She sniffed and blotted her tears. A funeral service for three family members on the same day was unimaginable. But that’s exactly what would happen tomorrow. The caskets of her father, brother, and brother-in-law had been placed in this room for the viewing that had occurred a few hours ago.
Nothing about today seemed real, and tomorrow would be worse. Relatives and friends from their community as well as other areas would be here for the funeral service and to say their final goodbyes. People would speak kind words and offer comfort, but nothing in the King family would ever be the same. When that semitruck hit her father’s buggy, three men’s lives had been snuffed out. Dad’s horse had also been killed, but the animal could be replaced. No one could replace Dad, Abe, or Toby. And nobody but God could heal the rest of the family’s broken hearts as they continued living without their loved ones.
Amy swiped again at the tears rolling down her cheeks. Poor Sylvia. She’s taken her husband’s death so hard, I don’t know how she’s ever going to cope. With two small children to raise and no financial support, she’ll have no choice but to move in with us.
During the last three days, Amy’s older sister had spent most of her time tucked away in her room, hardly eating or talking to anyone. Sylvia’s children were too young to grasp the reality of the tragedy, which in some ways made the situation that much more difficult.
Amy struggled to accept and deal with the tragedy that had befallen her family. She continued to stand in the living room, contemplating whether to go out to the mailbox. After what had happened, it was hard to go out there. The sight of a semitruck passing their place caused her to relive the accident, and she dreaded going anywhere in the buggy. Thankfully, their friends had offered meals as well as comforting words, so she could avoid making a trip to the store for now.
Caw! Caw! Caw! A crow calling from the yard sent chills up Amy’s spine, and she glanced toward the window. She had never been one to believe in superstitions or omens but couldn’t help thinking about the crow she’d spotted in the yard three days ago, before their company arrived for Mom’s birthday party. Had the black bird with its raucous-sounding cry tried to warn them of impending doom?
Amy shivered and rubbed her arms. It wasn’t cold in the house, yet she felt chilled to the bone.
Maybe it’s warm, but I don’t feel it because my body and soul have been numb ever since that horrible accident took away three important men from our family.
“It’s hard to believe they’re gone, isn’t it?” Ezekiel’s deep voice drove Amy’s thoughts aside.
She blinked. “How long have you been standing here?”
“Just came into the room a moment ago.” He glanced in Henry’s direction. “Let’s go sit with him.”
Amy followed Ezekiel over to the sofa, but Henry remained quiet as he scooted over, barely glancing at them.
“I keep wishing I was caught in the middle of a nightmare and would wake tomorrow morning and find out Dad, Abe, and Toby are still here and everything’s as it should be.”
“I know.” Ezekiel groaned. “If only Dad hadn’t been so determined to go for ice cream. If the three of them had just stayed home….” His voice trailed off. “Guess there’s no point in rehashing all of this. We can’t bring ’em back by wishing.”
“That’s for sure.” Henry’s voice sounded strained.
“No, but if we could, I’d wish upon a star, toss a penny in a wishing well, and put candles in Mom’s birthday cake that none of us ate, and then make a mighty big wish.” Ezekiel slipped one arm around Amy’s shoulder and the other around Henry’s. It was a comfort to have her big brother here and know he would take care of them. She felt certain that under the circumstances, Ezekiel and Michelle would move back to Strasburg to help in the greenhouse and offer emotional support to her, Mom, Sylvia, and Henry during this most difficult time. Of course, Ezekiel’s grieving too, she reminded herself. He’s bound to realize that his place is here with us now, not in Clymer, New York.
Ezekiel turned toward Amy with glassy eyes. “We need to get the funeral behind us and let things settle down a bit before we talk about plans for the future and let you in on what Michelle and I have decided.”
“What’s that?”
“Jah, what’s your idea?” Henry leaned forward.
“Okay, guess I’ll tell you now rather than waiting. I’m going to give up my business and sell our home so we can move back here and help run the greenhouse.” Ezekiel’s hands and arms hung limp at his sides. “It’s either that or Mom will have to sell this place and you’ll all have to move to Clymer to be with us.”
