by Unknown
I was relieved. I didn’t know how to soothe her. I was grateful for the time I’d spent practising make-up techniques. They had come in handy when I needed to camouflage her bruises earlier, so we could go to the station.
It was slightly alarming that Hazel, after her bravado at Vinnie’s grave, had now dissolved into a frightened girl again. I wasn’t sure I had the strength for both of us. I stared out of the train window seeing Hazel’s sleeping reflection and my own pale expression looking back at me. I would have given anything to turn back the clock and find a way to change things. I felt so alone and for the first time in my life, truly frightened. The one thing I did know was that Hazel and I could never return to our parents’ homes again. If the police were looking for Vinnie they would probably try and find us there first. I might have been desperate to leave home, but it never occurred to me when I left that I was seeing my family for the last time.
The soothing monotony of the train wheels against the rails must have sent me to sleep because when I woke, it was morning and this time when I looked out of the window, it was at miles and miles of golden cornfields. The sunrise shone on the thin mist shrouding the town. It would soon burn off and as I looked up to the perfect, cloudless sky, it was hard to fit this picturesque scene with the horror of the previous night. I tried to clear my mind and wake up slowly, gazing at the perfection outside the window.
We needed to concentrate on making new lives for ourselves and somehow disappear. I wasn’t sure how we were going to manage it. At least, I mused, the very worst we had to deal with was over now.
I was wrong.
* * *
‘Psst, come here.’ Hazel waved me over at the café where we both worked. We’d been in Bournemouth for almost eight weeks, since earning enough money working in a café in Tenby on the Welsh coast to travel even further from Scotland.
We hadn’t spent much time getting to know the town, mainly because we wanted to save what money we still had. We knew nothing much about the area and had only chosen to come here in the first place because Hazel said she had read somewhere about there being lots of tourists – she’d thought we’d find work easily.
We liked it here, but both knew it wasn’t far enough from Vinnie’s body for us to build a new life. It was the first place someone had offered us a live-in job and not knowing how difficult it was going to be elsewhere, we took our chances.
‘What?’ I said when she called me again. ‘I’ve got an audition with one of the summer shows this afternoon.’ I carried on wiping the outside metal tables and emptying the filled plastic ashtrays into the disgusting bucket I had to carry around with me for this task.
She came closer and began straightening chairs when the owner walked past from his daily visit to the nearby guesthouse where we assumed he had a girlfriend. He was carrying a packet of his favourite cigarettes. I glanced down at the stinking bucket, waving away a waft of dank, wet ash with my hand and wondering what pleasure people got out of smoking.
‘I think I’m pregnant,’ she whispered.
I stopped what I was doing, nearly dropping the bucket. ‘Are you sure?’
She nodded, her eyes brimming with tears.
I thought back to the sickness I’d been experiencing in the mornings for the past few weeks. ‘Me, too,’ I admitted, not only to her but to myself for the first time.
‘Vinnie lives on, after all.’
Chapter Thirty-One
2018 – Oakwold, New Forest
Sera
‘I wish you’d confided in me before now,’ I said when Mum had finished speaking. ‘So, you both struggled alone. Mum, that’s awful.’ I hated to think of two girls younger than me looking for a way to cope with such a frightening situation.
Dee was ashen; she stared at me for so long it was unnerving. I wished she would say something.
‘So, Sera,’ she said finally. ‘Yet again you come out on top of things.’
I frowned. ‘How do you work that out? I’ve had problems, too..’
‘I meant about our father.’
Not this again. ‘We’re both his children, Dee.’
‘Yes, but you’re the result of a romantic, if not a little sleazy, fling. I’m the product of rape. Brilliant, not something to boast about to the grandchildren, isn’t it?’
‘Stop it!’ Mum shouted. ‘How dare you? Your mother loved you regardless of how she became pregnant. In fact,’ she said, looking like she wanted to slap Dee, ‘she probably over-compensated you for what happened.’
‘Rubbish.’ Dee slammed her palm down on the table making the plates we’d used earlier rattle. ‘Every time she looked at my face she must have seen the man who raped her.’
