Sorrow and Second Chances

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Sorrow and Second Chances Page 8

by E Bradshaw


  The surrounding noise within the room immediately died away as everyone else turned to look at the cause of the commotion, and an uneasy hush descended. Darcy and Charles were far outnumbered by military men and could easily have been set upon if any of the men there had had any time to retaliate. However, Darcy was in no mood to pull back, nor was he concerned about potential consequences to his own safety. He looked absolutely formidable in his rage; his eyes glinted with dark fury, and his imposing bearing and towering height was enough to make other men hesitate about confronting him.

  The man at Darcy’s feet began to scramble upright again, cursing and spitting blood as he glared balefully up at Darcy. With an expression of disgust, Darcy violently seized the man by the scruff of his neck and hauled him back onto his feet to pin him against the wall behind. Holding the man securely with a fierce grip upon his collar, Darcy closed the remaining gap between them, bringing his face close to the other man’s to issue him with a deadly-serious warning. And though Darcy spoke quietly, the silence in the room was so absolute that everyone there could hear his words. “If you or any one of your companions ever makes an improper move on any of the Bennet sisters, then you will answer to me personally,” Darcy threatened him menacingly. “They are ladies and you will treat them as such – and if I ever hear of you or anyone else speaking such contemptible words about them, then you won’t get away so lightly next time.”

  And with this, Darcy shoved the man away, as if disgusted by the very sight of him, and turned to stalk out of the inn. Charles gulped audibly, and with a wide-eyed, shocked expression, he hurriedly threw some coins down on the table in payment for their meal and then started after his friend. Everyone in the room cautiously watched the two of them as they strode away – and only one man was foolish enough to step in their way to confront Darcy as they made their way out.

  “It was only a bit of banter,” the man growled as he deliberately stepped into Darcy’s path and challenged him with a resentful glare. “If you’re offended by plain-spoken soldiers’ talk, then perhaps you should choose where you eat a little more carefully – somewhere where your delicate, high-born sensitivities won’t be offended,” he added scornfully. “You should be careful, for next time you wander into the wrong place, you might just find yourself in some serious trouble.”

  The tension in the room was already acute, but it seemed to sharpen further still as the gathered men watched to see how Darcy might respond to such a blatant threat. However, if some of them had hoped to see Darcy quail, or even apologise, then they were to be disappointed. Instead, Darcy merely gifted the man with a look of utter contempt and drew himself up to his full height – and when he responded, it was clear from his tone that he wasn’t in the slightest bit intimidated by the other man. “I have no problem with soldiers in general,” he replied coolly, “but I do have a distinct aversion to fools who discuss women as though they are nothing but pieces of meat. Now, are you going to step out of my way,” he asked icily, “or do I need to explain my views to you in any more detail?”

  Darcy had phrased his words as a question, but he delivered them in the decisive tone of a command, and the man who had thought to stop him from leaving suddenly thought better of it. Hastily, he stepped out of Darcy’s way and he did not dare to say anything else, and instead he had to content himself with staring sullenly at Darcy and Charles as they stalked away. Indeed, as soon as the door swung shut after them, the rumble of conversation immediately resumed within the inn, as groups of men excitedly exchanged remarks on what they had just witnessed.

  Very soon the celebratory atmosphere returned to the company gathered there, and most of the men quickly put the confrontation out of their minds altogether – except, that was, for the few men who had been directly involved with the stand-off with Darcy, who each returned to their drinks with sullen looks. Besides them, there was only one other man who brooded over the incident – and that man was George Wickham. Unbeknown to Darcy, he had witnessed the entire scene from where he was sat in the corner of the inn, and he alone amongst all the other men gathered there knew how rare it was to see Darcy lose his temper. Wickham sipped his drink thoughtfully as he speculated on what he had just observed – and he silently contemplated over how he could use such knowledge to his own advantage.

  *****

  Still feeling agitated by the incident at the inn, and more than a little anxious about the welfare of the Bennet sisters, Darcy decided to pay a call at Longbourn on his way back to Netherfield Hall. He did not tell Charles of his intention, nor invite him to join him, for he felt that he needed some time alone to mull over his actions. Besides, he grew weary of Charles’ excited chatter over the whole altercation, and he was concerned that his friend might inadvertently reveal to the Bennet ladies what had just transpired. He knew that Charles had been impressed by the swift retribution that he had delivered to the men at the inn, though in contrast to Charles, he didn’t feel like celebrating. He wasn’t proud of what he had done, but his fury continued to simmer within him, and thus he knew that he would not be good company that afternoon.

  Indeed, for a while Darcy simply exercised his horse and galloped hard across the fields as he tried to drive away some of the anger which continued to smoulder within him. He found himself questioning his own actions and wondering if he should have handled the situation differently. He could not help but think that Elizabeth would think badly of him if she were to learn about it, for surely his incontrollable display of temper that afternoon was further proof that he was not a gentleman – and that he was not worthy of her esteem. But despite these depressing thoughts, he still could not regret silencing the officers’ vile chatter, and he knew in all honesty that he would act in just the same way if he ever heard such outrageous insults about the Bennet ladies again.

