"Siena?" he said softly. Insistently.
Her gaze jumped to his, eyes shimmering with tears. "You weren't fucking me." She sounded shocked. She looked shocked.
"No, mi vida, I was not," he admitted, because she looked so vulnerable, so confused, he needed to reassure her. It was as necessary to him as breathing.
She pressed her lips together. "I don't understand you, Elijah."
"I know, mi amorcito," he said. He kissed her chin and then couldn't resist nibbling. "But you will. Give yourself time and you'll understand me perfectly." He eased his body out of hers. "Can you sleep now? I'll get a washcloth and clean you up, but I need to know you can go back to sleep and not have nightmares."
She smiled at him, lifted a hand to the mass of hair spilling around her and then touched his mouth, tracing his lips. He liked that. He liked that she liked his mouth, and she did. That was clear.
"I think you chased my nightmares away, Elijah."
He flashed a satisfied grin at her, kissed her finger and exited the bed to get a warm washcloth.
Siena watched Elijah walk away from her, completely comfortable with his nudity. She was already pulling the edges of her shirt together and buttoning them. He came back, his eyes glittering at her in the dark as he sank down onto the bed beside her and carefully washed her thighs, pressing the warm cloth between her legs.
"I didn't hurt you?"
She shook her head. "Not at all. I think I'm definitely healing. The laceration on my leg is the worst, although I'm mostly self-conscious of the one on my face."
"Which is silly," he said, his attention on what he was doing.
She knew that. It was vain, but still. She bit her lip. "Um. Elijah, I'm starving. I didn't eat, remember?"
His gaze jumped back to her face. "You wouldn't let me get you food when Jake and Emma were here."
"I didn't want to eat in front of them," she admitted.
He sighed and shook his head. "Were you hungry when they left?"
His tone demanded honesty. She didn't want to try to lie, figuring he would know instantly she wasn't telling the truth, so she shrugged. He scowled.
"You were hungry and you didn't say anything. That's not acceptable, baby. You tell me when you need something." His eyes had gone diamond hard, pure mercury, glittering with menace. "I'm not bragging, but I know my way around a kitchen."
There it was. The Elijah she expected. Bossy. Intimidating. Only this time she wasn't afraid in the least. He was gently cleaning her thighs as well as other, more secret places, his touch tender even when his voice was scary hard. She hid a small smile, thinking it best she keep that knowledge to herself.
"I'll keep that in mind for the future," she said. "And I'll admit I'm really, really hungry, so if you have anywhere near the skills in the kitchen you have in the bedroom, now would be the time to whip them out and show off."
His glittering gaze drifted over her face slowly, taking in every detail as if ensuring himself she was perfectly fine. He touched her lips, his fingers pressing over them with the same gentleness he used cleaning her, but he dragged his fingers across her lips, tracing them, and then down, the gesture turning her heart over.
"You deserve the world, Siena," he said softly. "And I'm going to give it to you."
Everything in her went still. His eyes had gone all silver. Dark silver. Glittering silver, and so intense his gaze pierced her, went right through her, aiming straight at her heart and finding its target. She wanted to believe him. She did believe him. How could she not when he was looking at her with such raw, stark emotion naked on his face for her to see?
She knew no one else had ever seen that look. No one had ever seen him exposed the way he was giving himself to her. That look turned her inside out. He was a strong man, a dangerous one, and closed off from the world. His extremely handsome face was normally expressionless. He didn't give anything away, certainly not his emotions, but there it was, laid out for her.
"Elijah." She whispered his name because she could barely speak.
Everything in her life was gone. She was scared and confused, but there was Elijah holding out his hand to her. Bringing her safely to his side. Wrapping her in his strength and protection. Offering the world to her. His world.
Siena's heart accelerated. She didn't know what his world entailed. She didn't want her child to grow up in her grandfather's world. What and who was Elijah Lospostos? The man sitting on the bed with her, so tender and sweet? Or the man who sat at her grandfather's table, commanding the room in spite of his age. Others had deferred to him. Even her grandfather had treated him with respect. Now he was working with Drake Donovan on Drake's security team. What did that mean?
