Starburst

by Jettie Woodruff

  “I don’t need you to tell me when I need to take a shower,” she snapped.

  “Apparently you do. When was the last time you ate? You haven’t eaten enough to keep a bird alive, now get up, and I will be back in thirty minutes. Get dressed you are going with me to watch some auditions.”

  “Like hell I am,” she protested.

  “It’s not up for discussion, now get up.”

  Fletcher left, letting the door slam a little too hard when he did, causing Alley to jump. She sat up and pulled the pendant apart and looked at the pictures. She had left Trevas nine voicemails and even more text messages, but he wasn’t responding and she didn’t understand it. How could he just walk away like she was nothing? Why was this easier for him than it was her? Would he ever talk to her again? Would she ever see him again? She had so many things going through her mind, so many memories that wouldn’t stop, and he was treating her as if she never existed. She sat there for ten minutes and pulled the two magnets apart, letting the attraction snap the two pieces back together over and over.

  She jumped up like she had remembered something, took the bowl from her army green backpack and packed it with the little bit of weed that she had left. She walked out to her balcony, smoked the bowl and then took a shower. She dressed and met her dad downstairs, reluctantly.

  She wore a pair of camouflaged shorts that came past her knees, a black t-shirt that fit tight and showed her midsection and of course the prize winning combat boots, and her dad could only shake his head at her attire.

  Trevas was in no better shape by the third day either. He hadn’t shaved and was barely eating himself. He still wasn’t taking calls and ignored them all, including the hardest one of all.

  Fletcher and Alley got into it again in the backseat of the SUV because she didn’t want to sit through his stupid auditions.

  “Why are you doing this anyway, isn’t this the casting directors job?” she asked.

  “It won’t take long Alley, these are call backs, and there are only five girls.”

  “What is the stupid movie?”

  “It’s from a book called ‘Handbook.’

  “Really?” she asked intrigued, which got a look of hope from Fletcher. “Handbook, by Tabitha Long?”

  “Yeah, you know it?” he asked, and was glad that they were speaking. She looked a lot better with clean hair and a little makeup to cover the dark circles, but she was still bothered by something and he could tell.

  “Yeah totally, I love that book. I have read it like three times.”

  “Damn, I should have just asked you about it instead of reading it.”

  “What part of the auditions are you doing?” she wanted to know.

  “Um,” he thought, flipping through the script. “Christy Silks is having a conversation with a guy named milk, about coming to his youth center.”

  Alley kind of chuckled. “She is only called Christy in the first parts of the book. Once she joins the army she inherits the nick name Peanut Silks because she is so dainty and small.”

  “Why did she join the army?”

  “She grew up in a bad part of New Orleans, and her mother was a drug addict and she pretty much raised herself. When she was thirteen one of her mom’s boyfriends raped her and then another one raped her when she was fifteen. Milk caught her spray painting the side of his building and instead of calling the cops and making her pay for it. He made a deal with her that she had to come to the youth center at least three times a week. She ended up being there six and seven days a week. He taught her to fight and talked to her for hours about his years in the army, and all of the adventures that he had been on. The next time one of her mom’s boyfriends tried to rape she put him in the hospital. She enlisted her senior year and as soon as she graduated she was off to boot camp.”

  “Why did they call this guy milk?”

  “Because he was a big… very black man with the whitest teeth ever.”

  “Maybe you can help us out and give us some pointers on the best girl.”

  “I don’t know about that, but that is one of my favorite books. I will unquestionably tell you if it’s the wrong one. I wouldn’t want it screwed up because you guys can’t pick the part.”

  Fletcher kind of laughed. “I’m sure you will,” and then he lost her again when she stared out the window, looking down Garner Street. The street that if you took a left, and then a right with three more blocks would take you to Trevas’s apartment. She could feel the tears behind her eyes, and she closed them tightly, trying to stop it.

  She wondered if he was home or if he was working, and then she felt a burning in her chest, feeling once again, as though she was suffocating. “I have to go to the bathroom,” she told her dad as soon as they entered into the building.

  Alley sat on the toilet and buried her face in her hands, rocking back and forth trying her best to get a grip and not, psycho out right there, and turn back into the cocoon that she had been for the past three days right there on the bathroom floor.

  She was washing her face and patting it dry with a paper towel when Lidia, one of her dad’s co-workers came to check on her.

  “Hey kiddo, you okay in here? Your dad was getting worried.”

  “Yeah I’m fine, just got a little woozy,” she replied. She had known Lidia pretty much her whole life and wondered if she could talk to her. Maybe if, she could just tell someone and get it out, she would feel better. She stopped that notion very quickly, and knew she wouldn’t chance her telling her dad.

  There were four people sitting at the table, her dad, Gary Flowers, who she had also known her whole life. Stella Gains was an agent, sitting next to him and then Lidia the director’s assistant beside of her. Alley sat on the end next to her dad, and they talked to the first girl and explained what they were looking for. She hadn’t gotten two paragraphs out before Alley made a buzzer noise, disqualifying her.

