by D. M. Burns
I go and see Len at least three or four times a week now after school and on the weekends when my chores are caught up. Mostly we game it up on the PlayStation. She’s a badass at God of War and we battle it out.
Last night, she popped some popcorn and we watched TV until it was time for me to head out. I promised her that today we’d walk to town and grab some ice cream but I’m running late. It’s too dark for that but maybe we can go tomorrow. I brought her some fresh strawberries as a replacement for the ice cream. That girl is unique, and I feel oddly close to her in a way that’s familiar and safe. I gravitate to her. She’s funny, smart, and mine.
Len’s my girlfriend and has been since that kiss months ago at these very tracks. Or at least that’s how I see it. I’ve not said it out loud to her, but I figure its common knowledge by now, right? Do I need to ask her? Hell, I’m not sure. I’ve never had a girlfriend, only her.
When the guys at school started to give me shit months back, I did what I should’ve done the first time. I ended that smack talk quickly by knocking the shit out of the ringleader, Jackson Davis. When he called Len fire crotch, I snapped. Putting him on the ground in an unresponsive heap of dead weight, TKO. Making an example out of him for my brother and all to see, right then and there.
My actions scared Len though. That was the only thing that really bothered me about it all. Hearing her whisper my name and beg me not to fight while pulling on my arm play on repeat in my mind. But at the time, I was prepared to fight them all including Renegade.
I meant what I said to her. I wasn’t embarrassed by her, ever. I just prefer not to cause a scene, but Lena is worth it every day of the damn week. I promised her that I’d never hurt her feelings again. I’ll take that shit to my grave as well as anyone else that tries to cross me when it comes to her, period.
At first, I figured I’d have to at least beat the shit out of Jackson’s brother, Cash. But surprisingly, Cash simply shrugged his shoulders unaffected. The guy really does not give a damn about anything. If someone other than fam hit one of my brothers, it’d be a damn free for all. Brawling until the death but like I said, Cash is a cold unfeeling fucker. It’s sorta scary how much that guy doesn’t give a shit but whatever.
Renegade knows what Lena means to me so, he merely stood back surveying the situation with his hands on his hips and a smile on his face. Jackson was unmoving and I was done. I took Lena’s hand and walked away leaving them all there to do whatever the hell they wanted.
Ren’s had his hands full ever since he and Isabella made up. He really doesn’t give a shit about much else. I’m just glad that he dropped the bullshit about Len and focused his eyes and attention on Isabella.
Regardless of what my parents say, if it comes down to it, I have zero problems choosing Lena over Renegade. Something just tells me that she’s my person in this world. Ren’s probably getting ass from his chic anyway. Who’s knows?
Right now, I’ve only ever kissed Len. Sure, I’d like to do more but I’m in no hurry. My member downstairs is an eager guy though. But isn’t that the case with every adolescent asshole male my age? I have a feeling that her dad would gladly kill me.
I catch him eyeballing me like I’m a cryptic keepsake sent from the gates of hell to bring harm to his daughter. Watching me like a stalking hawk when I come over. Like he’s waiting for me to make one faulty move. I’d never push Len to do anything. I’ll gladly wait for her. Plus, I swore I’d never put Len in a bad headspace again, but he doesn’t know that. I get it though. That’s her dad and his job is to look out for his baby girl.
Summer’s almost over and this year Ren and I start high school. Rage and Rebel will be going with us too. Rebel got bumped up another grade level because of his super brain abilities and our cousin, Rage, just moved in with us. His mom recently passed in a car accident and since Rage’s dad was never in the picture, my parents took him in.
Leaving Len behind in middle school makes me feel a certain type of way, mainly aggravated, but there’s nothing that I can do to change it. Soon enough, she’ll be back by my side where she belongs. It’s just one school year though. We’ll adjust and it’s not like I won’t see her. I’ll go to her house and hang out as I do now. It’ll be fine.
