by Jerilee Kaye
“And we know he will,” the man continued. “My son is a man of his word. He made you and your father a promise and he will keep it. I know because he’s my son. This family is more important to him than anything else. He’ll go through with this wedding.”
“It’s not like we chose badly. This girl comes from a very good family. Decent. Wealthy.”
“And has a set of beautiful genes to give us absolutely stunning babies,” the man added jokingly.
“I won’t forgive him if he defies us, Jac,” the woman breathed. “He can’t back out on his word now. I will… disinherit him!”
The man just laughed. “Now, now. Don’t be so stressed out, sweetheart.”
The woman paused and Adrienne heard her laugh. “Your son has given me more wrinkles than I want!”
The man laughed again. “No, honey. You’re very beautiful. You’re a fox!”
The elevator opened on the ground floor. Adrienne stood still as the couple walked past her.
Every nerve in her body screamed. Every muscle shook. She was certain that her face had turned white, bloodless. Her heart pounded loudly inside her ribcage. She couldn’t breathe.
Realization crept through her, took control of her body and threatened to suffocate her.
She remembered the many times when Justin would fall silent and sad when he talked about his family and his obligations to them. That was it. That was what his parents asked him to do.
Her heart shattered into a million pieces. She walked out of the elevator like a zombie. Her tears threatened to blind her. She didn’t hear anything, didn’t see anything. Only one thought dominated her mind and she couldn’t escape the blinding pain that came with it.
Justin is engaged.
22. Agwat
Filipino for Space / Distance
When Adrienne arrived at Yuan’s apartment, her friends knew instantly that something was wrong.
“What?” Yuan asked. “Did he break your heart? Was he cheating on you? Where is he? I will kill him!”
Adrienne sat on the couch silently. She stared into space, still unable to recover from her shock. How could this happen to her? A few hours ago, she was happy. She was floating on air.
But that seemed so far away as she sat with her heart broken like shattered glass. She didn’t know how she would be able to recover from it. Her world had fallen apart.
“Adrienne, what is wrong?” Jill asked, taking her hands in hers and gently squeezing them.
She stared at them for a long time.
“Please don’t tell me you caught him cheating on you?”
Adrienne shook her head. “He wasn’t cheating on me.”
“Then why are you like this?”
She took a deep breath. “Apparently… Justin was sort of… cheating with me.”
“What?”
“I…” She took a deep breath. “I shared the elevator with his parents. They didn’t know me. They haven’t met me. But his Mom was so upset, she couldn’t help talking about her…dilemma with her son.” Pain came rushing to her again. “She said…that Justin has this obligation to the family. An arrangement that goes way back when he was still very young.”
“What is it?”
“They… arranged for him… to be married to some… rich heiress,” she stammered and then tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Oh my God!” Yuan and Jill breathed together.
It took a moment for her friends to recover.
“Maybe…maybe it’s not his parents. How could you know? You haven’t met them.”
“I saw a picture of them,” Adrienne replied. “And his father looks exactly like him. There’s no mistake about it. They mentioned his name. So I’m pretty sure it’s them.”
“Have you spoken to him?”
Adrienne shook her head. “Not yet. I just…want to organize my thoughts first.”
“He never mentioned this to you?”
“Never. But there were moments in the past when he would look worried or sad when he remembered something. He mentioned a family obligation that he forgot about. He didn’t say what it was. He was always changing the topic after that. I’m pretty sure this was it.”
“But maybe…maybe he doesn’t want to do it.”
Adrienne remembered Justin say, ‘It’s too late. I don’t want to do it anymore.’
“Okay, you said they agreed on this a long time ago. Maybe because you came along…Justin wouldn’t want to go through with this anymore. His parents wanted him to do it. But did you hear him say that he would?”
Adrienne shook her head. “But his parents will disinherit him if he defies them. And I know how much Justin’s family means to him, guys.”
“But you mean something to him too.”
Adrienne took a deep breath. “He hasn’t told me he loved me. But I know he loves his family more than anything.”
“Just because he hasn’t told you doesn’t mean he doesn’t,” Jill said. “Because we see him. And we know he is deeply in love with you.”
“But why didn’t he tell me about this?”
Yuan sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe he’s trying to fix it. So when he does tell you, there would be nothing for you to worry about anymore.”
Adrienne wiped the tears from her face. Her friends were right. Justin probably did want to fix it. That’s why he went back to Chicago with his parents. He said he would prepare his family first and then he would ask her to come to Chicago with him. He wouldn’t say that if he still planned on pushing his engagement to some other girl, right?
“Oh God! I hope he can convince his parents,” she breathed. “Because I don’t want to let him choose, you know. I won’t let him sacrifice his relationship with his parents for me. I know what it’s like to live with a mother that hates you and a father who couldn’t stand up for you. I won’t let Justin have that life, guys. I love him too much for that.”
“Sweetie… we’re sure you guys will be okay,” Jill said. “Believe in Justin. He won’t hurt you. He will fight for you.”
