“Why do all the men in my life leave?”
“He’s not gone yet. Convince him to stay.”
“I won’t ask him to give up his dream.”
“Are you sure that’s his dream?”
“He only came here to open the store because he’s a big believer in Karma and felt the need to give back. If he could have found a manager for the bookstore right away, he would have left weeks ago. In fact, he almost lost the opportunity to run this fancy program in California because it took too long to convince me to come on board.” She closed her eyes and ran her hand over her face. “I knew I shouldn’t have let him in. I knew it, but for just a minute, I wanted something more.”
Louise lined up three cookies, one chocolate chip, one sugar, and one peanut butter. She eeny, meeny, miny, moe’d them until she chose the sugar cookie.
“I see it differently. Consider this.” She broke the cookie in two and dipped one half in her wine before she took the bite. She shuddered and made a face. “Not the same as milk.” She pushed the wine and cookies away. “What if that was his original plan, but you changed everything?”
“He asked me to come with him.”
Louise sat up. “See, he’s not leaving you. He wants you and Will. If you love him, go with him.”
“I can’t. I have Will to consider. He’s had enough uncertainty in his life. He’s happy here. He has friends and a community that cares about him. I won’t upset his new balance.”
By the slow shake of her head, Natalie knew that Louise understood. “Ask him to stay.”
“I can’t. I won’t. When Bobby drove away to join the army, did you ask?”
She smiled. “No, because I knew if I did, and his life turned out to be awful here, he’d always blame me.”
There it was—the truth. She’d never put Jake in a position where he had to choose. Ultimatums didn’t work out for anyone.
“I want him to stay because he wants to stay, not because he feels like he has to.”
“That’s fine, but don’t choose for him either. That’s just the ultimatum turned on its head.”
“What am I supposed to do?” She didn’t want Jake to leave, but she refused to ask him to stay. She felt like she was stuck between a rock and a wall.
“Love him while he’s here. Let him go. If he comes back, it’s not because you asked him to, but because he wanted to.”
Natalie choked down the rest of the glass of wine and gathered Will. She had so much to think about. “Thank you, Louise, you’ve been so kind.”
“We’re friends, Natalie. Friends help friends and serve them shit wine.”
Despite the situation, that brought a smile to her face.
“I’ve never had a friend.” That shook her.
“You’ve had lots of friends. There’s a whole town that would consider you a friend or a friend in waiting. Let them in, and in the meantime, Jake is your friend, and if he’s leaving, wouldn’t it be nice to have more time with your best friend?”
As she and Will walked to the car, she considered Louise’s counsel. Jake leaving didn’t take him completely out of her life; it simply reverted him from lover to friend.
“How about we go for pizza in Copper Creek? If Jake’s not busy, he can join us.”
Will sat in the front seat with crossed arms and a frown. “Why would we invite him?”
How did she explain to a kid what she had a hard time processing as an adult? “Because he’s our friend.”
She sent a quick text to him.
Heading out to Piper’s for pizza. Care to join us? We could celebrate your good news.
He wrote back right away.
I’ll be there.
She beat him to the restaurant and waited in the same booth that they’d sat at before. Will headed straight to the arcade with a ten-dollar bill.
Each time the door opened, her heart raced. Each time it wasn’t him, it sank.
When he appeared, her heart hurt. The sadness in his eyes was crushing. Jake was a positive person. She couldn’t recall a single time where he appeared broken until now.
As his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, he looked around until he saw her and rushed her way.
She would have slid out of the booth if she wasn’t certain her knees would collapse. Instead, she moved over so he could sit beside her.
They both started with hi.
“You first,” he said.
The thump, thump of her heart, drowned out the noise surrounding them. Gone was the radio, the chatter, and the pings and dings of games in the arcade. She was alone with him in a sea of sound and people she couldn’t see or hear.
“Hi.” She forced a smile to her face and prayed that the tears pooling in her eyes wouldn’t spill forth. “Thanks for coming.”
“I’ll always be there for you.”
Wouldn’t that be great? “I’m sorry I got so upset. It’s hard to lose someone you … you care about.”
He scooted closer. “You’re not losing me.”
“I know. We’ll always be friends.”
He took a deep breath in and let it out through his mouth. “This is not what I had imagined. I didn’t expect to meet you and fall so hard and fast. I’ll stay. All you have to do is ask.”
She knew that was true. “I’d never ask. And before you tell me anything else, you need to know that this isn’t me protecting myself from hurt. It’s me protecting what we have, which is a wonderful friendship.”
“But we’re more than that.” He cupped her cheek, and she leaned into his hand.
“Yes, we are.”
“Come with me, Natalie. I can take care of you and Will. I want you in my life.”
“I appreciate that, but I’m a girl who used to run from place to place looking for home, and I found it in Aspen Cove. I know you’d make Los Angeles great for us, but I won't take Will back to the place where he knew so much pain. You have a job to do. People need you.” She leaned into him and rested her head on his shoulder. “You judge your worth in the world by how many people you can help, and you help so many. Look at what you did for us. Our lives changed because of you. Aspen Cove was my salvation, and I don’t want it to become your hell.”
