But as usual, Parker found a way to make sure the night wasn’t a total loss. Beth could tell from the aroma filling the room that he’d brought her back her favorites.
“I can’t believe you brought me dinner,” she murmured watching him pull the containers of fries and soup from the bag.
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“Because I was a total flake.”
Parker didn’t respond.
“I’m sorry by the way.”
“I know,” he replied.
“Thanks for the food. You ordered my favorites.”
Parker shrugged. “It’s not a big deal, I just figured you didn’t eat so . . .”
Beth’s heart felt like it was turning itself inside out. Here was Parker, a boy who knew her so well, who did unbelievably kind things for her, showing her how much he cared. And what was her boyfriend doing? Partying in a hot tub with sorority girls. Jared didn’t even have the decency to call Beth back. Why the hell was she even torn?
“Parker, it kind of is a big deal.”
He laughed softly. “Bringing you dinner is a big deal, but you won’t talk about our earth-shattering kiss? Maybe I don’t know you as well as I think.”
“No, you do know me,” Beth said. “I think I just wasn’t ready for so much earth-shattering.”
Parker smiled at her tightly. It was the kind of smile that hid his true feelings, and didn’t reach his gorgeous blue eyes. And that’s how she knew he was scared—probably just as scared as she was.
“I’m sorry I freaked out,” she admitted.
“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have reacted like I did. I mean I can’t expect you to change your life for me.”
“Park . . . that’s not what it is. It’s just . . . I don’t know.” Why the hell couldn’t she find the right words? Ten minutes ago her head had been full of an endless stream of them. But now, sitting so close to Parker, staring into his ocean blue eyes, Beth felt like she was drowning.
“It’s okay,” he said. “I decided I’m gonna stay in your uncle’s room so you can have some space to think.”
“Uncle Harold?”
“Yeah. I sat next to him at dinner. He’s got an extra bed in his room and I think it makes the most sense.”
“You don’t have to.”
Parker gave her that tight smile again. “Yeah, I do. It wasn’t fair of me to put that pressure on you, Beth. I’m really sorry.”
“Parker this isn’t your fault. I’m the one who kissed you.”
He sighed. “I think that’s what makes this so hard.”
She hung her head. “I messed everything up.”
“That’s the thing, Beth. I was already a mess. I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but I think I need to say it. Just once. Even if it doesn’t change your mind.”
Beth swallowed the lump in her throat, but nodded for Parker to continue.
He picked up her hands and began speaking. “Today I did something I’ve been dreaming about for half my life. I kissed the girl of my dreams. And she kissed me back.”
Parker took a deep breath before continuing. “Kissing you was the greatest and most terrifying few seconds of my life. And the moment you kissed me I knew why I’d waited so long. Because you broke me, Beth. You broke the wall I’d built around my heart. The wall I needed in order not to let myself want to be more than your best friend.”
He paused, squeezing her hands. “I know that things are a mess now, and I know I have no right to ask you to pick me. But I really hope you do.”
Beth tried to interrupt, but her throat was so tight it was all she could do to get his name out. “Parker . . .”
Emotion burned in his eyes. “I need you to know that I love you. And even if you don’t pick me, I’ll understand and I’ll love you anyway. Because maybe the timing isn’t right for us now, but I have faith that someday it will be. And I can live with that, because my heart was always yours to break, Beth.”
Tears streamed down Beth’s face as she stared into Parker’s beautiful broken face. His eyes spoke volumes as emotion danced in them like blue flames. Beth’s own despair mirrored in his. A part of her heart had always belonged to him. It probably always would, and it made her want to leap into his arms. But it wasn’t right. Not here, not when she was still with Jared.
“Parker, I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s okay. You don’t need to say anything. I just needed you to know how I feel.”
Parker gave her hands a final squeeze and stood up. He walked across the room collecting his things. He took off his tie and dress shirt. He looked so much more like himself in just his plain white undershirt, and somehow it made everything hurt that much worse. For a moment, he was just Parker again—her best friend, her whole world.
