William Shakespeare's Avengers

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William Shakespeare's Avengers Page 6

by Ian Doescher


  ’Tis nightmarish beyond imagination.

  STARK

  I have a cluster made of shrapnel deep

  Within my chest, attempting, ev’ry second, 385

  To crawl its way inside my very heart.

  [He taps his chest.

  This small contraption ever stoppeth it,

  A circle made of light that, like the sun,

  My life dependeth on. ’Tis part of me—

  ’Tis more than armor, ’tis my very self. 390

  A priv’lege terrible we live withal.

  BANNER

  Thou canst control the thing that powers thee.

  STARK

  Indeed, thus I have learn’d o’er many years.

  BANNER

  ’Tis grossly different.

  STARK

  —Is it, in faith?

  I read the story of thine accident— 395

  A tale told by the media, and full

  Of sound and fury, signifying all.

  Such gamma radiation should have kill’d thee.

  BANNER

  Thou dost imply the Hulk—the other guy—

  Hath sav’d my life? ’Tis sweet, this sentiment. 400

  And yet, for what?

  STARK

  —It may be we’ll find out.

  BANNER

  Thou may extremely disappointed be

  At what thou findest. Thou shalt not enjoy’t.

  STARK

  I think, however, that thou might.

  [Exeunt Tony Stark and Bruce Banner.

  ROGERS

  —This cause

  May yet prove either right or wrong, ’tis true, 405

  And somehow I must make determination.

  As Doctor Banner said, I have my doubts,

  For something of the situation feels

  Suspicious, as if we were not told all.

  My purpose, though, is to safeguard the good— 410

  ’Tis why I was entrusted with such pow’rs,

  And I shall not neglect my duties now.

  Most cautiously I shall detective play,

  To satisfy my curiosity

  And gain intelligence about our mission. 415

  I’ll quickly search the cargo decks, wherein

  The secrets S.H.I.E.L.D. doth shield may yet be found.

  Run, Rogers, to thy work and search the ship,

  Grasp thou the truth secure within thy grip.

  [Exit.

  SCENE 1

  The S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier.

  ENTER ERIK SELVIG ABOVE, ON BALCONY, WITH SOME OF LOKI’S MINIONS.

  SELVIG

  Iridium, the precious silver metal,

  Is delicate and passing fragile also.

  However, when its power we have harness’d,

  Unstoppable shall be our mighty forces!

  [Exeunt.

  ENTER PHIL COULSON AND THOR.

  COULSON

  As soon as Loki captur’d Doctor Selvig, 5

  We mov’d Jane Foster to a safer place.

  There is an excellent observatory

  In Tromsø, where but yesterday she was

  Invited suddenly for consultation.

  Paid well, she journeys on a private plane 10

  And travels unto whereabouts remote.

  She shall be safe.

  THOR

  —Good Agent Coulson, thanks.

  That Loki captur’d Selvig is, methinks,

  No accident of chance or circumstance.

  I dread his plans for Selvig once he’s done. 15

  A good man Erik is, and always was.

  COULSON

  He speaketh of you oft. You chang’d his life.

  Indeed, you chang’d our world completely, sir.

  THOR

  ’Twas better as it was, before I came.

  On Asgard, we pretend we’re more advanc’d 20

  But we come skirmishing as bilgesnipe do.

  COULSON

  What?

  THOR

  —Bilgesnipe—hornèd creatures, large and fierce.

  Thou must have them on earth—dost thou not know

  The bilgesnipe holiday traditions, eh? 25

  How once there was a man who spotted eight

  Strong bilgesnipe who convey’d, upon a sleigh,

  The mighty Freya, on a Yuletide night?

  Pray, say thou art familiar with the tale!

  COULSON

  ’Tis unfamiliar. Mine apologies. 30

  THOR

  The beasts are utterly repulsive and

  Tread over ev’rything they come upon.

  When first I came to earth, ’twas Loki’s rage

  That follow’d swiftly on, like bilgesnipe ire,

  And sadly did thy people pay the price. 35

  Once more it happens. As a youth, did I

  Court war, though now I wish for times of peace.

  ENTER NICK FURY.

  FURY

  War hath not started yet—we may still quell’t.

  Could you, perforce, make Loki tell us where

  The Tesseract is kept?

  THOR

  —I do not know, 40

  For Loki’s mind doth wander far afield.

  ’Tis not mere pow’r he craveth—vengeance, too,

  On me. No pain would satisfy that need.

  FURY

  Yea, many think the same ’til pain begins.

  THOR

  What, sirrah, art thou asking me to do? 45

  FURY

  Nay, ask I what are you prepar’d to do?

  THOR

  He’s pow’rless—Loki is a prisoner.

  FURY

  I prithee, tell me this: why doth it seem

  He is the only person ’board this ship

  Who wisheth to be here? Is not that strange? 50

  [Exeunt, in discussion.

  ENTER LOKI ASIDE, IN HIS CELL. ENTER NATASHA ROMANOFF QUIETLY, OUTSIDE.

  LOKI

  Thy skill with silence is a splendid thing—

  Not many can sneak up on me sans notice.