  “Alley stop it,” her dad disciplined, turning to her slumped in the chair next to him. She didn’t make any more noises, but laughed at the thought of this girl playing Peanut Silks.

  Once the girl had left the room they all turned to Alley and asked what she didn’t like about her. They had all thought she did a decent job and would consider her.

  “Have any of you read the book?” she asked. “That girl is like a giant. Peanut Silks had a hell of time even making it into the army. She was a small, dainty girl. She lived on Big Mac’s for three months and did everything she could to build muscle just to make the weight.”

  They all thought about it, and either crossed her name off or scratched the notes that they had been taking.

  She was no more impressed with the next girl or the next or the next and every time they would leave the room they would turn to get her opinion.

  “You had to like her,” her dad said after the fourth girl.

  “No, not at all.”

  “Why?” Gary asked, this time.

  “Peanut Silks was a hard ass. She had a tough life. That girl is way too prissy to play Peanut Silks and what the f---,” she stopped herself before saying the F word, and they all laughed. “What the heck is up with all of the smiling, and she definitely didn’t walk like that.”

  “Why don’t you show us who Peanut Silks is, little Alley,” Gary spoke, getting extremely annoyed with her, and wishing her dad would have left her at home.

  Alley gave him a death glare and almost told him where to go, but for some reason she didn’t, and she wanted to show them all who Peanut Silks was. She would be so mad if they messed up this book.

  She kicked the chair from under her and sat at the one in front of them.

  “You read Milk’s part,” she demanded to Gary. “I’m not talking to myself.”

  “Do you want a script?” he asked, flipping his to the correct pages.

  “I don’t need a script. I’ve read the book, just read, ass hole.”

  “Alley!” her dad scolded.

  “Sorry, ready when you are.”


  Gary had some sort of smart smile on his face, like he was going to enjoy this, and she wanted to get up and knock it off of him.

  “What’s your name?” he started.

  “The same as yours, leave me alone,”

  “You’re quite the artist,”

  “And you are quite irritating, what do you want?”

  “You painted up my building. We have to do something about that.”

  “Go fuck yourself, I aint doing shit for you.”

  “Well, I guess I’m just going to have the get the cops involved then,”

  “So… wouldn’t be the first time. At least they have hot food and beds,” Alley came back with everything he said with the perfect attitude and body language, without a script. Yes, none of it was word for word but she pretty much nailed it head on.

  They continued their simulation for twenty minutes and Alley stopped him. “That’s enough, you get the picture.” She wondered why they all looked so bewildered and confused, even her dad, as she went back to her seat and waited for the next girl.

  “What?” she finally asked them all staring at her like she had two heads or something.

  “Alley, you have to play this part,” Lidia, was the one to throw it out.

  Alley almost choked on her own saliva. “Whatever,” she exclaimed.

  “Alley you are that girl, you are exactly what we are looking for,” Gary begged.

  Alley was no stranger to any of this. She grew up on a set and knew exactly what it was all about and she wanted no part of it.

  “You are all crazy, forget it. I just didn’t want you to screw up the book by putting some yuppie in in it. Forget it. I’m going to get something to drink.” She got up and left the group alone.

  “Fletcher, you have got to talk her into this. Please,” Lidia begged. “She is perfect, the perfect height, the perfect weight and the attitude just comes natural for her.”

  “Lidia, you have known Alley long enough to know that Alley doesn’t do anything she doesn’t want to do. She hates the spotlight. She will never agree to this.”

  “You have to try Fletcher, we have a month, you have a month, I should say. Do this Fletcher,” she begged. “You owe it to us after sabotaging the last movie.”

  “How long are you going to hang that over my head?” he asked, exasperated at his lifelong co-pilot.

  “I’m not sure, until we see if your stupidity hurts the movie or not,” Lidia spoke the truth.

  The ride home was quiet, and Fletcher never mentioned the movie. Alley had her headphones in place and stared blankly out the window. She didn’t want to go back home. It did help getting out of the house, and she didn’t want to go back there.

  Alley went straight to her room and closed the curtain that her dad had opened. She lay on the bed with her boots still on and cried, once again in anguish. She held the pendant clinched in her hand and held her hand to her lips.

  Chapter 7

  Trevas’s day went just about as well. He wanted to do absolutely nothing and everything that he tried to do, he lost interest quickly and ended up back in the same chair. He stared into space blankly and continued to ignore the phone calls. His mother called again in the evening, and left a message that she was getting worried about him, and to please call her. He ignored that too, but she wouldn’t give it up and dialed him over and over and over until finally he couldn’t take it anymore and answered, which is what she knew or was hoping that he would do.

  “MOM… WHAT!” He yelled.

  “Trevas I have been worried sick about you. I haven’t heard a word from you for almost a week.”

  “Probably because I didn’t want to talk to you, or Anna,” he added, knowing that her and his sister had talked, and he was annoyed with all of her calls too.

  “Was it bad?” she asked, in a soft understanding, mom kind of way.