  He realised that in the week since he had returned to Hertfordshire, he had grown to feel quite protective over the Bennet family as a whole. There weren’t many people who could best Darcy intellectually, but he acknowledged that Mr Bennet was one of those people. He recognised that he had become very fond of the older gentleman over the space of the last few days; he had enjoyed their conversations and their easy banter, and he liked the way that Mr Bennet was not intimidated by him, nor afraid to offer his own – very forthright – opinions. The older man had a cynical outlook upon the world that was not unlike his own, and Darcy had found that he enjoyed being intellectually challenged whenever they disagreed over something. Darcy respected Mr Bennet’s no-nonsense approach and his shrewd judgement, and on several occasions he had found himself asking the older man for his advice. In truth, Darcy realised that he had begun to appreciate having a fatherly figure in his life again after so many years of living without his own parents.

  Of course, he could not pretend that his reasons for visiting Longbourn had been solely to see Mr Bennet. His love for Elizabeth burned as intensely as it always had, and any opportunity he could find to be in her company always presented him with mixed feelings of pleasure and pain in equal measure. Not that he had been able to talk very frequently with her, Darcy considered self-depreciatingly to himself. Often he had found himself remembering his cousin’s advice – about how he should try to smile at Elizabeth and make polite conversation with her – and he had scoffed at his own blasted ineptitude. Most of the time he was too tongue-tied to know what to say to her, and so most of his conversation when he had been in her company had instead been exchanged with her sisters. He hoped that Elizabeth had not taken his reserve towards her as an indication that he resented her, though he felt clueless as to how he should go about reassuring her on such a thoroughly awkward topic.

  Nevertheless, no matter how difficult he found conversing with Elizabeth to be, Darcy knew that he could not rest until he had assured himself that she and all her sisters were safe. The officers’ contemptible jokes had reminded him all too forcibly of how depraved some men were, and though he did not wish to discuss the incident at the inn o
penly with Elizabeth and her sisters (for he hardly felt that such a recounting would be suitable for young and innocent gentlewomen to hear), he still wanted to make sure that they were not in any danger. However, upon reaching Longbourn, he was told that the three eldest sisters were all out on various errands, and so he was obliged to swallow his anxieties over their safety for the time being and content himself instead by speaking with Mr Bennet. Feeling that the older man should know at least a little of what had transpired in the town that day, if only so he could take steps to protect his daughters, Darcy therefore gave Mr Bennet a brief recounting of the tale.

  However, Mr Bennet had never been one to worry unduly, and unfortunately Darcy (in consequence of his natural modesty) downplayed the incident so much that Mr Bennet instead teased him for being overly-anxious. “I begin to think that you are as fretful as my poor wife used to be,” Mr Bennet teased him with a wry smile. “My Agnes was always worrying herself silly over our girls, and she would never listen when I tried to tell her that all would be well.”

  Darcy grimaced and tried again to explain his concerns, but Mr Bennet simply smiled and patted Darcy’s arm in a comforting manner. “I know that you care for my girls, Mr Darcy,” the older man said, “and I am grateful for your concern. But none of my daughters will thank me if I suddenly start to impose too much control over their lives. They have always been free to wander where they will – and I am too set in my ways now to begin playing the role of an overbearing father!”

  Darcy sighed at the older man’s wilful nonchalance but was finally obliged to drop the subject. Perhaps he was being overly anxious, he considered to himself as he forced himself to relax. After all, the regiment was due to depart from Meryton on the morrow, and so there would be no more cause to be concerned after they were gone. Still, it made him uneasy to think of Elizabeth and her sisters being out alone and potentially at risk of encountering such men as those he had listened to in the inn earlier that day.

  Mr Bennet was in a talkative mood that afternoon, and having brought up the subject of his late wife, he began to reminisce about her. Darcy felt it was good for the older man to speak of his wife and of their happy memories, and so he listened patiently as Mr Bennet told him amusing stories from their past. He spoke of the early days of their marriage and of their shared joy when their daughters were born, and Darcy smiled to hear tales of Elizabeth’s exploits when she had been a little girl. “My Ages loved our girls,” continued Mr Bennet sometime later; “she would have done anything she could to make them happy.”

  Darcy saw that Mr Bennet had begun to grow drowsy; he knew that the older man had not been sleeping well ever since his wife’s death, and thus he felt that a little sleep would do him a lot of good.

  “Agnes was always telling me that she had palpitations in her chest and spasms in her side, and yet I didn’t listen,” murmured Mr Bennet sadly. “Twenty-five years we were married, and yet I never took her seriously; I always assumed that she was just being dramatic. I fear that I was a poor husband to her – but I hope she knew how much I loved her.”

  “I’m sure she did,” answered Darcy gently – though he quickly realised that Mr Bennet had not heard him, for the older man had finally drifted into sleep. Cautiously, Darcy rose from his armchair and looked around for a blanket to cover the older man with. Finding one draped across a nearby chair, he tenderly wrapped it around Mr Bennet and then quietly left the room.