"Baby, you should never play poker," Elijah cautioned.
She twisted her fingers together. "You're a good man, Elijah. What were you doing with my grandfather?"
She watched his face shut down. All that emotion swept away in an instant, and he was once again handsome, hard, scary and dangerous, giving absolutely nothing away.
"I'm not a good man, Siena. You tie yourself to me, you'll never have that. You'll never be free of the reputation and the rumors. The whispers. Cops will harass you. People will stare or look away fast. You're with me, that's what you can expect. I'll shield you always from the worst of it, but you have to know it will be there."
"That doesn't tell me anything."
"It tells you what to expect, and the rest of it, I swear, I'll lay out to you, just give me a little time."
"A little time for what?" she persisted.
"I'm asking for this, mi amor. A little time. Can you give me that?"
She studied his face. He was so beautiful, and maybe he was just as lost as she was, but he was a good man. She felt it. She knew it. She took a deep breath and nodded. She could do that, but they would have the conversation.
Elijah bent his head and kissed her. Gently. Turning her heart over. He moved then, up off the bed, back to the master bath to deal with the washcloth. Her gaze followed him, the fluid, easy way he moved. He was leopard. A shifter. She didn't--yet--know much about them, but she did know they shared the traits of the large cats that were so much a part of them. Leopards were jealous, temperamental creatures, with snarling bad tempers and the ability to strike hard and fast. All leopards were lethal, even those that were raised from baby to adult by humans.
He took her breath away just by moving. He turned her body into a place of sweet, exquisite ecstasy. She had no doubt he would protect her the instant she was threatened. She liked the way he always moved in close to her.
"You coming?" Elijah stood in the doorway, dragging on a pair of jeans. Barefoot. Hair unruly and a little wild. Silver eyes gleaming at her. Jeans riding low, barely buttoned.
She slid out of bed and went right to him, taking the hand he held out. She had no idea what she was doing with Elijah Lospostos, the man who claimed he wasn't a good man, who told her straight-out, but she liked the way he pulled her in close to him, tight against his side, under his shoulder, his arm clamped around her, but down low, avoiding the four lacerations on her back. That meant something to her. That he would take care even in the way he held her.
"Do you ever get lost in this house?"
He laughed softly, the sound startling her. He had a beautiful laugh. It was soft and warm and totally addicting. She could listen to that sound for the rest of her life.
"I don't know why you're laughing, because I'm going to get very lost. I have no sense of direction." That wasn't entirely true, but if it kept him laughing she'd be satisfied.
"I'll put up signs for you," he said. "Big ones that you can't miss." He dipped his head down, his chin sliding over the top of her head before he swept her to what obviously was the center of the house, a large glass atrium. "They're all going to point straight back to me."
She stopped dead, forcing him to stop as well. She looked around her in shock. The atrium was filled with plants, trees even. Thick, beautiful bushe
s and flowering plants were everywhere. Water trickled over stones lined with bright green moss. It was a massive room that curved and twisted so it was impossible to see everything.
"Oh. My. God. This is why you bought the house." It was beautiful. The most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.
"Not exactly," he denied. "But a part of it. I told you about the exits in the bedroom. This house has many escape routes built in. Safe places for both human and leopard. The atrium has the best hidden exits for leopards. It's a labyrinth of underground tunnels."
She tilted her head to look up at him, her breasts pressed into his side. His gaze found hers, his eyes back to mercury, a glittering, scary look that meant they were on dangerous ground. There were reasons for needing escape routes. Reasons like Marco, a hit man sent by someone who supposedly was a friend.
The iron bar that was his arm tensed as he moved her forward around the huge glass room to the kitchen just beyond it. There was a small group of comfortable chairs where others could gather while the cook prepared a meal, and Elijah led her straight to the most comfortable armchair.
