But it will only happen once, she assured herself. And no one need ever know. Not Reinhold, not Mother, not even my dearest friends. And once it’s done, I can forget him once and for all and concentrate on what is really important: my wedding.
“The weather?” Nicole said skeptically. “For nearly a quarter of an hour you discussed the weather.”
Evie’s smile did not waver. “I have always found the changing seasons to be a fascinating topic, haven’t you?”
Nicola’s blue eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Not particularly.”
“Well, it is over and done with,” she said with forced cheerfulness, “And now we can continue our walk in peace.” But even as she spoke the words Evie knew it was far from over and done with...and until she kissed the stranger and proved to him – and herself – there was nothing between them, she would feel little peace.
CHAPTER EIGHT
The rose gardens outside of Grosvenor Square were traditionally viewed during the day, but there was an undeniable beauty about them when seen in the moonlight. A beauty Evie hardly noticed as she slipped between the tall shrubbery guarding the delicate rose bushes and made her way to a white arbor that the late Duchess of Ardmore had requested be built in the middle of the gardens so she could paint while sitting in the shade.
A quick glance around assured Evie that she was alone which wasn’t surprising. She had picked tonight with a purpose. Nearly everyone she knew – including Merry, Nicola, and Rosalind – were at a ball on the other side of town. She had been invited as well, but had feigned a stomach ailment in order to stay home. Her mother had gone in her stead, which made sneaking out of the house far easier than Evie had been anticipating. Now that the difficult part was over, the only thing she needed to do was wait...something far easier said than done with her heart pounding in her chest and nervous energy coursing through her body, making it impossible to remain standing in one place.
Was she doing the right thing? It was a question that had been haunting her for the past two days and followed her even now as she drew back the hood of her cloak and began to follow a stone pathway that looped around the middle of the gardens in an ever-widening circle. She felt a hard tug on the hem of her dark blue skirt and stopped to untangle herself from a thorn, pricking her thumb in the process. Blood welled, staining her glove.
“Damn,” she muttered under her breath. As if she did not have enough to worry about. How was she going to explain this to her maid?
Tugging off both gloves Evie secured them in the pocket of her cloak and used her tongue to staunch the flow of blood. It tasted wet and metallic, causing her stomach to do a slow, greasy flip. She really should have eaten more for dinner but her appetite had been sorely lacking. How could she be expected to eat lamb and asparagus when she was getting ready to go kiss a man she hardly knew? A man who made her feel more alive – and confused – than Reinhold ever could. A man who sparked her temper and her desire in equal measures. A man so infuriating she could hardly stand to meet his mocking gaze...and yet at the same time couldn’t make herself walk away from him.
How was it possible her emotions were such a complicated knot after only two meetings? In all of her time with Reinhold she had never felt so much as a flicker of confusion. From the very beginning she had known precisely what he had to offer and what she was expected to give. They were a perfect fit. Everyone agreed.
But if that was really true, why was she standing here in the rose gardens at a quarter past midnight waiting for another man? Drawing her cloak more firmly around her shoulders as a shiver of anticipation raced down her spine, Evie began to slowly make her way back to the arbor.
The truth was that the stranger elicited feelings inside of her she had not even known existed. Feelings of heat and arousal and breathless need. Feelings she had never experienced with Reinhold.
Didn’t she owe it to herself to explore these new feelings? She wanted to find out what they meant and, if she were being truly honest, allow herself a taste of forbidden passion before she married a man who was right for her in so many ways...and wrong in so many others.
Blast it all. Evie’s teeth clenched as her hands rolled into fists of self-directed frustration. Why couldn’t she be content with what she had? Yet another bad trait inherited from her mother, she supposed. One that had the power to destroy everything she’d so carefully put into place.
The snap of a branch had her head jerking to the right. Although the moon was nearly full the gardens were surrounded by a wall of towering shrubbery that cast long, dark shadows across the path, making it difficult to see. Had the stranger finally arrived? The wicked part of her wished he had, even as the other part – the sensible part – wished it were nothing more than a trick of the wind.
“Hello?” Her voice was tentative. Weak. Two things Evie was definitely not. Clearing her throat, she tried again. “Are you there? If so, pray tell do not waste my time. Show yourself and let’s be done with this.”
One kiss, she thought silently. One kiss and I will have gotten what I wanted and I will never think of him ever again.
“You look stunning in the moonlight. I knew you would.” He stepped out the shadows like the devil himself. Dressed head to toe in black with his inky curls in disarray and his mouth curved in sensual smile he could have easily posed as Lucifer. Silvery light spilled over his shoulders and illuminated the rugged planes of his face, drawing Evie’s gaze to his glittering blue eyes.
“You came,” she said.
“Not yet.” His teeth flashed white in the shadows as his smile stretched into a grin. “But the night is still young.”
Oh, the man was insufferable! And yet she was still attracted to him. What, Evie wondered, did that say about her? She actually liked that he spoke his mind and didn’t think to guard his words just because she was a female. He treated her as an equal, something so few men did. To most of them she was a pretty object to be admired, complimented, and then set aside. They were never interested in hearing her opinion or engaging her in a lively discussion. Her job was to look beautiful and be quiet, the latter of which Evie had never been very successful at. Even Reinhold rarely engaged with her beyond the topics of weather and light gossip. On the few occasions she had attempted to get him to treat her as more than a porcelain doll set up high on a shelf he’d regarded her with bemusement and asked if she was feeling a tad under the weather.
