“You drive me insane,” he growled, sliding his hand down my throat. “And even worse, I think I like it.”
“There is something wrong with you.” I gasped as his hand cupped my breast. “There’s nothing wrong with this.” He squeezed gently, causing a hot shiver to curl its way down my spine. His arm loosened around my waist, and I felt his fingers at the buttons of my blouse. There was a light tugging motion, and then the sound of buttons hitting the floor. “I hope you didn’t like this shirt.”
“I did.”
“You’ll forget about it soon enough.”
Caden was right. I did. He turned me in his arms, tugging the cups of my bra down, and the hem of my skirt up. Before I had a chance to think, his lips moved along the scar Aric had left behind, kissing the faintly pale, slightly raised skin.
And then he drew my nipple into his hot mouth. I gasped as pleasure rolled through me. His free hand slipped between my thighs, his fingers brushing over my panties before making quick work of them. I had no idea if he tore them off or if they’d simply fallen to the floor.
He lifted his head, nuzzling my neck under my ear. “I don’t think you have any idea how badly I want you.” His fingers brushed along the center of my core once more, this time with no barrier. “I can’t stop thinking about this.” One finger slipped inside, just a little. I moaned. “About how you felt around my fingers. How tight and wet. How you rode my hand.”
My entire body clenched. Hot, tight shudders racked my body. Caden’s fingers were barely in me, and I already felt like I might tip over the edge. This was insane. I was mad at him, and he was beyond frustrated with me, but this… God, this felt right, and I was so full of raw, painful need that I didn’t care what came next.
“Do you want this?” he murmured against my cheek, pressing his finger in just a little farther. “Just say the word, and I’ll make you forget everything.”
I knew I should say no. I should stop this. But I didn’t. I said, “Yes.”
Caden moved so fast, my breath got stuck. He lifted me up as if I weighed nothing, and then he was laying me down. It took a moment to realize that I was in his bedroom, on his bed, stripped bare. And then he was naked above me, his erection thick and hard.
His mouth was on mine once more, his tongue dancing with mine, and then he trailed kisses down my throat, over my breasts, and…then he kissed each of the scars on my stomach with his tongue and his lips. The silent, small act was monumental and brought tears to my eyes.
I was lost all over again, and it wasn’t just the pure seduction he wrought as his mouth made its way around my navel and then moved lower. It was him.
Lightning burst through my veins as he grasped my hips, and I felt his breath brush over where I ached the most. There was no time to feel self-conscious, to think that I’d only done this twice before, and both times I’d been so caught up in my own head and the shocking intimacy of the act that I hadn’t enjoyed myself.
There were no thoughts here.
Caden captured my flesh with his mouth, slipping in with deep, firm strokes of his tongue. I cried out, trembling as raw sensation threatened to drown me. My fingers curled in his hair as my back arched. I couldn’t move, not with the way he held my hips down. There was no escaping the blissful torture. Not that I really wanted to, not with the way the tension was building and building. Finally, it shattered. My body liquefied as I climaxed, kicking my head back as I moaned his name.
His head lifted at the sound, and through half-open eyes, I saw that his gaze was luminous. “Say it again. My name.”
“Caden,” I whispered.
Never breaking eye contact, he lowered his mouth once more, lapping at the slick moisture. I panted, my eyes widening as he lifted his head and licked his lips.
Dear God.
He climbed over me, his attention feral and possessive. Slipping an arm under my hips, he lifted me up. The fine hairs of his chest teased the sensitive peaks of my breasts. His lips claimed mine as I felt him reach between us, and then I felt his thick head pushing in. His skin felt like fire—his bare skin. Concern flared, but reality swept in. Fae couldn’t pass diseases to humans, and pregnancy was so rare that it wasn’t an issue.
I clutched his shoulders, lifting my hips as he sank in an inch and then two. Caden groaned into my mouth.
