarterly report read. As if a fucking intern can’t do that for him.”
“Keegan babies him too much. I’ll tell him he can communicate with you, too. Maybe that’ll smooth the transition for him,” I offer.
I walk down the hall to my office and turn my computer on. I take care of Drayton Wexler and while I’m there, I go ahead and handle my other accounts. I inform them I’m on leave and advise them to speak with Landon or Keegan regarding their business. Despite not working here full time, I realize I still accumulated quite a few loyal accounts. Had I taken my place here right after graduation, I would’ve had my hands full.
By the time I’m done, it’s nearly five o’clock. I hadn’t even realized I’d been here that long. I shut my computer down just as Landon peeks his head in my office.
“You want to grab dinner?” he offers.
“Let me call Jade first.”
I’m disappointed when I get her voicemail, but assume she’s either still not feeling well or at work and the bar must be busy. I let her know I’m going to be back later than planned.
Landon and I choose one of our favorite steakhouses and once we’ve ordered, he starts grilling me.
“So, you’re not coming back to work at Steele Industries?” he asks and I shake my head no. “I’m not judging you, little brother, just surprised. Is this all for a piece of ass or because you really don’t want to work there?”
“When I left Dallas, it was because of Amelia. Because I couldn’t have her. It really had nothing to do with not wanting to work for the company,” I answer.
“So, why are you not coming back? I mean, you’re over Amelia now.”
“Yeah.” I laugh. “I could come back if I wanted to.”
“That’s my point, Madden. Why aren’t you?” he prods.
“I like Jade. I really don’t want to work for Steele Industries,” I answer. “Simple.”
“Simple? That’s bullshit, Madden. You don’t love Jade. You like her. Yet, you’re willing to give up everything for her? And, so what, you don’t want to work for Dad. That doesn’t mean you have to move away from your family. You can still live in Dallas. I don’t get it.”
“Did Dad put you up to this?” I ask.
“No, he didn’t have to,” he states. “You have family here, Madden. Family who cares about you. I don’t understand why you’re willing to throw that all away. I like Jade. I like the two of you together, but Jade can be with you here in Dallas. You belong here.”
“Maybe one day she will, but not today. Landon, you have to understand, I want to live my own life. Make my own decisions without Dad hovering over me. Steele Industries is not my future.”
“Fine,” he says.
“Fine,” I repeat.
We stare at each other for a moment and then he shakes his head, accepting that I’m not giving in. We eat and chat about his latest business trip.
“You should stay in Dallas tonight. It’s late,” Landon offers. “You can stay at my house. No need to go home.”
I check the time and it’s half past nine already. I hadn’t realized we’d been here that long. I know Caleb gave me the rest of the week off, but I had no intention of taking it. Still, I’ve missed my brother.
“Okay. I’ll see you there,” I agree.
I call Jade on my way to Landon’s and get her voicemail again. I let her know that I’m staying with Landon and I’ll be back tomorrow.
“I miss you, Jade,” I say and disconnect.
Chapter Forty-Three
Jade
I sit outside on my porch with Casey, both of us sipping on lemonade and enjoying the short time we have before we have to go into work. I slowly rock the chair back and forth, knowing this reprieve won’t last long.
Madden will be back soon, and I can either continue trying to avoid him or finally face him and get this over with. I’ve been playing this game of push and pull since the wedding. Clinging to him when we make love but pushing him away when we aren’t behind closed doors. I’ll admit, I’m exhausted from it. I know I’m hurting him, and it kills me. I wanted to hang onto him for as long as I could, enjoy our time together before I eventually end things, but knowing that ending is looming is agonizing.
I have played out all of the possible scenarios, especially the scenario where I don’t convince him to go back to Dallas. He would stay here in Hollis working construction. We would eventually save up enough money to get our own place. Marriage, kids, and living paycheck to paycheck will soon take its toll on our relationship. The knowledge that thousands and thousands of dollars was thrown away for that life will grow into resentment and he’ll ask for a divorce. His parents will be so ecstatic, he’ll be welcomed back with open arms and rue the day he turned his back on them.
At least, that’s the way I see that scenario playing out.
“I think you’re making a huge mistake,” Casey says.
“You’ve told me that already.”
“Yeah, but you don’t seem to be listening. He wasn’t buying the whole bit about you covering a shift for me yesterday. He knows you, Jade. You can’t put him off forever.”
“I’m not planning on it. I’ll talk to him when he gets back from Dallas.”