“Does your beloved betrothed know that you are here?”
“Of course not,” Evie scoffed. Did the man take her for a fool?
He lifted a dark brow. “And would the poor sap be devastated to learn the truth?”
She opened her mouth to reply, only to hesitate at the last second. Would Reinhold be upset? For some reason she doubted it. The last time she had flirted with another man in a vain attempt to incite his jealousy he hadn’t noticed at all. Or if he had, he hadn’t shown any signs of caring.
“What he doesn’t know will not hurt him,” she said finally.
“So you say.” He prowled a step closer, his movements as stealthy and sinuous as a jungle cat. “But if you were mine,” he said, his voice a silky whisper that lifted the tiny hairs on the nape of her neck, “and I found out you were sneaking off to kiss another man I would find him and I would rip him limb from bloody limb.”
“Is that – is that so.” Her voice caught as a shiver coursed down her spine. She should have found such raw violence disgusting, but instead she found it to be rather arousing in a primitive sort of way.
“It is.” His white-hot gaze never left hers as he closed the final gap of distance between them and raised his hand to her cheek. She flinched, but did not pull back, when he traced the sharp edge of her jaw with the pad of his thumb. “I do not share what is mine, Red. You’d do well to remember that.”
Her eyes narrowed at the implication. “How fortunate then that I do not belong to you.”
“Not yet,” he said cryptically before his hand slipped to her collarbone.
“For a woman so strong, you feel as delicate as a dove.”
No one had ever called her strong before. Goose pimples broke out on her flesh as he slowly untied the laces holding the front of her cloak together. When they were undone the cloak slipped silently from her shoulders and pooled at her feet, exposing her shoulders and the top of her breasts to the moonlight. She knew she should have pulled back. After all, she had only agreed to a single kiss and this already went far beyond that. But her arms wouldn’t move and neither would her legs. Caught somewhere between what her heart desired and what her head wanted she was completely paralyzed.
“Stunning,” he repeated, his voice ragged as his gaze dipped down before lifting back up to her face. Evie bit her lip.
“This is a horrible idea,” she whispered. “I never should have come here.”
“No,” he agreed. “You really shouldn’t have.” And then he lowered his head and claimed her mouth with his own...
CHAPTER NINE
The explosion of heat caught Evie completely but surprised. Having been kissed before, she thought she knew what to expect. But this...this wasn’t kissing. This was devouring. And she was loving every sinful second of it.
Reinhold had always been so careful and gentle when he touched her, as though he thought she was made of glass. But the stranger was neither careful nor gentle and she relished the power she felt vibrating through his body as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding along the seam of her lips before plunging inside.
Startled by the intimate contact her eyes flew open, only to close again when she realized the pleasure one could gain from having a tongue inside of one’s mouth. She felt hands in her hair, fingers roughly sinking into her tidy coiffure and tearing it asunder. Her entire body pulsed with arousal as she was flooded with a myriad of sensations and feelings, each one more unfamiliar than the last but none of them unwanted for this was what she had been craving. And this was what she was missing with Reinhold.
Fiery passion.
Senseless need.
Breathless yearning.
When he drew her bottom lip between his teeth and delivered a painful nip she stiffened and hissed out a breath, a breath that turned to a moan when he soothed the bite with teasing flick of his tongue. She moaned again when he slid his mouth to the sensitive curve of her ear and gave a slow, tantalizing lick along the curved edge.
Pressure began to build inside of her. The sort of pressure she had never felt before. Digging her nails into the stranger’s broad shoulders she met it wave for tumultuous wave, eager to taste more, to feel more, to take more.
Fueled by ardor and pure instinct she scraped her teeth against his bristled jaw and was delighted when she felt his stomach muscles clench in response. When she did it again he growled like a feral animal and suddenly his hands were on her breasts and his thumbs were flicking across her nipples and the heat she had felt before was nothing compared to this.
It hit her like a wall of fire, sending her head lolling back in mindless pleasure as her bodice was yanked down and he replaced his hands with his mouth. She clutched his hair, fingers tangling in the silky black strands as he fawned over one breast and then the other, bringing the wave inside of her soaring to brand new heights.
And then as quickly as it had begun it was all over. He lifted his mouth from her nipple with a wet suckling sound and staggered back, raking one hand down his face and the other through his hair.
“Hell,” he muttered, sounding every bit as dazed as Evie felt. “Bloody hell in a hand basket.”
“That was...not what I was expecting,” she admitted hesitantly.
He gave her an incredulous look. “And you think I was?”
Still feeling rather weak in the knees, Evie busied herself by pulling her bodice into place and picking up her cloak from the ground. Shaking off the leaves and dirt, she swung it around her shoulders and retied it with trembling hands. There was little that could be done to her hair, so she simply covered the evidence of their passionate kiss but drawing up the hood of her cloak. “I should go.”