As I round the corner of Len’s street, her house comes into view. She lives in a nice two-story ranch style home in a cool subdivision. It’s slightly dark outside but her parents don’t seem to mind me coming by to visit. I probably should’ve called but if I only get to see her for a little while then it’s cool. I’ll come back tomorrow bright and early.
When I cross over into her yard I come to a smoking halt. My arms feel like dead weight and my brain isn’t quite catching up with what I’m taking in. My eyes must be playing tricks on me. No fucking way… Is that?... Noooo, it can’t be.
Squinting my silver slots, I focus on the asshole making his way through Len’s bedroom window. It’s a slightly less appealing replica of me with longer hair, Renegade. That piece of shit. I let the bag of strawberries hit the ground.
My hands automatically ball up into tight fists at my sides and my jaw clenches up. I want to take off at a highspeed rate and clothesline his sorry ass. Knocking him out of this shit attempt to shimmy into Len’s bedroom then beat him unmercifully all over her backyard. My own damn brother, wow. I bow my head and deep breathe through my nostrils.
Looking off to the side, I try to regain control over my unsteady heartbeat. The anger that’s coating my body is starting to clog up any good judgment I might have. I feel like someone has punched me in the middle of my chest and kick my stomach for good measure. Why would Lena do this to me? It doesn’t make any sense.
If I wanted to be a dick, I’d simply go to the front door and knock. Once Len’s parents answer the door, I’d out both of their ass’s and stand back watching the fuckery play out with a smirk on my face. But I’m a firm believer in what goes around comes around. They deserve each other.
My mind bounces over to Renegade. That’s my twin. MY BROTHER. The one who’s supposed to look out for me. Yeah, right. He’s taking care of me alright. Or should I say, he’s taking care of his dick?
Spinning around, I head back home because if I don’t, I’m likely to kill him. And Lena… Well, screw her or better yet, Renegade can and probably is.
I’m done with Len.
I’m done with Ren.
I’m done with all this shit.
I’m just fucking done.
Hold on, I bet Isabella needs some company considering Renegade’s occupied with Lena. One wrong doesn’t make a right, but it sure as hell feels like it will right about now. Fuck them both.
Aggressive Anger Boiling Over.
My Calculated Composure Turning Chaos.
Engulfing My Future In Fiery Flames.
chapter 10 - lena
It’s been two weeks since I slipped out of Rampage’s private lounge while his back was turned, literally. I’ve managed to avoid him for the most part and I was secretly high fiving myself until Jules informed me that he was in New York on business. All the self-esteem I had built up over my evade and elude efforts went right down the drain. If Ramp wants you, you can bet your sweet ass he’ll find you.
I’m not ashamed of kissing him, no. I also have zero problems admitting that Rampage is incredibly sexy cause he damn well is. But what I am having an issue with is acknowledging that I want more, so much more-always have. Things that he will never give me. If I keep moving down this destructive path, I know without a doubt, wholeheartedly, Rampage will hurt me all over again.
Except this time if I play along it’ll leave fatal damage, demolition style. The middle school girl living inside of me wants desperately to believe that there is more to him. But the grown woman who has watched for years with eyes wide open as his life played out through social media, certainly knows better.
That was a stupid move on my part showing up at that party anyway. I knew better but I wanted to socialize, meet some new
people. Plus, it gave me an insider’s view of what takes place and that was essential. One step closer to my ultimate goal.
When I ran into Trace out in the main hallway before making an appearance, I didn’t think nothing about walking into that ballroom with him but apparently, Rampage did. And all of that backfired and lodged in my throat when I saw Rampage closing in on me out of the corner of my eye. Dear sweet baby Jesus did it ever.
First and foremost, Ramp resembled walking, stalking sin. I couldn’t decide whether to run and hide or get down on my hands and knees crawling the rest of the way to him. Yeah-he looked that damn good.
Sadly, that creepy Crellan guy had a hold of my hand. Don’t get me wrong, he was yum. Like I think I might wanna lick your lollipop kinda sexy. It was just a nasty fleeting thought though, maybe two thoughts but who’s counting.