Casey shifts in the seat, putting her glass of lemonade on the table between us. “And what are you going to say? Go back to Dallas so you can get your trust fund?”
“Nope.” I shake my head. “I’m going to tell him I got back with Brady.”
“Bullshit!”
“He can’t stay here, Casey. His life is in Dallas and I’m not going to take all of that away from him. He’ll wind up resenting me in the long run.”
“I think that’s his decision
to make.”
“His mom wrote me a check for a hundred grand. Her way of getting me to convince him to go home.”
“Are you fucking with me? A hundred grand?” Casey asks. “What a bitch!”
I roll my eyes. “It’s a hundred grand, Casey. That’s more money than I have ever dreamed of having.”
“Mm-hmm. And I just bet you went straight to the bank and deposited it, too.” When I don’t reply, she says, “I didn’t think so. Jade, you are in love with this guy. Don’t let anyone get in the way of that.”
“Like you are?” She flinches, stunned that I’m calling her out. “You love Caleb but you’re letting Tori dictate whether or not the two of you are together. You know damn well he doesn’t give a crap about her.”
“And you know damn well Madden doesn’t give a crap about his family’s money, otherwise, he would’ve gone home already.”
“I can’t be the reason he gives everything up, Casey. You don’t know what all he has to lose.”
She stands up, grabbing her purse from the porch. “If he loses you, he’s lost a hell of a lot in my opinion.”
I watch my best friend walk off, knowing I won’t take her advice. I haven’t deposited the check Mrs. Steele gave me and I don’t plan to, but I will do as she asked. I will convince Madden to go back home. I only know of one way to do that.
Break his heart.
Chapter Forty-Four
Madden
I hang out with Landon all of Friday, managing to talk him into taking the day off since I’m in town. We go horseback riding and clay shooting just like we did as teens. I know he’s trying to remind me of what I’m missing, but I know whether or not I’m in Hollis or Dallas, I still have my brothers. That’ll never change.
“Just call if you need me to save your ass again,” I joke as I start backing out of his drive.
“See you next time.”
I drive back to Hollis feeling better than I have since the wedding. I know I’m making the right decision choosing Jade. I don’t know why I even doubted it. I told Landon I liked her but I was wrong. I’m falling in love with her. It’s been slow. I didn’t even realize it was happening, but I’ve been on a free fall since the day we met. Maybe I’ve already fallen.
My phone chimes and I check the message the moment I stop at a red light. I don’t respond to Jade’s text telling me to come to her house. I know she has to be at work at seven, but I have plenty of time to get there before then. I need to tell her how I feel. Maybe then she’ll get out of the funk she’s been in.
When I pull up, she’s sitting on the porch in her Jack’s t-shirt. Her jeans are tucked into her cowboy boots. That’s my Jade. I rush out to her and pull her into a hug, but quickly realize she isn’t returning it.
“What’s wrong?” I ask and try to read the expression on her face. Her blue eyes are solemn. She isn’t smiling.
“We need to talk,” she says, softly.
“Yes, we do,” I interrupt. “I figured out something today–”
“I’m back with Brady,” her words rush out and I feel like I’ve been sucker-punched. “We’ve been talking awhile now, and I think he deserves a second chance.”
Her words keep repeating in my head. Over and over. She’s back with Brady. It occurs to me that I’m in love with her and she’s with someone else.
“You...and Brady?” I ask, disbelief in my voice. She slowly nods. “So this...” I motion between us, “meant nothing?”
“Madden,” she says and slips the necklace I gave her into the palm of my hand. “I should’ve told you sooner.”
“I thought it was no longer about making Brady jealous?” I yell. “Was that all just bullshit? Fuck this! Fuck you!”
I walk to my truck and I can hear Jade following behind me. My head is spinning with her confession, her weird mood suddenly making sense. She says my name again and I hesitate. Why, I have no idea.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but this was our plan from the beginning, right?”
“Right,” I agree. “Hope the two of you are happy together,” I say and slam the door, throwing her necklace onto the seat.
I back out of her driveway and don’t look back. I drive straight to Jack’s and pack my things, leaving my final month’s rent on the table as I walk out of my apartment for the last time. I don’t fucking look back.
I make it back to Dallas in record time. When Landon opens his door, he’s surprised to see me. The brunette hanging over his shoulder arches an eyebrow but doesn’t say a word.
“You were right. I belong here, brother.”
Chapter Forty-Five
Jade
My eyes are still puffy from crying when I go into work. I held it in until he was gone, but then I broke down, collapsing right there in my front yard. My heart is screaming at me that I’ve made a huge mistake and that I should call him and tell him it was all a lie. Tell him why I pushed him away.