‘That’s not Mum’s fault,’ Leo said. ‘She always favoured you over me, and you know it.’
I pictured Dee’s room with the pretty decorations and little touches making it so much better than any of her friends’. ‘They’re right, Dee,’ I said. ‘Whatever you choose to believe, Hazel did adore you and was always trying to show you in small ways.’ I wasn’t sure why I was trying to be so nice to her. I decided to try a different approach. ‘Surely the point we should both remember is that our mums could have chosen to get rid of us.’
I gave Mum a sideways glance. I was saying this for her benefit as much as Dee’s. ‘I’m sure it would have been much easier for them to make new lives for themselves if they hadn’t had babies to consider.’ She didn’t argue, so I added, ‘Hazel managed to give you a magical childhood, at least up to that summer when it all changed. Maybe you should focus on that aspect of your life rather than the negatives that happened since.’
We stared at each other. Sisters; enemies.
‘Maybe,’ she said, her tone almost threatening. ‘But you have no idea what happened after that night, do you?’
No, I didn’t. ‘I know about your ex, but no, not about anything else.’ I didn’t bother to remind her that my life hadn’t been so perfect either, but this wasn’t a competition to see who had dealt with the most misery. ‘Look, do what you want, but don’t bring your nastiness to this house.’
‘Or you’ll what?’ Leo said, standing slowly until he reached his full six feet plus. He loomed over the table. I went to retaliate, but was too drained to care what he might do to me if I did stand up to him. Before I uttered a word, the doorbell rang.
Leo looked at his watch. ‘Who the hell is that, it’s nearly nine o’clock?’
Making the most of his distraction, I leapt up and ran past him up the steps, into the back door and through the hallway, with him thundering after me. ‘Leave that fucking door closed,’ he bellowed.
My heart raced. I reached out, grabbing the doorknob with one hand and the key with the other, turning both simultaneously, pulling the door back. ‘Henri,’ I almost wept with relief.
His eyes widened to see me as I almost catapulted myself into him. He wrapped his arms protectively around me. I looked over my shoulder at the furious man bearing down on him. ‘It’s okay, Sera. I’m here,’ he whispered, like a soothing kiss. He turned with me, so that he was between me and Leo. ‘So, you bully women?’
Leo stood inches in front of Henri, glaring at him, his breathing heavy, as if more in temper than an exerted effort to catch me. ‘Get out of this house, this has nothing to do with you.’
‘No. This I will not do, unless Sera or her mother instructs it of me.’
Leo laughed, hands on his hips, head thrown back. ‘Seriously? You think you can tell me what to do? You’re a pathetic excuse for a man.’ He pushed Henri’s damaged right shoulder, hard. ‘You’re only half a man, look at you.’
My instincts told me that to defend Henri would be the worst thing I could do, so I said nothing.
Henri tensed. ‘This half-man, as you say, will knock you down if you push me one more time.’ Henri reached back with one hand and found mine, giving it a brief squeeze to assure me everything was fine. I didn’t know how much of this was bravado; I’d seen Henri
struggle to run some days, but he was fit, and working on that farm must have gone some way to building his strength back up since his accident.
Mum came out to the hallway, closely followed by Dee. ‘Henri,’ she said, relief filling her voice. ‘I want you to take Sera and Katie to your farm for the night, while I sort things out with Dee and Leo. I’m afraid there’s been a few misunderstandings.’
‘She’s not going anywhere,’ Leo said. ‘Sera, get back into this house.’
My blood coursed rapidly through my veins, not with fright, but with fury. ‘Shut up, Leo. I don’t know who you think you are, but in my house, you’re nobody. Take your sister and that poor unfortunate little girl. Better still, leave Ashley behind. I don’t mind keeping her here, but you two need to leave tonight. Go and sort through your issues somewhere else.’
‘Or you’ll do what, exactly?’ He sneered at me and I couldn’t help likening myself to Mum and how she must have been fooled into believing she was in love with Vinnie all those years ago. I’d been stupid enough to think that something of the shy little boy Leo had once been remained in this tall, handsome man. But thankfully I didn’t even like Leo, despite what I’d fooled myself into believing when he’d first arrived at my home.