Honestly, that guy was a dirty-dirty version of Zac Efron, just taller with morbidly dead eyes. It was an unsettling sight to take in. Sorta, like there was a hidden death toll taking place behind his glass covers. But I’ve done my research and I’m well aware of Mr. Haze.
Anyway, I stayed rooted firmly to the spot. It felt weirdly similar to one of those scenes in slow motion on Animal Kingdom gone wild or whatever. You know what I’m talking about. Where the lion prowls for its unsuspecting prey, slinking stealthily through the bushes unnoticed. Then when you least expect it, you have a Lion King Zimba appear sinking his razor-sharp fangs into your ass, flinging you all about like a last meal, and leaving nothing but a bloody aftermath.
Rampage’s entire blacked-out tux attire short-circuited my good frame of mind. His hair was slicked back, and those grey eyes stood out like laser beams burning through to my soul. He was flawless from head to toe. Like I’ve said before, Satan in custom-made attire.
My body was shaking from the inside out with quakes that rattled my teeth as he led me to his lounge. Any other time I would’ve popped off at the mouth with something snarky but that was not the time. He was furious and barely containing his calm, cool, calculated composure. I silently wondered if he knew about my little secret but there’s no way.
With every zip line back and forth path he paced in his lounge the more I feared his up and coming response would detonate the palace. Leveling the walls around us leaving nothing but a pile of rubble and smoke.
As he raked his hand through those glorious gleaming strands of hair, I knew. If his actions before weren’t a dead giveaway, that was the indicator I needed that shit was real for him. I’m just not sure what the hell the big deal was, still don’t have a clue. He was on edge and I’ve never quite seen him like that before, ever.
Yeah, okay… Maybe the Trace thing was a bad idea on my part but at the time it was really innocent. Now that I’ve had time to reflect, I can see why he’d get his billionaire boxer briefs in a bunch. Because if I saw him with someone else in real life that would sting for me a little as well. Okay, maybe a whole lot. But it was more than that, so much more.
It had everything to do with that Crellan guy. I’m not sure what was going on between those two, but you could smell the testosterone in the air. The only thing left for them to do was to whip their dicks out and see who could piss first. The way Ramp pulled me into his body was an upfront, in your face, middle finger out, fuck you to that guy. Rampage was just reluctant to disclose those details with me.
No matter what, he’ll always be my first to many things. Seeing his stunts throughout the years shouldn’t have bothered me but it was like multiple tiny puncture wounds to the heart. Which makes zero sense, he was never really mine. So, I assume it’s kinda the same for him, right-maybe? I’ve made great progress over the years though and I hid it really well, until that kiss.
When Rampage kissed me, I felt that in every cell of my body. From my toes to my fingertips. Liquid lava flooded my system and melted away any rebuttal my mind could have spun out there. I was centered on the feel of him only.
Those tingles erupted in my stomach sending out an SOS to my VA-JJ. That girl down south was standing there with her backpack on the ready for an adventure to seek out a yeti. Claiming his beastly business ass once and for all. Finally slapping a stake in the unchartered territory after all these years was her main goal.
In essence, I was screwed if I didn’t get out of there, literally. So, when Ramp’s phone rang saving the yeti humping day, I quietly slipped through the door, and quickly got my ass out of Aces Down. The last thing I need in my life right now is the added drama of banging my boss that coincidentally happens to be my schoolgirl crush that already had a successful go at breaking my heart. Plus, I have other objectives at stake here.
I really need to get one of those best friend things that everyone talks so much about because I’m sure if I had one, they’d be compelled to knock the shit out of me right now. It’s in the girl-code handbook. And I’d let them too. Maybe the jolt would jiggle some common sense back into place.
“Hey, Lena. Why are you still here?” I look up to see Jules leaning into the door frame of my office.
“Just trying to track the materials needed for the main lobby. I wanted to nail down a date for the crew I’ve hired for the job.” I shrug my shoulders and give her a half-smile.
“Well, enough of that. I’m going to La Veiner to have dinner. It’s the club’s restaurant and their steaks are to die for. Come go with me.” She uses her arm to encourage me over and I shut my computer down. I guess this is God’s way of giving me that friendship thing I’ve been bitching about. Thanks, Big G!
