by Kennedy Fox
“Not all love is meant to last forever,” I say. “Your lessons were kinda ruthless now that I think about it.”
She finishes chewing. “If by ruthless, you mean truthful, then yes.”
We empty our bowls, then I grab them and rinse them in the sink. I let out a yawn and realize how tired my eyes are when I blink, probably from crying. “I think I’m going to go upstairs and lie down for a little while,” I tell her. Grabbing my phone, I notice I have a text message from Hayden. I swallow hard, knowing I need to read it when I’m alone.
She gives me nod and follows me into the living room.
“I wanna wait for Dad to come before I leave,” I tell her, heading toward the stairs.
“Alright, sweetheart. I’ll wake up you up when he gets here.” She grabs a book off the side table and sits in her reading chair.
I go up to my old room that’s been transformed into a guest room. I sit on the edge of the bed and open the text message Hayden sent, but the end is what destroys me.
…I’ve endured worse pain than that before from you.
I’m so mad at myself for agreeing to see him again, but I thought things would be different. He doesn’t know the truth from ten years ago, and he doesn’t know why I had to ditch him today.
I lie back on the bed and reminisce about being a teenager. I lived without a fucking worry in the world. Life was easy. Love was easy. Being an adult isn’t all that it’s cut out to be.
As I stare at the ceiling, I remember my old yearbooks and photo albums are stuffed in a box in the top of the closet. I grab it from the shelf and set it down. Taking my time, I gently pull out the pictures and look at them. I laugh at photos of me and Donny in the school’s production of The Wizard of Oz. I played Dorothy, and he was the cutest Toto in the world. Toward the end of the photo album are pictures of Hayden and me after the production of Little Shop of Horrors I did my senior year. He’s looking at me like I’m his everything, the same way he looked at me this morning. I get emotional as I travel down memory lane, but I force myself to continue anyway. The what-ifs and might-have-beens rip through me along with the regret of what I did to him.
My phone vibrates, and I look down and see it’s another text from Hayden. Though I’d rather not know what he has to say, I unlock my phone and read the message.
Hayden: We need to talk.
I throw my phone toward the end of the bed, not sure what I’d say. Talking to him is out the question, and I don’t think I could even look him in the eyes knowing what I now know. Maybe Veronica being pregnant with his baby is fate’s way of telling me it’s time to finally move on.
I pick up my phone and decide to block his number once and for all, in case he tries to contact me again. It’s better this way—or at least, that’s what I’m telling myself.
Chapter Eight
Hayden
I sit in Veronica’s driveway and try to think about what I’m going to say when I see her. I check my phone to see if Savannah texted me back, but when I open it, all I see is a message from Veronica saying the front door is unlocked and to let myself in. Fuck. She has the wrong idea completely.
I walk to her door and push open the door. Sunshine splashes in through the large windows, and I look around the room, not seeing her anywhere.
“Hello?” I say.
“I’m in here.” Her voice echoes down the hallway, and I walk toward it.
I step inside her room, and my brows raise at the scene in front of me.
“Hey baby,” she purrs.
Crossing my arms over my chest, I stare at her desperate attempt to seduce me.
Veronica pushes up on her elbows and smiles. “I’ve been waiting for you.”
My feet stay planted on the floor, not impressed by her tactics. “Okay. Well I’m here. What do you want?”
She pushes her bra strap over her shoulder. “Come closer…”
“No, Veronica. That’s not gonna happen. In fact, I’m not sure what you think is happening between us, but it’s not this.” I run my fingers through my hair, and she studies my stance. Once she realizes I’m not interested and that she’s being rejected, her mood turns sour.
“What the hell does that mean?” she snaps, pulling up her bra strap.
“I’m sorry, but I think there’s been a misunderstanding here,” I tell her truthfully. She looks defeated. “I think you’re a pretty woman, but I’m not attracted to you like that. We’re just friends, and I’m sorry if I led you on or made you think otherwise.” I try to sound as sincere as possible, but the daggers she’s shooting me tells me she doesn’t accept my words.
