“Whatever you say Mr President.” I rolled my eyes and put a hand out to move the vase a half inch to the left.
“Fuck you, Amy, I’ve tried to tell you, I begged you to listen to me five years ago, and I’ve barely moved on with my life thinking one day you might actually wake up and realise you’re wrong, which makes me fucking pathetic because if you’d cared about our marriage as much as I did, you’d have talked to me. No matter what you thought you’d seen, you’d have asked me and tried to work through it, but no, you didn’t give a shit and took everything at face value and that hurt as much as you fucking leaving. You didn’t love me enough to even talk. So, you know what Amy, that’s it. No more. You don’t believe me, will never believe me, and its time I started living the life I should have been for the last five years. And one more thing,” he said, curling his lip and giving me a look full of disdain. “Next time you fancy a show, go on a ladies’ night, because I’m not yours to watch anymore.”
As Elijah turned to leave, I felt a stabbing pain in my breast bone and got the bitter, watery feeling of imminent vomit and placing a hand over my mouth, I watched as he walk slowly through the door, slamming it behind him. I startled as it banged and then when I heard his truck start, I allowed the tears to fall.
Elijah
aged 28
As Mia moved over me, dropping kisses down my chest, I let out a moan. My dick was hard and every inch of my skin felt sensitive.
“Mia,” I whispered. “Shit, babe.”
“Is that nice?” she asked, giving me a little smirk.
“Nice isn’t the word,” I gasped, arching my back.
“Good. You seemed tense tonight, so I hope I’m helping you relax.”
And boom! My hard on deflated like a fucking two week old balloon. She’d reminded me that before she’d turned up at my house, I’d been festering over my argument with Amy. Damn Amy and those fucking flowers and the fact that seeing her bin them made me feel like I’d swallowed a tennis ball and it’d got stuck right in the middle of my heart – it was her throwing our marriage away, all over again. The feelings one vase of flowers had evoked in me over the last couple of days was pathetic. I was pathetic. Since I’d seen them the day before, my head had been full of memories and I’d spent hours the night before looking at old photographs. Photographs of happier times when Amy had been mine and I’d been hers. As for how I’d reacted earlier, when she’d been about to ditch them, I wished I could redo that ten minutes of insanity, because no fucking way did I want her to see how much she was still hurting me, after all these years.
“Hey, you okay?” Mia asked. “You’ve gone somewhere else.”
She dropped a sweet kiss to the end of my nose and ran a cool palm down my cheek. I shook my head and tried to shift up the bed.
“Sorry, babe. I’m knackered, it’s been a long day.”
“You need a massage?”
“No.” My voice was a little louder than I’d meant. “Sorry, no. I might just get an early night.”
I had no idea why I’d turned down a massage from my girlfriend – maybe because I’m a stupid prick and that used to be Amy’s thing. After a long day gardening, she’d straddle my back, and with her long fingers ease my tense, overworked muscles. It usually led to sex, because that was what Amy did to me whenever she put her hands onto me – made me needy as hell to be inside of her.
“Oh, okay,” Mia said, looking a little dejected. “I’ll get off home.”
The way her shoulders slumped and her eyes dropped to examine her fingers made me feel like shit. She was gorgeous and sweet and I had just treated her like she didn’t matter, when she did. She mattered to me a lot, I just needed to remember that a little more often.
“Why don’t you stay over,” I suggested.
A light came in her eyes. “You sure?”
“Yeah of course,” I replied, running my fingers through her shoulder length hair. “Can’t say I’ll be much company, but as long as you don’t mind that I might fall asleep on you.”
“No, of course not. We don’t have plans tomorrow, so maybe you can make up for it with a long lie in bed in the morning.” She giggled and poked at my bare chest.
“Yeah,” I said, forcing what I hoped looked like a genuine smile. “You know it.”
Mia kissed me gently and I tried hard to wipe my mind of anything else other than her lips, but cinnamon-red hair and hazel eyes kept invading my thoughts. As Mia settled against me, her head tucked under my chin, I looked up at the ceiling, willing the images to go away.
