Insignificant

by Graveyard Greg

me to move to the college dorm, Raffe insisted he help me move, and I didn’t object. He and I had our ups and downs over the years, but there was one thing I was absolutely certain of: I was his best friend, and he was mine. However, that also meant we could read each other like a book most of the time. “Not many giraffes go to this college,” Raffe said while he was driving, his eyes on the road. Yet I knew he was watching me with his peripheral vision.

  “Yeah,” I said, not even bothering to try and lie to him. It wouldn’t have worked anyway, as we were experts at sniffing out that kind of stuff.

  “What if I decided to go to your college?”

  “By the time you graduate, I’ll be an old man.”

  Raffe snorted. “My grades aren’t that bad, big bro.”

  “That’s because I tutored you in Algebra, Squirt.”

  “True,” Raffe said, smiling. “Did I ever say thanks for you tutoring me?”

  “You sure did, why you asking?”

  “I’m glad you didn’t tutor me in English, or I’d have flunked.”

  “Oh, I’m so sorry,” I said, my voice dripping with mock sarcasm. “Why are you asking?”

  “Because I don’t ever want you to ever feel or think that I’ve outgrown you.” He placed a hand on my leg, squeezing it lightly. “Yeah, sure I’m bigger than you, but you made me the man I am today.”

  “You were a good kid,” I said, patting the back of Raffe’s hand before he returned it to the steering wheel.

  “It’s going to blow, flying back home.”

  I knew what he was talking about, and nodded. “One disadvantage of being so big, which is something I don’t envy you for: the lack of legroom.”

  “Next time you see me over winter break, I’ll have my driver’s license.”

  “Yup. Pedestrians beware.”

  “Funny, big bro. It just seems like we're getting old faster and faster.”

  “It does seem like yesterday you came into the garage wanting to work out with me,” I said, thinking back to why he wanted to lift weights: to be as strong as his big brother. He certainly succeeded beyond even my expectations!

  “Those were the best days of my life, Gir.”

  “Mine too, even if you did outclass me.”

  “You trained me well, big bro.”

  I nodded in agreement again. “So we keep reminding ourselves. You’re going to keep on working out while I’m in college?”

  “Sure will, and how about you?”

  “You know it, Squirt.”

  I definitely kept that promise; as a matter of fact, I hit the weights extra hard because without Raffe, I had no one to challenge me except for my own limits. My determination paid off over the following months, as I made some huge gains in strength and muscle mass. I decided powerlifting was the way to go for me, and I was gaining a very solid belly that could take a lot of punches. I was also doing great in college, and I even started dating a cute zebra girl. All in all, I was happy with my life in college, but I always looked forward to my visits at home. Raffe was getting a little bit bigger every time I saw him, but it bother me as much until his senior year.

  I came home early one day to surprise the folks and Raffe; as I pulled my car into the driveway I shut off the engine and took a moment to relax. The sight of the family home in front of me brought back memories, most of them good and a lot of them excellent. My trip down memory lane lasted for a couple more minutes before the front door opened, and out of the house came Raffe.

  “Big bro! You’re home early!” he said as I got out of the car, giving me a feeling of déjà vu as I wondered what was different about him. I quickly found out once he got close enough to hug, and where he had to crouch down to do it. Apparently another growth spurt had hit him, and this one was a doozy. I was now eye level to about his mid thigh, which was wider than my shoulders. Hell, even his calf muscles were larger than my thighs! When he hugged me, his arms felt like they were made of steel wrapped in fur. I felt like a kid being hugged by this giant of “giraffian” proportions, and it was a feeling I did not enjoy. When he finally released me he looked down at me, still taller than me by a couple of feet even though he was crouching. I saw the same expression in his eyes that he always had ever since he was smaller than me: adoration. It didn’t stop the feelings of inadequacy, but it helped.

  “Another growth spurt, huh?” I said, wanting to at the very least acknowledge it.

  Raffe nodded, shyly, maybe even a bit uncomfortable. “Yeah.”

  “How come you didn’t tell me?” I knew why he didn’t, but I wanted to hear the answer from his lips.

  “Well… to be honest? I just didn’t think to tell you.” He said, rubbing the back of his head, looking sheepish. I’d almost have thought it was a cute look for him, had it not been for the fact his biceps were almost as big as his head.