Parker handed his dress shirt to Beth. “Here. There’s nothing you would’ve liked at the gift shop.” Then he walked out the door.
28
Beth
Beth was curled up in her bed wearing Parker’s dress shirt when Brenna came in.
“Oh my, God. I knew it,” Brenna accused.
Beth glared at her. “Knew what?”
“Something happened between you and Parker.”
Beth tried to keep her voice from trembling as she wiped tears away to no avail. “Brenna, as usual you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“The hell I don’t. You didn’t come to dinner, Parker was on his phone the whole time and then he left early, ‘to bring you something to eat’,” she said using air quotes. “And when I get to your room I find you wearing his shirt.”
“Great detective skills, Brenna. But in case you haven’t noticed, Parker’s not here.”
“Hmm,” Brenna mused making herself comfy on Beth’s bed. “I was sure he was sneaking out for a booty call with you, but maybe it’s something even juicier.”
“Sorry to disappoint, but there’s nothing juicy going on. Parker just dropped off my dinner and let me borrow a shirt.”
“And where is Romeo now?”
“Don’t call him that. And if you must know, he’s being a gentleman and staying in Uncle Harold’s room.”
Brenna scoffed. “He didn’t look like a gentleman when I walked in here this morning. That little romp in the sheets wouldn’t have anything to do with this situation would it?” Brenna asked pointing to Beth’s puffy face.
“Brenna, there is no situation! You’re getting married in two days. Don’t you have better things to do than meddle in my life?”
“Nope.” Brenna flopped onto her stomach and faced Beth. “Listen, Beth. I say this with love, but you gotta get your head outta your ass.”
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t know what it’s gonna take for you to realize that Parker’s the guy for you, but if you don’t do it soon you’re gonna regret it.”
“Like you care?”
“Of course I care. Why the hell do you think I’m always pushing you two together?”
“Are you crazy? When you found out I liked him, you teased me until I cried. And then you kissed him!”
“Duh! I was trying to get you to make your move.”
“By kissing the guy I like?”
“You might not like my methods, but I’m not wrong, Beth. Parker’s the one. You should admit it to yourself before it’s too late. I’ve dated a lot of guys and I assure you there aren’t many like Parker. He won’t wait around forever. Trust me.”
There was a sadness in Brenna’s voice that Beth had never heard before. Of all the Bennett girls, Brenna was the toughest. She never let anything get her down. Not even when her jerk of a boyfriend abandoned her, pregnant and all. She embraced it. But that was Brenna—the world could crumble around her and she’d just keep going, unflinching.
Beth had always thought of her sister that way. But the melancholy tone in Brenna’s voice gave Beth pause. Maybe things got to Brenna more than Beth knew. It couldn’t have been easy to raise a baby on her own. Her heart must’ve been
broken when her ex left her. Really, who does that? Beth prayed that Eric the Marine was nothing like Rex the ex.
She took Brenna’s hand in an act of sisterly solidarity, and just when Beth was thinking there was more to her sister, Brenna popped up and yawned. “Well I gotta get my beauty rest if I’m gonna look better than all you bitches tomorrow.” Brenna paused and gave Beth a once over, smirking. “At least I know I got you beat.” Then she flounced from the room like she hadn’t a care in the world.
Beth flopped back on her bed. That was Brenna. The girl was like pepper spray when it came to connecting. Perhaps that was her coping mechanism—never let anyone close enough to hurt you. Beth found herself wondering if Eric knew what the hell he was in for. But as Beth closed her eyes, she couldn’t shake Brenna’s words from her mind.
Brenna’s tactics might be crazy, but what if she was right? What if all along the guy Beth was meant to be with had been standing right in front of her? Even as she formed the thought, Beth felt things shifting into place. It was like someone had finally turned on the lights and she was staring at a path she’d never noticed before. And it led to everything Beth had been searching for.