* * *
Mia was in the shower while I made us a late breakfast. I’d been horny enough and relaxed enough to have sex with her when we woke, without a single thought of Amy. It was only after I’d slipped back into bed, after disposing of the condom, and Mia had distractedly traced the tattoo over my heart, that Amy reappeared as the invisible third person in the room.
Waiting for the kettle to boil, I ran a hand down my face and groaned. What the fuck was I going to do? My ex-wife was pushing her way back inside my head and I’d been doing so damn well for the last few months. I’d met Mia, I was letting go of the pain and anger twisting my gut and could actually say her name without feeling as though I was having a heart attack. But two fucking weeks of her being back in my life and I was back to being a damn basket case.
Blowing out a breath, I was pulling a couple of mugs from the cupboard when I heard a knock at the door. I glanced at the clock on the cooker, wondering who would be visiting at eleven on a Saturday morning and realised there’d only be one person; my brother, Sam.
“Morning,” he said brightly as I stood back to let him in. “You look like shit.”
“Cheers,” I replied, glancing in the hall mirror. He had a point. Considering I’d had some good morning sex, my eyes were dull and my lips turned down. Plus, I was dressed a little bit like a serial killer who hid the bodies in the walls of his house – I was wearing pyjama bottoms, an old and faded The Jam t-shirt, which had been my dad’s, and a ratty old cardigan that I think my Grandad had left after a family get together once. Okay, it was weird that I wore the cast offs of my family members, particularly as my grandad was dead, but it was that kind of morning.
“Does Nanna know you still have Grandad’s cardi’?” Sam asked, moving into the lounge.
“No idea,” I replied, following him and shaking my head as he bounced down onto the sofa and propped his feet on the arm.
“Get your fucking feet off my furniture.” I knocked them off and flopped down onto the chair opposite to him. “Mia’s here by the way.”
I felt like shit that I needed to tell him, but Sam, like Lucas, thought Mia was not for me and I didn’t want her walking in on him bad mouthing her. My brother knew me better than anyone and thought it was his right to tell me how I hadn’t got over Amy. Not that he was particularly team Amy, he simply didn’t think I was being fair to Mia, or myself.
“And you’re still dressed like that?” Putting his feet back on the sofa, he let out an empty laugh. “Hah, she must fucking love you.”
I chose not to answer, because I knew if I did and admitted that yes, Mia did love me, I’d get the usual lecture from him, even if Mia was in the house.
“So what’ve you been up to?” I asked.
“Not much. Took Hannah Brown out last night.”
“And?” I asked, wiggling my brows, knowing how long he’d been desperate to get her out on a date.
Sam shrugged and reached for the TV remote from the floor. “Not what I expected.”
“What, not as good? Shit Sam, that must be crap. You’ve had a hard on for her for years.”
“That’s the breaks, bro,” he sighed, holding out the remote with one hand and rubbing his breast bone with the other. “She’s a bit boring if I’m honest. Talked about her fucking dog, Baby, all night.”
“Her dog’s called Baby?”
“Yeah, weird right? Anyway, I don’t think I was what she was looking for either.”
/> “How come?”
I looked at him perplexed, my brother never had a problem getting women to fall in love with him. A lot of people actually took us for twins, we were so alike on first glance, but if you studied us carefully, you’d see Sam’s nose was slightly wider and at two years older than me, he’d always been taller and broader. I’d almost caught him up on the height, but he still had an inch on my six feet two inches. He was naturally broad and muscular, and with his olive skin, which he got from our mum’s Greek heritage, and dark hair and designer stubble, he was a prime target for most women. The fact that he owned a successful employment agency didn’t hurt matters either. This was why I was surprised that Hannah wasn’t already introducing him to her family.
“She wants a man who is ready to settle down, and that’s not me,” Sam replied, flicking onto the sport channel.