She sits up on the bed. “This is because of that bitch, isn’t it?”
I shake my head. “Don’t call her that.”
Standing up, she storms to her dresser and puts a T-shirt over her body and slips on some pajama bottoms. “I know you’re lying, Hayden. I thought what we had was special, or that it was leading somewhere special. I thought you were being a gentleman and just taking it slow out of respect for me.”
“I’m sorry.”
Tears stream down her face. “Why don’t you give me a chance? We could have everything together. A family. A great life. The whole big house, white picket fence fairy tale.”
I shake my head. “That’s not what I want with you, Veronica.”
She comes over and grabs my hand. The feeling is foreign and odd. “Please don’t do this,” she begs, tears in her eyes. “Let me give you a family.”
The conversation is going nowhere fast, and she’s becoming more upset with each passing second. “I should go.”
Pulling away from her, I walk out of the bedroom and back down the hallway. She follows me.
“I can’t believe you,” she snaps. “After everything we’ve been through together.”
Turning, I narrow my eyes at her. “What are you talking about? We haven’t been through anything together, Veronica. We’ve been friends since day one. Nothing romantic has ever or will ever happen between us. Are you serious right now? I don’t know what you want from me, but I never crossed that line for a reason. I’m not interested. If you need a friend, I’ll be around, but anything more than that ends here. This can’t continue.” I open the front door and step outside, but I hear her on my tail before the door can shut.
“I could’ve given you things Savannah will never give you. Stability. A family. Unconditional love. You’re making the biggest mistake of your life, Hayden! She’ll only continue to break your heart!”
Shaking my head, I walk down the sidewalk as she continues to run her mouth.
“That’s for me to decide,” I shout over my shoulder before climbing into my truck. I can’t get out of here fast enough. I back out of the driveway and rush down the road. I’m in such a fucked-up head space I don’t even know what to do. My stomach growls, and I know I need to eat, but everything is such a shitshow right now I don’t know where to start. Before heading home, I call Hunter, hoping he can talk me off the ledge.
“Your intelligent brother who has all life’s answers speaking…” he greets, and I can hear the smugness in his tone. It’s one of our things to confide in each other when things aren’t so great. Though I’m his big brother, I know Hunter always has my back.
I let out a huff. “I need a beer and a burger. What are you doing right now?”
“I’m shaving my legs,” he says, then chuckles. “What the hell do you think I’m doing? I’m at the gym.”
I hear barbells hit the ground, and he lets out a breath. “I can meet you at the burger place by the gym in about fifteen minutes.”
“Perfect. I’ll see you there.” I enter the highway and head toward his location as I replay everything that’s happened in the past twenty-four hours. Shaking my head, I think how crazy Veronica really is and how I missed it from the beginning. I feel as if I’m living in the damn twilight zone.
Taking the exit, I get stuck at the light and check my phone to see if by some miracle Savannah actu
ally texted me back. She hasn’t. Soon I’m pulling up the sports bar and park. After I get out of the truck, I see Hunter walking from around the corner in sweat-covered clothes.
“Before you say anything, I didn’t have a chance to shower,” he says, holding the door open for an older couple.
“Hmm. Not sure what gave it away.” I deadpan.
We walk inside, and I immediately order a beer when we get to the bar. Hunter shakes his head as he watches me down it in two gulps, then orders himself a glass of water.
“So you gonna tell me what’s up?” He glances at me, then back at the menu.
“I don’t know where to even start,” I say honestly, then decide to order another beer.
Hunter’s patient and sits quietly as I try to organize my thoughts. “I know you’re going to roll your eyes and tell me I’m fucking crazy.” I shrug. “But I could still feel the chemistry between Savannah and I this morning. There’s still something between us. I felt it, and I know for a fact she did too.”
“She lives in New York, Hayden,” he reminds me as if I forgot that little fact.