  “It was horrible mom. I can’t get the image of her placing her hand on my chest and looking up to me, saying my name, out of my head. She was so scared, and there was so much hurt in her eyes, and her unstable voice. It has haunted me for days. I am so ready to call her and tell her to meet me at the gate and just take her away. I can’t take it mom. What am I supposed to do? I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, and I can’t work. It just doesn’t stop.”

  “Have you talked to her?”

  “No, I can’t but I just wished I knew if she was okay, maybe that would help.”

  “Do you want me to call her?”

  “I don’t know. She will know that I put you up to it. I’m just so afraid that she thinks that I’m back to living my life and have forgotten all about her.”

  “Trevas I don’t know what to say. I can’t make this better for you.”

  “I know, I’ll be okay, I just need a few more days.”

  “No. You need to go back to work and get your mind on something else. I saw the pictures of her online,” she added. “She didn’t look good.”

  “What pictures?”

  “You didn’t see them?”

  “No I haven’t even turned on the computer. Oh, you mean the one where she flipped off the paparazzi?” he said, remembering their day of arrival. “She did that when we were going through the gate at her house.”

  “Yes that one and another one, where she was standing on a balcony.”

  Trevas powered on his computer while they talked. He didn’t open them up until he hung up, not sure of what his reaction would be. He told his mom that he loved her and would talk to her in a day or two. She told him if there was anything she could do, to call.

  Trevas opened the internet and typed in her name. He clicked on the first one of her flipping off the cameras, and it looked exactly how his mind pictured it. He opened up the next one, and it had been taken earlier that day, and the headline read, “Alley Fletcher, daughter of Peyton Paxton and Nicholas Fletcher, rebels against father’s recent affair with best friend, Brooke Austin.” He clicked on the picture to enlarge it and was in total disbelief. She stood on her balcony with the lighter and ivory pipe to her mouth. Her hair was down and looked like it hadn’t been washed in a month. She was wearing his t-shirt, and he couldn’t tell if she had anything on underneath or not. The shirt was long, and most of her shorts were very short. Her eyes were so puffy, and as he read through the article he realized for the first time why she hated the paparazzi so much. It was all lies and talked about her eyes being the eyes of a drug addict. They had no idea what she was going through or anything about her, and it infuriated him to no end to read what they were saying about her.

  Fletcher saw it too, when her mother called him, seeing it first. He went straight to her room, with laptop in hand. He opened the door, and she was laying in her fetal position again, and he flipped on the light. She jumped up and turned, startled.

  “What are you doing? What do you want?” she screamed.

  Fletcher was ready to fly into her until he saw her and then he couldn’t do it. “Alley, please tell me what is wrong. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”

  “I don’t need your fucking help. Why can’t you just leave me alone?”

  “Do you need help Alley? Are you into drugs?”

  Alley responded with half of a laugh. “No. I do not need help, and I’m not on drugs.”

  “Than what the hell is this?” he asked, dropping the laptop to the bed for her to see.

  She blinked away tears to see what the fuss was all about, and laughed, slamming his laptop closed. “That is the life that was chosen for me.”

  “Alley what are you smoking?” he wanted to know.

  “It’s weed and don’t worry it’s all gone. I had to do something to make it through the day with you.”

  “Alley, why are you crying?” he asked, in a more civil tone, wanting so bad to help her and not knowing what to do.

  “Don’t worry about it dad. It has nothing to do with you, so you’re off the hook, go feel guilty about something else.”

  “Alley what do you want from
me? I don’t know what to do with you.”

  “I don’t want you to do anything. I want out of this house. I want my mom!” she screamed, and decided that, that was what she really wanted. She wanted out of that house where Trevas was. Where everything she saw there, reminded her of him. She wanted to go home to her mom, but she too was too busy to be there for her.

  “I just talked to your mother. She will be home in a few days.”

  “Of course she will,” Alley snapped. She got up and shoved past him and went out and sat by the pool and now stared into the darkness.

  Fletcher left her alone and looked out periodically to her sitting in the exact same position, not moving as if she was a statue that was carved for a pool ornament. He went into his office around ten and called her mother.

  “Hi, Fletcher,” she answered and he could tell that she was at a party or a club, because of the loud music, and he was instantly pissed. She was off having a festivity of some sort and he was left to deal with their teenaged daughter.

  “When are you coming home?” he asked, in a not so pleasant tone.

  “The first part of next week, probably, why?” she asked, alarmed.

  “Are you done working?”

  “Yes, we finished up today. Why, what’s going on Fletcher?”

  “What the hell do you mean, what is going on? You are the one that called me. Didn’t you see our daughter? She has been like that for a week. I don’t know what is wrong with her, and I don’t know how to help her.”

  “What’s wrong… is her daddy was out screwing her only friend in the world,” she snapped at him.

  “Peyton, I don’t think that’s it. Something bad happened while I was gone, but she won’t talk to me.”

  “What do you mean something bad happened?”

  “I don’t know. I just know something is wrong.”

  “I think you are over reacting, and I think she is upset over your stupid little stunt.”

  “She screamed that she wanted her mom at me earlier.”

  “She did?”

  “Yes Peyton and I think you need to come home now, not in a few days.”