I rolled my eyes. Sam was adamant he was not settling down – ever.
“You’ll need to one day,” I said.
“No I won’t. You tell me one relationship that you know of that’s worked out.” His eyes remained on the TV.
“Mum and Dad.”
He turned to look at me and frowned. “Yeah because they have separate bedrooms and Mum’s always out supporting the latest lost cause. You know she’s gone on an anti-fracking demo this weekend?”
“Yeah, I know. Anyway, it doesn’t matter why it works, it works.”
“They may be the exception to the rule then,” he replied, tapping the remote against his thigh. “I mean look at you and Amy. Meant to be together, adored the fuck out of each other, and you shagged like damn rabbits almost every bloody day, and I know because I fucking heard you and you still split up.” Sam glanced at me and winced. “Sorry bro, but you know it’s true.”
“We split up because Lauren fucking Proctor was obsessed with me and Amy didn’t care enough.”
“She fucking cared,” he scoffed. “But you and I know Lauren Proctor had been getting into Amy’s head since you first met. I mean, you took her on a date before you took Amy.”
“I didn’t, it was a group thing.”
Sam waved the remote in the air. “Whatever, it doesn’t matter. What does matter is that Amy had issues with Lauren and finding her naked, on top of you didn’t help matters.”
I let out a sigh. “If you, my own brother, doesn’t fucking believe me, I never had any chance of getting Amy to, did I?”
“I believe you,” Sam cried, his eyes narrowing on me. “I just think you were a fucking dick to get yourself into such a position when you knew how she felt about you.”
“It was a party, we were all pissed.”
“Maybe, but you were obviously more pissed than most and that my dear bro was a big fucking mistake. As soon as that demon woman walked through the door, you should have been on your guard and playing beer pong with Alex and Lucas, like you’re three fucking dickwad, American frat boys was not being on your guard. I also blame Amy, because she should have taken you home instead of putting you in Alex’s spare room. Plus,” he said with a resigned nod of his head, “she should have believed you.”
“Well thanks for that at least.” I gave a short laugh as Sam turned back to the TV.
“You’re a stupid prick at times, but you’re not a cheat, Eli. Anyway, where’s the lovely Mia now?”
“Taking a shower.”
“Washing you off herself I assume.” He turned to grin at me and wiggled his brows. “Can’t beat a bit of lazy morning sex.”
I didn’t answer, but just smiled. He was right, you couldn’t, but while I’d enjoyed sex with Mia, there’d been something missing, but I had no damn idea what it was.
“She stay over a lot?” Sam asked.
“A couple of nights a week, usually at the weekend.”
“You stay there?”
“Not often, she’s got a flatmate who smells like farts because of the bloody awful vegetarian curries that she insists on eating for almost every meal.”
“Maybe Mia should move in here.” He looked at me with a smirk that said everything about the shit stirring dick he was at times.
“Yeah maybe,” I replied, calling his bluff to shut his antics down. “I think Mia moving in here would be a great idea.”
“Oh my God, really?”
Sam bolted upright and I gripped the arm of the chair, as Mia walked in, freshly showered and grinning from ear to ear.
“Oh baby,” she cried. “That’s the best idea ever.”
Amy
aged 20
“Do you like it?” Elijah asked expectantly. “I know it’s small, but the location is perfect - halfway between your uni’ and my college, and the rent is reasonable.”
I looked around the apartment, with its huge arched windows overlooking fields and the canal, and grinned.
“I love it,” I almost squealed. “But are you sure we can we afford it?”
“With my gardening jobs and your shifts at the restaurant, we’ll be fine.” Elijah’s eyes were pleading with me. “We need this Amy. I fucking miss you so much and at least this way we get to spend every night together.”
He was right, we’d barely seen each other when we first started our interior design and landscaping courses, but in our final year, work had ramped up and we were lucky if we spent a night together each week and because I worked in a restaurant, we usually only got to spend Saturday night together at the weekend. It was our busiest night for diners, but I was more than happy to give up the huge Saturday night tips to someone else so that I could have time with Elijah.