His hips flexed, and then he slid in all the way. The pressure and sudden fullness wrung a gasp from me. It had been a while, like years and years, but the bite of pain gave way to pleasure as he started to move, slowly at first, and then faster. He took me, and I didn’t realize until then how badly I wanted that from him. He pressed his lips to my temple the moment before his thrusts lost all rhythm as his hips plunged into mine. The sounds of our breathing and our wet bodies making contact surrounded us until I couldn’t hold back. Moans I didn’t even know I was capable of left me, and his answering groan was like a match to kindling. I went up in flames all over again, breaking into a thousand tiny pieces. I cried out his name over and over as he drove into me, his arm tightening around me until there was no him or me, just us. He thrust deeply, stilling as he came, shouting my name, his large body trembling with the force of his release until he collapsed, his weight shifting to one arm beside me on the bed.
His breath was ragged as he rested his forehead against my temple, and I had no idea how long we lay there. Could’ve been minutes, could’ve been hours. Finally, he slid out of me and fully onto his side. He didn’t pull away, though. With his arm around my waist, he tugged me against him so that my chest was pressed to his.
I could feel his heart pounding just as fast as mine.
The reality of what had just happened was slow to take hold as his hand slid up and down my thigh and hip. The only thing I could really focus on at first was how callused his palm felt, but then my brain finally pulled itself out of its multiple orgasm-induced stupor.
We’d had sex.
And not just normal, everyday sex, but sex that had started with us arguing and, somewhere in the middle had turned into me pulling a dagger on him, and then… He’d kissed me, and it was like a switch had been thrown for both of us. How all of that had come about, I really had no idea, but I…I didn’t regret it, even though the logical voice in the back of my mind told me that everything could change in a matter of moments. I just…I couldn’t find it in me to lambast myself for this at the moment.
But I didn’t know what to say or do as my fingers rested on his side. Did I get up, thank him for the orgasm, and then remind him to stay out of my business? Or did I linger? I couldn’t do that. Tink was leaving this evening.
“You okay?” Caden asked.
I leaned my head back so I could see him. Those amber-colored eyes were only half open as they focused on me. “Yeah. Are you?”
“Barely.” His full lips tipped up in a half-grin that did funny, crazy things to my heart. “You haven’t been with someone in a while, and I wasn’t…particularly gentle.”
His concern caused another round of funny things to happen in my chest. My gaze lowered to his mouth. “It was…you were perfect.”
“What? Is that a compliment? From you?” He paused. “The same person who threatened to cut off my balls?”
“Can I take that back?”
“The cutting off my balls part?”
“No. The compliment part.”
“Harsh.”
I grinned, finding it surprising how…comfortable I was with him, even though I was lying there buck-ass naked with all my flaws on display. And there were a lot of them. Not just the scars, but the many, many nights of eating pizza, ice cream, chips….
“It’s been a while for me, too.” His voice was quiet.
That didn’t shock me. I looked up. “Not since the Queen’s spell broke?”
“No. The night you allowed me to feed, the night you saved me was the closest I’ve been to anyone really.”
“Why me?” The question left me before I could stop myself. “God, that sound
ed terrible. I mean, there is no shortage of women or men who’d light themselves on fire to be with you. And you and I, we are…”
“Complicated?”
My gaze searched his face. “That would be one word I’d use.”
“I don’t know, Brighton. I didn’t think this would happen, and I don’t think you came here expecting this.”
I laughed. “Yeah, no.”
The half-smile returned. “Those people you say would light themselves on fire to be with me? Most of them would because of who I am. The King.” His brows lowered as his hand stilled on my hip. “I didn’t—”
Although he didn’t finish, I thought I knew what he was going to say. “You didn’t want to be King.”
His eyes met mine, and there was something in them. A brief flash of emotion that traveled across his face but was gone before I could figure out what it was. “No, I didn’t. It was one of the reasons I hadn’t fed. When I did that, it put this into motion, and when I used the King’s sword, that was it. That was when I ascended.”