  ROMANOFF

  In thy dark mind, though, knewest thou I’d come.

  LOKI

  Methought ’twould after be, and not before—

  Yea, after Fury doth concoct some torture, 55

  And practice it upon my helpless body,

  ’Twas then I did imagine thou wouldst come

  As balm and friend, so I’d cooperate.

  ROMANOFF

  What horrid deeds hast done to Agent Barton?

  LOKI

  His mind hath open’d been—no longer clos’d. 60

  ROMANOFF

  Once thou hast won, the king upon the mount,

  What happens to his open’d, broken mind?

  LOKI

  Is’t love that moves thee, Agent Romanoff?

  ’Tis wherefore thou dost look on me with hate.

  ROMANOFF

  Love is for children. I owe him a debt 65

  In payment for his deeds in bleaker times.

  LOKI

  Pray, tell the story. Hide it not from me.

  ROMANOFF

  Ere I did work for S.H.I.E.L.D., I made a name

  As one with a partic’lar set of skills,

  Acquirèd o’er a very long career. 70

  I car’d not for or on whom they were us’d.

  S.H.I.E.L.D. learn’d of me, my darken’d reputation,

  And sent forth Agent Barton to destroy me.

  Yet he decided diff’rently and spar’d

  My life that I mi
ght join the cause with him. 75

  LOKI

  What wouldst thou grant me, an I spare him, too?

  His death is not requir’d.

  ROMANOFF

  —Not let thee out,

  For Barton is worth more than faithless barters.

  LOKI

  Yet this is marvelous—this game I’ll play!

  Thy world hangs in the balance and thou wouldst 80

  Make bargains for a sole, unbalanc’d man.

  ROMANOFF

  Regimes fall ev’ry day and I weep not.

  My folk have witness’d harsher, darker days,

  And seen the change of one pow’r to the next.

  I am of Russia—or, at least, I was. 85

  LOKI

  Thou wert then, yea, but tell: what art thou now?

  ROMANOFF

  The matter is not foggy in the least—

  My ledger runneth red; I’d turn it black.

  LOKI

  Can so much writ in red erasèd be?

  Thou, Dreykov’s daughter, of São Paulo fame, 90

  The fire inside the hospital, ’tis true?

  Yea, Barton told me ev’rything he knoweth.

  Your ledger drippeth—gusheth—red with blood,

  Yet thou think’st saving one man who, in sooth,

  Is no more virtuous than thine own self, 95

  Will change a tittle of the scarlet hue?

  This sentiment is base, thou art a child

  Who whispers orisons and doth imagine

  That some god, far off, hears and shall respond.

  Pathetic woman—thou dost lie and kill 100

  In service of the liars and the killers.

  Thou thinkest thou are separate, withal

  A code thou keepest only to thyself,

  Aught that shall keep away the frightful horrors,

  Yet they are part of thee, and e’er shall be. 105

  [He strikes the wall of his cell. Romanoff seems to be full of fear and grief.

  I’ll not touch Barton ’til he killeth thee!

  ’Twill be my order—slowly, intimately,

  In ev’ry way he knoweth of thy fear.

  Then shall he wake just long enow to see—

  In terror and dismay—the work he’s done, 110

  And when he screams, I’ll split his skull in twain.

  Such is my bargain for thee, mewling quim.

  ROMANOFF

  Thou art a monster, sent from blackest hell.

  LOKI

  Nay, ye did bring the monster. Yea, ’tis true.

  [Romanoff immediately stops acting scared.

  ROMANOFF

  A-ha! Bruce Banner, then, is thy dim move. 115

  LOKI

  What dost thou play at, eh? Did this not work?

  ROMANOFF

  [into radio:] ’Tis Loki’s plan the glooming Hulk to free.

  Keep Banner in the lab—I thither go.

  Send Thor as well; we may have need of him.

  [To Loki:] My thanks for thy most swift cooperation. 120

  [Exeunt from cell area.

  ENTER TONY STARK AND BRUCE BANNER IN LABORATORY. LOKI’S SCEPTER SITS NEARBY. ENTER NICK FURY SEVERALLY.

  FURY

  What ruses are you plying, Master Stark?

  Our screens do flash with warnings of a virus

  That swiftly overtakes our systems strong.

  STARK

  I’ve wonder’d the selfsame of thine intentions—

  What base deceptions are you plying, Fury? 125

  FURY

  Your task is plain: to find the Tesseract.

  BANNER

  We do, indeed. The model hath been lock’d,

  And sweepeth for the signature e’en now.

  Our massive search shall, sometime, get a hit—

  Within a half mile we shall know the place. 130

  STARK

  Indeed, we’ll find the Cube and thou shalt have

  It back sans muss or fuss. [Looking at a screen:] What is

  phase two?

  ENTER STEVE ROGERS, SETTING A WEAPON DOWN ON A TABLE.

  ROGERS

  Phase two I found below—its hardware, too—

  For S.H.I.E.L.D. would use the Cube to fashion weapons.