But my head, the logical side of me, says it never would have worked. His parents are hell bent on keeping us apart. His father thinks I’m trash and his mother paid me off.
They want him to be with someone like Amelia. Someone who comes from a rich family with an impeccable upbringing. I grew up in a trailer park with a drug addict mother, have no idea who or where my father is, and barely have a high school education. Then, there’s that whole bit about me getting paid for sex. I highly doubt his parents will ever let that one go. It isn’t exactly a redeeming quality in a woman.
“I could kick your ass,” she says, rushing over and wrapping me in a hug. I manage a light laugh. “I won’t tell you again how big of a mistake you’re making.”
“Please don’t,” I beg.
“He left, Jade. He’s already packed his stuff and gone.”
I step back, wiping my tears. “See? He didn’t waste any time.”
“He had no reason to stay, did he? I mean, he believes you and Brady are back together.”
I sigh. “And now he can be happy. That’s all I want for him.”
“Yeah, that’s going to be really easy. The woman he loves is with someone else. Nothing like that to make you want to move on and be happy.”
“Okay, Casey, I get it. You think I made a mistake. I think I did the right thing. I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You’re right,” she says. “And if it makes you feel any better. I probably would’ve done the same thing. We’re both crazy like that.”
I smile and go behind the bar to get my apron. It’s a busy night, which helps keep my mind off of Madden. Of course, I check the stairs multiple times waiting on him to come down. I keep thinking I see him sitting at the end of the bar or laughing with the construction crew.
He isn’t here. He is gone.
That realization hits me like a ton of bricks, and I rush out from behind the bar, running up the steps to his empty apartment. The door is unlocked, so I push it open. The place is bare, the sheets even stripped from the mattress already.
I go sit down and then when the tears come, I lie down and cry, letting the mattress soak them up. It smells of him, so I breathe it in, desperate for anything that will make me feel close to him.
I didn’t know it would hurt this much. Didn’t know my entire body would ache from a broken heart.
The bed shifts and Casey crawls on with me, curling behind me. “You will get through this,” she whispers. “Because you are strong and beautiful, and you will persevere like you always have.”
“Thank you.”
Then, she adds, “And because I’m your best friend.”
I laugh at that. “We are pretty damn awesome, right?”
“You better fucking believe it.”
I’m shattered at that moment, but I’ll pick up the pieces because I have to. I refused to let Madden live with resentment and I refuse to let myself live with regret. I did the right thing. Even though it’s killing me.
Chapter Forty-Six
Madden
I s
tare at the computer screen and all the numbers seem to start running together. I loosen my tie and lean back in my chair. I’ve been back in Dallas almost a month. An entire month without Jade.
I still miss her.
I’d walked into Landon’s house and he hadn’t judged me when I’d gone to my knees. He hadn’t called me a pussy or told me to man up. He’d dropped to his knees and let me cry on his shoulder, the brunette he was with letting us have our moment. When I’d finished, we’d both stood and silently promised each other we wouldn’t say a word about that moment to anyone.
The following Monday morning I’d taken my rightful position at Steele Industries. I’d listened to the slight gloating in my father’s voice as he’d welcomed me home. Home. I don’t even know where that is anymore. Right now, it’s Landon’s guest room, much to my mother’s dismay.
I tap my pen on the desk and replay that last day with Jade in my head once again. It’s been on repeat since I left her. I’m back with Brady.
I never even saw it coming. She hadn’t mentioned him in weeks. She’d even told me it wasn’t about making him jealous anymore. Then, I’m gone for one night and they’re back together.
Fuck, I was even starting to think he was my friend. Getting along with him at work. Hanging out with him and the crew at Jack’s. How long had they been talking behind my back? Before the wedding? Fucking douche. I was blindsided yet again.
I slam the pen down and breathe out, still searching my brain for answers. Flashbacks of Jade come at me in quick succession. The first time we met. Our first kiss. Dancing at the street dance. Touching her. Her nervousness at meeting my family. Holding her while she slept. Giving her the necklace. Falling in love with her.
I was willing to give up everything for her. My money, my trust fund, the future that was planned out for me. I turned my back on it and she chose someone else. How the fuck did I not see that coming?
I glance back at the computer screen and shake my head. I hate this job. I felt more accomplished when I was working for King Construction. I felt like I was doing something then. Making a difference. I despise everything about sitting at this desk, wearing these clothes, crunching these numbers.