My mind traveled back to when that had happened. Caden had been different afterward. Quiet. And when Tink had seen him, what had he asked? Should I bow? Tink had sensed that the Prince had become the King.
“Why? Why do you not want to be King?”
His gaze shifted then to a place above my head, and he was quiet for a long time. “Certain traditions are…well, they are more like law. The kind that supersedes even biology. And…it was not something I wanted. Not after…”
Supersede biology? That made little sense, but the world of the fae was drastically different than that of the humans, just as it was similar. “You don’t think you deserve to be King, do you? Because of what you did while under the Queen’s control.”
Caden’s eyes shot back to mine. “There are a lot of things I don’t think I deserve because of that, but the kingdom is not one of them.”
“But—?”
“But, this?” His hand slid around to my ass. He squeezed, wringing a gasp from me. “I don’t think I deserve this either. Knowing that hasn’t stopped me.” He shifted suddenly, and I felt his hardness against my hip a moment before he rolled me onto my stomach. “And knowing what I do, it isn’t going to stop me now.”
My fingers dug into the sheets as I felt his mouth on my spine. He trailed a path of kisses down to my ass before he lifted my hips. “I’m selfish. I don’t think you realize that.”
A cry of pleasure left me as he entered me in one deep stroke that would’ve hurt if not for what we’d done before. Bracing himself on his arms, he caged me as his hips moved ruthlessly against mine, plunging in and out at a pace that was almost brutal and yet unbelievably hot. His lips pressed against my temple as he lifted a hand, working it under me. Those agile fingers found my bundle of nerves, and the combination of sensations was like a streak of lightning electrifying my blood. I rose onto my elbows, moving my hips back against him, panting as the release building in me came closer and closer to the edge.
He seemed to know when it was coming because he pulled out and rolled me onto my back again. There was only a brief rush of cool air against my heated, damp skin, and then his body was pressing down on mine, pressing into mine. I tangled myself with him, arms and legs and tongues twined, and when I came, so did he, and it was just as intense as the one before.
This time, after it was over, I somehow ended up sprawled across his chest, my muscles and bones completely gone.
If this was Caden being selfish, I had no problem with it. At all.
His fingers idly moved along my lower back, and I might’ve dozed off. I wasn’t sure. But the feeling of being…content was pure bliss.
I never wanted to move.
But I had to. And then what? Where did we go from here? Part of me was afraid to ask, but we’d just shared bodily fluids, so I needed to get over that.
“Caden?”
“Yes?” he rasped.
Keeping my cheek against his chest, I swallowed. “Where do we go from here?”
His hand stilled for a fraction of a moment. “I imagine you will continue hunting for Aric.”
That wasn’t what I had been asking about, but since he mentioned it… “Yes, I will.”
Caden’s chest rose beneath my cheek as he let out a heavy sigh. “I wish you would let me handle this. I plan to kill him, and I will make it slow and painful. I will make sure that he begs for your forgiveness before I end his life. Isn’t that enough?”
I lifted my head and propped my chin on his chest so I could look at him. “It’s not enough. It’s not the same.”
His eyes closed. “What else did they take from you that night?”
I pressed my lips together as I sorted through what I wanted to say. “Ivy and Ren don’t think I’m capable enough to be out there hunting. Like, at all. Not even run-of-the-mill fae. They just want me to be the Brighton I was before, one who was content to be on call doing research. I was happy that way.”
Caden’s hand started to move again. “And that changed?”
“Yeah.” I returned my cheek to his chest, staring at the dark wall. “They took that. My contentment. My happiness with the way things were. I saw value in my purpose before, and they took that, too.” I closed my eyes. “And they stole what I thought I knew about myself.”
“Were you happy before?” he asked. “Truly?”
I opened my mouth, but I found I couldn’t answer that question.
“You were afraid,” he stated, and my eyes opened. “You were afraid of me before. You helped my brother, but you were afraid of him, too. Even Tink. You blended then. Or at least tried to. You didn’t want to be seen. You just wanted to exist in your own corner of your world.”