“I don’t wanna move.” Henry shook his head. “Let’s not talk about this right now.”
“I don’t think Mom will go for that idea, Ezekiel. She was born and raised in Strasburg, and this is her home.” Amy motioned toward the window, where the crow still carried on. “Besides, she enjoys working in the greenhouse and would not want to sit around while you try to support us all financially.”
“I wouldn’t be carrying the whole load. Mom would have money from the sale of this home and the greenhouse.”
Amy rose from the couch and shook her head. “Your house isn’t big enough for all of us. The best thing would be for you to sell your place and move back here.”
“Nobody is selling or moving anywhere.”
Amy whirled around when Mom stepped into the room. “You heard our conversation?”
Mom gave a quick nod. Her pained expression and unsteady voice said it all. “This is not the time to be discussing our future, but since the topic has been brought up, you may as well know that I am not going to sell my home or the greenhouse your daed and I worked so hard to establish and keep going.” She pointed a trembling finger at Ezekiel. “As far as you and your family moving back here, that’s not going to happen either.”
He touched the base of his neck as deep wrinkles formed across his forehead. “Why not, Mom? You can’t run the business by yourself, and it’s only logical for me to …”
Tears sprang into Mom’s eyes, and she dabbed at them with the handkerchief in her hand. “It’s not logical at all, Son. You’ve made a new life for yourself there in New York, and you’re happy making bee supplies.” Mom kept her gaze fixed on Ezekiel as she spoke in short, strong sentences. “You were never happy working in the greenhouse. You found satisfaction in working with the bees and selling honey.” She paused. “Amy, Sylvia, and Henry will be here to help, so let’s not talk about this anymore.”
When Mom moved to stand beside Dad’s casket, Ezekiel shrugged his broad shoulders and shuffled out of the room.
Henry got up and joined Mom. He stayed there a few minutes then turned aside. “I’m goin’ out to the barn and check on the horse. It’s feeding time anyways. The mare seems to be missing Dad’s horse that died.”
“I’m sure she is lonely out there all by herself and also with none of us using her for several days. Your daed and I …” Mom choked up, looking back at Dad’s coffin. “We bought those two horses at the same time. It’s been almost ten years ago now.” Using her handkerchief, she blew her nose.
“I’ll go get on my shoes and take care of the horse now. Maybe I’ll even do some brushing while she eats.” Henry’s bare feet padded across the floor to the hallway, where he disappeared.
Amy was tempted to try and talk some sense into her mother, but it would be better to wait a few days for that. She felt certain that Mom was riding an emotional roller coaster right now, which made sense under the circumstances. So instead of voicing her thoughts, Amy walked up to Mom and slipped an arm around her waist.
No words were spoken between them, but she could almost read her mother’s thoughts. Mom was wishing that she could ask Dad what to do. As head of the house, he’d been the one to make final decisions. Now Mom felt that the burden of providing for the family fell on her slender shoulders. Well, that wouldn’t be fair, and Amy was not going to let it happen. If she had any say in this at all, she
’d do all she could to talk her determined mother into letting Ezekiel move back home. At a time like this, living close by the family was exactly where he belonged. If she could not get through to Mom, the burden of helping to run the greenhouse would fall on Amy. Mom had made many sacrifices for her children over the years, so taking charge of the greenhouse was the least Amy could do.
Belinda took little comfort in Amy’s presence. Truth was, she preferred to be alone as she stared at her husband’s lifeless form.
Oh Vernon, I miss you so much. How can I go on without you? If only you could tell me what to do about the greenhouse. She touched the side of the casket. Ezekiel thinks I should either sell it and move to New York or allow him to move back here and run the business. I don’t want to move, and I don’t want him to give up what he has there. The question is, Do I have enough strength and wisdom to run the greenhouse without you? Will our children who live here be willing to help?