“This place is gorgeous,” I whisper to Jules as we’re being led to our seats.
The three-sixty wall to window view displays a spectacular skyline view of the night's twinkling star studding scene. Vibrant white walls with exposed red-oak stained ceiling beams are the perfect combinations of classy meets sleek. The tables are covered with crisp white cloth linens with a golden crackled glass candle globe centering each table. The added décor illuminates out a fair amount of the romantic vibes.
There’s a waterfall that divides this luxury dining spot into two sections and is barely noticeable to the ears. The background noise is just enough to heighten the dining experience. It stands as the restaurant's eye-catching center attraction running off into a mass circular pond that gathers at the entrance of La Veiner. The stone red river rocks that layer the entrance hall waterfall proudly displays Aces Downs logo. It’s captivating much like the building's structure as a whole.
“I can see why Rampage told me to leave this place alone, it’s perfect,” I whisper out in awe as I peer up at the grand crystal chandelier. Jesus, he really held back no expense.
“Yeah. He loves this restaurant, his personal lounge, and his office. Those are the three places he wants no changes. He’d literally lose his shit if so.” Jules says as we follow the hostess to our seats.
“Thank you,” I say to the polite waiter at our tableside as we cozy into our seats.
“I called ahead and gave my order,” Jules says.
“Steak, right?” I look to Jules and she nods.
“I’ll have the same, well done,” I say to the waitress and she nods then off she goes.
“So, tell me girly, who are ya dating?” Jules dives right in. That’s what I love about this girl, she’s not afraid to cut the shit.
“Well, no one right now but I'm open to suggestions.” I wiggle my eyebrows at her and she acts like she’s scouring her mind's filing cabinet.
“I’ve got some possibilities, maybe. What’s your type though?” She makes a popping noise with her lips and smirks. Her purple hair is highlighted by the candlelight and it reminds me of a glowing purple Easter egg.
“Uhm, I’ve got a nasty habit of thinking I can make the elusive bad boys decide to be good.” I shrug my shoulders. Case in point, look at Rampage but I don’t bother to say that out loud.
“What about you? Anyone special?” I ask.
“Girl, I don’t have time for that. Plus, I’m
not ready to pick just one. I like a variety. I think it really depends on what mood I’m in with which one I decide to spend time with, ya know? Sorta, like picking out heels with a suit. Whatever matches, really.” She giggles.
“I get it,” I say and nod my head even though I really don’t get it at all. I’m not judging her; I’m simply judging myself. I have no clue how to flip between men because I’ve never managed multiples. I’m a steady one-woman man type of chick.
“No, you don’t. You’re not that kinda lady.” She shakes her head back and forth. I can’t stop the giggle that bursts forth.
“Yeah, true but it sounds interesting,” I say. She wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and nods yes. This one right here is probably helluva fun to get drunk with. Jules is a live wire of energy. “Hey, next time be sure to share the info with me for all closed events, please. I showed up at the Royal Diamond Club party.” I shake my head as her mouth forms a big silent O.
“Shit, I just assumed you knew. I’m so sorry, Lena. But really that’s the only event held by Mr. Carter that employees are not allowed to attend.” She leans forward and sets her elbows on the table then whispers, “Was he pissed or bad-mad pissed?”
“Billionaire boy jockey crammed up the ass pissed.” I rub my palm across my forehead. “But I told him that I wasn’t aware that it was a closed invitation only.” I shrug and she gives me a sympathetic smile.
When I’m done with my steak, I push the plate back and rub at my protruding tummy. The food here is legendary as far as my belly is concerned because of that steak alone. The entire dinner was awesome, and my time spent with Jules just made it that much more enjoyable.
“Okay, girl. I’m gonna need you to tell me the deal with you and Mr. Carter. Spill it.” She points her boney finger at me then locks onto her purple hair twirling it around her digit. Oh, hell no. I don’t think so. We're nowhere near that girlfriend level of close.