‘The chances of them finding any body at the estate now are almost nil, I should imagine. The entire area has been built on for years. I’ll call the police without hesitation,’ I said. He went to say something, but I held my hand up to stop him. ‘No, don’t think you can threaten Mum with anything, she’ll deny it.’
‘She’s right, you know,’ Mum said, looking relieved.
Bolstered by him wavering, I added, ‘You, on the other hand, have a confession to make to Henri.’
‘Me?’ Henri looked at me, surprise registering on his face that I might be referring to his father’s disappearance.
I nodded, placing a hand on his shoulder. ‘Yes, we know what happened to your father.’
I addressed Leo again. ‘Jack’s body can be identified through forensics, if it hasn’t been already. He was killed at your family home and missing from the date you two and Hazel vanished. I think there’s too much evidence against you to even think you can get away with this.’
‘You mean you won’t inform the police of our involvement if we leave now?’ Dee asked, coming to stand next to her brother.
I patted Henri’s shoulder. ‘That’s up to you,’ I said. ‘You have every right to call them, if you choose.’
He slid his arm around my waist and pulled me forward to stand by his side. ‘I will decide when I have listened to what they tell me about my father’s death.’
‘Fair enough,’ Dee said, defeat in her voice. ‘You deserve to know the truth. I only wish we’d been honest years ago.’
I realised I’d been right. She had been haunted by what she’d done that night.
‘Me, too,’ Henri said. I could only imagine how much of his life had been taken up looking for and wondering where his father could be. All that frustration and confusion would never have happened if these two had told the truth about Jack’s death earlier.
I looked at Dee. ‘I’d have loved for us to become close again, but I can’t see that happening any time now. Go with Leo. Leave Ashley here with me, at least until you’ve sorted out a new life somewhere.’ She opened her mouth to argue. ‘I promise I’ll take care of her for you,’ I said. ‘I’m her auntie, after all.’
‘You want me to leave her here?’
‘Why not?’ I said. ‘She’ll be perfectly safe. You can come and get her any time. You and Leo need to sort things out quietly, you can’t do that with a child accompanying you.’
She didn’t look convinced. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and spotted Katie and Ashley holding hands at the top of the stairs, both with muzzled bed hair and eyes puffy from sleep.
‘Mummy, why is everyone cross?’ Katie asked.
‘It’s nothing. Go back to bed, sweetie, I’ll come and tuck you in soon.’
‘Ashley’s scared,’ she said.
I opened my mouth to speak, but Dee stepped forward to the bottom of the stairs and looked up at the two sleepy little girls, so like her and me when we were small.
‘Ashley, would you like to stay with Auntie Sera while Mummy finds us a new home?’
I felt a pang in my heart at her use of the words ‘Auntie Sera’ and waited for the little girl to reply. She looked terrified, then nodded slowly.
‘Okay, then. You go off to bed with Katie and I’ll come up and see you in a bit.’
I took hold of Henri’s hand and led him forward, past Leo, now quiet and deflated, and through to the kitchen. It was soothing to feel his calloused hand in mine and I gave it an appreciative squeeze. I heard them follow us into the room and motioned for Henri to sit. Mum sat down next to him. I noticed they were on the side closest to the door, so Leo and Dee had no choice but to walk around the table to get past us if they wanted to leave.
‘Right, you two have the chance to put your case to Henri.’ I let go of his hand as he sat down and stood behind him, both my hands resting on his broad shoulders. I studied my childhood friends for a while, a part of me feeling pity for what they’d gone through. ‘I’ll go and check on the children and leave you four to chat.’
I hurried up to the girls’ bedrooms, checking on Ashley first. ‘You okay?’ I asked, stroking her cheek. She nodded. ‘Katie is going to love having you to stay with her.’
She smiled. It was the first time I recalled seeing her so relaxed and childlike. ‘It’ll be fine,’ I soothed. ‘You mustn’t worry about anything.’