His blue eyes flashed with anger. “To hell with that, Red. You are not going anywhere until we figure this out.”
Although her thoughts were a jumbled mess and her body felt as though it were a harp string that had been drawn too tight, Evie did her best to keep a level tone. “There is nothing to figure out. We kissed. It was – it was a mistake. A mistake that will never happen again.”
“A mistake? Drinking too much gin and punching the wrong bloomer in the face is a mistake. Forgetting your mother’s birthday is a mistake. Losing a winning hand because you got distracted by a fine pair of tits is a mistake.” His lips peeled back in a smile that was half leer, half grimace. “That kiss wasn’t a mistake and I’ll be damned if I let you call it as much.”
“Fine. Fine!” To Evie’s surprise – and to his – she threw up both her hands in frustrated defeat. “Maybe it wasn’t a mistake. Maybe it was the most alive I have ever felt in my entire life. But that doesn’t make it right, and it doesn’t mean it can happen again.”
“Why not?” he challenged. “Just why the hell not, Red? For sure that kiss was hotter than any I’ve ever felt, and as I’ve tupped my fair share of women that’s saying something. Who’s to say we’re not meant to be together, you and I?”
With a groan Evie plastered her hand to her forehead. “Everyone!”
His eyes narrowed. “Every one of your fancy friends, you mean.”
“No. Yes. Oh, I don’t know!”
“Well I do.” He reached for both of her arms and pulled her in tight against his firm chest. She could feel his accelerated heartbeat through his coat. Gazing down into her wide, bewildered gaze he said, “I felt something from the first moment you bashed me in the head with that bloody reticule of yours and I know you felt something too.”
“Annoyance and disgust?” she ventured.
He chuckled. “You’re a spitfire, Red. I think that is what I love the most about you.”
Evie sucked in a startled breath as her heart gave a hard lurch inside of her chest.
Love.
He had said love.
She could tell the admission had caught him as off guard as it had her for his entire countenance darkened into a scowl before he abruptly released her and turned away, giving her a view of his hardened profile.
“That is not what I meant.”
“I know it isn’t,” she said. How could it be? They hardly knew one another. Why, she still didn’t even know his name! And aside for their instant chemistry and their penchant for arguing they had absolutely nothing in common. He was a rough-cut workingman. She was a refined lady. He went to dingy pubs. She went to elaborate balls. Their friends did not frequent the same social circles. If she had not bumped into him that day on the street, they never would have met, let alone kissed in the moonlight. She gathered her skirts, pulling the hem off the ground. “I should be going. It is late and I do not–”
“Want to be caught with someone so embarrassingly beneath your station?” he finished for her.
Evie scowled. “That is not what I was going to say.”
“But it’s what you were thinking, isn’t it?” Gone was his easygoing, devil-may-care demeanor. In its place was something darker. Something hard. Something almost sinister in nature. When he turned his head to look at her his blue eyes were as cold as ice. “If I were a duke or an earl or a wealthy entrepreneur you’d be singing a different tune, I wager.”
“Do not presume to know what I am thinking.” Beneath her cloak Evie’s shoulders stiffened and drew back. “You don’t know anything about me.”
“No?” One dark brow lifted mockingly. “I know you’re engaged to an earl who does not make you feel half as much as I do.”
“You have no idea what Lord Reinhold does or does not make me feel!”
“Oh, I think I do.” His smile glittered white in the darkness as he stepped towards her. “You see, if he gave you even half of
what you are so desperately looking for you wouldn’t be here with me.”
Her throat tightened as his words hit perilously close to home. “And what is it you think I am so desperately searching for?”
“Acceptance. Passion. Love.” With every word he closed the distance between them until once more they were standing chest to chest, hip to hip, thigh to thigh. Evie swallowed with difficulty. She wasn’t used to someone looking at her...and actually seeing her for who she was. Everyone focused so much on her physical beauty and sarcastic wit they never thought to look past to the woman hiding beneath. The woman who secretly craved everything he had just spoken aloud.
Acceptance...passion...love. Deep down, that was all she really wanted. And everything she feared she would never get, at least not from Reinhold.
It does not matter, she told herself firmly. He will give you other things. Things this – this stranger could never provide. The two do not even compare.
“That – that is ridiculous.” Mustering what little strength she still possessed after being kissed senseless and stripped bare, Evie lifted her chin a notch. “This has all been one enormous mistake. I see that now. I never should have asked you to meet me here. Maybe...maybe I was looking for something, but I am not going to find it with you.”
“That’s where you are wrong, Red,” he said softly. “I’m the only one you are going to find it with. Leave your fiancé. You don’t love him. You know that you don’t. What we have may not make sense, but at least it’s real.”
“Leave Reinhold? Ridiculous,” she scoffed even as part of her jumped at the suggestion. He was right. She didn’t love Reinhold. And he didn’t love her. Not really. But he was the only ship she had to cross shark-infested waters. Did she dare leap off and hope someone she hardly knew would catch her?
He clasped her face, thumbs settling into the tiny groves on either side of her mouth. “Leave him,” he repeated. “I know what I am asking, just as I know what you will be giving up.”
A Most Inconvenient Love Page 5