  At first, Darcy thought about taking his leave from the house altogether, but on hearing Kitty and Lydia conversing in the sitting room together, he decided to join them. When he had first returned to Hertfordshire for their mother’s funeral (and, in truth, for several days afterwards), he had been in no doubt that the two girls despised him. However, he had sensed a change in their opinion of him of late, and he was keen to build on that fragile beginning. He recognised that in the past he had barely been civil to them at all; he had dismissed them as being nothing but silly little flirts, but over the last week he had begun to know them more thoroughly and to appreciate their better attributes – and he felt that they had likewise begun to see him in a better light.

  The girls were bored and unhappy, and so inevitably they had begun to squabble with one another, though they immediately stopped when Darcy knocked lightly on the door and asked if he could join them. They were both very pleased to have some company, and so Darcy sat down with them and was soon listening to all their troubles and their chatter. Though Kitty and Lydia were very different in nature and temperament to his own sister, they were still of a similar age, and thus he had some ideas as to what might interest them. He smiled to see their surprise when he took an interest in the novels they were currently reading, and he could plainly see that he had astonished them when he commented knowledgeably on the latest fashions.

  They passed near-on an hour together in this manner, talking and playing cards, and soon the girls appeared much more cheerful than they had when he had first found them. It was clear that his kindness had helped to build their trust in him, for they began to unburden themselves about their grief. They spoke about their mother and told him how much they missed her, and Darcy could not help but pity them. They were both so young to be left without their mother, and their words reminded him poignantly of the time when his own parents had passed away. He was surprised to find himself telling Kitty and Lydia a little about his own parents, and about the deep grief that he and his sister Georgiana had gone through together. He was typically such a reserved person that it felt strange to unburden himself in such a way, though he could see that his disclosure had brought them some comfort – and moreover, had impressed upon them the need to be supportive of one another through their sorrow, rather than to bicker.

  Though Elizabeth and her sisters had not returned home as yet, Darcy began to feel that he should soon depart. He had already spent near-on two hours at Longbourn, and yet he had still not been able to speak directly with the elder three Miss Bennet’s and reassure himself that they were safe. He was by nature a very private person and so he was always careful not to show too much open interest in Elizabeth; he had no wish to reveal his inner feelings until he could be certain over what hers might be, and whether she could ever be persuaded to think more highly of him. However, his concern for her welfare began to escalate the longer he remained at Longbourn and saw no sign of her return, and so finally he was obliged to ask Kitty and Lydia about their sisters’ whereabouts.

  He had assumed that Elizabeth must be with her sisters, and so he was very concerned when he heard that she had actually gone off on a different errand and was in fact out on her own. Jane and Mary, he was told, had walked off in the direction of Meryton to make some purchases and to call upon their Aunt Phillips – whilst Elizabeth had set off in the opposite direction in order to visit one of their tenants. Darcy was aware that he showed more uneasiness over this information than he would have liked to reveal to her sisters, but he simply couldn’t help it. The officers’ disgusting words were still too fresh in his mind for him to easily forget them, and he feared what their intentions might be if they were to encounter Elizabeth whilst she was out in the countryside on her own.

  Consequently, he was not half so collected as he would normally appear when Elizabeth finally returned home shortly afterwards. His agitation over her safety had been steadily building, and so when she appeared in the sitting room and cheerfully greeted him and her sisters with a blasé smile, his temper inevitably spilled over. Thus, he could not help but face her with a disapproving glower and address her more gruffly than he had intended to. “Surely you must know how imprudent it is to walk out alone, Miss Bennet,” he greeted her with a tight-lipped frown as he rose to his feet to tower over her. “I would have thought you’d have more sense than to go so far on your own; your family have been quite worried about you.”

  Elizabeth’s bright smile immediately died away in response to his criticism, and her expression grew suddenly defiant. She lifted her
chin and looked him fully in the face as she replied, as if to remind him that he had no right to chastise her. “I cannot see that it is any of your business, Mr Darcy, as to where I go and when I return,” she retorted sharply.

  Darcy blinked, feeling scorched by her retort. To his surprise, however, Kitty immediately jumped to his defence. “Lizzy!” she exclaimed in an admonishing tone; “Mr Darcy was only concerned about your welfare. You should not be so rude to him!”

  “Yes, Lizzy,” seconded Lydia forcefully, “you should not be mean to Mr Darcy, for he has been very kind to us! He has been quite worried about you whilst you have been gone.”

  Darcy shifted uneasily at Kitty and Lydia’s words, for unfortunately they revealed far more than he would have wished for Elizabeth to know. Indeed, he already regretted his intemperate behaviour and would have liked to have found a way to ease the awkwardness between them somehow – but he felt that he had already offended Elizabeth enough and he had no wish to make the situation worse. Besides, he was still too agitated with Elizabeth to know how to make things right between them, and to his pain and mortification, her words had reminded him all too forcefully of her continued aversion towards him. He was aware that he glowered at her, for he could not help but be angry with her in return, and he was aware that he was in no mood at present to attempt any sort of reconciliation. Thus, in an effort to cover his embarrassment and his agitation, all he could think of to do was to give them all an abrupt bow and quickly take his leave.

 

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