  Apologies—computers were too slow. 135

  FURY

  Hear, Rogers: we have gather’d ev’rything

  Related to the Tesseract we could.

  Although you found this weapon, ’tis no proof—

  STARK

  I’m sorry I must interrupt thee, Nick—

  [Stark shows him the screen, which displays a weapon.

  What wert thou lying?

  ENTER NATASHA ROMANOFF AND THOR.

  ROGERS

  —Thou hast play’d us false. 140

  Wrong were my words, Director Fury, yea:

  Our base world hath not changèd one iota.

  BANNER

  [to Romanoff:] Didst thou know of this grand deceit

  before?

  ROMANOFF

  I prithee, Doctor Banner, think about

  Departing from this shady scene anon. 145

  BANNER

  I was at large in yon Calcutta—my

  Departure could not have been better made.

  ROMANOFF

  Yet Loki is manipulating thee—

  ’Tis his dark plan.

  BANNER

  —Art thou not acting same?

  It seems thy lies are just as great as his. 150

  ROMANOFF

  Thou didst not hither come because I bat

  My black eyelashes in thy face. Nay, Doctor—

  BANNER

  And I’ll not leave because thy senses grow

  More twitchy than they ought. [To Fury:] I fain would

  know

  Why S.H.I.E.L.D. employs the Tesseract to make 155

  These weapons built for mass destruction, sir.

  [Fury points to Thor.

  FURY

  Because of him and all his power.

  THOR

  —Me?

  FURY

  One year past, from space deepest he arriv’d—

  Another planet come to call on us.

  His grudge match did a small town whole destroy, 160

  More devastating than the sack of Troy.

  We learn’d two things: first, we are not alone,

  And second, we are hopelessly outgunn’d—

  To such extent ’twould be hilarious

  If ’twere not passing dangerous for all. 165

  THOR

  My people yearn for peace, and nothing more,

  Withal the planet earth. ’Twas ever so.

  FURY

  Yet ye are not the only people yonder,

  Amidst the twinkling canopy of stars.

  Forsooth, ye are not our sole threat therefrom. 170

  The world grows full with people—species—who

  Cannot be match’d by any other pow’r,

  Or be controll’d.

  ROGERS

  —As ye controll’d the Cube?

  THOR

  S.H.I.E.L.D.’s errant research of the Tesseract

  Drew Loki and his allies back to earth. 175

  ’Tis but a signal to the other realms

  That earth is prim’d for higher forms of war.

  ROGERS

  What higher form mean’st thou?

  FURY

  —You forc’d our hand.

  We were but bound to think of some response,

  Or ’twould be as if we st
ood like a man at 180

  A mark, with a whole army shooting at us.

  STARK

  Insisted ye on nuclear deterrents,

  For hist’ry shows us ’tis a calming force.

  FURY

  Remind me, Stark: how was your fortune made?

  ROGERS

  If he still fashion’d weapons, Stark would surely— 185

  STARK

  I beg thy pardon, Captain, how hath our

  Discussion turn’d its spotlight onto me?

  ROGERS

  Is not the spotlight fix’d upon thee, Stark?

  THOR

  Methought ye folk were more evolv’d than this.

  FURY

  Are you in jest? Did we come to your planet, 190

  And there begin destroying things at random?

  THOR

  Ye treat your champions with such mistrust.

  ROMANOFF

  Are both of you so frightfully naïve?

  S.H.I.E.L.D. wisely monitors potential threats.

  BANNER

  Now Cap’n America is on threat watch? 195

  I hop’d he might have greater things to do.

  [They all continue arguing, as Loki’s scepter among them begins to glow.

  ENTER CLINT BARTON, PILOT 1, AND VARIOUS OF LOKI’S MINIONS, ON BALCONY, IN A SHIP APPROACHING THE HELICARRIER. ENTER A S.H.I.E.L.D. SOLDIER ASIDE, BELOW.

  SOLDIER 1

  Approaching vessel—transport six-six-bravo—

  Relay confirm codes presently, I pray.

  Ye are on the computer, not the day log.

  What is your haul?

  PILOT 1

  —’Tis arms and ammunition. 200

  [Exit Soldier 1.

  THOR

  [to Fury:] Thou speakest of control, yet chaos seek’st.

  BANNER

  ’Tis ever his vast modus operandi.

  Are we a team? Nay, we are none—ne’er were.

  We are a mixture form’d of chemicals

  Creating chaos through adverse reactions. 205

  We are a bomb prim’d, nearly bound to burst.

  FURY

  You need to step down, Banner—calm your nerves.

  STARK

  If he would, like an engine, blow his steam,

  Why should he not?

  ROGERS

  —Thou knowest why. Back down!

  STARK

  Increaseth now my wish that thou wouldst make me— 210

  Or even try.

  ROGERS

  —Big man in suit of armor!

  If thou removest it, what art thou then?

  STARK

  Intelligent—a genius—billionaire,

  Philanthropist and playboy wrapp’d in one.

  ROMANOFF

  [aside:] He hath a point—his prospects are not murky. 215

  ROGERS

  But those who have not thine advantages

 

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