"You can curl up there." He slid the pad of his thumb over her lips. "I notice you like to pull your feet up onto any chair you're sitting on. This one has enough room to do that."
Her heart did that curious melting thing. He'd noticed the habit she'd had since as far back as she could remember. He'd noticed, and he'd found the perfect chair for her to relax in. It was much more difficult resisting him than she thought it would be because he really cared enough to notice everything about her.
Siena drew her knees up and rested her chin on top, her eyes on him as he moved around the kitchen--in the dark.
"You like grilled cheese?"
"Do you grill it in butter?"
His white teeth flashed and then disappeared. A small grin, but every cell in her body reacted. He was beautiful. Handsome.
"Is there any other way?"
"Nope." She could look at him forever. When she was a teenager she'd stared at pictures of him, spent hours studying him from every angle. She especially liked his wild hair and his exotic, unusual eyes. Silver. Gray. Dark. He had so many different colors to his eyes depending on his mood. Now she knew part of that was his leopard.
"Elijah? Why would my grandfather want you dead? Why would he want any of them dead? When I confronted him, he said he had to strike before you did. What did that mean?"
She kept her eyes on him, leopard eyes, using the sight that allowed her to see six times better than her human eyes in the dark. She used her leopard senses to listen for a lie. She wanted to catch every change in his body language.
Elijah sighed. "These are things you don't need to know or worry about, Siena. That life, that part of my life, should never touch you. It will, but I'd prefer to keep it to a minimum. You knowing anything puts you at risk."
There was honesty in his voice. She didn't hear the slightest hint of subterfuge, and she listened for it.
"I'm already at risk," she pointed out. "I'm sitting here with you, Elijah, in your kitchen. In your shirt. Your baby in my womb. Your cock was just inside of me. I'm already at risk, and I want to know what risk there is for my child before I make any commitment to you."
The moment the words came out of her mouth, his gaze jumped to hers. Glittery. Slashing. Silver this time. Dark silver. Cutting silver. His leopard was there, stamped on his face, a predatory animal, all male and very, very dominant. He had gone completely still. A statue, standing there on the other side of the aisle, frozen in place, a frying pan in his fist.
She didn't fool herself that she was safe. She knew what a leopard could do. One jump could cover sixty feet easily. She was far less than sixty feet away from him.
"You're sitting in my kitchen. In my shirt. My baby in your womb. My cock was just inside of you, and deep inside, you've still got my seed. Make no mistake, Siena. None. You're already committed to me. You made that commitment when you gave your body to me. When I came inside you and your eyes went dazed and that beauty was on your face. Don't think you can give that to me and then take it back. Because, baby, that shit is fucking not going to happen. Not ever."
His voice was rough. Edgy. Harsh even. There was no hint of softness, or gentle or tender. She found herself facing the savage nature of the leopard. They stared at each other, and Siena refused to back down.
She lifted her chin in defiance, her hand coming up to cover her belly protectively. His gaze fastened on her chin and his eyes went darker. Sexy. All male. Uh-oh. She'd, without saying a word, made things worse. She knew that just by his eyes, and when he put down the frying pan and stalked across the room toward her.
9
SIENA didn't break eye contact. Her heart beat wildly as Elijah prowled across the room in utter silence. He didn't make a single sound. She could hear her own heart pounding and the roar of blood in her ears as he approached. He could intimidate from across the room, but up close, he was terrifying. She held her breath when, for a moment, he towered over her.
Abruptly he crouched low, catching her chin in his hand. "You. Do. Not. Ever. Look at me like that. I'm not Paolo. I would never hurt you. My leopard would never hurt you."
His fingers tightened on her chin and he bent his head until his mouth was inches from hers. "What I might do, you keep defying me like this, is tie you to my bed and fuck your brains out until you cry for mercy and beg me to put a ring on your finger. I'm not above doing that. Using sex to get my way. And baby, fair warning, I'm damned good at sex. I can get very creative. So you think to run from me and take away my woman because things get a little dicey, think again."