“I really hope you’re right. I…I don’t wanna lose him. It’s too soon.” Adrienne let out frustrated sigh. “God, can’t I have like…a month’s peace?” she asked, looking up. “I mean… Justin and I have been together officially for like a week. And now this.”
“If he really loves you, he will fight for you. Maybe he went to see his parents this weekend to call off his engagement with this bitch.”
“No wonder Justin was non-committal before. Maybe this was the reason why he never did relationships. He couldn’t commit because…he was already committed to somebody else. And the other girls were all like flings. To pass the time. To have some fun before he finally serves life imprisonment with some bitch who earned the right to be his fiancée just by being born.” Adrienne said, thinking out loud.
“But you weren’t just some pastime, Adrienne. He got serious with you.”
“Maybe he never meant to, but he couldn’t help it,” Jill suggested.
Adrienne sighed. “I can’t hold him back from his destiny. I can’t make him leave his family. He was a twin, you know? His brother died at birth. He’s the only one his parents got.”
Jill and Yuan smiled at her apologetically.
“Just wait. I’m sure he’ll fix this.” Yuan said.
“God, I hope he does. And soon! Because I need some strength to face my parents.”
“Why? What happened?”
“My parents called me. Apparently, news of Troy’s black eye reached them already. My Mom is pissed with me. Kim failed to mention to them that I found her on top of Troy, moaning her lungs out!”
“Of course. Whoever makes it to your parents first gets to throw the first stone.” Jill rolled her eyes. “Ooohh! I want to poke her eyes out!”
“It doesn’t matter whether they cheated on me. I cheated on Troy, too. And I was going to break up with Troy even before I found out. This was doomed to happen. My best bet is for my parents to understand that for o
nce, I’m doing something I want. Being with the person I love. And not just to please them.”
“Any parent should understand that!” Yuan groaned.
“Not my Mom. Apparently, she was doing me a favor for pushing me to date Troy. She said, I’d never do good in life. My best chance was to marry somebody successful. How pathetic did she think I was?”
“I wanna bitch-slap your Mom sometimes!” Yuan said. “I’m sorry. But I really don’t get how mean she is to you! Like you didn’t come from her! How could she demean you like this?”
“And there’s nothing to demean! She’s got a smart, beautiful daughter whose only wish is to please her! What more could she ask for?” Jill said.
“Well, now at least you can tell her that her choice wasn’t good enough for you,” Yuan added. “You managed to snag one of the richest bachelors in the country. Eat that Kimberly!”
“It doesn’t matter. Justin didn’t have to be rich. I’d still fall in love with him. Remember, when I did fall for him, we were just having dates in our apartments. We barely went out. I never got first-hand experience of knowing how rich he really was. We kept things low-key… quiet and simple. And I still fell in love with him.”
“But still, it must have been quite a shock for Kimberly!” Yuan asserted. “I wonder how she reacted when she first realized who you’re dating now. And how Troy felt when he found out who he lost you to.”
“Yeah! Justin freaking Adams!” Jill said cheerily.
“Must have been quite a shock for them,” Yuan continued. “Unfortunately, they weren’t shocked enough to have a heart attack. That would have been lovely!”
“Seriously, guys! I should be the one wishing them dead, not you. Whatever happens between Kim and me, she’s still my sister. She’s still family.”
“Tell that to her. She doesn’t seem to know!” Yuan rolled his eyes.
“So you still need to go to Boston?”
Adrienne nodded. “Yes. And I was hoping Justin would come with me.”
“He would,” Yuan said confidently. “He’s a decent guy. He won’t leave you in the air.”
“And not for some bitch who’s only connection with him is a business tie-up,” Jill added.
Adrienne buried her face in her hands and prevented herself from crying. “Oh, God, I hope you guys are right.”
That night, Adrienne decided to spend the night in Justin’s apartment, instead of hers. Justin had given her keys to his apartment they moment they got back from the resort. It was the first time she used her key without him actually being in the place.
She wanted to feel close to him. She laid down on his bed, the bed they usually spend their nights in. She hugged his pillows. They still smelled faintly of his aftershave.
She flipped her phone and dialed his number.
“Honey,” he greeted her after one ring.
His voice sounded so sweet to her and she immediately felt like crying. She realized just how much she loved him and wanted to keep him forever.
She took a deep breath. “I miss you,” she whispered. She tried to keep her voice steady. She didn’t want to let him know that something was up. She didn’t want to tell him yet that she knew about his engagement. Especially not over the phone.
It took him a moment to respond. “I hate being away from you,” he responded. “If I didn’t have… some things to fix here, I wouldn’t have gone at all.”
“Yes. I wish you were here, too.”
“Where are you?”
She sighed. “In your bed.”
He paused for a long while. Then he said, “If that’s your way of making me suffer even more, you’re succeeding.”
She giggled. “I’ve missed you. I thought if I spend the night in your bed, I’d still somehow feel like you’re just here next to me.”
“I’d come back right now, if I could.”
“It’s okay. We’ll see each other on Monday.”
“Until then, it will be torturous.”