“Plus,” he said, pulling on my hand. “Sam is going to take the second bedroom, so we’ll just split the rent three ways.”
“He is?” Even though I loved Sam, I felt a little deflated that this wasn’t going to be mine and Elijah’s little oasis away from everyone else, but it made sense having him, someone, live with us.
“He’ll hardly be here anyway. He works until eight most nights and weekends he’s always out.”
It was true, Sam was putting in long hours at the employment agency where he’d worked for the last three years. He wanted to learn everything there was to learn, so that maybe one day he could buy it from Hazel, his boss. She was in her late fifties and didn’t hide the fact that she was ready to retire and with no children to leave it to, Sam was the ideal person to takeover.
I looked through to the kitchen which was separated from the lounge by the breakfast bar. It would be lovely to be able to cook for us both without having to check Mum didn’t need the kitchen, or worry that Dad and Matty were going to barge in in the middle of us eating and start talking to Elijah about football.
“We get the bedroom with the en suite?” I asked.
Elijah nodded enthusiastically – hopefully.
“Okay,” I finally said. “Let’s do it.”
The next thing I knew, I was being dragged into Elijah’s arms and lifted from my feet. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I leaned in and kissed him.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” I asked.
“So fucking ready you wouldn’t believe.”
With one hand on my bum and the other stroking my thigh, he carried me over to the breakfast bar and sat me on it, pulling me to the edge with my legs still tight around him. Lifting up my t-shirt, Elijah placed a warm hand on the small of my back, while his other cupped my cheek.
“This is what I’ve wanted for so long, Amy,” he whispered, his chocolate coloured irises darkening to almost black as he stared at me intently. “To have a home with you. To know that when I get into bed every night, you’re going to be there.”
I rolled my eyes and giggled.
“Not just for the sex,” Elijah groaned, tickling my side. “Although, not having to be quiet or grab a quickie while no one is home will be pretty epic.”
“Hmm,” I said, grinning. “It will have its plus points.”
“There’ll be lots of plus points. I’m not saying we won’t argue over me leaving my
shoes around, or you not getting rid of your used make-up wipes, because we probably will, in fact we’ll argue about loads of stuff, but we’ll be really happy too. I just know we will.”
“You do?”
I gave a contented sigh as I traced a finger down Elijah’s nose, feeling the little bump that’d he’d apparently had since the age of six, and then followed the outline of his lips which puckered and kissed my fingertip.
“Yeah,” Elijah replied. “And I know because I can’t imagine being happy without you. Ever.”
“Well, I doubt you’ll have to find out, as long as you want me, I’m all yours.”
Breathing deeply, Elijah took my mouth with his and kissed me – telling me without words that I’d always belong to him. His tongue brushed against mine and his hand against the small of my back pushed me closer to his warm, hard body. We kissed, desperately trying to convey all that we felt for each other, which was too overwhelming to express with words. It was everything.
“This is it Amy,” Elijah whispered, as we slowly parted. “The beginning of our life together and it’s going to be amazing.”
Amy
aged 28
Elijah and I had been doing the dance of avoidance over the last few days, and if we’d been on Strictly, I’m pretty sure we’d have got all tens. I only had to hear the deep growl of his voice to find myself something to do on the other side of the house. The thought of seeing him after what had been said was too painful to think about. It had also got me to thinking that maybe I had given up on our marriage far too easily. Maybe I should have talked to him before running home, packing a bag, and going to stay with Rachel for two weeks before I organised myself somewhere to live in London.
Yeah, now I thought about it I’d been hasty and stupid, but I was in an emotional state and visions of Lauren riding Elijah were simply too much for me to cope with. Everyone told me to talk to him. Adam, Rachel’s now husband but boyfriend at the time, said that Elijah was so adamant that he was innocent that he had to be telling the truth, especially as I’d caught them.
Elijah: The Cooper Brothers Page 7