The bartender sets my second beer in front of me, and I immediately take it, ready to drink the pain away. “I know. I know she does. That’s the only thing that complicates this whole scenario. She’s heading back, but there are things we have to discuss, things I can’t put to rest even after all this time. Anyway, I asked her to lunch this morning and told her to think about it and text me when she made up her mind. Not long after, she said she would, and we agreed I’d come pick her up. Well, when I showed up at her hotel room, she wasn’t there. I called and texted, and she never responded. It’s like she’s ghosting me all over again, and I can’t get over why the hell she changed her mind. It’s really bothering the fuck out of me because when I left, everything seemed fine.”
Hunter drinks his water then looks at me, a serious expression over his face. “I don’t know why you’re so hung up on a high school relationship when Veronica is so ready and willing to be with you. You never even gave it a chance.”
I know he’s just trying to help, considering how I took the breakup and what he had to witness, but I stop him before he can say another word. “Veronica and I are nothing. I told her exactly how I felt, and she freaked out and went insane. I can’t be with someone I’m not attracted to. I apologized if she felt I had led her on by agreeing to go to the wedding with her, but I made it very clear I didn’t feel the same way for her as she clearly does for me. The heart knows what it wants, and it’s not her. You out of anyone should understand that,” I say.
Hunter narrows his eyes at me, knowing exactly what I’m talking about even if he refuses to acknowledge I’m right. “I just don’t get it. Savannah destroyed you, and I don't know if I can really forgive her for doing that to you. You always were my hero and to see you so broken because of her was painful as fuck to watch. I hated her for you and part of me had to go through some of those emotions too while I helped you through it.”
I’ve never heard him admit that before, and it somewhat takes me by surprise. Hunter being so much younger than me, I never realized it affected him too. “I know, but the thing is, there’s way more to the story than what you know. I’ve never told a soul, it’s a secret I’ve kept for a decade because I promised the person who told me. Similar to you holding onto your secret right now.”
He shifts in his seat and knows I’m referring to the feelings he has for his best friend’s girlfriend, Lennon, who now happens to be his new roommate. Hunter’s buried them since she became off-limits, which I know is difficult as hell for him.
“It’s different, I’m sure,” Hunter suggests.
I shake my head. “Not really. Secrets are secrets.”
Hunter releases a breath and sits back in the stool. “You’re a smart guy, Hayden. One of the smartest people I know, and if you feel like you need to talk to her about whatever you’re harboring, then why don’t you? You know where she’s staying. Go to the hotel and wait there until she returns or contact that guy she’s always with. What’s his name again?”
I chuckle. “Donny. I guess I could, considering…” I pause and think about it. “We’re friends on Facebook, and I’m sure he already knows everything that’s going on with Sav and me.”
The bartender walks up, and Hunter flashes her his infamous flirty smile. When they’re done giving each other googly eyes, we order our food.
“Really?” I eye him when I catch him staring at the bartender’s ass the moment she walks away.
“What?” He shrugs. “I’m single. Probably for life.”
“Ever hear the phrase don’t shit where you eat? You don’t mess around with chicks you don’t plan to call back at places you want to return to.”
“Yes, I’ve heard that,” he cackles, rolling his eyes. “Why do you think I switched gyms?”
His admission makes me laugh.
“Anyway, I think you should message Donny then. Time’s against you, bro. You talk to her now, or your ass will be chasing her to New York. Apparently whatever kind of closure you need, it’s important. It’s got you wound up so damn tight, I’m waiting for you to self-destruct,” he says, laughing.
“You’re right.” I grab my phone and message Donny and ask him if Savannah is still in town. He sends back a quick reply telling me she is and that she’s still staying in her hotel room. Because he’s a stand-up guy, he lets me know she went to visit her parents for a few hours. I contemplate driving there but decide against it. I thank him, then open the last text I sent Savannah and send her another one.
Hayden: We need to talk.