Parker
It turned out uncle Harold did snore like a horse. Parker told himself he probably wouldn’t have gotten much sleep anyway. Not when his mind was too busy overanalyzing his discussion with Beth. After a few more hours of useless tossing and turning, Parker gave up. He slipped out of bed and tiptoed onto the balcony. At least out there he could hear himself think. Harold’s snoring was sawing Parker’s nerves to pieces.
Parker took off his glasses and rubbed his tired eyes. Sadly, when he put them back on the world looked just as bleak. He felt like a jerk for stressing Beth out. This was the last thing she needed. He knew just attending one of her sister’s weddings was enough to drive Beth insane, but couple that with their confusing kiss and Jared’s antics . . . Parker exhaled deeply. He’d royally screwed up. He was supposed to be Beth’s moral support. He’d always prided himself at being there for her and knowing exactly what she needed. But as Parker stared up at the pale moon, he felt completely lost. He had no idea how to make things better.
His life had never felt so off. It was as if the world tilted and he was desperately trying to grab hold of something to keep him steady. Parker leaned his elbows on the railing and rested his head in his hands. Never in a million years had he imagined Beth would kiss him. It turned his world upside down.
Despite the constant surge of turmoil racing through his veins, Parker couldn’t help being glad that it happened. The kiss forced Parker to finally get things out in the open. And no matter the outcome, he told himself he was better off, because keeping his feelings for Beth bottled up was taking its toll. He hadn’t realized the immense weight he carried with him at all times until he’d finally let everything out. Well not everything.
He’d told Beth how he felt, but that was just the tip of the iceberg. There were a million more things he wanted to confess. But the one that was currently nagging him was his conversation with Caroline. He’d already told Beth about seeing Caroline and Jared together, and she’d blown it off. But Parker’s conversation with Caroline after the lacrosse game confirmed his suspicions. There was definitely something going on with Jared and Caroline, and Beth deserved to know.
But things were precarious between Parker and Beth right now. How could he possibly tell her about Caroline’s proposal and not come off as desperate? Parker wanted Beth to pick him over Jared. He wanted to know he was her first choice, not some consolation prize. Parker sighed. He needed to trust his gut and Beth’s heart. What other option did he have? His own heart was already in her hands—just like it had always been.
29
Beth
The next morning came too quickly and the knock at Beth’s bedroom door sent her into panic mode. It was Parker, it had to be. Even thinking his name made Beth’s insides squirm. All the emotions she’d been trying to push away came rushing back. It was too soon. She’d done nothing but cry all night and inhale the lingering scent that clung to Parker’s shirt that she still wore.
Beth thought of Brenna and everything she’d said last night. Beth did need to get her head out of her ass. Whether it was Parker or Jared, she needed to stop waiting around and start making her own decisions. She took a deep breath and smoothed her wild hair. It was one day before Brenna’s wedding. Beth and Parker would undoubtedly be thrown together for at least the rehearsal. There was no sense in putting things off. She plastered a brave smile on her face and answered the door, but it wasn’t Parker. It was a masseuse.
A woman wearing a crisp white uniform and carrying a folding massage table under her arm greeted Beth. She smiled brightly and held her hand out. “Hello, Miss Bennett. I’m Gretchen. Where would you like me to set up?”
Beth blinked at Gretchen in confusion. “Are you sure you have the right room?”
Gretchen glanced at the number on Beth’s door. “Yes, Miss Bennett.”
“I think there’s been a mistake. I didn’t order a massage.”
Gretchen smiled sweetly and handed Beth an envelope. “I’ll just set up by the French doors. The light is lovely at this hour.”
Beth barely heard Gretchen as she tore into the envelope, pulling out a note.