She didn’t take her eyes off my face while I straightened her pillows. ‘Then will my mummy come for me?’ For the first time she said enough for me to pick up on her French accent.
I nodded. ‘She will, as soon as she and Uncle Leo have found you a new home.’
Her smile faltered. ‘No, my real mummy.’
Chapter Thirty-Two
2018 – Oakwold, New Forest
Sera
‘Sorry?’ I asked, thrown by her odd question. ‘What do you mean?’
She sat up and beckoned me close, curving her hand around her mouth and whispering through it. ‘My maman, at home.’
My brain froze. She lay back down again, an expectant expression on her face, waiting for me to answer her. Her chin began to wobble. I assumed she was being open with me because she’d seen me stand up to Leo. Her face crumbled. I could see she was frightened and didn’t know what to do.
‘Hey,’ I whispered, stunned that Dee had stooped lower than I could have imagined and kidnapped a child. ‘It’s okay. I promise I won’t tell anyone what you’ve asked me.’ My mind whirled trying to make sense of this latest shock. I hoped Ashley was playing a silly game and that Dee was her mum. The alternative was too horrible to contemplate. ‘I’ll do my best to find your mummy for you, okay?’
Her panic receded a little. ‘Yes.’
I put my finger up to my mouth when I heard footsteps on the stairs. ‘Don’t say anything. Leave it to me.’
She closed her eyes. By the time Dee reached the bedroom door, I was leaving. ‘She’s fast asleep,’ I said quietly, willing her to leave the child alone.
She glanced in the room and I had to hold back a sigh of relief when she retraced her steps to join the others.
I went into Katie’s room and sat on the edge of her bed trying to make sense of my jumbled thoughts. What the hell was going on here? Who was this kid? All I knew was this little girl, whoever she might be, trusted me and I needed to ensure she was returned to her real mother.
The first thing I needed to do now that Dee and Leo had agreed to let Ashley stay with me was to get them to leave. After that I could find a way to track down the little girl’s mum. I went to the hallway outside her room. I opened the bedroom door and with my heart pounding, strained to hear any sound coming up from the kitchen. There didn’t seem to be any raised voices. I calmed down a litt
le, willing my vague seed of a plan to work.
I needed to rejoin them before they became suspicious of my absence. I listened at the kitchen door to get the gist of what was being said. That’s when I heard Leo’s voice saying, ‘I don’t see any reason for us not to leave first thing in the morning.’
I checked my watch; it was almost nine-thirty.
‘No, you will leave tonight. If, as you say, my father’s death was an accident,’ I heard Henri say. ‘And you didn’t intend to kill him, then I will allow you to leave, but only tonight. If you go now, I will take you to the station. There are trains leaving Southampton through the night. If you insist on staying, then I will call the police and have you arrested. It is your only choice.’
I could have kissed Henri for giving them very little option but to leave straight away.
‘You want us to go now?’ Dee asked.
I stepped forward and entered the room. ‘Why wait?’ I said, determined to see the back of them before Henri changed his mind, or they changed theirs. I sat down next to Henri.
Leo watched me. Did he realise that I’d discovered the truth about Ashley? Or that I’d worked out that he had only brought Dee here to hide her and Ashley away from whoever might be looking for them? He seemed to be mulling over his next move. I didn’t catch his eye, but forced a smile in Dee’s direction.
‘You don’t have to, of course.’ I hoped the reverse psychology Mum always used on me would work for her. ‘But I’d have thought you’d want to get as far away from here and the farm as soon as you could.’
The reminder of the farm seemed to do the trick. Dee grabbed hold of Leo’s sleeve. ‘She’s right, I hate it here. I have to go tonight, and if you care anything about me at all you’ll come with me.’
‘But what about Ashley?’ he asked, glancing at me. I kept my expression neutral and patted Mum’s hand for something to do.
‘The child will be perfectly fine here,’ Mum said. ‘She has Katie to play with and you can come and get her when you’re settled elsewhere.’ She caught my eye. I could see she’d picked up that I was trying to hide something. ‘Why don’t I come and help you pack, Dee? Who knows, the change of scenery might be exactly what you need.’