I don’t expect her to reply, but little does she know that this conversation is happening whether she wants it to or not. I can’t continue living like this, and until we discuss the past, I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to fully move on.
Hunter and I get our food, and once we’re finished eating, I pay the tab since I owe him.
“Thanks for lunch. That shit was delicious,” he tells me as we walk to my truck, and I drive him over to the gym where he parked. As I slow to a stop, he turns and looks at me.
“Good luck.”
I smile. “Thanks. I’m gonna need it.”
He smiles and shakes his head. “You’re crazy as fuck.”
“I know,” I tell him as he gets out.
I decide to go home for a few hours, giving Savannah enough time to return to the hotel and enough time to calm myself down so I don’t freak out on her.
When I’m back home, I walk straight to my bed. I’m exhausted from sleeping on that small ass couch last night. After setting my alarm, I kick off my shoes and quickly fall asleep with Savannah on my mind.
The next thing I know, three hours have passed, and the buzzing rips me from a dead sleep. I get up and leave. As I’m driving over, I notice the sun hanging onto the horizon and splashes of pink and purple on display. Savannah is on my mind; she’s all I can think about. I refuse to allow her to fly back to New York without having this conversation. This discussion can no longer be avoided, and it will be settled tonight even if it’s the last thing I do.
I pull up to valet, and the guy who’s parked my truck each time laughs. “Back again?”
“Unfinished business,” I tell him, confidence oozing from my tone.
As I step inside the hotel, I run my fingers through my hair and look around. I contemplate going to the bar and taking a few shots before heading to her room. I look in that direction, and a smirk hits my face when I see Savannah sitting at the bar drinking a glass of wine. She’s going to have a hard time running away this time.
I cross the lobby and notice the stool next to her is empty. As I’m walking toward her, I can’t seem to pull my eyes away. She’s so fucking beautiful, even when she looks like the saddest woman on the planet.
“Is this seat taken?” I ask, and she immediately turns and looks at me, her eyes going wide.
She lets out a ragged breath and tries to ignor
e me, but I sit anyway.
“What are you doing here?” Savannah doesn’t make eye contact with me. “Thought you’d be proposing to Veronica, considering she’s having your baby and all.”
My jaw drops. “What did you say?”
Savannah turns and looks at me, shooting daggers. “Didn’t she tell you?”
Laughter roars from deep within. “Wait.” It takes everything I have to find my words. “Pregnant with my baby? I’m pretty sure you have to have sex to get someone pregnant, Sav. You know how it works,” I tell her with a grin, then order a shot of whiskey when the bartender comes up.
She looks at me like I’ve grown a third eye. “I saw the ultrasound, Hayden. I saw the date, and it was from only two weeks ago. I saw her name on it. I held it in my hand. So congratulations.” She deadpans, and I want to shake her.
“Hang on.” I hold up my hand. “When did you see Veronica?”
She takes a sip of her drink, then looks over at me slowly. “After you left, she showed up at my room begging me to stay away from you because her baby needed a daddy. So hold on. Are you telling me—”
“I’m not her baby’s daddy. Wow.” I release a slow breath. “This all makes sense now. Why she was so desperate to get me in her bed. Why she was wearing lingerie and doing everything possible to seduce me.” I face her and lean closer to her. “Sav, we never even kissed. Hell, I didn’t want to kiss her. She probably is pregnant but tried to trap me. I knew something wasn’t right with how she was acting. Un-fucking-believable.”
I can tell she’s trying to work out what I’m saying as I put all the pieces together as well. Anger flashes across her face, and I try to swallow down my frustration with this whole thing.
I can tell she’s upset. Her leg is shaking on the barstool as she processes everything. I grab her hand and tilt her chin so she looks at me. “Please say you believe me?”
For the first time since I sat down, her eyes soften when they meet mine. She slightly nods. “Yes. I do. I’m so sorry, Hayden. I can’t believe I bought her pathetic story and let her manipulate me again. I seriously hate her.”