Her gaze came to rest on Toby’s coffin. Sylvia’s in a bad way right now and probably won’t be up to helping for some time, if at all. Even if she felt able, what about her kinner? Who’s going to take care of them while their mother is busy working? It wouldn’t be practical to bring them out to the greenhouse during business hours. It would be a distraction for Sylvia and most likely the customers too.
She looked at the casket where her son lay and blinked back the stinging tears almost clouding her vision. Abe had a girlfriend, and they’d been talking about marriage. But now Sue Ellen had no future with him.
And I’ve lost one of my kinner so dear to me. Belinda pressed her lips tightly together. It was hard to accept that even one of these special men were gone, let alone all three. She lowered her head. If only they had listened to me and not left the house for something as unimportant as ice cream.
“Mom, we’re going to make it through this; I promise you that.” Amy’s sweet voice broke through Belinda’s troubling thoughts.
She swallowed hard, nearly choking on the sob in her throat. “Jah, we need to believe that God will be with us every step of the way.”
Weeping continued as Sylvia spoke above a whisper. “How can I be of any help to myself or anyone else without Toby?” Nothing seemed right with her husband, father, and brother gone. Less than a week ago, everything was perfectly fine, but today, like yesterday and the day before, was too painful to bear.
Sylvia lay in a fetal position on her bed in the room that used to be hers before she married Toby and left home. Her two children lay next to her, oblivious to the fact that their father, uncle, and grandfather had died. All Sylvia had told Allen was that these three special men had gone to heaven to live with Jesus. At his young age, she wasn’t sure how much he comprehended. Baby Rachel was too little to understand anything at all about this sad situation. Poor little girl would never have any recollections of her daddy. As time moved on, Allen quite likely would not remember Toby either.
Tears slipped from Sylvia’s eyes and rolled down her hot cheeks. Oh Lord, how could You have taken my dear husband from me? Don’t You know or even care how very much I loved and needed Toby?
Ever since they’d been given the grave news that Toby, Dad, and Abe had died in the accident, Sylvia had barely been able to function. She couldn’t imagine trying to get through the funeral service tomorrow.
I didn’t just lose my precious husband either. Sylvia moaned and covered her mouth with her hand when both little ones began to stir. I lost my daed and oldest brieder all at the same time. Oh, how could God be so cruel?
Sylvia’s conscience pricked. She wasn’t the only one hurting right now. Mom had lost a husband and a son. She couldn’t imagine how hurt her mother must be from losing those who’d been so dear to her. She and Dad had been married a good many years. Sylvia hadn’t been with Toby nearly as long, yet she felt broken to the core.
Sylvia looked at her sweet, sleeping children. I don’t know how anyone gets through losing their child. I can’t imagine how I’d feel if one of my precious little ones were taken from me. She rolled over onto her back and reached out to touch each of her children. Lord, please protect them.
Sylvia’s mind wandered as she thought about her siblings. Amy, Ezekiel, and Henry had also lost three people they cared about. And of course Toby’s parents had lost their only son. They, along with Toby’s three sisters, had been devastated and were struggling to deal with their loss.
If only the men had listened to Mom and been satisfied with just cake for dessert, they’d be here with us right now, and none of us would be grieving. Mom would be enjoying her birthday presents—none of which she opened—and Ezekiel and Michelle would be on their way home after a satisfying, enjoyable visit with our family.
Sylvia sniffed and swiped at the fresh onset of tears that had escaped under her lashes. I don’t know how I’m going to provide for or do right by my children. Nothing in my life will ever be the same.
As Belinda stood at the kitchen window, her knuckles turned white while she held on to the rim of the sink, watching Amy and Henry’s rigid forms in the yard. Their raised voices and body language alerted her to the fact that an argument had ensued. She couldn’t imagine what their disagreement might be about.
My children should be getting along better than this especially now, when we ought to all be pulling together. Her eyes closed tight. Oh Husband, how I am missing you. My heart feels as though it’s been torn asunder.