Will walked to the booth with eyes full of distrust.
“Hey, buddy.” Jake reached out to ruffle Will’s hair, but Will sidestepped his touch.
“I thought you loved us,” Will said.
Jake looked at Natalie. “I do. I love both of you.”
“Nat says you’re our friend, but you’re breaking the rules.” A tear slid from Will’s cheek.
“What rule?”
“No cheating, no stealing, no lies.”
“And which one did I break?”
“You stole our hearts, and you’re leaving, which means you’re stealing my hopes. I wanted you to be my family. You talk about living your life, but you don’t practice what you preach. You let your life live you.”
Jake stood and pulled Will into his arms. “I’m sorry, Will. I’m so sorry, but your sister is right. I have to do this. If I don’t, then I’ll never know and always wonder. As for family, you are family. The family I choose, and I’ll always be there for you.”
“Yeah, that’s what they all say.”
The next hour was more painful than the first because they remained silent. Any talk about the future or the past ended in tears.
Natalie had the waiter box up the pizza they didn’t eat, and they walked out. She held on to him for a long minute before she raised on tiptoes to kiss him goodbye.
“You’re the best man I know, Jake Powers. Stay that way.” She climbed into her car and drove off.
Chapter Twenty-Six
He stepped off the plane in Los Angeles. The airport was full of people rushing in every direction, but it appeared as if they weren’t going anywhere. He grabbed his bag and made his way outside, where a car waited.
The day was warm though the sun didn’t peek through the polluted sky. He’d heard the locals
called it June gloom. While everywhere else was moving into summer, Los Angeles spent a month in a haze.
Up ahead, a man held a sign with his name. Jake Powers, it said. There was a time in his life that he’d have puffed up with pride seeing his name on display. Now he wondered if it really mattered. Notoriety didn’t make life special; it only made life busy and complicated.
He’d driven by the bookstore on his way out of town, but Natalie had closed it for the day. He went by the house, but she wasn’t there either.
He left Aspen Cove feeling hollower than the day he got his diagnosis. Back then, he was dying from an ailment. Today, he was succumbing to heartache.
“Are you Jake?” the rotund man dressed in a black suit asked.
“I am.”
“I’m Roger.” He took his bag and placed it in the back of the town car, and opened the rear door. “It’s a twenty-minute trip if we had wings, but we have to get on the 405, and that means we’ll travel like a slug. Welcome to your new home.” He eased into the traffic, and they were on their way.
He thought about Natalie and how she didn’t want to leave Aspen Cove because it was home. He thought about Doc and his story about Phyllis. Doc never left Aspen Cove because Phyllis was home. When was the last time he felt like anyplace or anyone was home?
“Yesterday,” he said aloud.
“Excuse me?”
Just thinking. “Tell me, Roger, do you have a family?”
The man chuckled. “Three families. Two ex-wives and seven kids between them. The new wife hasn’t left me yet, things are good, but she will.”
Jake was taken aback. “Why would you say that?”
“I work too much. Do you know how many hours I have to work to pay child support and alimony? The first wife left because I didn’t work enough, the second because I worked too much. Wife three, she’ll figure it out. I spend more time making a living than I do having a life. Why does everything have to be so complicated?”
“It doesn’t have to be.” The words tasted bitter on his tongue. “It doesn’t have to be,” he repeated. “Holy hell, it doesn’t have to be. Who am I trying to impress? Myself. What do I want in life? To be happy. Where am I happy? There. With her.”
“You okay?”
Jake laughed. “Yes, I’m great.” He threw his hands in the air. “Holy hell, I am great, but you’re heading in the wrong direction.” He would have stayed in Aspen Cove if she’d only told him she loved him. Now in hindsight, he wanted to smack himself upside the head. Those words were hard for Natalie because she expected him to leave—she knew he would, and he did. But she didn’t have to say the words for him to know she felt love. She showed it when she let him go. She wasn’t selfish in any way. She sacrificed her heart so he could achieve his dream. Looking out the window, he knew this wasn’t the dream. He wanted clean air, Will’s laughter, and her smile. Like Will said, wasn’t it time he practiced what he preached? He could make a life or make a living. He chose life.
“Nope,” Roger said. “I know where I’m going.”
Jake leaned forward. “So do I, and it’s not Vision Quest. Take me back to the airport.”
“Listen, man, if I don’t deliver you, I don’t get paid.”
“I’ll pay you double. Take me back now.”
“You got it.” Roger whipped the car around and dropped him off in front of the terminal a few minutes later.
As he approached the counter, his phone pinged with an incoming message. It was Natalie.
Hey, just making sure you arrived safely. Will and I miss you already.
Did he tell her he was coming back? No, he’d keep that as a surprise.
I just landed, and I’m on my way to where I need to be.
He watched the dots scroll, then disappear and then scroll and disappear before she replied.
I’m glad it’s working out. Take care.
His fingers danced across the keys. It will work out, and I’ll be back to see you and Will before you know it.
He smiled as he approached the counter. “How fast can you get me to Denver?”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
The bookstore wasn’t the same without Jake. It could have been because he wasn’t around every corner to give her a kiss, a hug, or tell her how fabulous she was. Mostly it felt as if the sun forgot to rise today.