They both fell quiet for a couple of seconds… just feeling each other’s presence, no matter how far they were from each other.
Then finally, Adrienne said, “Good night, Justin.”
“Good night, honey,” Justin said soberly. “I’ll be making love to you… in my dreams.”
When Adrienne hung up the phone, she hugged his pillow and let all the tears fall.
23. Al Haqiqah.
Arabic meaning The Truth or Reality.
It seemed like an eternity before Adrienne faced Justin again. During the two days that they spent apart, she tried to act normally. He’d call her at least three times a day. She didn’t want him to think that something was up. Because knowing him, he just might fly back to New York earlier than scheduled and he only got two days to spend with his family.
Monday evening, he appeared on her doorstep.
“Hi,” she greeted him, pasting a smile on her face.
He stared at her for a while. And without a word, he pulled her to him and crushed his lips to hers.
“Justin,” she whispered against his lips.
“I missed you,” he said, lifting her off her feet and carrying her to the bedroom.
When he put her down on her feet, she stared up at him. She could see fatigue in his eyes. “I missed you, too.”
He smiled at her, but she knew him better now. His eyes didn’t sparkle and it looked like he was forcing the smile on his face. Adrienne already knew that something was up.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
He nodded. “I am now.”
“Justin…” she started.
He silenced her with a kiss. She kissed him back. Their kiss became passionate. It was evident that he didn’t want to talk. He just wanted to lose himself in her. And she allowed him.
Within minutes, they were in bed, panting. They rode the tide of passion that threatened to consume both of them.
“Adrienne…” Justin whispered. He was more urgent than usual. She matched his kisses, his passion with equal fervor. She loved this man and she didn’t want to lose him. She wanted to claim him, as much as he was claiming her.
When she reached her peak, she screamed his name in ecstasy. In the midst of their passion, she managed to remember that they got lost too soon, Justin wasn’t even wearing protection.
“Honey…we don’t have protection,” she panted.
He stared back at her in eyes drunk with passion, consumed by desire. His expression was so intense, she almost didn’t recognize him.
He took her mouth in his in a rough, passionate kiss. She kissed him back, holding him close to her.
Then he leaned his forehead against hers and he whispered in a hoarse voice, “Tell me you love me, Adrienne.”
She blinked back at him, finally gaining back some of her senses. “What?”
She stared back at him, unable to understand what he was asking of her.
“Tell me… that you’re in love with me,” he said, his voice pleading. He drew in a deep breath. Then he added, “The same way that I am so, so… in love with you.”
Her heart pounded inside her chest and she struggled to find her voice. Emotions enveloped her all at once and she fought for air. She smiled at him, tears glistening in her eyes. “Justin…you know I am.”
A slow, triumphant smile spread across his face. “I wanna hear you say it, honey.”
She pulled him to her and kissed him passionately. When she came up for air, she said, “I love you, Justin Adams. With all my heart.”
He kissed her back. “I love you, Adrienne Miller. With all my heart. With all my soul. With all that I am,” he said. And with that, she felt him move within her, more passionately and more urgently that it brought her once again to her peak.
“Justin!” she screamed.
“Adrienne, I love you so much!” he screamed her name and within seconds she felt his body rock within her.
He tightened his arms around her as he buried his face into the mass of her hair, taking
in her scent, feeling her every heartbeat, listening to her every breath. They remained joined, still one with each other. And all Adrienne could think of was how he told her he loved her.
Justin continued kissing her, nuzzling her neck. Her eyes were half-closed. She was consumed by the power of their lovemaking. It was intense. And she knew that she had just given herself completely to him. Her heart and her soul now both belonged to Justin.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispered to her.
She smiled. “So are you.” Then, she again remembered that they weren’t wearing protection. “Justin… you weren’t wearing any rubber.”
He stared back at her. She expected him to panic, and realize what just happened. They were both lost in their passion that they actually forgot about the risks. But he said, “I know.” He leaned down and kissed her once again.
“Justin, I’m not on the pill.” She remembered that she should have thought about this since the day she lost her virginity.
“I know,” he said again.
“Justin…”
He silenced her with a kiss.
“Do you think I would worry, Adrienne?” he asked. “I love you, honey.”
She bit her lip and kissed him back. “I love you, too.”
He smiled back at her. “Then we have nothing to worry about.”
Finally, he pulled out of her and rolled on his back. He gathered her in her arms. She rested her head on his shoulder.
They got lost in their thoughts for a while. Justin silently caressed her arms and kissed the top of her head once in a while.
She wondered what happened in Chicago. Did he manage to convince his parents not to go through with their arrangement to marry him off? Did he win? Is he finally free?
She took a deep breath. “Justin… is everything all right with you and your parents?”
It took a moment for him to answer. “Nothing I can’t handle.”
She stared up at him, searching his face. Again, his eyes weren’t dancing. Something was there beneath their depths. Something that worried Adrienne.
She didn’t want to tell him that she knew about his engagement. She wanted him to tell her at his own time. When he managed to fix things. When he’s ready.