She sucked in her breath, mostly because she wanted to see how truly creative he could be and that meant continuing to defy him, and truthfully, he scared the crap out of her when he was looking so lethal.
Elijah's mouth brushed hers and just that light touch sent a jarring bolt of lightning straight to her core. His eyes didn't close. Neither did hers. They stared at each other, his gaze so intense she felt her resistance was melting.
Siena shook her head to try to break his mesmerizing spell. "You can't order me to stay with you, Elijah. I need to figure this out. I'm not just making decisions for me, but for my baby as well."
His eyes glittered ominously, and her heart sank. Definitely a mistake. A really, really bad mistake.
"Our baby. Our child. Not yours, Siena. That baby is mine as well. When you're making those decisions, it isn't just you and the baby. It's you, the baby and me. I'm part of that. Don't start by trying to cut me out, because I can tell you, and you'd better listen to me, I'm not getting cut out. Not from our child's life and not from your life. We're working this shit out."
She pressed her hand hard around her baby. His gaze dropped instantly, noting that small, protective, minute movement. His much larger hand covered hers.
"We're better together, Siena. Look at us. The two of us. Together, watching out for our child. I'm the shield. The armor. I'm the one standing in front of you both. Shielding you from anything. From everything."
God. God. She wanted him. She wanted him in her life. She wanted the crazy, macho, alpha leopard with his sexy eyes and velvet voice and hard, muscular body. She wanted his protection. She wanted all of it--except his lifestyle. Whatever that was. Because she didn't know.
"Elijah." She tried soft. Not defiant. She realized defiant brought out the leopard in him. The dominant. "I'm not trying to take anything away from you. I'm trying to understand. Maybe I'm not using the right words, but I didn't know what kind of terrible things my grandfather was into. My parents were killed by a car bomb. I was kidnapped. I was used to deliver wine so a hit man could sneak into houses and kill people. I lived a lie for years. I will not do that again. I will not have our child doing that. So you need to tell me what I have to know."
She reached out her hand and cupped the side of his face, running her thumb along his jaw. "Honey, I'd so much rather not know, but I can't do that.
I really, really can't, so if you want me in your life, you're going to have to tell me what I'm facing and let me make a decision."
He stared at her for what seemed an eternity, abruptly pulled away and was on his feet, pacing across the room in long, angry strides, swearing in Spanish. One arm lashed out and for a split second she actually saw a paw as it swiped at the frying pan on the counter and sent it flying. It hit the wall with a loud crash and clattered to the floor.
She bit down hard on her lower lip and pressed her hand tighter against her belly. She had really roused the leopard. She curled deeper into the chair, grateful that Elijah paced back and forth on the opposite side of the aisle, keeping it between them. She knew he was attempting to make her feel safe by staying on the other side of the room, but she could actually feel the oppressive air, so heavy with his temper.
He didn't want to tell her anything. That was a really bad sign. Still, she couldn't back down. She wanted to--for him. For herself even. But she couldn't, for her child. She sat in the chair, watching Elijah closely. He was angry, yes. She could see that, but not at her. That took a moment to sink in. He was angry with the situation and it dawned on her that he was afraid of losing her. He didn't want to lose her. Her heart melted even more.
She'd been honest with him. She couldn't have her child living in a situation that wasn't safe. Or that was illegal and totally wrong. Drug trafficking? Gunrunning ? What exactly was Elijah involved in that he didn't want her to know about? What had her grandfather been involved in aside from having their friends murdered?
With a little sigh she got to her feet, took a deep breath and padded barefoot across the room, to the other side of the island where Elijah stood. She moved in close and wrapped her arms around his middle, leaning her weight into him. He stood stiffly for a moment, every muscle locked in place, his body feeling like a steel wall. Very slowly, almost reluctantly he put his arms around her, locking her to him.
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