“Will, can you go to the diner and get us dinner to go? I don’t feel like cooking.”
He sprawled across a beanbag chair, doing a lot of nothing. “We have leftover pizza.”
“I know, but that reminds me of Jake. How about burgers and fries?”
The mention of burgers and fries always cheered him up. “Are we rich?” He rolled off the bag and climbed to his feet.
She thought about the question for a minute. Jake once said there were different ways to measure wealth, and he was right.
“Yes, we are. We’re rich in love and friendship and patience.”
“But not money.”
She shrugged. “It’s all perspective. There will always be someone who has more, and someone who has less.”
He rolled his eyes. “Now you sound like Jake.”
She laughed. “I guess I do. He taught us a lot while he was here. He showed me I could trust others, and I could open my heart to love.”
“Did you tell him you loved him?”
She shook her head. “No, I didn’t.”
He huffed and frowned. “Do you think he would have stayed if you had?”
She knew the answer. “Yes. I'm sure he would have.”
Will stomped his foot. “Then why didn’t you?” he yelled. “You’re the reason he left.”
“I loved him so much that I had to let him go, Will.” As much as it hurt, it was the right decision. If he ever came back, it would be because he wanted to, not because he felt obligated.
“I don’t get it.”
She took a twenty from her wallet. “Someday you will, because you’re smart, but for now get us burgers and fries. I’ll close up. I added the Disney channel to our cable. How about we sit on the couch and watch movies?” The light twinkled in his eyes, but he’d never give in that easily.
“All right,” he said with a sigh. “But no girlie love stuff.”
She laughed.
She closed up the shop and walked by the self-help aisle to pull out his book. She’d done that at least six times that day just to look at his face. Rather than put it back, she tucked it inside her bag and left. Will was already in the Subaru eating his fries when she got in the car.
“Hey, I thought we would sit around and watch a movie while we ate, but you’ll finish before we get home.”
“Well, I saw Louise, and she asked me to stay the night. I said yes because I knew you wouldn’t mind.”
“Will, that’s called manipulation, and it’s a bad trait.”
“Can I go anyway?”
She couldn’t say no. Keeping Will happy and occupied kept him from moping around about Jake’s absence.
“Yes, but next time you try to manipulate the situation, it will be a no. I’m letting you go this time because I know you’re sad, and having friends makes you happy.”
“Thank you, but you’re sad too. What will you do?”
She wasn’t about to tell him that she’d stare at the book and cry all night. Instead, she lifted her brows. “I’m watching Cinderella on repeat all night long.”
Will made a gagging sound before digging into more fries.
She started the car and pulled out from behind the building. The sun set on the horizon, painting an orange glow across the sky. It was a perfect Aspen Cove day minus Jake.
She pulled into her driveway and glanced to her left to see the flowers blooming in her yard. Little by little, everything was coming together. She might not have love in her life, but she had everything else.
“Let’s get inside so you can pack a bag.” Will got out of the car and walked up the steps, stopping halfway. He turned toward her with a look of con
fusion. She hurried forward to see what was happening. Sitting on the porch looking exhausted but so damn sexy was Jake.
“Oh my God, what are you doing here?”
“I left my heart here, and I can’t live without it.”
Will didn’t wait for explanations. He lunged forward and nearly tackled Jake to the wooden planks. “I knew you’d come back.”
Jake hugged Will and stood. “You did?”
Will nodded. “I did. You love us, and we love you. We belong together.”
Jake stood and looked at her. “Yes, I love you, and I know you love me.”
She moved toward him. “I do. I love you.” She lifted on tiptoes and kissed him.
“Gross,” Will said.
“You think that now but give it a year or two.” Jake locked eyes with her. “I’m here to stay if you’ll have me. I don’t want to make a living. I want to make a life with you and Will. You are home to me. We’re a family.”
All the heaviness in her heart lifted. “Yes, we are.”
A car pulled up in front, and Louise got out. “Are you ready, Will?”
He looked at Jake. “You’re staying, right? Like when I get home tomorrow, you’ll be here?”
He nodded. “Yep, I’ll be here tomorrow and the next day and the next.” He turned to Natalie. “If you’ll have me.”
“Are you crazy? I’ll have you now and forever.”
Will took the keys from his sister and unlocked the door. “Can I be the best man at your wedding?”
Natalie laughed. “Don’t rush things, Will.”
“Rush? I’ve been waiting all my life to have a family.”
He ran inside to get his things.
Louise walked up the sidewalk. “Perfect timing.”
“Thanks, Louise. I appreciate it,” Jake said.
Natalie narrowed her eyes. “You knew he was coming back?”
“Honey, they always come back.”
Jake hugged Natalie to his side. “I called her from the road. I thought you might like to start the rest of our lives off right.” He leaned down and whispered in her ear, “Naked and in my arms.”
“Will, hurry up,” she called. “My life is waiting for me.”
He ran out with his backpack. He gave them both a hug, and just before he climbed into Louise’s car, he yelled, “My room is still off-limits.”
One Hundred Decisions: An Aspen Cove Romance Page 19