  “It’s okay, Squirt,” I said, feeling that his nickname was our version of calling a big man “Tiny”, which was how I felt at that very moment. “You look great; you really grew into that size. So how tall are you?”

  “Eighteen feet.”

  “Wow. That’s pretty impressive. Are your grades in school just as impressive?”

  “Yeah, I’m getting all A’s this semester, and before you ask today’s a snow day, which is why I’m home. I wouldn’t dare skip school.”

  I chuckled at Raffe’s defensiveness. “I was wondering about that, but I wouldn’t ever think you’d play hooky.”

  “You’d be disappointed in me if I did,” Raffe said, “and I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I ever did that to you, big bro.” He then glanced over at the garage, and then grinned down at me. “Want to work out? I can’t wait to see how strong you are. You’re looking bigger than ever.”

  I couldn’t help but smile at my little brother’s enthusiasm. He was just a kid at heart; a very BIG kid. “Maybe later, Raffe. I’m kind of tired after that long drive.”

  “Oh yeah, sorry; I forgot about how long that drive is. We’ve got your room just like you left it, except I cleaned it up.”

  “Pretty brave of you, Squirt.”

  “You can reward me with ice cream later,” Raffe said. “You get some rest, and I’ll take your suitcase inside the house.”

  I couldn’t argue with the suggestion of rest. “All right, but be careful with my stuff, Squirt.”

  Raffe rolled his eyes at me. “I haven’t been careless with your stuff since I was ten, dude, and I didn’t know my own strength back then.”

  “I’ll always mourn the loss of my favorite baseball.” One day we were playing catch, and Raffe threw the ball too high and too hard, a wild throw that arced high into the woods behind our backyard. We never did find the ball, so I’d occasionally use that fact to pick on Raffe.

  “Go on inside before you make my cry, you bully,” Raffe said, still crouching in front of me. “Want me to wake you up in an hour?”

  “That be great,” I said, stifling a yawn. “See you then, Squirt.” I went inside the house, glancing up at the two story ceiling. I wondered what it looked like from Raffe’s perspective, but I stopped that line of thought quickly. I wasn’t ruining my visit home with a jealous streak. Not when I could ruin it with a bad lapse of mixed signals.

  It all started after Raffe woke me up as promised, and I found he already had lunch ready for us. He didn’t eat much, which I found very odd, as he’d usually eat more than me. “You okay, Raffe?”

  “Yeah, I’m just not very hungry,” he said, staring at the food on his plate.

  “You should eat, Squirt. Otherwise you’ll lose your big muscles and be a skinny tree instead of a mountain.”

  Raffe chuckled slightly. “I’m just not hungry,” he said, taking his plate and wrapping it with plastic wrap before placing it in the refrigerator. “I’ll save it for later, I promise.”

  I’d have to have been pretty blind not to notice something was bothering Raffe, as he wasn’t the type to lose his appetite. “What’s bugging you, Raffe?”<
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  Raffe stared at me for a second, but he glanced away, unable to hold his gaze. “I don’t want to talk about it,” he said, a sullen look darkening his features.

  “Okay, but you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

  Raffe nodded after a moment’s hesitation, as if he wasn’t sure if he could. “Let’s go work out,” he said, “maybe that’ll give me an appetite.”

  Now it was my turn to hesitate—did I actually want to see how strong he was after the latest growth spurt? He could probably curl a couple tons with just one arm, while I was lucky to do a quarter of that kind of weight. I was about to make an excuse not to lift weights with him, but there was something in his expression that suggested it wasn’t his lack of appetite that was bothering him. “Maybe it will,” I said, “but can you tolerate those light weights?”

  Raffe smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I got a brand new set of weights, so it’s not a problem,” he said as we walked into the garage. There had been some changes to the place since Raffe and I started working out. The floor was reinforced with interlocking rubber mats, more plates had been added to the extended racks, but the newest addition to the room was a weight bench scaled to Raffe’s size, which dwarfed the old bench we used. The difference in size was a blatant reminder of how much things had changed, as if the fact Raffe’s legs were longer than I was tall wasn’t enough. “Nice weight set there,” I said as I put some plates on the bars, ready to work out my arms. Holding a barbell in each hand, I held them up along