My breath caught.
“Afterward, you were no longer afraid. You stopped trying to blend in. Now, you’re seen, and you’re heard. You stand up for yourself. You’re living. They did take a lot from you, Brighton. Your mother. Your contentment. But it also seems like you gained a lot. Not from them, but from yourself.”
Chapter 6
Tink didn’t end up leaving Monday night. Supposedly, he’d read on the internet that Tuesday was actually the best and safest day to travel. I had no idea if that was true or not. But it’d worked out because I’d spent Monday evening with him and Fabian marathoning the Avengers until one in the morning. We’d only made it through a handful of the million movies, but at this point, I was just grateful that Tink had moved on from Harry Potter and Twilight. Not that I had anything against them. I loved them with all my heart, but I was confident that I could quote at least half of those movies at this point.
I was just happy to spend a little more time with them and Dixon. It really was going to be weird waking up without a cat sitting on my chest or Tink singing made-up songs about eggs and bacon. I was happy for him, though. This trip would be good not only for him and Fabian, but Ivy was also right. It was far past time for Tink to see something other than the Amazon website.
Having them to help occupy my evening had also stopped me from obsessing over what had happened that afternoon—and what hadn’t.
Luckily, Tink and Fabian had been squirreled away in Tink’s room when I returned from Caden’s. Otherwise, it would’ve been hard to explain why I was wearing an oversized man’s shirt with a skirt.
Caden had never answered what came next for us, and that left me…unsettled. I wasn’t naive enough to think that sex—even great sex—equaled a relationship. But for me, well, it sort of did. I didn’t care what it meant or didn’t mean for other people, but for me, that was how I operated. That was why I was so shocked that I had done it at all. Surprised that there hadn’t been a moment where I’d thought we should pump the brakes. It also stunned me that I had been so comfortable with him afterward. In the few previous relationships I’d had, I didn’t lay around naked to chat. I was always quick to cover up. But with Caden, I never felt like I had anything to hide or any reason to.
After he’d drop
ped that little truth bomb about how much I’d given back to myself after the attack, he’d received a call from Tanner and had to return to Hotel Good Fae. He’d kissed me goodbye, but there’d been no promises of any sort. The only thing I think he finally accepted was that I wasn’t going to quit looking for Aric.
I’d come this far, and I wasn’t going to stop now.
When I finally did go to bed that night, I’d ended up falling right to sleep. The multiple orgasms probably had a lot to do with that, along with the popcorn-induced food coma. But throughout the day, while I searched my mother’s books for anything about Devil’s Breath and headed into the offices to comb through all the papers filed away there, my thoughts kept drifting back to Caden’s apartment. To what he’d done, what I’d done, and I came to a realization. It…it had to mean something. All of it had to. Why he didn’t want me out there looking for Aric. The reason he felt like he needed to protect me. Caden wanted me, whether he liked it or not, and that had to mean something. Because he had only been with me since he came out of the Queen’s spell, and I hadn’t been stroking his ego by stating that he could have anyone he wanted. He could, and he…he wanted me.
As I thumbed through dusty papers, scanning them, I wondered about the traditions he’d spoken of that he wanted to avoid enough to not want to be the King. Part of me still believed that he didn’t feel worthy enough after what he’d done, and I hated that for him because I knew how it felt.
My mind shifted to Ivy and Ren, who I hadn’t seen yet today.
I knew what it was to not feel good enough.
My research was about as fruitful as stressing over Caden and myself. Nothing came out of either. By the time I returned home, I had a headache from sneezing over the dusty papers that no one had looked at in ages.
I passed a small army of fae outside my place loading up suitcase after suitcase as I walked inside. I stopped counting at six bags.
Dropping my keys and purse on the foyer table, I found Tink in the living room with Fabian. Dixon sat on the couch, staring at the carrier with his ears flat. He wore a little kitty shirt that read WORLD’S WORST BACKSEAT DRIVER.
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