I hope this can make up for some of the stress I caused. – Parker
Something fluttered in Beth’s chest, and her hand absently went to her lips. An image of Parker flashed in her mind, transporting her back to the way he’d looked at her last night just before leaving. His eyes had been hungry pools of blue flames, fringed with midnight lashes. No one had ever looked at her like that before. It frightened her, but in the best way possible.
As Beth stared at Parker’s name neatly scrawled on the rich cardstock, the answer to the question she’d been asking herself all night became almost immediately clear.
Gretchen’s voice interrupted Beth’s thoughts. “Shall we begin, Miss Bennett?”
Beth smiled as she turned to face the masseuse. “Yes, I think we shall.”
Jared
Jared and Sullivan were riding a chairlift back up the mountain when Jared’s phone chimed again.
“Bro, just call her back already,” Sullivan said.
Jared felt like it was the millionth message he’d ignored. But he didn’t know what to say. All Beth’s messages were putting him on edge. He was afraid she’d somehow found out about him and Caroline. That wasn’t something he wanted to get into on a chairlift. “I’ll call her later.”
“Is everything okay with you two?” Sullivan asked.
“Yeah, why? Did she say something?”
“No, but it’s just weird that she’s not here.”
“I told you, she’s got her sister’s wedding.”
“Right, with the stand-in boyfriend.”
“His name is Parker and they’re just friends.”
Sullivan laughed. “If you say so, dude.”
“I do say so.”
“Well you’re a bigger man than me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. I’m just saying I wouldn’t let my girlfriend go to a wedding with some other dude.”
“Well I’m not you,” Jared growled.
Sullivan held his hands up in surrender. “Chill, bro. I didn’t mean anything by it. I like Beth. She’s good for you.”
Jared didn’t respond. He knew Beth was good for him. That wasn’t the problem.
Sullivan sighed. “Just tell her I gave you her message, alright?”
Jared shoved his ear buds in, signaling their conversation was over.
Sullivan had given Jared Beth’s message last night. Unfortunately, Sullivan’s timing was awful. He’d announced Beth wanted Jared to call him in front of everyone in the hot tub, prompting the guys to hassle Jared to no end. There was no way he could call Beth back without getting hazed now. Plus, Jared didn’t like the challenging look Caroline gave him w
henever she caught him glancing at his phone. She was always around and he couldn’t escape the feeling that she was waiting for him to slip up.
But Jared had no plans of messing up. He only had a few more days of spring break to get through. Then a few more weeks until graduation. If he could turn down the super hot and super drunk sorority girls that hit on him all last night, Jared was convinced he could get through anything.
After everything Jared drank last night, it was a freaking miraculous display of self-restraint that he hadn’t taken any of the flirty co-ed’s to bed. They’d been relentless in their flirtation, but luckily there was a hot tub full of lacrosse guys that happily stepped up in Jared’s place.
But that hadn’t seemed to satisfy Caroline. Jared was probably being paranoid, but he wouldn’t put it past her to have planned the tempting party girls as some sort of test of his loyalty to Beth.
Jared refused to cave. Caroline could blackmail him all she wanted. He was determined to show her that she was only doing him a favor by forcing him to enjoy a free Aspen vacation. He was playing it as cool as the freaking Rockies just to piss her off. But getting under her skin wasn’t so easy.
Caroline glanced back at Jared from the chairlift in front of him. It was like she had a sixth sense to know Jared had been thinking about her. She smiled girlishly and waved her fingers. He waved back, pretending to be unfazed. Caroline turned back to the girls on her chairlift and shared a laugh, probably at Jared’s expense.
He sighed and turned his phone off. There would be plenty of time to talk to Beth when this was all over. For now he had to play by Caroline’s rules.
Beth
Beth felt renewed after her massage. She showered and dressed in her black and white gingham maxi dress. She always felt extra girly when she wore full-length dresses. She glanced in the mirror, feeling as though she’d just stepped out of a fairytale. And maybe she had.
The Stand-In Boyfriend: A YA Contemporary Romance Novel (The Boyfriend Series Book 5) Page 16