Things were different now, dealing with everyday life—even something simple like her kids not getting along. Belinda couldn’t talk things over with Vernon anymore or be consoled by him when things went wrong. All she had now were friends and family to offer support. And the news that the investigation had found her loved ones had truly died in an accident—the semi driver had been blinded by the setting sun—hadn’t provided any comfort.
Belinda wanted to be strong for her family, but it took a lot of energy to keep it going. She hadn’t a clue how to work through losing three people so dear to her. She couldn’t think of another person in their community who’d dealt with anything like this. It was true that some had lost a family member because of an accident, but not three—maybe in other Amish communities, but not here. Theirs was the first that she knew of.
Yesterday during the funeral, graveside service, and even the meal afterward, Henry had barely spoken to anyone. She understood his grief, but shutting oneself off and refusing to communicate with anyone would not help the grieving process. Belinda felt it best to talk about her feelings—reflect on the love she felt for all three men who’d been buried yesterday and let the tears flow.
With everything else on her mind, Belinda was most worried about her fifteen-year-old son. He hadn’t been to school since the accident but would start back Monday morning. She hoped he could deal with things well enough to get through the next couple of weeks leading up to his graduation, after having completed his required eight grades.
Maybe I should go out there and find out what’s going on between Henry and his sister. The last thing we need is for them to be at odds with one another.
Belinda moved away from the window and went out the back door. Stepping between her son and daughter, she placed a hand on each of their shoulders. “What’s going on? From what I saw out the window, it appeared as if you two were quarreling.”
With furrowed brows, Amy turned to look at her. “I just asked him a simple question, but he refused to answer. Then when I asked again, he snapped at me.”
“Everyone’s emotions are high right now.” Belinda spoke softly. “We need to be patient with each other.” She patted her son’s shoulder. “This is a difficult time for all of us, but with God’s help, we’ll get through it.”
Henry shrugged her hand away. “Where was God when he took Dad, Abe, and Toby from us? He could have prevented that accident.” Before Belinda could form a response, Henry ran off toward the barn.
A lump formed in her throat, and she swallowed hard, trying not to break down
. Tears were cleansing, but she wouldn’t give in to them at the moment. Belinda had to be strong for the rest of the family. She felt sure that was what Vernon would want her to do.
Amy came alongside her mother and slipped an arm around her waist. “Ezekiel asked me to talk to you about him and Michelle moving back to Strasburg.”
“Forever more! Why doesn’t your bruder talk to me himself instead of sending you to speak on his behalf?” Mom cheeks darkened.
Amy cringed. She’d figured it wouldn’t go over well if she tried to play go-between, but she hadn’t wanted to deny his request. “I guess Ezekiel assumed since he’d already brought up the subject and his idea was rejected, you might change your mind if I mentioned it and—”
“And tried to talk some sense into me?” The ties on Mom’s white, heart-shaped kapp swished back and forth as she shook her head forcefully. “When he brought up the subject to me again last night, I thought I’d made it perfectly clear that I don’t want him making such a sacrifice—especially since he was recently chosen by lots to take the place of a deceased minister in their church district.”
“What? This is the first I knew of this happening. How long ago did it occur, and why didn’t he say something sooner?”
“I’m not certain, but I assume he didn’t want us to know because it would be one more reason I would use to try to talk him out of moving back here to help in the greenhouse—which is exactly what I did last night.”
“Did you get anywhere?”
Mom shook her head. “He said he was tired and headed for the guest room before I could say another word.”
“Wow! I’m stunned by this news. I never imagined that my big brother would become a minister.” Amy’s thoughts swirled so quickly it was hard to follow them.
“It’s an honor to be chosen, although it means a lot of responsibility in addition to Ezekiel’s full-time job.” Mom pursed her lips as she clasped Amy’s arm. “I can’t, and won’t, ask him to leave his home in New York and move back here. Can you help me run the greenhouse until Sylvia’s up to helping?”
The Crow’s Call: Amish Greenhouse Mystery Book 1 Page 2